My Life for Yours (12 page)

“Wait outside, G, no one comes in alright?” G nods his head and stands guard at the door. My heart’s racing and my palms are sweaty. I stand at the closed door and take a deep breath before I turn the handle to walk inside.

I step through and see a sight that causes my heart to shatter. Jeremy lying on the bed with a cannula in his arm, his head bandaged around the top, his leg in plaster. His face is a mess of bruises and cuts, he looks so shattered with his ravaged body. His eyes are closed but when I gasp at the sight before me, he opens his one good eye and tries to sit up a little.
 

“Don’t try to sit up.”

“Can I hold you, Darling?”

I walk over to the bed and sit on the edge of it. I look over his body and shake my head. He moves his one good arm so I can lie next to him, so I toe my shoes off and lay next to his beaten frame.

“What happened, Jeremy?”

He brings his arm around my shoulders and moves me so I’m flat with his body. I don’t fight him I just let him feel me. If this is what he needs, considering it’s because of me that he’s in this predicament, I’ll let him have the contact that he’s asking for.

“A little after you left, there was someone at the door and when I went to answer it, I was jabbed with some drug that instantly knocked me out. I woke up in a room, almost like a torture chamber and they kept their faces hidden.”

“Where was your security?” My voice comes out quite clipped and irritated.
 

Jeremy kisses my forehead and with his nose on my skin he takes a huge breath in, just inhaling my scent in.

“God I missed you.” He kisses me again and brings me even tighter against his body. My arm comes up and encircles his waist and I bring my leg up over the thigh of his good leg.

“Where was your security, Jeremy?” My tone’s a little calmer this time.

“I don’t have security, Frankie.” My eyes are closed as Jeremy runs his nose up my jaw towards my ear. “I really missed you,” he kisses me just behind my ear lobe. I let out a small moan as he takes my ear lobe in his mouth. His tongue flicks it as his teeth apply gentle pressure on it. But I snap my eyes open and pull away from him.

“What do you mean you don’t have security?” I just realised what he said.

“I’ve declined it before because I’ve never really wanted it or needed it.”

“What…” It’s at that moment the door flings open and Betsy tries to walk in but G easily restrains her.

“What’s going on, Frankie?” He’s let go of my arm and pushes me away a little.

“She’s not good people, Jeremy.”

“Oh, and I suppose you’re good people? I mean I was taken to be used as leverage against you, that’s not any indication that you’re good, matter of fact that’s a very significant show that you’re not good at all.” He’s quite defensive and angry.

“Fuck you, Senator.” I get up off the bed and put my shoes on. “Fuck you and that damn weak pathetic excuse of a mother who’s standing outside.”

“Leave her out of it. She’s done nothing to you?”

“Shut the hell up. Seeing as you don’t know what the fuck’s flying out of that mouth of yours, I’d be heeding my warnings right about now.” A stand with my hands on my hips.

“Who the hell do you think you are? She’s my mother and you’re…” He breaks off the sentence before he can say something that he may regret. But my Italian blood’s already bubbling over and beginning to make my thoughts not so controlled.

“I’m what, Jeremy? I’m a Mob Boss? I’m no good for you? I’m dangerous? Which one of those do you want to pick? Or is it all of them?” I walk around to the other side of the bed where he can turn and see me with more ease. “Tell me what you think I am?”

Jeremy expels a huge breath and doesn’t say anything. He brings his one good hand up and runs it over his face then through his hair. A few minutes pass where I’m standing in a completely defensive stance and Jeremy lies back rubbing his eyes and his face.

“It’s just.” He stops and breathes a little more. “It’s just that they took me to get to you,” he whispers the last part of the sentence.

“Yes they did. But this is my life, Jeremy.”

“You know what scared me the most, Darling?” He looks up into my eyes and the only feeling I can clearly see from him is agony.
 

“What? Never seeing that hypocritical mother of yours again?”

“The thing that scared the shit out of me, is the fact they got to me so easily and I’m not involved in your lifestyle but you are, and at any stage you can just vanish. Someone can take you away from me and I wouldn’t have the knowledge or the resources to find you if that ever happened, and really that just makes my heart stop beating thinking that you could just disappear.”

What do I say to that?
 

“What?” Is all I can manage to whisper.

“I don’t give a shit about myself, the only thing I care about is you. You being taken from me or you walking away.”

“Jeremy, these instant feelings you have for me is bullshit, they don’t happen, not in the real world.”

“I like you, Frankie, a lot. I don’t love you though, not yet, but it won’t be long before those words are said. And I’m hoping that when I say them to you that you can look me in the eye and say them back, but I also know who you are and you certainly can’t love easily. So I’m willing to sacrifice for you again, even though I’m optimistic I’ll cling to any shred of hope you throw me.”

“Why the fuck put yourself through that? You’re a sexy man who has the world at his feet and you’re willing to risk all of that for a possibility with me. You know what? You’re right. I’m not good, I’ll never be good. I give orders that would give you nightmares. I can destroy anyone with a simple look. Do you understand that? I’m not good; I don’t have a tiny shred of good in me.” My shoulders slump down and for the first time since I can remember, I wish that I wasn’t Frankie DeLuca, Under Ground King Pin.

“I know.”

“I don’t think you do.”

“I get it, Frankie, you’re dangerous and you can get to anyone.”

“Anyone, Jeremy. You need to listen to that word and be comfortable with that. Anyone.” I repeat it slowly for the third time. “Anyone.”

“Am I in danger from you?”

“Not at this stage.”

“Can I be?”

“Depends.”

“On?”

“How much you piss me off.”

“I don’t piss you off, I turn you on,” Jeremy has a mischievous little smile on his beaten up lips.

“You pissed me off yesterday morning before I left your house.”

“But you wouldn’t kill me.” I smirk at him and he sees my lips curve and instantly he breaks out in a smile.
 

“If this is gonna happen, then you need to know a few things,” I gesture between the two of us. Jeremy tries to adjust his position on the bed a little so he can sit up.

“Like what, Darling?”

“Like from now on until I sort a few things out you have either a lot of security around and you can continue living in your house or you have a few security around you and you move into my house.”

“Hmmm. Is that my only option?”

“For now, but once everything’s back to normal you can go back to your own house with only two security guards watching you.”

“Okay, well then I choose option B. I’ll move in with you.”

“The next part’s going to be hard for you to hear and you’re certainly not going to like it.”

“What is it?”

“Your mother can no longer be in your life.”

“Now that’s not going to happen. She’s my mother and she loves me and I love her so you’ll have to work out your issues with that.”

I turn and walk over to the uncomfortable plastic hospital chair that’s in the corner.

“What if I can prove it to you?”

“Impossible,” he shakes his head, not believing my words.

I interlock my fingers and bring them under my chin.

“Whatever your hang up with my mother is, you need to put it aside, Frankie. She’s a good Mom and a good person.”

“I wasn’t going to mention anything and I was going to leave it alone. But with everything that’s been happening, I need to do something and I need you to remain quiet while I talk. Can you do that?”

“I don’t understand.”

“You don’t have to yet, Jeremy. You just need to agree and I’ll do the rest.”

“Okay,” Jeremy furrows his eyebrows together and sighs the word out in a long and worried breath. I get up, walk over to the door and open it. G turns and looks at me as he’s standing guard not allowing anyone inside. I stand to the side indicating to allow Betsy inside.

“Miss DeLuca will see you now,” he says to Betsy in a patronising and degrading voice.

I smile at G’s shit stirring ways.

“I can’t believe that bitch is stopping me from seeing my son.” She shoulder barges G, and I can tell by the roll of his eyes and snigger that he finds her amusing. I allow her access to her son as she fake concerns over him.

“My sweet sweet boy, are you okay? You weren’t hurt too badly were you?”

“Mom I’m……”

“I mean I know it’s because of her,” she snarls out ‘her’ as she throws a look of contempt over her shoulder to me. “We have lawyers, Honey, we can sue her for everything she has.”

“Mom I’m…..”

“Don’t worry, Honey, Mommy will look after everything,” she keeps cutting Jeremy off every time he attempts to say anything. I stand at the foot of the bed and let her keep digging a bigger hole for herself.

“Mom I’m….” Jeremy tries for the third time but of course Betsy doesn’t let him finish.

“I’ll move my things into your house today and I’ll call the Chief of Police and have her arrested for what she’s done to you, she needs to pay Jeremy, she needs to pay us big dollars for being involved.”
 

It’s now that I need to show Jeremy the woman or should I say the rat his mother actually is.

“How much?” I ask as I move around the bed to the other side of Jeremy. Both of them snap their heads up at me but two very different looks appear on their faces.

“What?” Jeremy asks with shock.

“A lot,” says Betsy with a grin knowing full well what I’m asking.

“How much is a lot?” I take Jeremy’s good hand in mine and weave our fingers together.

“Depends what you’re asking for.” She stands from her sitting position and now we’re two alphas in the jungle combating each other but for two very different reasons. She wants money and I want her gone.

“Name your price to leave.”

“What?!” Jeremy shrieks “She’s my mother, she can’t be bought off.”

“Two million,” Betsy’s voice hardens as she doesn’t even acknowledge her son.

“Mom!!” Jeremy pushes up from the bed to attempt to sit up more.

“You’re never to have contact with him again. You’re never to breathe a word about him, and you’re never to be seen at any function with him.”

“Three million,” Betsy ups her requirements and crosses her arms in front of her and gives me her ultimate diva look.
 

“What the fuck’s going on?” Jeremy questions.

My look doesn’t falter and I don’t move my eyes from her.

“I’ll give five, if…”

“Yes?” She eagerly asks as her greedy little eyes light up.

“You repeat the words you told me at the benefit. He needs to hear them.”

“What?” She whispers as she instantly loses the ferocious look she held seconds earlier. “I don’t want to.”

“If I have to repeat my words, you’ll walk out of here with no money and no son because he already knows you’d sell him out for a mere few million.”

Betsy looks at Jeremy then back to me; he’s silently pleading with her to not say the words. I think he knows what she’s going to say, I’ve already heard her words.

“I’m sorry. I don’t love you, I’ve never loved you and I’ve never wanted you.” She doesn’t try to go to him, she doesn’t even look over to him, and she simply drops her eyes to the floor and shuffles on the spot. Jeremy’s fingers are squeezing mine as his eyes are filling with tears.

“You’ve never wanted me?”

Betsy shakes her head, no.

“What was I?”

“A huge mistake, Son.”

“You’ve lost the right to call me that.”

“I only had you because your father was going to leave me.”

“Get out,” Jeremy chokes as the tears that were gathering in his eyes spill over freely. Betsy doesn’t move her feet, instead she stands on the same spot and looks up at me.

“Are you happy, you destroyed the only family he had?”
 

“I’ve never pretended to be someone other than who I am. And yes I’m deliriously happy; now get out, before my men assist you out.”

“My money, I want my money.”

“You’re a fucking idiot if you think I walk around with five million dollars. It’ll be delivered to you, now Betsy,
fuck off
.” I snarl the last two words at her.

Betsy turns to walk away but before she reaches the door, I go and slam my arm up against it, essentially stopping her from leaving.

“I will bring everything and everyone I have access to if I even think you’re sniffing around. I would strongly suggest you leave the country. I hear Albania’s lovely and don’t even think about returning. Are we clear?”

“Yes,” she murmurs.

“Loud enough for Jeremy to hear what his egg donor just said.”

“Yes!” She shouts as she straightens her back and lifts her head in a full pride stance.

“You have nothing to be proud of, Betsy.” I open the door and she pushes past me.

G steps up to the door and looks in at Jeremy who’s crying on the bed then back at me.
 

“Send Marko to get give her five million and have Jason and Lance babysit her to Albania, get her out within 24 hours.” G nods and closes the door leaving me to deal with an emotionally broken Jeremy.

Chapter 17

“Why would she do that? She just tossed me aside like I’ve never mattered to her.”

“Maybe because you never did, Jeremy.”

Jeremy’s head collapses into his hand and he continues to cry, the tears falling from his charcoal eyes are fat and plump and I can tell they’re coming from his soul. His head stays down as I sit in the uncomfortable chair and just wait for him to say something to me. I feel almost a sense of compassion and pity towards him; it’d be difficult to discover that your entire life’s based on a lie of who your role model was. I sit in silence and allow Jeremy to mourn the fissure that’s developed in his heart,
until I’ve had enough.