Mine to Fear (6 page)

“
She was nice.”

“
Hopefully, the others are as
well.”

“
Annabelle is great at the very least.
She's the one I'll be spending most of my time with
anyway.”

“
Remember to be really careful about
how you do magic. Some women are aware they can do it, but that
doesn't mean the council will let them.”

“
Of course.”

Will the strides we're trying to make with
these people ever be enough?

***

I'm so focused on Tawny and how she's
taking everything and if she's giving anything away about who she
is or the magic she can do. If only I had her skills when I was
here, maybe I could have taught Cynthia something more useful. It
doesn't matter. It's too late. Cynthia survived and won the
tournament, even if she's now on the run. Thousands of Chardonians
know about her and what she did, too many minds for the
counc
il to erase
.

Mine feels erased. After all my wool
gatheri
ng
, all the servants
are heading off to their duties. One of the other servant girls
shows me my duties for the day and leaves me to clean the study
while she goes off to accomplish her own chores.

I start with dusting the bookshelves,
wishing I could pick up one of the books to read instead of
cleaning them. Being Serena's maid was a lot more exciting than
cleaning all the time. At least I usually had someone to chat with.
I trace my finger down the spine of one of the books. It's
unfamiliar, but the title is interesting. My fingers itch to pick
it up and see if there's something good inside.

“
What are you doing?” A harsh male
voice demands.

I whirl around, my feather duster landing
right on a warlock's chin.

He coughs and smacks it away. “You're
supposed to be cleaning the room, not covering me in dirt.”

“
I didn't know you were standing so
close.” Not much of an apology but true.

“
Excuse me? Did you just make an
excuse instead of doing your job?” Now that he's smacking the dirt
off his face, it easier to see his firm jaw line, golden brown
eyes, and dark hair.

“
Just letting you know why it
happened. I don't usually greet strangers in such
fashion.”

He wipes his face with a handkerchief before
yanking the duster out of my hand. “Neither do I, but for you I'll
make an exception since you haven't learned Chardonian ways. Do not
address me so informally again. I may be a servant, but I'm still a
warlock. You will treat me with the respect I deserve. Call me sir
or Master Jack.”

Is he serious? This whiner deserves
absolutely no respect.

“
While you manage to stay in this
position,” the tone of his voice implies it won't be for long, but
Annabelle will surely keep us here as long as we'd like, “you will
defer to me in all things.”

“
All things?” Just who does he think
he is?

“
Are you daft? That's what I just
stated.”

I shouldn't. Oh, I know I shouldn't. But I
just can't help it. “Even picking out which stockings I'm going to
wear for the day?”

For the briefest moment his face transforms,
almost like he's about to smile, but before I've had time to decide
if he really did, his face is an inch from mine, eyes narrowed. “Do
not play games with me, girl.”

The playful spark catches fire, heat flaming
my words. “I'm no girl, unless you're just a boy since we must be
about the same age. Of course, the way you’re throwing a tantrum,
it must be you never grew out of being a spoiled toddler.”

His mouth tightens into a firm, condemning
line. “I won't hesitate hexing you if you step out of line.”

Though he doesn't move, it feels as if his
weight is pressing into me, forcing me to back off. I refuse to
budge, staring him down. Would Annabelle and the Councilman allow
him such liberties? I doubt they'd be happy about it, but I've
often been surprised in this country. No matter. It's a known fact
now that women do magic. If he tries anything, he's going to get a
surprise blasted back in his face that will have him ruing the day
he ever looked my way.

Finally, he eases from my space, slowly
though, like he wants his threat to linger long after he's gone.
There's a threat that will linger all right. The threat of me
hexing his hair purple and his nose and ear hair to grow to his
shoulders.

When he's several feet from me, I feel like
I can breathe again. Only the air isn't cool enough to douse my
anger.

“
Return to your work. When you're
finished, go scrub the toilets and remember your place.” He strides
toward the door.

“
You're only a servant, too. Like you
have room to talk about remembering my place.”

He swings toward me, eyes wild, and my
magic pounds through me. “I am a Chardonian warlock. I may be
working to keep my family out of debt, but I am nothing,
nothing
, like you.”

Before I can give another flip response, he
stomps off. My magic still pounds through me like boulders falling
from a cliff. What a jerk.

“
And keep your hands off those books,”
he yells over his shoulder. “Chardonian women only read the Woman's
Canon. While you're here, you will do the same.”

Double jerk.

He stalks from the room, leaving clouds of
anger in his wake. I don't know whose are bigger, mine or his.

As soon as he's gone, I let a firework spell
fly, having enough presence of mind to keep it the size of an
apple. If only I could direct it at him. Zade isn't the only one in
our family with a temper. It's only unfortunate I kept a tight lid
on it instead of fully letting it out to teach that jerk how women
really can behave. Stuck in the middle of a temper tantrum is
enough to get me in trouble. Though I suppose hitting him with the
spell would have been worse. That would have been a fantastic
report for my first day of work.

I return to dusting, walking around like all
the books are fake and don't need special treatment anyway. It
doesn't last long. Even if that brute can't treat me with the
respect I deserve, I can treat these books better. I'll just have
to pretend they're all about math so I'm not tempted to open them
again.

It's not until several minutes later
when I've almost finished the room, I realize he threatened to hex
me. But even though he seemed past ready to do so, he didn't. Most
Chardonian men have no such problem. A woman looking at them is
enough of an excuse to hex them, especially ones so clearly rooted
in their own superiority. I stare out the now empty
doorw
ay
. So why didn't he
hex
me
?

“
H
ow was your
first day?” Tawny asks.

“
How was yours?” I reply, hoping the
evasive tactic works. Not only am I still confused by the incident
with the brute, but I'm fuming from scrubbing toilets the rest of
the day. I thought I was grateful for them yesterday, but that's
been over-trodden by the plethora of toilets.
Disgusting
.

“
Annabelle is really sweet. I like her
a lot. She's going to be so much fun to work with. I always heard
Chardonian women wear only dresses, but her wardrobe varies as much
as the topics she likes to discuss.”

“
Cynthia and Annabelle are the only
women in Chardonia I'm aware of that wear breeches in front of
company. And Annabelle is cautious to only wear them when she's
here, never in front of anyone outside of her closest
friends.”

“
Oh. Well, if that's all she'll wear
them for, I'm glad she considers me a friend.”

A twinge of jealousy pulls through me, but
it's not of use to anyone. I was the one who chose it to be this
way. If I was not working with Tawny and Annabelle, there would be
a lot fewer people I could influence. This way I have more
opportunities, even if it means dealing with warlock scum like
Jack. Unless of course, he keeps me scrubbing toilets all the
time.

“
You never answered my question. How
was your first day?”

With Jack still lingering in my thoughts,
it's hard to think of a decent lie. “It was a day.”

“
That bad?”

I puff my pillow. “I'm sure things will go
smoother tomorrow.”

***

I gather sheets and head for the laundry
room. These people really need to get more appliances. Their lives
would be so much simpler. At least I'm not scrubbing toilets today,
though the laundry room is steaming in a way that's almost worse
than cleaning toilets.

“
Are those from an extra room?” Jack
startles me.

I jump, dropping the sheets.

“
Perfect. At least they haven't been
cleaned yet.” I bend down to gather them together before looking
up. Sarcasm can't help but lace my words. “I'm so sorry,
sir
. These will be cleaned as soon
as I pick them off the floor from where I dropped them after you
scared me. And yes, they're from an extra room, the blue
one.”

His eyes tighten, just like they did
yesterday, and I prepare myself for another lecture. And to
discover how much like a typical Chardonian warlock he is. Will he
attempt to hex me as I suspect he will?

“
Look, about yesterday—”

“
Don't bother. The last thing I need
to add to this day is another one of your
helpful
chats.”

“
Fine. Just keep doing your job.” He
storms off.

Good riddance. By the time I finish
gathering the sheets, guilt is nudging in. It wasn't really his
fault I dropped the sheets. Sure, he could have been louder, but I
could have been more graceful, or at least gracious. It almost
sounded like he was going to apologize before I cut him off.

I grumble at myself all the way to the
laundry room before pasting on a fake smile. No sense being rude to
them as well, especially since these are the very people whose
opinions I'm working on changing.

I spend a few minutes talking with the
other servants in the laundry room, being warm and friendly, even
though all I feel like doing is shooting a few rounds at spelled
targets like those Zade is so fond of
.
Pushing that desire aside, the girls seem
friendly enough, so I must be passably convincing.

We talk of mundane things at first,
but it quickly becomes apparent that they have a higher
opini
on
of themselves than
most Chardonian women. They don't cower or lower their heads, even
when a man walks in the room. Annabelle and Daniel have already
done an amazing job with most of them. Maybe there is more hope for
this country than I thought could happen in a short
time.

After giving a merry goodbye, I scoot back
into the hall, heading for the next room I'm to clean. I've gone
far enough that I'm no longer in the main hall and shouldn't have
anyone passing by, when I slouch against the wall.

What am I doing here?

I suppose coming to an Envadi friendly home
should have been my first clue I wouldn't be needed. Maybe I can
find another place where my skills will be more useful while Tawny
stays here.

While I'm still slouched against the wall,
Annabelle comes into view. Peeling myself up, I plaster another
smile on my face before she sees me moping.

“
Waverly. Just who I was looking
for.”

My smile feels more genuine. “Glad we could
bump into each other then. What can I help you with?”

“
I just wanted to say thank you for
coming. Tawny is a lovely breath of fresh air. I simply adore her
company.”

She does have that effect on people. “She
said she enjoys being with you as well.”

Dimples form as Annabelle's smile grows.
“Are you happy as well? If not, I could find a different position
for you. Something you're more accustomed to.”

Like she needs two lady's maids. Besides, my
thoughts on finding another place were probably correct. I'll just
stay long enough to make Serena's reference of me worthwhile and to
make certain Annabelle knows I'm grateful for this opportunity.

“
Thank you, I'm happy where I
am.”

“
No problems with any of the other
servants?”

Are you kidding me? I want to throw hexes at
Jack every time I see him and, as a rule, I don't cast hexes. “They
are all so welcoming.”

“
Wonderful. We try hard to have a
happy staff that works together.” I'll give her credit for that.
Most of them are genuinely kind. “Most are working off debts, you
know, and Councilman Daniel feels it's important for them to be
able to do so. Yet, we also strive to have people working for us
with attitudes conducive toward working together. Whether a warlock
or not.”

Maybe she knows what a pest Jack is already.
I lie through my teeth. “They certainly are all wonderful.”

“
There’s one other thing I wanted to
mention. I've already spoken with Tawny, but since it's your first
time with us, I thought it would be best if I told you directly.
There's to be a council meeting here tomorrow.” My ears perk up,
and I work to not seem too elated over the possibility. “It would
be best if you let the other servants handle everything since they
are familiar with it. In truth, it would be best if you either
stuck to your own room or came with Tawny and kept me company in my
room. Things with Envado are so tense, I'd hate to see the council
take it out on you two.”