Meant for Love (17 page)

Did she want it to?
Yes
, she thought without a doubt.
Yes, I want it to go beyond the physical
. Seeing him in pain over his mother’s condition had made her hurt, too. She’d felt elated when she had the idea in the middle of the night to help him and his brother at the store. It might not be much, but it was something she could do to relieve their overwhelming burden.
 

Jenny returned to the lighthouse and went straight up to bed. Every muscle in her body was sore and stiff from the sexual gymnastics of the night before. Despite the merciless heat, she slept for a couple of hours and actually felt worse when she woke up.

“If I was looking for proof that I’m not cut out for nonstop sex, here it is,” she said to herself as she sat on the edge of the bed. Shuffling to the bathroom, she decided it wasn’t possible to feel this bad from having too much sex. This felt more like the flu—with an overdose of sex thrown in to make it worse.

She swallowed some painkillers, took a long, cool shower and emerged feeling barely human. The thought of eating made her want to vomit, so she went downstairs for some water and returned to bed.
 

Lying in bed, looking up at the ceiling, Jenny could only hope that Alex didn’t get whatever she seemed to have. That was about the last thing he needed at the moment. Her cell phone rang, and she checked the caller ID, delighted to see her mom’s number.

“Hi there.”

“Hi, honey. How’s it going?”

“I’m actually lying in bed wondering if I might have the flu.”

“Oh, too bad. What’re your symptoms?”

“Achy all over and nauseated.” She didn’t mention the unreasonably sore muscles or the reason for them, even though her mother would probably be delighted to hear that Jenny had found someone special to spend time with.

“That doesn’t sound good. Is it still hot?”

“Crazy hot.”

“I wish I was there to take your temperature and bring you ginger ale the way I used to.”

“I wish you were, too.” Jenny missed her family in North Carolina, but the opportunity to go somewhere new, where no one knew what’d happened to her, had been greatly appealing when she’d read about the Gansett Island lighthouse-keeper job in the newspaper. “What’s going on there?”

Her mom regaled her with news about her sisters and their families, including a funny story about her nephew Tyler being scolded at preschool for kicking his friends with his new boots. “Needless to say, Emma took the boots away from him until he can play nice with his friends,” her mom said of the younger of Jenny’s two sisters.

“Poor Tyler. He loves those boots.”

“I know, but as Emma said, who knew they came with attitude?”

Jenny smiled as she pictured her pintsize nephew with hair so blond it was nearly white. She and Toby had planned to eventually move back to North Carolina after they got their careers off the ground. They’d also hoped to wait a few years to start a family, so their children should’ve been growing up alongside her nieces and nephews.

The sheer unfairness of what had happened to him—and to her—was never far from her mind, especially when she was around her sisters and their families.
 

“Are you and Dad still hoping to come visit?”

“We’d love to. He’s trying to figure out a few things at work, and then I’ll email you some dates.”

“Sounds good.”

“Let me know how you’re feeling, okay?”

“I will. I’ll text you tomorrow.”

“Love you, honey.”

“Love you, too.”

Jenny put down the phone and toyed with the idea of getting up and trying to eat something, but her stomach turned from the idea alone, so she stayed put, dozing intermittently until Syd called later that afternoon.

“Were you sleeping?” Sydney asked.

“I hate to admit that I was. Not feeling too hot. Well, that’s not true. I feel like I’m going to implode I’m so hot, but I might have a fever on top of this miserable heat wave.”

“Ugh, that doesn’t sound like fun.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about. I just feel like shit. But how are you? It was good to see you out last night.”

“It was good to be out. I’m sick of looking at my own four walls.”

“You’re feeling better?”

“Still a little tired and sore, but much better than I was.”

“Glad to hear it. How long do you have to wait to test out the new plumbing?”

Sydney laughed. “Another two weeks, not that Luke is counting down or anything.”

“Aww, poor guy.”

“Poor guy will survive. We’ve been…improvising.”

“I’m sure you have,” Jenny said, amused by her friend. “You know… You two, you give me hope.”

“How so?”

“Seeing you so happy with Luke after all you’ve been through, it makes me believe it could happen to me, too.”

“It will happen for you. I know it will.”

Jenny thought of Alex and what they’d shared the night before. She wanted to tell Sydney about it but hesitated, because if she did, it wouldn’t belong just to them anymore. For now, she wanted to keep it private.
 

“Speaking of things happening for you, Luke ran into Mason yesterday. He said he had a really nice time with you, and he’d like to see you again.”

Jenny cringed and was grateful Sydney couldn’t see her expression. “He’s a great guy, but he’s not the great guy for me.”

“I know you said the jury was still out on Linc—”

“He’s not the great guy for me either.”

“Oh, I was so hoping… You seemed to be having a good time together last night.”

“We did. It’s just, you know, no spark.” Jenny sighed. “I must sound like the biggest princess. You guys have gone to all this trouble to arrange dates for me—”

“Stop,” Syd said gently. “If it’s not there, it’s not there. You’re not eighteen anymore. You know yourself and what you’re looking for. Please don’t feel like you owe us any explanations.”

“Still, I hope you know I appreciate the fix-ups, even if they haven’t worked out the way we hoped.”

“We know that. Let us know when you’re ready to try again. We’ve got other guys in the stable.”

Jenny laughed at the vision of hot guys lined up next to each other in stalls waiting to be found by the right woman. If only it were that easy. “Did I miss anything after I left last night?”

“Oh, you should’ve seen it! Evan played the song he recorded for release from the studio—‘My Amazing Grace.’ He brought Grace up on the stage and sang it to her. I swear, we were all bawling our heads off—no one more so than her.”

“I’m sorry I missed that.”

“It was quite something, and apparently they’ve set a wedding date. January eighteenth in Turks and Caicos.”

“A destination wedding,” Jenny said with a sigh. “How nice.”

“They thought it would be fun to get everyone out of here in the dead of winter.”

“It’s a great idea.”

“We’re getting together here this afternoon to go over the details of Tiffany’s shower. If you feel better, come on over.”

“I will as long as I’m not communicable.”

“Sounds good. Hope to see you.”

“Syd… I just want to say… You and the others have been such a godsend to me. You have no idea.”

“Oh, honey, yes, I do. The people here saved my life in every way that matters, and we love having you as part of our group.”

“Thank you. I hope to see you later.”

“We’ll be here.”

Jenny ended the call and turned on her side, snuggling into her pillow, counting her many blessings. Before she’d come to Gansett, she’d been floundering at home in North Carolina, working for a PR firm and surrounded by well-meaning people who watched her all the time for cracks in the armor.
 

Here, no one had known her before the great tragedy. No one had known Toby. No one had known them together. Though her friends on Gansett knew what had happened, her tragedy didn’t define her relationships here the way it had at home.

She could breathe here, and at some point during her time at the lighthouse, she’d finally healed. The night she’d spent with Alex had shown her she was still capable of emotions she’d thought buried forever. Part of her heart would always be broken over the loss of such a wonderful, beautiful man in the prime of his life. But her life wasn’t over, and her time with Alex had reawakened her desire and her passion and her hope for a second chance. Whether her second chance would be with him or not was yet to be seen, but he’d shown her it was possible to find that connection again.

And she couldn’t wait to see him.

Chapter 10

At times, Maddie McCarthy hated living on an island where she couldn’t get exactly what she wanted when she wanted it. Both the pharmacy and grocery store had been completely sold out of pregnancy tests, so she’d had no choice but to make an appointment with the island’s midwife, Victoria Stevens, to figure out whether or not she was pregnant.
 

Annoying, right?

If she lived anywhere else, she’d already know by now. But if she lived anywhere else, she wouldn’t have met Mac and found the perfect life with the perfect man. Well, he was mostly perfect. He’d been driving her nuts for two days as they waited for her appointment time to arrive.

She’d flat-out refused to allow him to accompany her to the appointment, which had sparked a rather intense argument that she had won.
If
she was pregnant, he’d get to attend enough of the appointments. She was doing this one on her own. And Victoria was running late, which was only adding to Maddie’s annoyance.

David Lawrence emerged from the swinging double doors that led to the exam rooms, escorting an elderly patient to the registration desk. When he’d finished with his patient, he turned and saw her sitting there.

“Hey, Maddie. How are you?”

“I’m good, and you?” She would be eternally and forever grateful to him for saving the life of her darling Hailey, not to mention what he’d done for Janey and P.J.

“Busy as hell, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. What’s the latest on Janey and the baby?”

“P.J. is off the vent and breathing on his own. Janey is feeling stronger every day. They’re hoping to come home in another couple of weeks.”

“That’s great to hear.”

“How’s my friend Daisy?” Maddie asked with a sly grin.

“She’s fantastic. I’ve finally convinced her to move in with me.”

“Oh, that’s so great, David. I’m happy for both of you.”

“I’m pretty happy for us, too.”

“You both deserve every good thing.”

“That’s nice of you to say in light of what you know about me.”

“You and Janey weren’t meant to be,” Maddie said with a shrug. “She was meant for Joe, and I’m starting to believe you were meant for Daisy.”

“I think you might be right.”

Victoria came rushing through the double doors. “Hi, Maddie. I’m so sorry I’m running late. Come on in.”

“I’ll see you later, David.”

“Bye, Maddie.”

As she followed Victoria to an exam room, Maddie could feel the beat of her heart in her throat. It was hilarious to realize that a few short weeks ago, the idea of being pregnant again had been horrifying to her and Mac. But now that the possibility had been dangled before them, all they wanted to hear was that she was pregnant.

“What’s going on? Your appointment was tagged as urgent.”

“I feel silly, but I think I might be pregnant, and there’s not a test to be found on this godforsaken island, so you were my only option.”

“What’re your symptoms?”

“A very brief, less than one-day period that might not have actually been a period, sore boobs, emotions all over the place, cranky as hell, horny as all get-out. Same as the last two times.”

“When was your last real period?”

Maddie rattled off the date.

“And you’ve had unprotected sex since then?”

“Yes. Quite by accident and due to far too many glasses of wine.”

“Ahh,” Victoria said, her eyes lighting up. “I was going to say… I thought you’d decided to wait awhile before you talked about another baby.”

“We had decided to wait, but…” Maddie shrugged and grinned at the pretty midwife. “Shit happens.”

“Yes, it does, and it keeps me very busy.”

They shared a laugh as Victoria made some notes in her laptop. “Let’s do a urine test and a quick exam and see what’s what. Good?”

“Yes, sounds good.” Well, except for the part about the exam, but after two pregnancies, she’d gotten used to the indignities associated with childbearing. Victoria took her to the lab for the blood test and then left her in the exam room to undress. Riddled with nerves, Maddie donned the gown that barely covered her copious breasts and sat on the edge of the exam table.

While she desperately wanted the baby she might not be carrying, the thought of three children under the age of five was daunting, to say the least. Thomas and Hailey were well-behaved, good sleepers and relatively easy kids, but parenthood was a lot of work. It was an all-consuming proposition.