Katie Opens Her Heart (32 page)

“Name’s Vern,” Esther’s father said as he extended his hand.

Katie shook it and smiled.

“Let’s get busy then.” Vern laughed. “How about you watch us, Katie, and tell us if we do anything wrong.”

Katie nodded.

Mary began by emptying the bowls of ice cream mix she’d prepared into the round metal containers inside the freezers. Vern put the lids on, attached the cranks to the lids, and poured ice between the metal containers and the surrounding wooden tubs. He stopped when the ice came within a few inches of the top of the metal containers.

“Right so far?” Vern asked as he glanced toward Katie.

Katie nodded. “You don’t want anything to get close to the lid.”

“That’s what I thought because I still need room for the rock salt, I think.” Vern turned his words into action, pouring a stream of rock salt around the top of the ice. He threw a switch when he finished. Both freezers groaned into action, as the motors turned the metal containers round and round.

“At least you don’t have to turn the crank by hand like we do,” Katie said.

Vern smiled and hollered above the increasing racket, “How do I know when the ice cream is done?”

“When you can’t turn them by hand anymore. That’s the only rule I know.” Katie told him.

“Obviously that rule wouldn’t apply here,” Vern said with a grin. “We’ll figure out something, I suppose.”

“Come.” Esther tugged on Katie’s arm. “Let’s go. Dad can handle it now.”

Katie turned to follow Esther upstairs, and Vern hollered after her, “Thanks for the help.”

“You’re welcome,” Katie hollered back. “But I really didn’t do anything.” She really hadn’t, Katie thought on the way up the stairs. So maybe Esther’s parents were just trying to make her feel welcome. Still, they had seemed truly thankful, so perhaps they really had wanted her opinion on ice cream making. It was a thought that sent positive feelings running around her heart.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Katie held her breath as Esther roared into
Mamm
’s driveway, her headlights cutting through the darkness and bouncing off the sides of the house. The hour was late, and if
Mamm
wasn’t awake and waiting for her, Esther’s noise and lights would wake her up for sure.
Mamm
being awake was the last thing Katie wanted at the moment. There was too much joy running through her from the wonderful evening she’d spent with the youth group. To see
Mamm
’s sad face would ruin everything. Perhaps tomorrow she could deal with her disapproval, but not tonight.

It had been such a great evening. First there had been the volleyball, and then everyone had sat on the lawn eating homemade ice cream and little cupcakes Esther’s
mamm
, Mary, had prepared. And if that hadn’t been enough, Mary had made everyone hot chocolate with marshmallows. Even better were the friendly chats Katie had with Margaret and several other girls.

Bryan and John, whom she’d met at Roy’s birthday party, hadn’t played beside her during the game tonight, but a different set of boys had. Bill and Charles, they said their names were. They both had spoken with her as the game progressed—nothing in particular, just friendly. And friendly was what Katie craved right now. Even Roy had made a point of saying goodbye to her. There was nothing special about his words either, which was
gut
. “Special” was something she couldn’t handle right now. With a whirl, Esther swung her car around before coming to a stop.

“Goodnight, Katie,” Esther said, still cheerful.

“Goodnight! And thanks for taking me,” Katie said. Hopefully the dread of encountering
Mamm
wasn’t evident in her voice. She’d caught a glimpse of light in the kitchen window, so
Mamm
was still up.

“Hope to do this again really soon,” Esther chirped.

“
Yah
. Thanks again.” Katie got out and closed the car door behind her. She did hope to do this again—and many times more. Katie walked across the front yard as Esther’s car headed down the driveway, the headlight beams bouncing from the uneven road.

Katie went up the front steps and stepped inside. Standing still in the silence, she listened. There was no sound coming from the kitchen, so perhaps
Mamm
had just left the light burning for her. But then a chair scraped on the kitchen floor, and Katie’s stomach sank.

“Katie, is that you?”
Mamm
called from the kitchen.

“
Yah
.” Katie walked closer. She glanced into the kitchen and forced a smile.
Mamm
was sitting there reading her magazine. Her face had even more sorrow written on it than when she’d left, Katie decided. She looked away as the feeling of
Mamm
’s pain pierced her heart, especially as she now knew that next week she was going to do the same thing and the week after that. The Mennonite youth group was simply too
wunderbah
for her to stop attending. This was obviously going to take another miracle from
Da Hah
to figure out how to handle it.

“Sit down,”
Mamm
said. “We need to talk.”

Katie drew in a long breath and sat down.

“I assume you had a
gut
night.”
Mamm
smiled but the effort looked forced.

Katie nodded, saying nothing.
Mamm
was sure using different methods on her lately. Some of them hurt more than the old ones had. Apparently there was no lecture coming, so Jesse must already be teaching
Mamm
the best way her daughter could be “won back to the faith.” “
Mamm
, if you’re worried about me leaving the Amish, I’m not planning on that.”

“That’s
gut
,”
Mamm
said. “But that’s not what I want to talk to you about.”

Katie looked up with a startled expression on her face. “Has something happened?”

Mamm
’s smile was pained. “Not unless you count my planned wedding to Jesse Mast.”

Katie looked confused. “You already have my approval.”

“That’s not it either,”
Mamm
said. “I’d like you to come with me Tuesday night when I visit with Jesse’s family.”

Katie groaned. “I was hoping you’d go alone,
Mamm
. They hate me.”

Mamm
sighed. “They don’t hate you, Katie. They don’t really even know you…or me for that matter. I’ve already met the oldest girl, Mabel, and I think she’s more heartbroken over losing her
mamm
than anything else.”

“I can’t do this.” Katie stood. “Once you’ve said your marriage vows with Jesse—if you get it done and we move in—that’s one thing. Before that, they’ll eat me alive.”

Mamm
tried to smile. “I know this is hard, Katie, but it’s the least you can do for me.”

“
Mamm
, please,” Katie begged. “I’m too scared. And it’s even worse now that I know how nice some folks can be.”

Mamm
looked pale. “How can my daughter say such things about her own people?”

“
Mamm
, please.” Katie moved closer, touching
Mamm
’s arm. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think how that would sound. And I have been treated nicely by many of our people in the community—just not by the young people.”

Mamm
sighed. “You’ve let awful things enter your heart, Katie. Our young people love you. Don’t doubt the love of our people. And look how
Da Hah
sent me your
daett
to love me and now Jesse. How then can you run away from us, Katie?”

“I’m not running away,” Katie protested.

“I wish you would come back to us, Katie,”
Mamm
whispered. “It’s still not too late.”

So this was, after all, about persuading her to give up the Mennonites. Katie shook her head. “I’m still going back. I’m not like you,
Mamm
. I know you were a better person than I am, but I can’t do anything about the way I am.”

“Katie…”
Mamm
stood to take Katie in her arms. “I don’t mean that at all. And I didn’t mean to bring up the Mennonites tonight. I guess I just keep slipping back there.”

Katie didn’t say anything, allowing her head to rest on
Mamm
’s shoulder. It felt
gut
, but she wasn’t a little girl any longer. She was growing up. Pushing away, Katie sat down again.

Mamm
held on to her arm. “Please, Katie. Come with me when I visit Jesse and his children. It would be so much easier for me if I weren’t alone, and also easier for you in the long run. You don’t want the wedding to arrive without knowing Jesse’s children better.”

Put that way, it made perfect sense, Katie thought. Only it didn’t make perfect sense. When someone didn’t like you, nothing made sense. But
Mamm
wanted her to go, and she really couldn’t turn her down. And where was her faith that
Da Hah
could and would work things out?

Katie nodded. “Okay, I’ll go with you.”

“Oh thank you, Katie!”
Mamm
give her another big hug.

Katie squeezed her back this time.

Mamm
finally let go, saying, “
Gut
night then. Remember, I love you.”

“
Gut
night,” Katie replied, finding her way upstairs in the dark. She lit a match and transferred the flame to her kerosene lamp. She sat down on the bed in the flickering light and stared out the window at the stars. They twinkled brightly back at her, seeming to smile out of the heavens.
What a sorry ending to a beautiful evening
, Katie thought. Not that
Mamm
was to blame. The trip to Jesse’s house would weigh heavy on anyone’s shoulders. But it would have been nice to come home tonight and spend the rest of her waking moments thinking about her fun evening before drifting off to sleep.

Now she was going to lie here and worry about how horrible things would be when they arrived at Jesse’s place. They would sit in Jesse’s living room with all of his children gathered around. They would be staring at Emma Raber’s daughter from a close range. No doubt
Mamm
would have the worst of it, since she was Emma Raber. How in the world did
Mamm
plan to become these children’s
mamm
?

But Katie had problems of her own to figure out. When
Mamm
married Jesse, she would have to move with
Mamm
to Jesse’s house. Such a move would change so much, and in ways that couldn’t be anticipated. For one, what was to become of her new life among the Mennonites? Could she still attend the gatherings? Would she still get to see Margaret and Sharon once in awhile? Yet she couldn’t spend all her life around Margaret and Sharon. Life moved on, and so would Margaret and Sharon.

So what were her plans beyond enjoying her time with the Mennonite youth? Would she marry one of their boys someday? The thought sent shivers of fear up and down her spine. She’d often wondered what it would be like to make a boy happy, to see love shining out of his eyes for her. But never in her wildest imaginations had he been a Mennonite. If she joined the Mennonites she would have to change her dress, throw away her
kapp
, and buy a car. Katie stared at the flickering light. And she would have electric lights in the house, the kind Esther’s
mamm
and
daett
had, which were turned on by a switch somewhere. She hadn’t touched any of them, but she’d walked past them. Could she live in a house that had power from the outside world flowing through the wiring in the walls?

Katie shivered.
Nee
, that was a little too much to even imagine. Perhaps it was
gut
that
Mamm
had spoken with her tonight, and that she’d agreed to go along to Jesse’s place. That way her options were still open either way. Perhaps by some miracle Jesse’s children would like her, and she could have brothers and sisters of her own. Was that not what she’d wanted for years? It was, Katie told herself before she blew out the light. She would try hard next week to be nice to Jesse’s children. She would tell them “hi” just like the Mennonite youth told everyone “hi.” Jesse was a
gut
man. She’d always thought so. And perhaps
Da Hah
was bringing this thought to comfort her so she would help
Mamm
with Jesse’s children.
Mamm
would need all the help she could get.

Katie slid under the covers and tossed and turned for a long time. She should get out of bed and pray, Katie thought. But she was too tired from the long evening. She would just trust that
Da Hah
was still guiding her life, and He had a plan for her that was more
wunderbah
than she could envision. With a slight smile on her face, Katie dropped off to sleep.

Chapter Thirty-Nine

The following Sunday morning Katie sat beside
Mamm
in the buggy as they drove toward Bishop Miller’s place for the morning services. Ahead of them other buggies had appeared on the road, all going the same direction.
Mamm
slapped the reins as hoof beats and the rattle of a fast-approaching buggy came from behind them.

“He won’t try to pass you,” Katie told
Mamm
after a quick glance back. “It’s Joe Helmuth and his sisters.”