Midnight Squad: The Grim (19 page)

           
“Okay! Truce! Ceasefire!
Parley!”
I gasped. My eyes darted around the room, where was the vampire? I looked back
to the other women. They were all giggling. Oh no! That could only mean…I
turned slowly until I was facing the Penny. She was swinging the cushion over
her head.
“Parley?
We aren’t pirates, and you
certainly aren‘t Johnny Depp” Her cushion struck me in the face, and the impact
knocked me back over the couch where I landed face down in front of the doctor.
I looked up. The doctor was reaching for DD’s cushion. I did my best puppy dog
eyes and begged, “Mercy?” Hoping she’d put a stop to it, but instead she stuck
her arm out.
“Pillow.”
She said it just as if she was
going to ask for a scalpel, and DD handed over her pillow like a first rate
assistant. I was desperate, “What about the Hippocratic oath? You know, first
do no harm.” I hoped that might give her pause.

           
Instead, she calmly stated, “This isn’t harmful. It’s
therapeutic.” She then bopped me on the head. I fell down face first between
her feet. The Doctor actually giggled, “See, I feel better already!” I was face
down into the carpet. I slowly pushed myself up. When I got to my feet,
Alhambra swung for the fences. The cushion’s impact actually knocked me to the
other sofa, and my momentum turned it over. I rolled over and over until I came
to a stop at Katy’s feet. She already had the cushion cocked back for another
blow. “Wait! Wait! Wait! You already hit me! Isn’t once enough?” I’m a grown
man…a soldier trained and battle hardened in warzones where life and death are
just a heartbeat away, and now I’m also the guy getting his ass handed to him
in a pillow fight…and loving it!
    

           
Katy lowered the pillow. I exhaled, finally a reprieve. I
smiled and turned around thinking it was all over. Just then, Elizabeth grunted
with all her might and slammed her cushion against my head. She was bringing
the pillow up again. “Wait! You got your one hit! Everyone got one!” I said
half begging, and trying not to laugh. Elizabeth hammered me again with the
cushion. I fell back onto my butt while she cackled, “What can I say. You’re
like chips. One just isn’t enough!” It was then that I received a ferocious
beating not seen since the LAPD got a hold of Rodney King. The only silver
lining was that it was with cushions instead of nightsticks. Therefore, my ego
took much more punishment than my body did.

           
Finally they stopped, and everyone put the cushions back
so we could watch Dracula. Once it finished Danika made us watch The Notebook.
She said, “It’s a beautiful, and tender movie about the enduring love of two
people.” Wow, just thinking that made my id throw up on my inner child.
Considering how sensitive our resident werewolf is I did my best to try to pretend
I was watching it, but these damn allergies…okay seriously, now I’m lying to
myself. I admit it was a good movie, and I cried like a baby. So I’m prepared
to hand over my man card.

           
Our little witch stood up and said, “I chose…What
did I pick
? Hey, stop laughing it was a while ago. Oh, it
doesn’t really matter. It’s something with Vin Diesel, and anything with Vinny
is great.” DD leaned over, “Katy is kind of a fan of Vin Diesel, and by kind of
I mean restraining orders have been involved.” The scary part is that I’m not
sure whether she’s joking or not. Therefore, we ended up watching Pitch Black.
It wasn’t a bad science fiction flick. I’d seen it before, but I didn’t really
remember it. I think my friend Jack Daniels can take some of the blame, and his
friend Jose Cuervo may have deserved a share of it was well. The best part of
the movie was watching Penny scream and hide her eyes at all the monster parts.
Oddly, our resident neck biter, a woman that drains the blood of her victims,
was afraid of cheesy movie monsters. I tried not to laugh, but a few snickers
escaped. Luckily, Penny was hiding behind a seat cushion, and too distracted to
hear me. Otherwise, I’d probably be the one screaming and hiding.

           
When the movie finished Elizabeth stood up and stretched.
Her necklace was tangled. She started straightening it out when she said,
“Alhambra? What’s your choice?” The Jinn stood up and stalked her way to the
front. “My choice is
Saw
, it reminds me of all the fun
Joseph and I used to have.” Everyone froze in shock as Elizabeth slapped the
Jinn across her face, “Don’t you ever say something like that again. With all
that you’ve done to him you’re lucky we even let you out, but from now on,
you’ll treat him with respect! More importantly, if anything ever happens to
him I’ll hold you personally responsible. If he even gets a paper cut, and
don’t think that we’re not all more than a little suspicious of how he got
shot. Elizabeth turned to me and said, “Sergeant, I apologize for her. I
believe in higher standards for my people.

 
My jaw locked, and my stomach was boiled and
cramped in rage. The only thing keeping me in my seat was the security cameras
mounted around the ceiling. There was a possibility it was just another act for
whoever was watching the cameras. There was also the possibility that whatever
caused her to mutilate herself earlier was causing this. Either way, I couldn’t
just take her words at face value so I forced the rage back down, “Ms. Mann
it’s
ok. What can Alhambra do to me that she hasn’t already
done? She and I are well past the stage of insults and threats. We’re all good.
Of course, it might be nice if she picked a different movie. Maybe she has a
second choice. I tried not to laugh as I caught sight of Penny relaxing her
death grip on a cushion. Clearly, the vampire didn’t do well with monsters and
scary movies because she looked like a person on death row that just had the
governor call and grant clemency.

           
The Jinn seemed to relax, “I would like to choose as my
second choice Royal Wedding with Fred Astaire. He’s just an amazing dancer.”
She emphasized that it was her second choice, but by her expression I got the
feeling she was trying to tell me that Saw wasn’t her first choice at all. Then
again she could be screwing with me. We watched the musical. Fred Astaire was
his usual amazing self. I saw Katy tapping her toe against the ground during
the dance scenes. It was like she was imagining herself dancing beside Old
Freddie there, or maybe she had replaced him with Vin Diesel and just kept the
dance moves. Whatever the situation, she was enjoying the movie. We all were.
We all laughed together, and as a whole it was a good movie.

           
Last, it was my turn. “I choose Blazing Saddles. I really
like Gene Wilder, and besides who doesn’t like a movie that makes a good Hedy
Lamarr joke.” Everyone stared blankly at me, except for the doctor. She finally
said, “You know who Hedy Lamarr was?” She sounded genuinely surprised.

           
“Of course she’s the first woman to be nude in a film
that wasn’t a porno.” The blank stares quickly gave way to snickers. DD finally
laughed, “Anyone here that’s surprised by the fact our Grimmy would know who
the first woman naked on film was raise your hand.” Most of the women never
moved. Katy actually started touching the floor joking, “See how not surprised
I am.” They were all taking similar digs at me when I finally raised my hand up
for them to stop. “I’m a huge Hedy Lamarr fan, but not only because of her
movies. I’m a fan because she helped design the tech that eventually made cell
phones and WIFI possible. Whenever I start to judge someone by appearances, I
try to remember Hedy Lamarr. The woman was beautiful, and when you realize she
was the first actress nude on a real movie, you normally think airhead.
Instead, she was extremely intelligent, and her invention affects us even
today. I think of her life as a lesson about judging people by first
impressions.” Everyone became quiet. It was a little uncomfortable so I tried
to break the ice. “So there’s the lesson thing, and that’s important, but
mostly I’m a fan for the nudity.” I got various reactions ranging from laughter
to mock irritation.

           
We watched Blazing Saddles. Everyone laughed and carried
on. When it finally ended Penny said, “I love Mel Brooks, and Blazing Saddles
is a great film, but I think I’ll stick with Young Frankenstein as my favorite
Mel Brooks film.”

           
“That’s Frank-un-steen.” I joked.

           
“Taffeta darling.”
Penny did her
best Madeline Kahn impersonation.

           
“Taffeta sweetheart.”
I
responded in a very poor Gene Wilder

           
We both laughed, and our eyes met and I felt butterflies
in my stomach. Apparently, it was somewhat obvious because Katy started making
gagging sounds and Danika snorted, “Sheesh! Get a room you two.” I felt the
heat fill my face. I knew I was blushing. I would have been more embarrassed,
but Penny smiled, and I completely forgot about everything else. At this rate
I’m going to just have to shred my man card altogether.

           
I woke to fingers tugging at my elastic strap. “Janine?
What are you doing?” She just smiled. There was a playful gleam in her eyes.
She kept tugging, and finally used her ability to make my underwear pass
through me. You just have to admire a woman with a plan. “Janine?” She slowly
sucked me into her mouth like a piece of spaghetti, and I was halfway into her
mouth before I began to stiffen. What can I say? The woman knows how to give a
wakeup call.

           
Afterwards I took my shower. Janine hung around and
watched me. “Hey, if you want to step in I’ll scrub your back.” The ghost shook
her head, “I’d love to, but the running water would sap every bit of energy I
have. I’ll just enjoy the show thank you very much, and two points. First, one
of the benefits of being a ghost is that I don‘t actually get dirty or sweaty.
Second, unless I make myself solid you can‘t scrub my back. I know you don’t
think anything about it, but just for the record, ghosts really don’t like
being reminded that they aren’t really alive anymore. I’m okay with it because
I spend so much time around you breathers, but if you ran into other ghosts
you’d find they aren’t receptive to being reminded of things they can’t really
enjoy. Things like showers, or eating real food.” I kind of felt a little
insensitive. Janine just made it easy to forget she wasn’t alive. Thankfully,
she was classy enough not to hold any accidental insult against me. In an
effort to make up for it I swung my hips, and did my best to shake what God
gave me as a friendly gesture. Ok, sure, maybe it was a little more than friendly.
Warm water ran down my body. The bruise from the bullet was fading fast. The
other bruise was just reaching its own glory. Janine noticed it and gasped,
“What happened?”

           
“The Jinn and I had a meeting of the minds.” I responded.

           
“It looks more like a meeting of your ass with her foot.
When did it happen?” She questioned. Her voice had a mixture of concern and
playfulness. “It was yesterday, just before movie night, but I’m still trying
to figure a few things out so I haven’t decided just how pissed I should be.
Speaking of which, is there anybody else around here that I haven’t met?” The
ghost shook her head. “No, it’s just us. There used to be more, but we’ve
automated almost everything. Moreover, if we just need workers for something we
can always bring out a few clones. Why?”

           
I closed my eyes and ducked my head under the water. It
felt so good. The hot water soaked away any soreness. Should I tell her, and if
so then how much should I tell her? If I told her then I’d be admitting that I
was less than trusting. It could ruin my professional relationship with my
squad. It could ultimately get me fired. Trust was always essential for a good
team, and if they realized I didn’t trust them I wouldn’t be able to repair the
damage it would cause. The alternative was to bury my head and pretend
everything was ok. That could be even more dangerous. It might even get me
killed. Dying wasn’t an option I was comfortable with, so I had to investigate.

           
Knowing I was going to have to examine my suspicions was
one thing. Bringing Janine into my mess was another. She can’t be killed,
or
should I say she can’t be killed again, but I still
didn’t want to put Janine at risk. However, I couldn’t do this on my own, and I
couldn’t shake the feeling that we were on a clock. As much as I hated the
idea, I would have to put my trust in her.

           
“Janine. You know when I got shot.” I watched the ghost’s
jaw lock. She was angry. The bathroom light flickered. I felt like I was in a
rave for a moment. “Janine calm down! Listen, Alhambra told me she shot me. She
said that she did it to try and save me.”

           
“That
Jinn
is a snake! I knew it
was a bad idea when she joined.” The light bulb popped and went black. “Janine.
I know what she is. I probably know better than any of you, but the messed up
thing is that I think she may have told the truth. We may be in a lot more
trouble than we realize.”

           
I finished rinsing off in the dark. Then after toweling
off, I stepped out of the bathroom. We spent the next forty minutes discussing
what I’d seen. By the time I finished explaining the camera moving, and
Alhambra’s self-mutilation, Janine looked more concerned than I was. When I
finished, she was practically leading the cavalry.