Keep it Secret (25 page)

“Come with me.”

“Where to, baby?”

“When I go see Kimberly,
come with me.” I broke our embrace so I was able to see his
expression. He smiled sweetly bringing his lips to my ear before he
answered.

“I’d do anything for you,
Ava.” He whispered, sending shivers all over my body. He hesitated
like he wanted to say more, I guess he changed his mind because he
grazed his lips from my ear to my cheek. He looked at me sideways
before planting the sexiest kiss on my cheek. His soft plump lips
lingered on my skin before breaking away.

“Anything.”

That night I sent the good
doctor an email.

From:
[email protected]

To:
[email protected]

Sent: Monday, October 14,
2013 11:37 PM

Subject:
Forgiveness

When and where?

Ava

Sent from my
iPhone

Two weeks later, on an early
cold Saturday morning in November I was on my way to pick up
Gabriel from his condo. It was visiting day for the prisoners at
the Denver Women's Correctional Facility Dr. Charles agreed to meet
me there. He had no idea I was bringing Gabriel I figured it was
none of his business. Doc had also arranged a private room for us
to speak I had no idea how he did it. Outside of his condo building
I texted Gabriel that I was there. Minutes later he walked out the
building looking as delicious as ever. Instead of opening the
passenger door he rounded the hood of the truck and opened my
side.

“What are you doing?” I
asked.

“I think, it’s best if I
drive.” Ah, he had a point. Unbuckling my seatbelt I jumped out the
truck standing directly in front of him. Gabriel’s eyes ate me up
our attraction was too strong. We might not act on it, but we were
too weak not to admire each other. I instantly thought about the
way he sounded when he was coming or the feeling of his mouth
around my breasts. Gabriel placed both hands on each side of my
hips bringing me to him letting go of my hips he pulled me in for a
hug. Easily I wrapped myself around his neck coming to my tippy
toes I hugged him back.

“Hi.” He whispered in my
ear.

“Hi.” I whispered back.
Pulling back from each other he bent down to kiss my cheek. I bit
down on my bottom lip trying to suppress my physical need for him I
walked away before we did something we would both
regret.

The two-hour drive to the
facility was quicker than I wanted. I was sweating bullets the
whole time. Blue tried to take my mind off of this inevitable
meeting the best he could but failed miserably. Parking the truck
Gabriel, shifted in his seat to look at me he brought a hand to the
side of my head cupping my face, I instinctively nuzzled into it. I
didn't need words to tell me how he felt about me I could tell by
the way he looked and touched me. Turning my head, I kissed the
center of his palm Gabriel leaned over the center console bringing
our foreheads together.

“Ready?” He whispered. I let
out a breath not aware that I was holding one in.

“As ready as I’ll ever
be.”

Dr. Charles was waiting for
us inside he immediately looked at me with that certain stare of
his when he saw Gabriel.

“Dr. Charles, this is my
friend Gabriel. Gabriel this is Dr. Charles Parker.” They both
shook hands.

“Nice to meet you, Gabriel I
wasn't aware you would be joining us.”

“Nice to meet you sir,
I—”

“I’m sorry doc, I didn't
know I needed to ask permission, next time I need to take a shit
you want me to give you a call, make sure it’s all
right?”

Apparently, nothing I said
around these two men surprised them. Gabriel shook his head in
laughter and a small smile broke out on Dr. Charles
face.

“This way, we have to check
in.” Responded the doctor. Two guards brought us to a hallway they
asked that I go in alone. Gabriel and Dr. Charles were not aloud to
be in the room with me. Before going inside I hugged Gabriel and
for reasons unbeknownst to me I hugged Dr. Charles. He stiffened as
I hugged him but then hugged me back as he relaxed. A guard opened
the only door in the hallway gesturing me inside. Stepping in the
room I looked around, still not believing I was doing this. In the
middle of the room was a rectangular table, two foldable chairs sat
across from each other. I sat on the one closest to the door. The
room was white with dingy white tile flooring and dingy white
walls. A guard was at the corner opposite of me as one waited
outside the room. I sat there twiddling my thumbs fighting the urge
to vomit. What the fuck, did I agree to?

Moments later the latch to the
door clicked open. In walked a tiny looking thing with long
straight brown hair the orange jump suit she wore was two sizes too
big it ate her small frame up. The guard guided her to the chair as
he unlocked the shackles around her wrists. She sat with a thump
causing me to jerk up. She kept her head low her shoulders slouched
making her look even smaller. I couldn't believe I was here she was
here. Anger simmered in the pit of my stomach. This creature in
front of me ruined my life, ruined my mothers, ruined my ability to
trust, to love, to feel alive. She was the cause of my unforgiving
pain. This tiny little thing gutted my insides the day she killed
my father. Killed. My. Father. Took his life, a life that didn't
deserve to be taken. This worthless piece of skin, decided ‘omg’
was more important than keeping her eyes on the road. But here I
sat, needing to forgive her.
I
needed to forgive
her
to move on. How fucked up was
that? I don't think I'm capable of that Dr. Charles seems to think
so he forgave. His sister was taken from him and yet he
forgave.

Forgiveness.

Can I?

Will I? The jury’s still
out.

“Look at me.” I snapped.
Kimberly winced. Her head slowly lifted eyes creep open. Our eyes
met. Hers were filled with torment, remorse, and misery all balled
up into two hazel eyes. She lifted her hands so she could take her
hair behind her ears and as she did the sleeves ran down to her
elbows exposing her wrists. They were covered with cuts and healed
over scares. Aware that I had seen her wrists, she instantly
dropped her arms to her lap. And there I realized she was going to
suffer for the rest of her life knowing she had taken another
persons life, she was suffering. It brought me no joy,
surprisingly.

“Kimberly, what you did,
destroyed me. Destroyed my mother. But I see that it has destroyed
you too.” I sighed not really knowing what to say next.

“I don’t forgive you…not yet
at least, but I will try.”

Kimberly squeezed her eyes
shut and nodded as silent tears ran down her face. I looked at the
guard signaling him to take her away. He approached her handcuffing
her hands again guiding her towards the door. Before leaving she
turned to look at me and said.

“I’m so sorry.”

Vanessa

Saturday morning Ava
disappeared for most of the day, when she returned she and Aunt
Rose left and didn't return until late that night. Once again,
there was something being hidden. I wasn't entirely sure my parents
even knew what was going on. I didn't ask. Though things were
better between Ava and I she was still holding out on me. Sunday,
Gabriel had invited me out on an early date. I gladly accepted. At
eleven sharp, the doorbell rang. I ran downstairs as mother opened
the front door greeting Gabriel.

“Good morning, Gabriel.”
mother said sweetly.

“Good morning, Mrs. Saint
John, how are you?”

“I’m well, where are you two
off to?” She asked, as I approached Gabriel giving him a quick hug
and a smile.

“I thought we would go
hiking since its nice out considering its November. Then a late
lunch?”

I could sense mother start
to protest when I interrupt her. “That sounds lovely, doesn't it,
Mother?” I said looking at her innocently her lips thinned giving
me a tight smile.

“Yes, lovely.” she repeated.
“Have a good time don't come back too late, Vanessa.” She said my
name in a stern tone I knew not to further push my luck.

“Of course, mother.” I
replied giving her a kiss on the cheek.

Gabriel took me to Cross
Creek trail I hadn't been there since I was little. We took the
trail around the creek making it an easier hike. I’m not a fan of
any physical activities but here with Gabriel alone in the
wilderness, smelling the pines and fresh fall air. I couldn't think
of any other place I’d rather be. These past weeks I had become a
lot more comfortable with him. I still had episodes where I felt
like I was going to hyperventilate but over all it was a lot
easier. As we walked he intertwined his fingers with mine looking
up at him he holds my hand up to his mouth and kisses my knuckles.
I tremble as his lips make contact with my skin it brings a faint
spread of crimson over my cheeks.

“I love that about you.” He
said.

“What?” I asked, looking
onto Cross Creek.

“The way you blush over the
simplest things.”

“Oh, well I’m not
experienced. You're the first boy I’ve ever held hands with. That’s
if you don't count Declan or my dad.”

Gabriel chuckled. “I’m not
very experienced either, so don't feel bad. It’s a good thing, you
make me feel like a hero every time you react to me that way.” His
voice becomes slightly lower while he slowly comes to a stop to
face me. My heart starts to pound into my mouth I feel my palms
getting sweaty. It takes me a second to find my words.

“So, you've never…?” I
cleared my throat.

“Uh, yeah…I’ve had sex but
only with one person and it was unplanned and unexpected to say the
least.” He said, looking terribly uncomfortable. It surprised me
because I mean he's Gabriel Mason, the hottest guy in Eagle
Academy. I assumed it was Katy, but I didn't ask him because really
it’s none of my business.

“Vanessa?” He asked,
breaking me of my thoughts.

“Yeah?”

Gabriel cleared his throat.
“Vanessa, I really, really like you. A little too much I think it’s
kind of confusing and I’m not used to feeling this way. I feel
torn, but I just wanted you to know that I like you…a lot.” Before
I could respond or process his words he lowers his face closer to
mine and I freeze. This was it he was about to kiss me. How was I
going to react? I mean I really like him too but was I ready for
this? He did choose the perfect spot for it. It's a beautiful day
in front of a scenic view and he just confessed how much he liked
me but why the admission? Was it because he was trying to persuade
me it was all right to kiss him? Why wouldn't it be all right? He
was my boyfriend and has been “courting” me since the beginning of
the school year. Maybe I’m thinking too much into this. I’m just
nervous. I was about to get kissed by my first boyfriend, my hotter
than hell boyfriend. Nervously, I licked my lips which thinking
back was probably the wrong thing or the right thing to do. This I
assumed gave him the go ahead because before I knew it I felt his
soft lips on mine. I let out a slight whimper that might have been
from fear or pleasure I’m not quite sure. He took that as a good
sign and continued to kiss me lightly and softly. My nervousness
began to ease up making it easier to pucker my lips against his
finally feeling somewhat comfortable enough to kiss him back.
Thankfully, he didn't take the kiss any deeper slowly he pulled
back to look at me.

“That was better than what
I've been fantasizing about.” I instantly blushed tucking my chin
in between my chest.

“You’ve been thinking about
this? Often?” I asked, surprised.

“I might be a good guy,
Vanessa, but I'm still a guy and you're beautiful and incredibly
sexy—and the fact that you're looking at me like I have two heads
makes you even hotter. You have no idea how attractive you are, do
you?” I have no idea how to respond to that, but I decide since
he's complementing me I should thank him. Mother always said how
classless it was to contradict a compliment when given especially
if it was a man giving it.

“Thank you.” I said blushing
brighter than ever. Gabriel smiled.

“Are you ready to go eat?”
He asked. I nodded yes. He cupped my face with one hand before
planting a soft peck on my lips.

“Yup, way better than in my
dreams.”

Ava

Going back to school on Monday
was a little strange I hadn't noticed a difference in me since
Saturday, but Mallory said my face looked less
bitchy.
The week went by as usual
everyone was excited about the following Saturday it was homecoming
week and there would be a dance after the wrestling meet. Gabriel
and I started talking again but this time solely as friends. He’d
asked Vanessa to be his date for the dance of course and Talon was
going with Mallory.

“Come with us.” Mallory
said, taking a sip from her water bottle then placing it on the
lunch table.