Knots (31 page)

“You told your mother I was coming?”

“I did. When I last talked to her, you didn’t think I was an asshole.” He nodded and put away the bread from breakfast. “She was so excited she got choked up over it.”

“Fine. I’ll think about it. Let me get through today, and then I’ll let you know.” She gulped like she was choking back tears. Her spine slouched as she got up, threw out half of her breakfast and put her dish in the dishwasher.

While Jeanie locked herself in her room, he placed a call to the Finaus.

“Hullo,” Toloa answered the call.

He was grateful she picked up the phone.

“Hi, Toloa, this is Mark—I want to apologize for that shock last night and hope you can forgive me for laying it on you like that. I only wanted to make sure everyone knew what was going on.” He grabbed his keys and waited in the living room for Jeanie to reemerge. “And honestly, it seemed the best way to go about it.”

“Is she okay?” Her rough, choppy breath pounded through the line.

Her concerned voice allowed him to breathe easier. He’d been right all along. They loved her—wouldn’t cut her off. It was her deception they were upset about.

“She’s struggling with what happened, but I told her I’d bring her to your place today so she could spend the day with you and your family while I’m at the office. I’ve gotta work late tonight anyway. I’ll be dropping her off in a half hour if that’s all right with you.” He glanced at Jeanie’s doorway again.

There was nothing but silence coming from that direction.

Every instinct in him said to go in there and check on her, but she’d already voiced her fears before about him breaking into her room when she needed space.

He swallowed down what amounted to an anvil as he waited and watched.

Had he broken her trust so completely she couldn’t bounce back?

God, his chest stung.

No. She was smart, she was strong—she’d see this was the right thing to do. After all, he loved the Finau family, too. He did it to help keep them in her life along with himself. How were they to exist as a couple any other way?

“That’s fine. I planned to be in the garden some today, but she doesn’t have to help me if she doesn’t want to,” Toloa replied.

“I’m sure she’d love to do that. She’s always eager to help her family out.” He smiled at the thought of family—their
own
. Jesus, he needed to keep from thinking about shit like that. Kids—a sensitive topic for Jeanie.

“Yes.” Toloa got choked up and coughed to clear the tarry, sticky emotions out of her throat. “She is very good at helping her family out. And we love her for that. She’s a sweet girl. Always has been.”

“I agree . . . Okay, so I’ll make sure she has some clothes she can work in, and we’ll see you in a little bit. Is there anything I can do so there are no hard feelings in your family toward Jeanie or me?”

“No. They’re fine. Only shocked . . . Marly told me after you left she was sorry she said those things. She likes you, and I think she already knew you were together. Only she didn’t want to admit it.”

“I can understand that.” He paused and looked up because Jeanie had her door opened, and she was standing inside it, staring at him. He smiled at her. She ducked her head and swallowed. No smile, but the frown was gone. “She’ll be there today. Thanks, Toloa. We’ll see you soon.” He ended the call after Toloa said goodbye.

His phone was slipped into his pocket, and he was approaching Jeanie with caution.

“They’re gonna let me come?” she asked, voice timid.

“Yeah. You need to bring some clothes you can get dirty in though if you want to help her garden. That’s her plan for today.” He rested his hand on the door jamb.

Jeanie’s eyes went there immediately, and a look of longing overtook her.

“Come here,” he said, his voice tinged with sadness.

She flew at him, and he wrapped her up in his arms, then swayed with her. “It’s all okay. They’re not mad—only shocked.”

“They think I betrayed them. They have to be mad,” she corrected him.

He stroked her hair and didn’t bother to counter her statement. She’d see soon enough.

“Get what you need. We’re leaving in five minutes,” he told her.

“Everyone will be there?”

“Not Kueili. He’ll be at work, but you’ll see him at dinner. I’ll be working late. I’ll pick you up around seven,” he said, then let go of her.

She went into her room, and drawers were being opened and shut with speed and rough movements as things slammed around. He’d put all her clothes back last night while she was sleeping.

A few moments later, she was behind him at the door to the garage with a grocery bag filled with the clothes she needed.

He grabbed her laptop and carried it out with them as well in case she wanted to work from their place today.

Her breathing was shallow on the ride over, and instead of trying to quell her fears, he let her stew. Odds were she didn’t want to talk. He’d seen her like this before, and he knew when she was shutting down.

When they got to the Finau home, he got out, helped Jeanie from the car and stepped right inside their home.

The door was never locked, and he wanted to prove a point to Jeanie.

She gawked behind him at his rudeness.

“Hey, Toloa, we’re here,” he called out.

Toloa rushed out of the kitchen, flapped her way over to Jeanie and hugged her so tight about the shoulders, it looked like Jeanie might get whiplash at this awkward angle. Jeanie was stiff in her mother-in-law’s arms and was barely patting her back in return.

Mark came up behind them, hugged them both, turning it into a group huddle and then kissed them both on the head, leaving directly after.

No “Bye, see you later,” or “Love you.” He figured Jeanie needed to feel what it would be like to continue hiding their feelings for each other. It was unnatural to do that, and he meant for this to be permanent. She needed to figure out if that was what she wanted as well.

He drove to work, focusing on the things he needed to get done today, rather than dwelling on her.

Those thoughts would no doubt plague him sporadically throughout the day, but he’d do his best to keep them in the back of his mind.

No love texts today.

No phone calls.

This was her day to make decisions and see what her life could be.

A plan formed in his head.

If she stayed the weekend with him, he knew what to do to help drive his point home.

When he parked in his covered spot, the security guard waved at him like he always did.

He stepped out of the car and managed to smile, though his chest was tight and banding his heart like steel girders.

“Hey, howzit?” he said to the Samoan guy in uniform, Apelu.

“It’s hanging,” Apelu replied, smiling and relaxed as usual.

“Nothing to report?” Mark stood at the entrance, waiting for some smart-ass reply to come.

“Heading back home to the big island in a week. Gotta go see my sis. She had another baby.” Apelu gave him the shaka sign, his thumb and pinky extended on his right hand, the rest of his fingers curled into his palm. He shook his hand and head at him, signaling everything was cool.

“Take it easy, brah. Say hi to your braddah for me, and remind him da offer’s still open,” Mark said, smiling.

“Yeah, I told him tons of times. He says he doesn’t want to be no security guard and doesn’t need your help. He’s still givin’ me shit about takin’ your help to get this position.” Apelu went cross-eyed and laughed while he pretended to strangle his brother.

This was exactly why Mark made sure they hired this man. Not only did he remind him of Pono, his buddy, but he was easy to get along with, and his massive size was intimidating as well.

“Don’t work too hard . . .” Apelu called out. “Not good for you. People die from stress or somethin’ like dat.”

Mark laughed, waved, then went inside.

Maybe he needed to show Jeanie how well he fit in with Pono’s family? She wasn’t aware he understood and loved their customs and culture. She’d never seen him there with Pono and how well he integrated.

He sighed, waved at the usual people and went back to his office.

His first appointment was due to arrive in fifteen minutes.

He booted up his computer, went to the small corner table, straightened up the puzzles from yesterday, then checked on the mini fridge to determine if it had some juice boxes and bottled water available.

Next, he made sure the stuffed animals, cars and various toys were in the toy box and the bean bag chairs were fluffed up. Couldn’t have a saggy bean bag.

He smiled as he stared out the window.

Lindsey was early with her daughter, Ashlen. The little girl’s blonde, curly head bounced along as they made their way through the parking lot.

God, he loved his job.

The minute they were inside his door, he greeted the little girl with a fist bump. She hugged him right after like she always did, and then he shook hands with her mother, Lindsey, putting his other hand on her shoulder, squeezing as he helped her over to a cushioned seat in front of his desk.

Rather than sitting behind his desk, he sat next to her in the other cushioned seat.

Ashlen was already playing with a baby doll and pretending to change its diaper.

“How’s the commercial shoot going?” he asked Lindsey.

“Fine. I told them you didn’t need to be there, but they kept hassling me.” She rolled her eyes.

“You’ve done this so many times already—don’t they know you’re a pro by now?” he said, shaking his head and laughing.

“Apparently not. Such amateurs,” she said, shaking her head now as well. She snorted. “We were early, so I helped get Ashlen ready and everything, and they acted like I was some kind of ogre, spewing green toxic waste from my nostrils. What’s their problem?” She looked over at her daughter, playing contentedly on the ground.

The natural light from the window made her hair look like it was filled with pixie dust.

He smiled. Ashlen loved glitter. She wore it in her hair, on her hands and sometimes on her clothes.

It cracked him up. She was sweet, though, not one of those diva brats.

“What can I do to help? I can definitely be at the shoot today. I planned on working late to help out with this,” he said, setting his palms on his thighs and leaning forward a little.

“Yeah, maybe you should be there after all. I know they’d relax, and if they saw you trusted me I’m sure they’d back off. I don’t know why I got lazy on this one. It works every time.” She threw her hands up in the air, then held them there for a second with her shoulders wrapped up by her neck, like a scarf. “Every stinking time. I bring you on day one and then it goes smoothly the rest of the time. How do you do that, and why did I think we could skip that step this time?”

“I don’t know . . . Confidence, and you deserve to be self-assured. You’ve done an amazing job of raising her, so she’s not like a lot of the other kids I see that I refuse to represent. Not once has she been demanding on set, thrown a tantrum or anything, and she’s almost five. Even when she was a baby, doing this, she was always calm. She knew you were there—never leaving her side. It’s admirable the way you’ve managed it all.” He clapped his hand on his leg and stood. “We’ll show them there’s a reason you’re on set and you don’t just leave her there for them to handle. They need you—they just don’t know it yet.” God, those words stung because that was his situation with Jeanie.

She didn’t know she needed him yet.

“You’re right!” She stood and went over to Ashlen, petting her hair. “They haven’t even let her sing. They’re forgetting that’s why
she’s
there.” She gazed at the top of her daughter’s head, then looked back at him. “When are you gonna have one of your own? You’ve known Ashlen since she was a baby, and you were never afraid to hold her, help change her diapers, or anything. You’re so great with kids. What are you waiting for?”

He swallowed lightly and puffed out his cheeks for a moment. What to say? “Need a willing partner, obviously, and so far haven’t found one. I’d love to have a big family someday with tons of kids running around.” His eyes wanted to mist, but he refused to let them.

The only woman he could ever see doing that with was Jeanie.

“You’ll find her soon. I can feel it.” Lindsey put a hand over her heart and sighed as her shoulders slumped. “I know you’ll have that family soon. You’re too good a man to not have that.” She inhaled quickly, and then her face lit up.

Oh no!
Not
that.

“Hey, you’re not setting me up.” He cut off her thoughts he could see churning in her head.

“No, not that.” She shook her head and laughed. “No one wants that.” Another laugh and a tilt of her head, and she said, “You need to let the next woman you’re interested in see you at work. They’ll melt into a puddle of ovarian goo once they see how well you protect these little guys and girls. You’re the best in the business, and that’s why we chose you. I wasn’t going to let just anyone be Ashlen’s agent. I knew you’d protect her—and you have, every single time without fail. If that doesn’t make a woman beg you to procreate with her, then I don’t know what will.”