Authors: Cindy Sutherland
Tags: #Gay & Lesbian, #Literature & Fiction, #Fiction, #Gay, #Romance, #Contemporary, #Gay Romance, #Genre Fiction
Patrick stood and walked over to him to set a comforting hand on his shoulder. “He’s right, you know. There’s nothing wrong with being a writer. In fact, I’d assumed that would be the path you’d follow when you were younger. But then the David thing happened….” It was Patrick’s turn to trail off, and Quinn knew he was worried about upsetting him.
“It’s okay, Dad. That’s something else Cian did for me. He made me realize that I deserved better than David and what he did to me. He showed me more love in a few days than David ever showed me in our whole… whatever it was that we had.”
Patrick smiled. “Then I think I like him just because of that. Because he’s right —you deserve the best life has to offer, and that sure as hell wasn’t David McLeod.”
Quinn sighed. “The problem is, I thought I belonged here, helping my family, and that Cian belonged there helping his.” Quinn started pacing again. “He wants to be a vet, and he’d be so great at it, but he feels like he owes his grandfather for taking him in and raising him, so he doesn’t want to leave him to run the farm alone.” He took a deep breath before continuing. “And I think maybe that you all might be able to get along fine without me, and maybe it’s time for me to focus on me and my writing.”
“I want to go back to school, take some courses. I think it’s what I need right now. Something to get me focused.” For a moment, Quinn’s enthusiasm showed through before the sadness took over again.
Quinn shook his head. “No. They have an amazing writing program, and I’d learn a lot about Irish writers and culture there.” He looked up and held his father’s gaze. “I care a lot about Cian, I won’t deny it. I might even be falling in love with him… but this is important to me. It’s the rest of my life, and it’s time I did something with it.”
Quinn’s gaze never wavered. “As sure as I can be. I always wanted to do something that I loved like you love horses. You’ve been so lucky to be able to make a living doing what you love instead of just what makes you the most money.”
Quinn turned and walked to the barn door, looking out over the farm he loved. “We both know I haven’t always had the focus I should have on the future, and you and Mom have tried really hard to let me find my own way.” He turned back to his father. “I finally think that I have.”
Patrick nodded approvingly. “Well, I guess this is as good a time as any to tell you that I got the most interesting e-mail from Davin O’Reilly earlier. He was confirming the rest of the travel arrangements for the horses and just happened to mention his mopey grandson.”
Patrick chuckled as Quinn’s eyes just about bugged out of his head. “Seems the young man has been pining for some American boy he met recently and driving Davin out of his mind, so he thought the best thing for his grandson would be to go to school and become a vet… in Dublin.”
“Really?” Quinn grinned excitedly. “Cian’s really going to school? For real?” At Patrick’s nod, Quinn whooped with glee. “That’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever heard. I’m so happy for him!”
He walked up and hugged his dad hard before pulling back. Something else clicked then. “He’s been pining for me?” He couldn’t keep the hope out of his voice. “Really?”
That stopped Quinn in his tracks. “I don’t know. I know what I want to do….” “So why don’t you?” Patrick’s voice was gentle.
“I don’t want to disappoint you.” Quinn’s voice broke on the last word. “I let
Patrick hugged him close for a second before pulling back and looking in Quinn’s handsome young face. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. You believed in love and it let you down. It happens to all of us.” He reached up and brushed away a tear from his son’s cheek. “The important thing is that it didn’t beat you. And now you’ve found your path. You just need to get on it.”
smiled at his granddad and got out of the truck. The drive up here to register and get settled in his hall was one of the longest of his life, and he didn’t mind admitting he was a little terrified, if only to himself.
It had been a long six months. Two weeks after Quinn left, his grandfather had announced he was sending Cian to school to be a vet and he wasn’t taking no for an answer. He’d spent an hour explaining how Cian wasn’t an indentured servant and that he was allowed to want more of a life than he had.
He’d told Cian in no uncertain terms that he was still more than capable of running his own damned farm, and the hands he hired to help out were the best to be found for a reason. And if Cian had a problem with that, too friggin’ bad!
He also pointed out that Cian training as a vet was something that would only be a benefit to him and to the animals on his farm. Free vet care was one of the perks of having an animal doctor for a grandson.
It hadn’t taken long to persuade Cian this was the right thing to do, but he had to have the answer to one question first. He turned back to look in the open truck window.
His grandfather smiled at him and shook his head. “No… at least, not on purpose. I overheard you in the barn that day. I’m disappointed you didn’t tell me yourself, but I’m glad I found out.”
Cian couldn’t help but think there was something kind of funny about the look on his grandfather’s face, but he got distracted again by thoughts of the future. “Yeah, okay. And thanks.” With a nod, he turned from the truck and headed for the door, enthusiasm and nerves putting a small bounce in his step.
Cian walked into the building and made his way to the registration office. As usual, his thoughts turned to Quinn and how he was doing. Their contact had been spotty at best the last couple of weeks, both of them getting ready to start school. He knew Quinn was really excited, and it made Cian smile every time.
He looked up when someone cleared her throat, and found that he was next. He walked up to the pleasant-looking woman and handed her his paperwork along with his ID. She checked to make sure everything was filled out properly before passing him his schedule. Once that was done, she looked over his shoulder for the next person.
“Well, I don’t have anything here. Perhaps he misplaced it…?” Cian just groaned. “Can’t I fill it out now?”
“Quinn?” Cian’s feet seemed to be moving of their own volition, like he was being pulled into the sun. “What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be starting school next week!”
“Here? There’s no creative writing program here, Quinn….” Cian was getting ready to rant. There was no way Quinn was giving up his dream just he could be with Cian.
Quinn cut him off. “No, there isn’t, you’re right. But there is at Trinity, about twenty minutes away.” He grinned cheekily as he lifted his arms to twine them around Cian’s neck. “It’s actually a really awesome master’s program, and I kind of like the location.”
Cian settled his hands on Quinn’s hips and pulled him closer. He knew that people in the office had to be looking at them, but right now he really didn’t care. “God, I missed you.” He leaned his forehead down to rest on Quinn’s.
“Well, if you want…. I know I’m being presumptuous, but….” He took a deep breath before blurting out, “My grandmother Elizabeth owns an apartment building, and it happens to land almost exactly between our schools. It’s not going to cost us anything—”
“No, you’re not. You’re going to work for it. We have to take care of the building. Interview tenants, do minor repairs, call in service people for the majors ones.” Quinn backed up a little and looked at his feet. “I know you can’t work too much—school’s going to be hard enough—but I thought this way, your grandfather doesn’t have to pay for your housing, and that would make it cheaper for him, and you wouldn’t have to get some crappy part-time job that would interfere with your studies.”
Quinn sighed, and when he looked up, his eyes were sad. “But if you don’t want to, you can have your room here. The lady was just kidding. Your forms are all in order. I mean, if it’s all too much too soon, then say so. I can stay at the apartment alone and you can stay here, and we can be friends or something.”
Quinn looked more brokenhearted than when he’d left the farm that day, and Cian couldn’t take it anymore. He moved forward and wrapped one hand around Quinn’s neck and pulled him in for a desperate kiss before letting him retreat just enough so he could see Quinn’s eyes.
“I don’t want to be friends.”
Quinn gave a squeak of startled laughter. “Huh?”
Cian smiled. “I mean, I don’t want to be just friends. I haven’t been able to get you off my mind since you left. I haven’t dated, haven’t even looked for someone to date. Every time someone hit on me or asked me out, it felt like cheating or something.”
They kissed again, and Cian was vaguely aware of a smattering of applause, but he ignored it. All of a sudden, he was struck by the memory of the weird look on his granddad’s face earlier. “He knew, didn’t he?”
Quinn smiled up at him shyly. “No, it’s not. Home is a little apartment ten minutes from here that’s going to be overflowing with all the stuff our families have sent for us.” He kissed Cian softly and then looked in his eyes. “Home is where you are, Cian O’Reilly. I think I’m falling in love with you, might even be there already. We’ve talked so much in the last six months, I feel like I know you better than I know myself right now.”
“I’m so looking forward to finding out the small details about you. Like do you leave the cap off the toothpaste and what’s your favorite breakfast cereal and what you sleep in when it’s cold outside. I want to know everything about you, and I want you to know everything about me. That’s what home is to me.”
The blush creeping up Quinn’s face said it all.
“He’s already there, isn’t he?” Cian couldn’t keep the foolish grin off his face.