Make Me Stay (12 page)

“Get your fucking hands off her, Rodgers!” I roared, completely forgetting that I was still standing in front of my microphone, that was clearly still on. The whole place went silent. If I could have, I would have shot lasers out my eyes and split Rodgers in two. I had succeeded in getting him to back the fuck off, but now everyone was following my gaze and looking at kitty and Nate. Something in me had snapped. Actually seeing her kiss him had taken me over the edge. Thankfully, the guys came up next to me. I knew how much they cared for her too, and we all stood staring at them.

“Kitty, come on. You’re our mascot not his,” Reece added.

“I thought you loved me,” Trent put in, sounding disheartened.

She stood from her blanket and stalked away, clearly pissed. Nate just sat there, looking like the tool that he was.

“Come on, lover boys,” JJ said to us all, pushing us off the stage.

We took a moment to run back and wave to the fans one last time before we made our way to the backstage area.

“What the hell is with that guy? He’s such a tool,” Reece said, slumping down in a chair.

“She said she loved me,” Trent added, sitting next to Reece in disbelief.

“She doesn’t love you, Trent. She’s a fucking whore just like the rest of them. She’s using you as a chair, getting her kicks from Rodgers and who the fuck knows who else she’s using?” Finishing the rest of my beer, I turned to toss it in the trash can, and that’s when I saw her, eyes a blaze, her mane of hair, wild from blowing in the warm breeze all night.

She walked right up to me. I didn’t move. I was disgusted. She was screwing with me, with all of us, and she didn’t give a fuck. She got toe to toe with me then slapped me across the face.
Fuck, that stings.

“You’re an asshole, Kane Lawson.” That was all she said, before she turned and stalked out of the room.

I stood there silent, like the rest of the guys.
That ungrateful bitch.
Hell, if I was going to let her just leave after slapping the shit out of me. I ran out of the room and down the hall after her. I passed a group of girls going into our room and heard the door slam shut. I didn’t care how many women were freely giving themselves up, I had my sights set and nothing not even a parade of beautiful women were going to stop me. I caught up with her in a dimly lit hallway that ended up being a dead end. I reached for her, needing to explain myself. As my fingers wrapped around her arm I pulled her back to me. “I don’t think so.”

Her face was wet and splotchy, her eyes red. “Go away, Kane!
This
whore is trying to find her way out of here,” she said, shoving my chest with her balled up fists.

“Shit, Kitty, I didn’t mean that. I was just--”

“You were what, Kane, jealous? You’re so selfish. Thanks to you this whole fucking town is speculating what the hell is going on between us,” she ranted, wiping her eyes in frustration.

“I don’t give a fuck what they think, because there sure as hell isn’t
anything
going on between us. You’ve made sure of that,” I said through a snicker.

“You think this is funny. You think this isn’t hard. Fuck, Kane, I wanted to give into you that first night. I wanted to lose myself in you. I wanted to feel you pressed up against me. You think that all just disappeared, vanished? I’ve been going out of my mind trying to stay away from you,” she said, while pushing her hair out of her face.

“Then don’t, don’t stay away,” I challenged her.

She bit her lip, the back of her hand resting on her forehead, as she shook away her feelings. She wouldn’t look at me.

I closed the space between us in that barren hallway. I grabbed her face with my hands and gazed into her dark-blue eyes. Her hands wrapped around my wrists on either side of her face. She bit her bottom lip again and shook her head with a worried frown.

“Fuck it.” She ripped my hands from her face and grabbed my shirt, pulling me down to her with a force that told me she had finally given in.

CHAPTER 21

Caroline

I couldn’t take it anymore. I crashed my lips to his, with a need so strong, it nearly took my breath away. His tongue entered my mouth the same time his hands cupped my ass. He was sweaty from singing on stage for the past hour or so, but I didn’t care. The salty taste of him, mixed with the sweetness of his mouth, was downright wrong. I ran my hands through his hair, loving the way my fingers got lost in its thickness. He was moaning, I was moaning. Everything felt good. His hands explored my body, cupping my breasts. His thumb ran over my hardened nipple. My head fell back in delight. His mouth found my exposed neck. Taking full advantage, he kissed along it and under my ear, sending shivers down my spine.

When he found my mouth again, I reached down and grabbed the hem of his shirt, pulling it up and off in a hurry. He backed me against the wall, framing me with his bare chest and a hand at either side of my face. Reaching out, I ran my hands carefully down his cut chest and over the ripples of his stomach. I pulled on his belt, bringing him closer to me, the grunts and noises he made as we--I--gave in, was music to my ears, my body. I looked up into his blue eyes and saw him, just Kane Lawson.

I worked on his belt as he stood there, watching me. We were both panting heavily by then. I had it undone and was shoving his jeans down around his ankles. As I rose back up, I let my hand graze his thigh. Stopping over his protruding boxers, I slipped my hand inside and grabbed him, before shoving his boxers down as well.

“Fuck, Kitty, you have no idea,” he said, grabbing my dress and hiking it up around my waist in a hurry.

I shimmied out of my underwear, grabbed him around his neck, and jumped up into his arms.

No foreplay needed. He was ready. I was ready. Hell, I had been ready for three months. I slid down on him, hissing in pleasure. Adjusting me against the wall, he thrust into me. Holding onto him for dear life, I sank my teeth into his shoulder to keep from screaming in pleasure.

It wasn’t sensual, it wasn’t graceful, but it was fucking hot, and it was exactly what I needed. Before I knew it, I was ready to combust. The tightening started before I could stop it.

“Kane,” I panted. “Don’t stop, please don’t stop,” I begged, whispering in his ear.

He didn’t stop. If anything, it made him work harder. My hands splayed down his back, feeling his muscles move as he gave me what I asked for.

I squeezed him tighter, as I fell apart around him.

“Fuck, Kitty, I can’t hold on,” he panted as he thrust into me.

Growling in my ear, he leaned me against the wall and moved his hand down between us, rubbing me with every thrust.

I didn’t know how he did it, and I really didn’t care. All I knew was, I found myself growling right along with him as we came together.

We stood there, my arms still tight around him, my lips to his neck, his hand still between us, the other wrapped tightly around my waist, and him still deep within me. I didn’t want to let go. I didn’t want to move, and it seemed he didn’t either. If I moved from this spot, if he withdrew from me, it would be over. That was too intense, too good. All those things added up to danger in my book. It was better than I ever thought it could be and, again, like all the other times, I felt things, saw things, that I still wasn’t ready for. My only hope was that he’d get over it, me.

I finally let him have sex with me. Hopefully, that would be enough in his book. He’d cross me off his list and move on. I needed the asshole Kane back fast, so I could snap back to reality.

With whatever strength he had left, he lifted me up with his hands around my rib cage and off of him. Releasing my tight hold, I let my hands slide down his chest as he placed me on the ground. My dress fell back into place around my legs. He let me go and pulled his boxers and pants back up, only buttoning them, the belt hung to either side and his fly was still down. More sweat escaped his body, putting off a scent that was intoxicatingly delicious. We stood across from one another, silent.
What do you say after something like that?

“Kane, I think we should just...cherish this and move on. It was great but--”

“Shut the fuck up, Kitty. We’re not going to forget this. We
will
cherish it, and we’re going to do it again and again and again,” he said as that wicked grin came across his face.

Why can’t he be an ass about this? I guess I’m going to have to do it.
“No we’re not. I can’t do this with you, Kane,” I said, reaching down to grab my underwear and put them back on.

“What is your problem? You need to tell me, so I can understand, because you’re acting like a lunatic. Are you psychotic or something? You got two personalities, one that hates me and one that wants to fuck my brains out. I don’t get it.”

Grabbing my hair in frustration, I pulled it back out of my face and into a ponytail, resting my hands on my hips when I was done. Then I took a deep breath.

“Hello, anyone in there?” Kane demanded. “We just had fucking amazing sex against a wall, in a hallway and I’d like to know that I’m going to get it again.”

“Kane, I can’t,” I said softly.

“Kitty, I swear to god, if you don’t start talking to me--”

“My mother committed suicide, all right?” I yelled at him to shut him up. I hadn’t said that out loud in over four years. It was still fucking awful.

He stilled and stared at me. “That sucks but what the hell does it have to do with me?” he demanded.

“I don’t want to be like her. I don’t want to follow her path, and I want to do the complete opposite,” I croaked.

“Caroline, you’re not her--”

“Yes, Kane, if I allow myself to go down this road with you, then I’m just like her. I’ll give up everything that makes me, me, and I’ll follow you. I’ll be miserable, you’ll be an ass. I’m terrified of turning into her so much, that I’m walking away from what could possibly be best thing for me. She ruined me. She acted like everything was fine, but she wasn’t, and instead of doing something to change it, she copped the fuck out and took the easy way out, leaving my father and me to pick up the pieces.”

“Are you listening to yourself right now? You. Are. Not your mother, but you
are
copping out--you’re just doing it in a different way.” He was trying to convince me, but I had blinders up and wasn’t paying any attention. “You’re not even going to give this a chance, are you?” he asked, straightening up.

I shook my head. “Give what a chance, Kane? I’m leaving in a month and a half. I have an interview back in New York next week.
You
can’t keep it in your pants.
I
have commitment issues. We’re a fucking mess.”

As I spoke, his face looked like I had tossed a brick at his gut. “You’re leaving? You can’t leave. B needs you here,” he bellowed.

“I haven’t told him yet. Please don’t say anything. I don’t belong here, in a small town. I miss my home. New York is my home. Since my mom betrayed me, it’s been home, and I want to go back.”

“You’re a fucking liar. You’re going to stand there and preach to me about taking the easy way out. New York isn’t your home. It’s where you used to live. Your home--” He paused, taking a step toward me, his hand cupping the back of my neck over my hair. “Your home is here, with B, with the guys, with me. You can deny it all you want, but you know I’m right.”

“I care about you. Is that what you want to hear? Do you want to hear me say that you’re right about everything? ’Cause you are. Let’s give Kane a trophy because he’s figured me out. It doesn’t matter what you say. I’m not changing my mind about this. When I’m kissing you, I see it all--” I paused momentarily, not sure if I even wanted him to know this. It was just going to make things harder. “I just want to have a good time while I’m here. When I move back to New York, you’re not even going to miss me.”

He dropped his hand from around my neck and took a step back.

I hate this.

“All right,” he finally said, crossing his arms.

CHAPTER 22

Kane

“No matter what I say, I’m not going to convince you. I don’t want to ruin whatever it is that we have, so I’m going to back off.”

That tasted so fucking sour.

“Okay, I think this is the best for both of us. We got all the sexual tension out of the way and we can move on.” She was lying again--fuck if she wasn’t a horrible liar. Her nose always scrunched up right after she did. “Will you answer one question, before we put this all behind us?” She bit her bottom lip, her eyes stayed glued to the floor.

“Shoot, Kitty,” I replied.

“Did you really stop sleeping around?” she asked, scrunching her face up.

That question could go one of two ways. The first, I could say yes. I could tell her the truth that I couldn’t get it up for anyone but her. Now, if I answered yes,
she
could react in one of two ways. The first, hopeful that maybe we could make this work. The second, it could frighten her to the point where she didn’t even want to talk to me, and I couldn’t have that.

My second option, lie my ass off. If I did this, it might make her decision to keep her distance, easier for her. She could also be disappointed that I had said I would give it up and basically, I would be proving her point of why we’d never work.

I’d never fallen for a girl before, not like this, not like her. For the first time, I didn’t want to be selfish. I wasn’t thinking about what I’d get in the end. I wanted to make this easier on her. I’d eventually get over her, but I couldn’t take having her upset and terrified that she was like her mother, whether I thought it was crazy or not. So, I did what I thought she wanted me to do, I was that asshole she was always accusing me of, and I lied.

“Come on, Kitty, you believe that?” I asked, winking at her.

Her face brightened as she looked up at me. “I knew he was full of it,” she replied.

“Who told you I was being celibate? Trent, or was it JJ?” I asked.

“It was my father, to be honest.”

I snickered to myself. “No shit.”

“We need to keep this quiet. I don’t want anyone to know that, we...umm...keep your mouth shut, Kane, or I’m going to grease up my vice clips. Get my drift?” she said, clearly threatening my precious balls.