Learning to Breathe Again (10 page)

“
Financial ruin, huh? What
will I need to wear?” She scrutinized her jeans and
sweater.

“
Something tight and
slinky.” He winked, laughing when she pulled a hand free and
punched his shoulder. He allowed himself to look her over from head
to toe. “What you’re wearing would be fine.”

“
I have this sudden urge to
go shopping.”

“
I told you, what you have
on works. Why do you need to go shopping?”

“
Because” her cheeks grew
warm and she refused to meet his gaze.

“
Bayleigh?” Women and
clothes, two things that men were never meant to
understand.

“
I want to dress up for
you.” With her chin tucked into her chest, the words were pitched
so low he almost didn’t hear them.

“
Oh.” Anything more
intelligent escaped him. When was the last time a woman wanted to
dress up for him? Not because she wanted him to take her somewhere
fancy, but
for him
?
A weird feeling hit him in his stomach as he studied her bent head.
“Well, let me give you some directions to downtown. There are a lot
of shops around the town square, and Nicole and Stacy are always
going on about them.” The scratch of the pen over the paper seemed
loud in the silence of the room.

“
I wrote my cell number on
there, too. In case you need saving again.” He handed the paper
over to her when he finished and she tucked it into her pocket. She
moved towards the front office and the door. “Think you can find
your way back to my place?” He followed her.

“
I think so, I--oh!” she
stopped and turned without warning and he plowed into her. His arms
came up and wrapped around her, steadying her. Her hands were
trapped between them, her palms flat on his chest. “I’m sorry, I
didn’t realize you were behind me” she tilted her head, the apology
falling away.

Without thinking, he reacted. With her hands
on his chest and the tenderness in her expression as she peered at
him through her eyelashes, he couldn’t help himself. Lowering his
head, he kissed her. She gasped but didn’t try to move or push him
away. His lips covered hers. He wanted to be gentle. But this was
more than the chaste peck she’d given him last night. Tongues were
involved this time.

He stroked her back with his
left hand, his right hand resting beneath her rib cage. He wanted
her closer, wanted to feel her against him. Her hands clenched
against his chest.
Damn, she’s reached her
limit.
Prepared to stop, she surprised him
by pulling him in closer, her hands now fisted in his shirt. He
stroked her tongue with his, retreating, pushing in…a dance as old
as time. And she responded to each movement. Against the hand on
her ribs, he could feel her heart as it raced and his own pulse
sped up. She moaned, or was that him? Hell if he knew, or even
cared at this point.

He needed to put the brakes on now, before he
did something stupid, like sweep everything off the desk and lay
her down. That image should not be in his mind. He broke off the
kiss, resting his forehead on hers. Her breathing was ragged, but
it didn’t have that wheeze it would get with her panic attacks. His
hands rubbed over her back in soothing strokes, enjoying the moment
of holding her in his arms. The occasional car drove by outside,
and the ornate clock on the wall ticked, the sound loud and
obnoxious in the near silence of the outer office. It was just the
two of them for now. He simply held her and waited. Her hands
relaxed and he moved his head so he could see her face.

Her eyes fluttered open, her green orbs soft,
and filled with hope and confusion. He pressed his lips to her
forehead. “Should I apologize?” he questioned.

“
No, if you do, I may have
to do something physical and hurt you,” she breathed out a deep
sigh. “I’m not trying to be a tease” her voice wobbled and she
broke eye contact, as her eyes filled with tears. His arms
tightened, pulling her into his chest.

“
I didn’t think that, and I
wouldn’t. We were both active participants,” his chin settled on
top of her head. The floral scent of her shampoo was wrapping
itself around him and he wanted nothing more than to nuzzle her
neck.

He swallowed hard. “You could accuse me of
teasing you, as well, or worse, trying to get in your pants,” he
pointed out. “And on Monday, you tell Jason, he challenges me to
pistols at dawn, and then Nicole winds up a widow and you hate me
for life,” he deadpanned, getting her to giggle.

“
Never know, she might not
wind up a widow,” she returned.

“
Trust me, I’ve gone
shooting with Jason,” he frowned down at her. She stuck her tongue
out at him and he groaned.

“
Lady, the things I want to
tell you to do with your tongue.”

She gasped and her cheeks flushed.

“
Christ, I’m sorry Bayleigh!
I shouldn’t have said that.” Heat rushed to his own face. What the
hell was wrong with him?

She cleared her throat and stepped back. His
arms dropped, allowing her to step away. “So, I guess I’ll meet you
at your place around, say, five o’clock? To go to dinner?” she
fidgeted with her car keys, the jingling sound grated on his
nerves.

Nerves that were calming down as her words
sunk into his overstimulated brain. She wasn’t running away.

“
Yes. I’ll be home by five
o’clock. Oh the spare key for the back door is under the gnome on
the ledge. Call me if you get into any kind of trouble. Did you
charge your cell phone last night?”

“
Yes, I found my charger. It
had shifted and slid inside of a shoe. My phone has a full battery
today.” She headed for the door. “I’ll see you at five, then,”
smiling over her shoulder, she stepped outside. Her footsteps
tapped out a steady beat down the steps before fading.

Her car’s engine revved in
the parking lot and he moved to the window in time to see her pull
out of the lot.
Shit. Should have gotten
her number.

He stood there, the clock ticking off the
passing seconds, and he wondered if Jason would give him her cell
phone number. Without asking any probing questions. Somehow, he
didn’t think so. And not a can of worms worth opening. Glancing at
his watch, he set an alarm for 3:30 pm and headed for his office.
No way was he going to be late for his date tonight. Now to get
through the next six hours, without reliving the last twenty
minutes in his fantasies all day.

FOLLOWING THE DIRECTIONS HE’D written out for
her, Bayleigh found herself in the town square within minutes of
leaving Jack’s office. She wandered around the square for a bit,
doing some window shopping, getting a feel for the town. The wind
had picked up, the strong gusts bringing the promise of the cold
front. She was glad she’d grabbed her wool coat before leaving
London. Too bad she hadn’t grabbed a few dresses. A simple jade
dress in one window caught her eye. She entered the store and was
able to locate the dress, and the salesclerk walked over to her as
she was studying it on the hanger.

“
We have a dressing room in
the back, if you’d like to try it on.”

“
Oh…thanks,” Bayleigh looked
up from the price tag. “Do you sell shoes, as well?”

“
Oh, yes, we sell
everything!” the clerk laughed. “I don’t recognize you, are you new
to town?”

“
Sort of. I mean, I’m just
visiting my brother.” She followed the clerk back to the
shoes.

“
Sorry. I don’t mean to be
nosy. But I’ve lived here every one of my fifty-eight years, and my
parents lived here their entire lives, and their parents. Well, you
get the picture. I may not know all the names, but I remember
faces.” She studied Bayleigh’s. “And you do look familiar. Who’s
your brother?”

“
Jason Morrow.” Bayleigh bit
back a smile. Typical small towns. She wondered how long it would
be before everyone in town knew she was here now.

“
Oh, how wonderful you came
to visit! Are you staying with Nicole’s family until they get back,
then?”

“
Mm-hmm” she made a
noncommittal sound. Hadn’t Jack said he and Nicole were like
family? She wasn’t sure he’d want the whole town knowing she was
staying at his place. Not that anything was going on between them,
well, not yet. WHOA…where had that thought come from? She sat down
on a bench with a thump.

“
Honey, you ok?” The clerk’s
concerned voice broke through her fog and she shook her
head.

“
I’m fine.” Smiling, she
held up the shoe she still had in her hand. “I like this one.” The
clerk ushered her into a dressing room and within minutes, she’d
tried on the dress and shoes, deciding in an instant to buy both.
The clerk was able to talk her into buy into buying a wrap to go
over the dress, reminding her of the dropping temperatures outside.
Blocking out the endless chatter of the clerk, Bayleigh looked
around the shop while everything was boxed up.

Only two hours after leaving his office, she
was parking her car in front of his house. Alone. She found the
spare key he’d told her about and let herself inside. She giggled
as she lifted the gnome to remove the key. Jack did not strike her
as the garden gnome kind of guy.

Carrying her bags into the living room, she
shut the door, relocking it. The silence unnerved her. Even from
here, she could hear the hum of the refrigerator.

She made her way over to the stereo system
and studied it. With a push of the button she had it on and the
music blaring. Better. Smiling, she recognized the music. So Jack
liked country music. She would have pegged him as a classical kind
of guy.

The framed photographs on the bookshelf next
to the stereo snagged her attention. Jack in a tux, with her
brother, and that must be Nicole. She picked up the frame and
studied the woman. She was radiant, Jason’s arms around her, her
head thrown back, laughing. Setting the frame back down, her gaze
roamed over the remaining pictures. Startled, she realized most of
them were of Jack and Nicole.

Frowning, she moved away and grabbed her
bags, heading for her room. She pulled out the purchases she’d
made, hanging the dress on the closet door. Should she still wear
it? What was up between him and Nicole? Did she trust him? How well
did she know him? What if he…

“
STOP!” She screamed it at
the top of her lungs. Thank God he wasn’t home yet. She buried her
face in her hands. What had that stupid therapist told her to do?
Deep breaths? Check. Not helping much, but she was doing
it.

Trying to get her thoughts under control, she
pulled her backpack over to her and dug her journal and a pen out.
She pressed her lips together as she flipped to an empty page and
then started writing out the very questions that had just been
running through her mind.

It was one of the coping techniques that had
been suggested to her. Write it out, then cross out the ones that
you may already know the answer to, or that may not really matter.
Sometimes, it helped. Sometimes, it triggered a bigger attack. But
it was one of the few that helped get it her thoughts in order.

She wrote for a long time. Her fingers were
cramped by the time she was done, and with a gasp, she realized she
had about a little over ninety minutes before Jack was due
home.

Tossing her book and pen aside, she rushed
into the bathroom. She hadn’t wanted to put any effort into looking
good for a guy in almost three months. Tonight, that was
changing.

She was just finishing with her hair when she
heard a knock on the bedroom door. Butterflies were taking flight
in her stomach. Crossing over to the bedroom door, she swung it
open with a smile. “Hey. I didn’t hear you come home.”

His eyes raked over her. “With the music as
loud as you had it, not surprising.” A wink told her he teasing.
“And you were in the shower.”

“
Oops. I forgot about the
music. It’s a good thing you don’t have neighbors.” Her lips tilted
up as she her own eyes skimmed over him in his navy slacks and
light blue button down dress shirt. His hair was still damp from
his own shower. “You look nice.”

“
You look amazing. You ready
to go?” He held his hand out to her and without hesitating, she put
hers in it and walked down the hall with him. She felt the warmth
in her cheeks as he helped her with her wrap, his hands lingering
on her shoulders. She closed her eyes and breathed in his
scent.