Kisses to Remember (23 page)

He peeked out one of the barn windows. Johanna and Kam were sitting at the picnic table. Both of them wore glum expressions on their faces as Johanna talked. He’d give them their time, then he’d spend the rest of the evening making sure all Johanna did was smile.

Smile and maybe shout his name a few times.

Johanna grabbed her glass of wine and stepped onto the porch where Holden sat with a beer. Miles scooted out of the house and bolted off in pursuit of something rustling in the bushes. She thought of calling the dog back, but let him have his fun instead. He had been cooped up in the basement for the afternoon because one of Kam’s friends was terrified of dogs. As if Miles would ever hurt anyone. That dog was the sweetest animal she knew. Ted was always telling her how Miles sucked as a guard dog, but she didn’t care. She hadn’t gotten him for that reason. She’d gotten him to fill the gaping holes in their lives. 

“Kam asleep?” Holden was angled in the corner of the bench, one arm draped over the back as if inviting her to fill the space beside him.

“He’s reading one of the new comic books he got for his birthday.” She gave in and sat on the bench, leaving a little gap between them. “I give him about ten minutes and he’ll be out cold.” She sipped her wine and leaned her head against the house behind her.

“Everything okay?” He left that space between them, but Johanna suddenly didn’t want it anymore.

She shifted closer and his arm automatically dropped to her shoulders. “Yeah, I think it will be.” They sat for a few heartbeats of silence. “Alex doesn’t want us to visit him anymore.”

Holden stopped the lazy circles he was tracing on her shoulder with his fingers. “Did he give a reason why?”

“He was in a fight and didn’t like that Kam had to see him all banged up, but,” she swallowed around the lump in her throat, “I think he just wants Kam and me to get on with things.”

“How do you feel about that?” He put his empty beer bottle on the little patio table beside him and gave her his full attention.

“Part of me feels guilty, though I shouldn’t. Alex was the one who screwed up.” She downed a rather large gulp of wine and recalled how Kam had tried his best not to cry when she explained Dad needed a little time, that they wouldn’t be visiting him for a while. “Another part of me feels like Alex is right.” She looked at Holden. “And I think I’m ready to get on with things.”

She handed her empty wine glass to Holden who set it next to his bottle. Turning to face Holden, she hooked her hand on his shoulder. “What about you? I know you haven’t remembered everything, but—”

Holden didn’t let her finish. Instead, he lowered his mouth to hers and took away everything that had weighed on her today. The lemony flavor of the Sam Adams Summer Ale he had finished mixed with the rich red wine she had enjoyed, making her get drunk on a whole other level. His fingers pulled the clip out of her hair and all the tension in her skull—in her body—was released.

He smoothed his hands over her hair in a gesture not unlike petting, and Johanna was surprised to find she liked it. Lots.

When Holden broke away for a moment, Johanna let out a sound that could only be classified as begging. His husky laugh called to her girl parts, and she sincerely hoped there wouldn’t be too many cobwebs in those neglected areas.

“Let’s go inside. I don’t want the mosquitoes to take advantage of our naked bodies,” Holden whispered.

He stood and offered Johanna his hand. After pulling her to her feet, he said, “I know I said I wanted to wait until I fully remembered who I am, but that might never happen. In the meantime, I like this guy.” He pointed to himself.

“I like this guy too.” Johanna leaned into him and caught his mouth with hers. Holy Hell, he tasted good. The slight beard around his luscious lips tickled her chin, and the way his pupils had gone ginormous made his eyes bewitching.

“Then let’s both get on with things, shall we?” He opened the porch door.

“Let’s,” Johanna said. “Miles!”

The dog galloped past her from the shadows in the yard and ran into the house. She followed him and loved that Holden was right behind her.

Ted’s loud snoring shook the guestroom, and Kam’s light was off, but Johanna pointed to the basement door. She knew it to be pretty soundproof down there and something about taking Holden to a bedroom she had shared with Alex didn’t seem right. The basement would be neutral turf.

She crept down the stairs as if she were a teenager sneaking Holden in for the night.
Silly, you’re a grown, unattached woman
. She had a night of amazing sex coming to her and damned if she was going to feel guilty about it. Holden wasn’t some dude she’d picked up in a bar. He wasn’t just a penis in a pair of jeans that highlighted his incredible ass.

No, he
meant
something to her. That thought caused her to stumble on the last step, but Holden caught her arm before she fell.

“Can someone not handle her wine?” he teased.

She pulled him toward the couch. “I can handle my wine.” Sitting on the edge of the sectional, she let the leather mold to her body. “Want to see what else I can handle?” She arched an eyebrow and called Holden to her with a single finger.

He lowered to her, slowly crawling from her feet up to her knees and to her hips where he slid his hand under her T-shirt and pressed it to her bare stomach. His palm was hot and rough, but Johanna pushed against it, wanting that hand on every part of her. When he eased the shirt up farther, she helped by pulling it over her shoulders and head and throwing it to the floor.

Glad you wore the pretty bra.
She hadn’t meant to wear the silky green one with black lace around the edges, but all her other ones were waiting for their turn in the washing machine. Hurray for being behind on chores!

Holden sat back on his heels, his electric blue gaze combing over her. “God, you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

“Said the amnesiac.” Johanna rolled her eyes. “I’m the only woman you remember seeing.”

He shook his head. “If someone removes my brain, completely reprograms it, and stuffs it back into my skull, I still won’t forget how you look right now.”

He lowered to his elbows, his weight pressing against her bare skin, and Johanna needed him to be naked as well. She worked his T-shirt off and sighed over the chest muscles she had unwrapped.

“This is like Christmas,” she said. “Too bad I plan on being naughty.”

****

He wasn’t lying. Johanna was exquisite. The more clothes he took off her, the more certain he was that no one on the planet could ever compare to her. Her body was lean, toned, silky soft, and for the moment, all his.

Holden wondered exactly how many times he had done…this. And with who? Had he loved them? Had they loved him? Did he love Johanna? He shook his head to get rid of the questions. Tonight wasn’t about trying to remember the past or mapping out the future. It was about right now, this moment, and hopefully the next several moments.

He focused on the naked woman beneath him as she unzipped his jeans and peeled them away from his waist. She sat up to tug the pants off his hips, and he lifted to his knees so she could keep lowering. When the jeans pooled at the bend in his legs, Johanna went for his boxers. The fact that she wanted to get him naked was its own turn-on. When she grinned at his arousal, he nearly lost his control.

Her smooth fingertips brushed along his abs, making his muscles constrict. When she pressed her lips to his chest and forged an expedition up as far as she could reach, he helped by lowering until their lips met.

“Now,” she whispered against his mouth.

He shrugged out of the rest of his clothes and slid himself along her body until they were both lying down on the couch. How he wished they could have been at some fancy hotel in San Francisco, maybe the Ritz-Carlton, where he and Vaughn stayed once.

He ripped his mouth from Johanna’s, and she let out a little yelp.

“What’s the matter?” Her voice was breathy, and Holden almost forgot what he had remembered.

“I remembered a trip to San Francisco with the other pilot. His name is…was Vaughn Bennett, and to answer Kam’s question back on my first day with you guys, yes, the other pilot must have been my buddy if I was in California with him.” Only he couldn’t quite picture Vaughn’s face.

Johanna put her palm to Holden’s cheek. “I’m glad you remembered him. I’m also sorry for your loss.”

“Do you know what happened to him? Well, his body, I guess?”

Johanna shook her head. “I only know he didn’t make it. He was already gone when I got to your plane.”

“The other day, you mentioned calling the doctor who handled me. We should do that.” Why couldn’t he picture what Vaughn looked like? Or remember his phone number or where he lived? Or what kinds of things he did with Vaughn? He was sick of these little tidbits and not getting the full picture.

“You want to call the doctor right now.” Johanna propped herself up on her elbows, her long body stretched out beneath him like a velvety blanket. Red waves cascaded into the valley between her breasts, and Holden wanted to swim in them.

“Good God, no.” He kissed her stomach and moved up to that valley. Pushing her hair aside, he closed his mouth over one of her nipples.

She moaned as her legs wrapped around his waist and pulled him closer.

“There’s only one thing I want to do right now.” Holden hoped to get some answers about Vaughn, but right now he was going to let his battered brain have a rest. He was going to let other body parts take charge.

He caressed Johanna’s other nipple until she squeezed her thighs tighter around his waist. Her female heat called to his arousal, beckoned him to fill her, please her, be one with her.

“Holden, please.” She slid her hands up his arms to his shoulders, then pulled him down to explore his mouth.

He took his own journey around her lips, into the curve of her neck, back to her breasts. Then, when she whispered his name again, he entered her, slowly, making each inch a milestone in the pleasure he hoped to bring her.

She was a snug fit, and he slipped into another dimension entirely when her insides clenched around him, stroking him from all sides, drawing him deeper. She caught his lips again and plunged her tongue into his mouth, mimicking the movements of their lower regions.

Holden had a split second to wonder if a man could die from pleasure before Johanna gripped his back and shuddered in what he hoped was bliss. Their bodies moved in a perfect rhythm as if each knew exactly what the other wanted, needed. Holden couldn’t imagine experiencing such fire with anyone else. He reached his own peak, while Johanna rocked her hips against him still riding the wave.

Collapsing beside her, he nipped at her ear as he released his claim on her. She shifted over to give him more room on the couch, but he didn’t want it. He wanted to be as close to her as possible. Hooking his arm around her waist, he tucked her against him. Her hip fit just above his own as if they were adjoining puzzle pieces. He draped a leg over hers, and she put her leg over that.

“A human pretzel.” She kissed his cheek and played with his hair as he scooted lower and rested his head on her shoulder.

“I bet I love pretzels.” He reached an arm out, pulled a quilt off the back of the couch, and draped it over them.

“Are pretzels anything like chips?” Johanna asked. “You know, you can’t just eat one?”

“Oh, you are being naughty tonight.”

She giggled when he turned them so she was on top of him. Looking up into her face, he batted at the ends of her hair dangling over him. She collected it all and pulled it to one side so it poured over her left shoulder.

“I don’t feel naughty though,” she said. “I feel nice. So nice. Because of you, Holden.”

“I feel nice too.” He took her hand and kissed her fingers one at a time. “If I had to crash a plane, I’m glad it was in your field.”

“Yeah, imagine if you crashed in Michelle Darren’s field.” Johanna let out a soft squeal when Holden sat up quickly.

“She would have killed me with walnut brownies long before we got naked.”

Johanna slapped him lightly on the chest but surrendered when he feasted on her lips.

A guy could do this every night
, he thought.
Make love to a beautiful woman, share jokes with her, hold her until the morning came.

Holden wanted to be that guy.

****

Johanna leaned on one elbow as she studied Holden’s profile. Long, dark eyelashes fanned against his smooth cheeks. His amazing lips were slightly parted, lips that had brought her ecstasy last night. Multiple times and in multiple ways. Her girl parts clenched at the memory of having him inside her. She had considered Alex a skilled lover, but Holden…well, he was a freaking genius.

Where had he learned some of those moves?
Did he remember having sex in his past? Or was last night like a “first time” for him? She had thought maybe it was, so she’d given him special attention, which he accepted, but not without attending to her every desire as well. She had never been so thoroughly—and repeatedly—satisfied.