Tears gathered in her eyes. As his arms were still around her, she hid her face from him by laying her head on his chest. Feeling a wave of tenderness sweep through him, he kissed the top of her head and rubbed his hand on her back in soothing circular motions.
“Have you been feeling ill?” he asked softly.
“That part has passed, thankfully. But I continue to be more emotional than usual.”
“Would you feel well enough to attend a ball with me tonight?”
Pulling back, she looked into his face, her brow furrowed.
“A ball? But Papa . . .”
“Cannot your nurse sit with him?”
“Why this sudden desire to take me to a ball? We have not been out together these three years, at least.”
“I think we deserve to celebrate.” He looked over her form. “Before you appear to be increasing.”
“But I do not have a ball gown with me . . .”
“I shall sit with your papa until the nurse arrives. You go home now, and take Martha with you. You can make your preparations there. Sir Winton is escorting Aunt Henrietta and Anabella. We will all take dinner together tonight before the ball.”
Felicity bloomed before him, her cheeks rosy and her eyes sparkling. “That sounds lovely,” she said. “Just let me say good-bye to Papa.”
{ 8 }
F
elicity allowed Martha free rein with her coiffure that evening. Her hair was piled high with tiny pink blossoms from the plum tree interwoven between the curls. In a silk gown with a crossover bodice the color of pomegranates, Felicity felt more elegant than usual. She was exceedingly grateful that the exquisite Elizabeth was in mourning and would not be in attendance.
She really did not know what had possessed Alex to be so insistent that she accompany him this evening, but she was happy. With her husband so inclined to spend the evenings away from her at his club, Felicity had sought out other interests to entertain her. She enjoyed singing and her literary friends, but not nearly as much as she enjoyed attending a ball with Alex. She loved the splendor and formality of such occasions, and her husband was a superb dancer. Most of all, she enjoyed being in his company.
When she went down to dinner, she was happy to greet Sir Winton. Aunt Henrietta and Anabella were both entertaining him, and the three were laughing as Alex stood smiling at their sides. As she walked into the drawing room, her husband came to her side, drew her arm through his and whispered, “You look enchanting, my dear.”
Drawing her over to the others, he said, “Lady Grenville and I have an announcement to make.” Felicity watched his family’s faces as he continued. “We are expecting another child in the autumn.”
Anabella’s eyes grew round as she stared at Felicity. Aunt Henrietta came to them immediately and kissed them both. “Congratulations, my dears! It is high time that Jack acquired some competition for your affections. Otherwise he will become completely spoiled!”
Felicity laughed. “I am afraid he already is. I do not know how he will react when we tell him!”
Alex said, “Aunt Henrietta, you know Jack to be a perfect child. He will be delighted with a sibling.”
“Pray it is a boy,” said Anabella. “Then you will have your spare and the succession will be secure.”
Alex looked down at Felicity and winked. “We have plenty of time left to worry about that. I, myself, would quite like a little girl.”
Felicity felt warmed by his regard. She could not ever recall his having looked at her with such approval.
At dinner, Sir Winton entertained them all with stories of the pranks he and Alex had got up to during their schooldays at Harrow. Anabella laughed merrily and countered with stories from her childhood that included Alex. Aunt Harriet topped them all with accounts of her acts of derring-do with Alex and Anabella’s father when they were children.
“We had no playmate on that vast estate except one another. It is probably for that reason I was a tomboy. We dragged the bales of hay around in the barn to construct a pirate ship. Morris taught me to swordfight. We used stripped tree branches for swords and I became quite accomplished! Morris was compelled to walk the plank on many an occasion. But I was to be vastly disappointed that girls were not permitted to learn fencing in school.”
It was one of those Lambeth discussions from which Felicity always felt excluded. However, she kept the warmth of Alex’s regard and held it to her like a secret.
Later, when they entered the ballroom and were announced as the Earl and Countess of Grenville, Felicity held her head high. She was completely unprepared for the silence that followed the announcement and the looks of surprise upon the faces of the company. Then it struck her.
They all think Elizabeth is Alex’s mistress. They are surprised to see us together at a ball after all the gossip.
The glow in her heart dimmed a bit.
I will show them that he has regard for me!
Turning to her husband, she gave him a wide smile. He put an arm about her waist, his fingers squeezing her side.
When they arrived near the dance floor, the orchestra was playing a waltz. Turning to face her, he bowed. “May I have the honor of this dance, my lady?”
“To be sure,” she replied, extending her hand to him.
Thus commenced a lovely, lively waltz. Never since she had known Alex had they danced so well together. Could he hold her this way, look into her eyes with this tenderness, and be intimately involved with Elizabeth? She admitted to herself that, though she loved him more than ever, she did not really understand him. For the time being, it was heaven just to be in his arms.
She did not lack for partners. Almost every one of them complimented her on her brilliant looks that evening. She was beginning to feel she had truly been accepted by the
ton
as Alex’s wife for the first time since their marriage when Anabella joined her while the orchestra was taking an intermission. Alex, she knew, had adjourned to the card room.
“Well, I would say Sir Winton’s idea worked perfectly!” Alex’s sister said.
“And what idea would that be?” Felicity asked.
“Surely you have realized the gossip surrounding Alex’s visit to Lady Beaton has been very dangerous to her reputation? Men may do what they like, but a woman’s good name is very easily soiled.”
“And Sir Winton’s idea?”
“That Alex should appear with you at this ball tonight, in the guise of adoring spouse. The object being to stop the tongues from carrying tales that his visit to Lady Beaton was anything more than the visit of a friend.”
Somehow Felicity remained standing, though she felt the blood go from her face. Her heart, wide open to love, felt the blow full force.
This whole evening was a charade for Elizabeth’s benefit?
Hands trembling, she said, “Yes, I would say the plan has succeeded admirably.”
Seeing the smirk on Anabella’s face, Felicity tried to muster anger with the woman, but the hurt stabbing her under her ribs was so great, she failed. However, she could not allow the woman to know that. Raising her chin, she said, “Alex and I both abhor gossip of any kind.”
“Oh,” Anabella said, “I see Lady Marjorie Keaton. I have not spoken to her this age. I know you will excuse me.”
As her sister-in-law sailed away, Felicity stayed rooted to the spot, the dancers in their bright silks whirling before her in a blur. The fact that Alex had managed to deceive her so completely, to manipulate her so handily, hurt so badly she did not know how she could face him again. She must get away. Immediately.
Felicity saw Aunt Henrietta walking toward her. Before the woman could reach her, she ducked out onto the terrace. The night was cold and her wrap was inside. She could not go back for it. She could not face the
ton
with tears streaming down her cheeks.
Moving blindly down the dark steps into the garden, she looked desperately for the gate out into the mews. The gravel crunched under her slippers and she began to shiver. Finally, led by the smell of the stables, she located the gate, slid through, walked in the pitch black darkness in the direction of the street, and there was lucky enough to find a hansom cab lit by a torch. Giving her father’s address to the jarvey, she gathered her skirts and climbed inside the welcome confines of the vehicle.
Laying her head on the back of the seat, she took several slow, deep breaths, trying to calm herself. She took a handkerchief from her reticule and wiped her eyes.
Nothing was really any different. Alex loved Elizabeth as he always had. But they would not go on as before. Felicity would live with her father, barring her tender, weary heart from further hurt. Let the gossips say what they would.
Putting her hand over her swelling abdomen, she felt the tears start again.
{ 9 }
A
lex came out of the card room, smiling. He had won a tidy sum at piquet off a skilled crony. Looking around for Felicity, he could not see her. She was very popular tonight. Undoubtedly, she was dancing.
Aunt Henrietta found him as he was pouring himself a glass of punch.
“Felicity has gone,” she told him in a low voice. “She left through the terrace doors without her cloak. She has not returned.”
Stunned, he stared at his aunt. Felicity gone? Without a word? It made no sense. “Perhaps she became ill,” he said at last. “It is very close in here. She must have needed some air. Undoubtedly, she came back in when you were not looking.”
“No, Alex. I was worried. She was as white as a sheet. I went after her. She had disappeared.”
“She must have been ill. Why did she not send for me?” Panic gripped him. Putting down his glass, he said, “There must be something wrong. She is inclined to miscarry. What if she is losing the baby?”
Without excusing himself to his aunt, he moved swiftly to the ballroom’s open doors and out into the hallway. When he reached the street, he did not bother to call for his carriage, but hailed a cab. It seemed an eternity before they reached his house, which was in reality only blocks away.
Could a miscarriage at this late date endanger Felicity’s own life? Had she summoned a doctor? His heart pounded hard in his chest. At last, they arrived and he paid off the jarvey.
Running up his steps, he threw open the door.
“Norse!” he called, moving toward the butler’s pantry. An agitated butler met him in the hall.
“My lord?”
“Her ladyship? Did her ladyship come home?”
“No, my lord. She is not here.”
Cursing, Alex flew across the foyer and out the vestibule. The cab had moved on. Circling the house, he went into the dark mews and straight to Orpheus’s stall. Not bothering
with a saddle, he managed to bridle his horse in the dark, mounted, and guided the stallion out into the dark streets. At a canter, he made his way to Grosvenor Square in the dim light of the street lamps. He clenched his jaw at the continuous vision of Felicity bleeding or in pain.
When he reached his father-in-law’s house, he leapt up the steps and tried to open the door. It was locked for the night. Sounding the knocker, he waited with his last ounce of patience for the door to be answered.
To his surprise, it was Nanny Owen who stood there.
“Nanny? Her ladyship? Is she ill? Is she losing the baby?”
“Losing the baby? Whatever are you talking about?”
He stared at the woman. “Has she not told you she is increasing? Where is she? I must speak to her!” Alex tried to brush past the woman.
“Calm yourself, Lord Grenville. She sent me down to intercept you, should you come. She has retired. She does not wish to see you tonight.”
Puzzled, he tried to make sense of her words. “Retired? She must be ill. Let me pass.” The short, stout woman was no match for him. He galloped up the two flights of stairs and began opening doors, knowing not which one was Felicity’s bedchamber.
Finally, he found her in a room lit only by the fire in the grate. She was curled in a ball under what seemed to be a pile of quilts. Upon hearing the door open, she sat up in one abrupt motion.
“Felicity? Is it the baby? Are you going to lose it? Where is the doctor?”
“The baby?” she asked.
Coming into the room, he knelt by her bedside and took her hands. They were cold, despite the quilts and the fire. Her face looked pale in the firelight.
His wife pulled her hands away. “The baby is quite well, I believe. Not in any danger.”
Relief descended on him in a wave. For a moment, he could not say anything. He got to his feet and paced off the anxiety of the last hour. As it faded, confusion grew. “Was someone unkind to you? Is that why you left in such a hurry? Without telling me?”
For a moment, she did not answer. He heard her take a deep breath. “Although I think the baby is quite well, I was not. It was very close in the ballroom. I felt faint and did not wish to make a scene. I went outside to get a breath of air.” She paused, and he sensed that she was fighting some sort of inner battle. That she was not telling the truth. “Once I felt more myself, I decided to come home. I suddenly was not easy in my mind about Papa.”
He frowned, wondering what had actually taken place. One thing was certain—all the joy they had experienced together earlier in the evening had vanished. “Why did you leave alone? Did you not think we would be concerned about you?”
“It did not occur to me. I am sorry if I gave you a fright. I am, after all, used to going about on my own.”
“Well, you gave me a devilish scare!”
“I am sorry. It never occurred to me you would worry about me.”
Alex felt cold. Walking to the fire, he stood before it, his hands clasped behind his back. “How did you find your father?” he asked.
“He was sleeping. Nurse was able to feed him more jellied broth, however. She said he had been asking for me before he went to sleep.”
“He speaks?”
“Yes. He calls me ‘Flis.’ But I am encouraged.”
Alex resumed his pacing. He had forgotten his original motivations for taking Felicity to the ball. So caught up had he been in the news of the new child, Elizabeth had gone completely out of his mind.