Light to Valhalla (38 page)

“
There was a patrol.
”
Even in darkness the tremor in his hand was obvious
.
“
I—I o
rdered the
m
to…”
He straightened as though remembering where they were
.
“This isn’t the place.
”
Wounded eyes snapped to hers
.
“At home I’ll tell you everything.”

Sup
p
ressing her horror,
Charley
didn’t respond, merely
turn
ed a wary gaze out the window
.

Home?

This morning
Coverstone
House had felt like home in large part b
ecause of her budding relationship with Alex
.
Without his warmth would the manse be little more than a tomb again?    Snow pile
d
along the thin windowpane, cold and hard as the dread settling in her heart
.

Was her husband a cold killer?

*
             
*
             
*

Thirty minutes later, ensconced in the privacy of their suites, Charley perched on a chair watching Alex pace back and forth before the
door in overt agitation
.
“Sit befor
e you wear a hole in the carpet,
”
she invited, extending an arm
.

He turned an expression full of roiling irritation to her
.
“Does your sarcasm know no bounds?”

“I wasn’t being sarcastic, Alex, I’m just tired
.
Sit
.
Please.
”

Alex rolled his eyes but
complied, sprawling in a chair adjacent to hers
.
“Christ what a mess.
”
He washed both hands over his
face before
steeplin
g
them beneath his chin
.
“Two years ago Tobias Witherspoon s
erved under my command, refused to follow orders, and died as a result of
his own stubborn stupidity
.
The incident cost me two promotions and, in short, my military career.”

Charley
rolled her eyes
.
No one would ever accuse Alex of overdramatizing anything
—even a tale of murder
.
She
shook her head
.
“
There must be more to this
.
The general is very angry
.
I saw it in his eyes
and you yourself told me you killed his son
.”

“
The general believes
I
intentionally
shot Tobias
.
Young Witherspoon and I never saw eye to eye
,
you see, and I—I…
pulled the trigger.”

Charley gasped, and nearly toppled from her seat
.
Recovered she said, “Tell me
everything that
happened.”

Alex sighed, massaging his forehead before turning a resigned gaze to her
.
“
I received several reports of battlements being laid to our southern flank
.
I ordered Witherspoon to take a small patrol and scout
.
”
Alex
slumped in his ch
air, defeated
.
“I-it was
dusk,
the kind of half-
light that makes colors and shapes difficult to differentiate,
and
some riders were approaching through the woods
where some enemy
soldiers had been taken prisoner the day before
.
T
he
sentries
called for the riders to identify themselves but
no one ever responded
.
A
man on a huge black gelding came through the trees with a saber in his hand
.
He was wearing a blue coat
,” his voice cracked
.
“I would swear to this day his uniform was blue
.
I could see more riders
silhouetted
against the trees and underbrush
…” his voice trailed off, eyes growi
ng distant and hazy
.
“
I reacted
.
I pulled my sidearm up and fired
.
Once I shot the sentries fired as well
.
Tobias was killed and two other men in his patrol were
badly
wounded.
”
He paused, face thoroughly haunted
.
“
Their uniforms were caked with mud
.
”

“
Which is
why
their coats appeared blue
.
”

He
draped both arms over the side of the chair
as though weak from the tale
.
“I
’ve been accused of murder, Charley
.
Cold blooded murder
.
”

She swallowed around the cotton lump in h
er throat, her
mind racing to keep up.

“God,” he spat, leaning forward, planting his elbows on his knees and scrubbing both palms over his face
.
“Why did those men say nothing?  It makes no sense
.
It has never made any sense.
”

“What did the other patrolman say?”

“That they never heard our calls
.
But they must have
.
Those men must have heard something.”

Charley didn’t know what to say, though she quickly realized Alex was not looking to her for answers… he was searching for them within himself.

“Over and over I’ve run the scene in my mind.
”
The words rushed forth in a torrent of pent up frustrations
.
“There must be something I missed
.
Something that could have been done differently
.
If I’d just waited a few moments longer.
”

Charley reached out, brushing gentle fingers across his arm
.
“Alex
,
it was an accident.”

He shot to his feet
.
“That does not absolve me.
”
He fixed eyes raw and
bleeding from
guilt of the soul on her
.
“An official inquiry cleared me
of wrong doing
, but the doubts and whispers linger
.
General Witherspoon is here
to see to it the whole of Britain sees me for the villain
.
”
He paused for a long moment
.
“
How do I deny the fact when
I scarcely believe
it
myself?
”

“
Alex, you were cleared of wrong doing and you meant Tobias and those other men no harm,” she reasoned
.

“Do you really believe that?”

“Yes, I do,” she replied without hesitation
.

Frustrated Alex raked both hands through his hair
.
“It matters not what the facts are
.
Witherspoon has twisted everything, when this is through the
Coverstone
name will be ruined
.
I
cannot do that to my brothers.
”
Finally he met her gaze
.
“The
ton
can say what they will about me, I could care less about the lot of them, but my brothers are not here to defend the
ir family legacy
.
All of them died with nothing to pass along and I will not have their memories sullied because of my foolishness.”

Charley’s heart threatened to melt all over again
.
Could it be her husband’s concerns were not of selfishness but for his lost family?

“
If you were cleared of wrong doing I don’t see
how the general’s accusations can hurt you.”

“
You know the cruel bite of gossip.”

Yes
.
Y
es
,
she did
.
All too well in
fact
.
“This is
why you’ve been so worried over maintaining appearances.”

“Fat lot of good
that did for me tonight
.
W
hen I saw you with Sidney…
something just snapped.”

“So you were
jealous.”

“Of course I was
jealous
,” he grumbled
.
“
Not that pummeling him did me any favors
.
After that public display of brutality
Witherspoon’s
story
will
seem all the more plausible.”

Alex’s
shoulders slumped forward
,
and
,
truly
,
Charley had never seen him so defeated
.
Part of her longed to go to him, wrap her arms around those broad shoulders
and rock him as one w
ould a child in need of comfort; while another cautioned to hold back
,
and be wary.

“Why did you not tell me of this sooner?”

“I feared you’d leave me,” he said, the answer honest and humble
.
“You
already tried once.”

Touché.

“You
must believe me, Charley, what you saw with Veronica, nothing happened, and
I did not murder Tobias Witherspoon
.
His death was an accident.
”
He looked up to her
,
the wall guarding his emotions crumbling before her
eyes
.
“A horrible,
miserable
accident
.
Lord knows if I could take it all back I would.
”

The silent plea for understanding was near to her undoing
.
Alex
did not reach for her or make any move to stand
.
The next play lay solely in her hands
.
Fidgeting her feet beneath her skirts, Ch
arley ached to believe him, hold
to
wha
t they’d found in each other, b
ut a nasty wheedling of doubt took
firm
root in her mind
.
Did ignoring it make her weak? 
Or perh
aps not weak… but merely human?

“
I understand if you want to leave,
” Alex continued
.
“B
ut
I want you to
s
tay
tonight
.
I want you to stay… for a
lways.
”
The whispered entreaty fell
pained and
broken on her ears, filled with such longing she could not have
stopped
going to him if she tried
.

“Oh, Alex
.
”
She wrapped her arms around him, pulling his head
to her bosom, resting her cheek against the soft law
n
of his hair
.
His arms wound around her and for a long while they simply held each other.

“Witherspoon is responsible for your kidnapping
.
I’d stake my life on it
.
He wants me to know his loss.
”
Finally he drew back
.
“Forgive me whatever happens next, love.”

Rather than respond verbally Charley leaned in and kissed him fiercely
.
For just one more night she would be human
.
One more night she would take his passion,
and
whatever il
lusion of love he offered
.
T
hen in the morning light she would face whatever
ugly
truths
came knocking… and they would come knocking
.
Of that she was certain
.