Nameless Series Boxed Set (35 page)

Mackenzie had
stopped wailing, and her protest had reduced to grumpy whimpers again.  She was
kicking less enthusiastically though, so Seth managed to put on the new diaper
without too much trouble.

“Now then,” Seth
said in satisfaction, holding the infant upright, as if admiring his handiwork.
The diaper looked snug and neat, and Mackenzie’s chubby body was pink from her
bad-tempered exertions. “That’s much better. Now maybe you’ll be happy.”

Mackenzie stared
up at Seth with wide, round eyes, as if she could actually understand what he
was saying. Then she started jerking her tiny body again, and her face crumpled
into new sobs.

Releasing a
textured sigh—of frustration, Erin was sure—Seth laid the infant back down on
the changing table and started to put her sleeper back on.

“Mackenzie,” Seth
said, his voice thicker than usual. “I’m very sorry that you’re so miserable,
but I don’t know what else to do. If you don’t stop crying soon, you’ll be sick
when your mommy gets home. And then she’ll think I can’t take good care of you
and might not let me stay with you again.”

When he’d
finished putting the sleeper on her, Seth picked up Mackenzie and held her
against his chest. Jostled her gently. “Don’t you think you might stop crying
now?”

Erin had been
bombarded with a succession of feelings as she watched this inexplicable scene:
amusement, pity, understanding, affection, and something else that felt warm
and familiar. But, at the sound of Mackenzie’s renewed cries, Erin felt the
irresistible impulse to comfort her daughter. No matter how intrigued she was
about Seth’s interaction with the baby, there was only so much of Mackenzie’s
crying that Erin could take before she did something about it.

She’d been just
about to step into the nursery. But, when she realized that Seth was turning
around, Erin almost jumped, feeling horribly guilty about spying on him.

It was too late,
though. He’d turned toward the door before she’d been able to announce her
presence.

Seth jerked
slightly, obviously taken aback at seeing her there. “You’re home,” he
muttered, as if he weren’t quite sure it was true.

“Yeah,” Erin
said breathlessly, her cheeks flushing in a way that really annoyed her. There
was nothing to be embarrassed about, so why should she feel self-conscious? To
spare Seth’s pride, she added, “I just got here. Has she been fussy?”

“No, she’s been—”
Seth had started to answer her question automatically, with what would
obviously be a lie, but then he gave a huff of dry amusement. “To tell you the
truth, she hasn’t seemed to have a very good time.”

Erin smiled
sympathetically and stepped over to take Mackenzie from him.

Experienced a
ridiculous feeling of security and tenderness as she pulled her daughter close—as
if she’d been gone for weeks instead of a few hours.

“Why haven’t
you been good for your daddy? He might not want to stay with you again.”

Now that Erin
could see his face, she saw that he looked tired and drained and frustrated,
despite his calm façade, but all he did was remark, “You’re back early.”

“Yeah,” Erin said,
not up to going into the specifics of her date. “Is she hungry, do you think?”

Seth shrugged helplessly.
“I don’t know. I gave her a bottle an hour ago, but she didn’t seem to want
very much of it.”

Sighing, Erin
adjusted Mackenzie and glanced at the clock. “Do you mind if I try to feed her
real quick?”

“Sure. I’ll go
sit down and try to recover.”

Chuckling—more
in sympathy than amusement—Erin grabbed a burp cloth and sat down to feed Mackenzie.

As she’d
expected, Mackenzie latched on immediately and started to suck frantically. When
she’d eaten enough, Erin held her upright to burp her. Got spit up on, of
course, all over her good sweater instead of the burp cloth.

Mackenzie had
finally quieted down and grown content, and now her head was lolling drowsily. Erin,
for whom the day had seemed endless, was intensely relieved to see that her
daughter was finally about to go to sleep.

After
readjusting her clothes, Erin stood up and carried Mackenzie into the living
room. Where she found Seth slouching on the sofa, his legs stretched in front
of him and his eyes closed, looking completely wiped out.

He must have
heard her come in, though, because he immediately opened his eyes. “I can’t
remember ever being this tired. How do you manage it for more than a few hours
at a time?”

“She’s not
always so challenging. Sometimes, she’s really sweet and quiet. For instance,
now she’s about to fall asleep.”

Seth stared at
the infant glumly. “How perfectly ironic.”

“If you have
enough energy, would you mind staying for a few minutes so I can change clothes
and wash up? I’d like to hear how things went tonight.”

“Sure,” he
agreed, reaching out for Mackenzie. He looked a little tense when he settled
her into his arms, as if he were afraid she’d start bawling again.

She didn’t,
though. She was nearly asleep, and she merely wriggled a few times, then rested
her head on Seth’s shoulder as her eyes closed tightly again.

“I’ll be right
back,” Erin said softly, hurrying away since she was starting to feel far too
sappy.

She went into
her bedroom and took off her clothes, pulling on a pair of pajama pants, a tank
top, and a hoodie sweatshirt. She didn’t even feel uncomfortable being dressed
that way in front of Seth. She wanted to talk to him for a few minutes before
he left, but she wanted to be comfortable even more.

She went to
wash her face, feeling like she needed to wash away all traces of her date.

It hadn’t been
bad. It just hadn’t felt right.

When she
returned to the living room, she stopped short when she looked toward the
couch.

Seth was still
sprawled out, his expensive clothes wrinkled and eyelids heavy as he stared
down at Mackenzie. Who was sound asleep on his chest.

Erin felt
almost shy as she walked over to settle beside him on the couch, drawing up her
knees.

Seth glanced
over. “It’s seems impossible that this is the same little girl who was
screaming with such outrage earlier this evening.”

Erin smiled and
scooted a little closer to reach over to rub Mackenzie’s back. “It’s amazing
how many personalities she has.”

She suddenly wondered
if she wanted to be this close to Seth.

Then, before she
knew what was happening, he’d lifted his arm and draped it around her, pulling
her body snugly against his side.

She panicked
momentarily, at the weight of his arm on her shoulders and the heat that
radiated off him. Without thinking, she jerked away.

Regretted it
immediately.

Seth didn’t
react dramatically. Just arched an eyebrow at her. “Do you really think I’d
make a move on you with my daughter asleep on my chest?”

“Of course not.
Sorry. I just...sorry.”

Seth gave her a
half-smile. “You’re safe from my advances, at least for the moment. You just
look like you’ve had a very long day.”

She had, and he
was offering comfort she needed. So she let him pull her body against his
again, and she felt secure and very warm as she leaned against him, so close
now she could see Mackenzie’s tiny eyelashes.

“If your day
was anything like the few hours I just spent,” Seth continued, “then I’m
surprised you’re still on your feet.”

Erin snuggled
against him, trying to remember the last time she’d enjoyed this sort of
physical closeness with anyone except her daughter. Glancing up at his face,
she saw that he was gazing down at her—caught a glimpse of something in his
eyes that momentarily terrified her, that seemed to shake the foundations of
her strongholds.

But she pushed
past the uncertainty and focused on what was normal, what was safe. “Was she
really bad this evening?”

“We did pretty
well for the first hour or so. She wasn’t laughing or anything, but she seemed
relatively content. But then it just went downhill. I tried to feed her, give
her the pacifier, walk her up and down the hall, use her toys, talk to her,
play her the CD you said she likes...” His voice trailed off, sounding almost
defeated.

“Sometimes, she
just has to cry,” Erin murmured, breathing in the scent of Seth and of Mackenzie
at the same time. It was a bizarre sort of experience and very unsettling.

“I was hoping
she might somehow recognize that I’m her father and...” Seth paused, as if rethinking
his remark.

Erin looked up
at him again, her hand falling to rest unconsciously on his belly. “She’s going
to love you, Seth. She will. But, believe me, that won’t necessarily stop her
from throwing a fit if she feels like it.”

Settling
against him again, Erin relaxed and watched her sleeping daughter fondly. “Although,
I do believe she’s finally worn herself out at last. So have I.”

She wasn’t
looking at his face, but she was sure that Seth was smiling. “So have I.”

Erin smiled
too. Felt warm and safe and content. Was able to really relax for the first
time all day. Watched Mackenzie’s steady breathing, her little shoulders go up
and down. Up and down. Up and down.

Erin must have
relaxed too much. Because the next thing she was aware of was opening her eyes.

She had fallen
asleep. Practically on top of Seth. Her cheek was pressed up against the side
of his chest, and—to her mortification—she realized she was drooling just a
little. On his very expensive shirt.

Mackenzie was
still sleeping against Seth’s chest, his arm holding the infant securely.

“Oh, God,” Erin
moaned, feeling stiff and embarrassed and still kind of groggy. Wiping her
mouth discreetly, she forced her head up so she could see Seth’s face. “Oh,
God, I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you wake me up?”

 He shrugged
slightly. His motion was hampered by the baby he was holding with one arm and
by Erin’s body, which pressed into his side, trapping his other arm. “You were
tired.”

“But...” she
began, looking over at the clock on the cable box. She’d been asleep for more
than a half-hour. “God, you probably wanted to go home. I’m so sorry. I don’t
know what happened.”

“Erin, it’s
fine. If I’d wanted to leave, I would have woken you up.”

With a soft
groan, Erin relaxed against him. She couldn’t find the energy to pull away
quite yet. “Poor Seth,” she mumbled, not having collected her wits. “Getting
slept on by two people at once. How does it feel to be a mattress?”

She released
the tension in her muscles again, deciding there was no reason to be
embarrassed, deciding she might as well enjoy this peaceful respite from the
stress of the day.

“Believe
me—I’ve suffered through far worse scenarios.” Seth’s voice was light, and dry,
and ironic. But the fingers of the arm that held Mackenzie were shifting
slightly, as if he were caressing the baby.

Then she
started feeling a little uncomfortable again, mostly because she thought Seth
was looking at her.

The truth
was—he wasn’t just a warm, cozy mattress. He was a man. A man who five months
ago had made it clear he was in love with her. A man with whom she’d had sex on
more than one occasion. A man they called the Bulldozer because he was so
relentless in getting what he wanted.

She would be
indulging in the depths of stupidity if she failed to acknowledge him as a
whole man. This soft, tender side of him was only part of the whole.

Self-consciously,
she straightened up, although she didn’t pull away—not wanting to insult or
hurt him.

Seth must have
recognized the shift of mood. He didn’t pull away either, but the weight of his
arm around her became lighter. “How was your date?”

Erin slanted
another look up at him, trying to assess his expression. He wasn’t looking
bristly or possessive, so she replied casually, “It was fine.”

“Why did you
come back early?”

“I was tired. And
the date wasn’t
that
great.”

A smile played
on the corners of Seth’s mouth. “I told you it would be a flop.”

“He was a nice guy.
He was cute and sweet and smart.”

At this, Seth
frowned. “Was he?” His tone had grown ice cold, and Mackenzie squirmed in her
sleep, as if she recognized the chill in his voice. Seth’s tone softened as he
continued, “Then I’m surprised you’re not still out with him.”

Erin made a
noncommittal mumble. It was just too hard to explain it to Seth. Whatever she
said, there was the risk of his taking it the wrong way.

“Erin?” Seth
persisted, shifting beside her. “If your date was acceptable, then why wasn’t
the evening a success?”

Erin’s defenses
were low—too low, more than likely. But she decided she might as well tell him
the truth.

She focused her
eyes on Mackenzie although she could feel Seth’s steady gaze on her face. “Well,
honestly, I guess I’d just rather be here.”

“Damn,” Erin muttered—under her
breath, so Mackenzie wouldn’t hear from across the room. “It’s too tight.” She
couldn’t get the zipper on the skirt all the way up. “Why the heck do I only
own pencil skirts? I was really hoping this one would fit.”

Liz scrutinized
her from where she was sprawled on the bed with Mackenzie in her lap. “It looks
all right to me.”

Erin turned
around, so Liz could see her from the back. An inch of the zipper was hanging
open and the fabric of the skirt was skintight over the curves of her ass.

“Well, maybe
it’s a
little
too tight for mixed company.”

Erin groaned,
undid the zipper, and shimmied out of the skirt. “Why are all of my nice
clothes too tight?” When she saw Liz open her mouth to respond, she hurried on,
“Don’t answer that.”

She turned back
to frown into her closet, wearing her prettiest black bra and panty set and
hoping the right outfit would miraculously appear. “I should have just bought
something new, but that would feel like a defeat. I don’t know why I can’t shed
these last pounds.”

“You look
great. No one cares about a few extra pounds. You had a baby less than six
months ago. It happens. Seth is going to be so ecstatic that you’re actually
going on a date with him that he won’t even notice.”

Erin yanked a
black skirt off a hanger in the back of her closet. “I’ve told you a dozen
times this isn’t a date.”

“Oh. I see. My
mistake.”

“He’s taking me
out to dinner to celebrate my birthday. That’s all.”

“Of course. Makes
perfect sense. Even if your birthday was two weeks ago.”

Erin pulled on
the next skirt—one in the series of seven or eight she’d tried on so far. “He
was out of town on my birthday, which you know perfectly well. Today happened
to be the evening that worked out best for us. We’re friends. Why shouldn’t we
go out to dinner?”

“That’s right. And
why shouldn’t you spend more than a half-hour picking out something to wear for
dinner with a friend?”

Erin had to
admit that Liz had a point. She
was
stressing over her outfit more than
usual. She wasn’t used to going out with Seth, though—even as just a friend.
Until recently, he’d gone out with the most beautiful women in the city. Plus,
a movie actress.

How was she supposed
to compete with that?

“How is this
skirt?” Erin asked in resignation, looking down at herself. The skirt was made
of a soft fabric that draped over her shape without clinging unattractively,
and it flattered her hips before it flared out in a subtly ruffled hem just
above her knees.

“That’s the one.
It’s gorgeous. Very sexy.” When Erin moaned into her hands, Liz’s brows drew
together. “What’s the matter? You look fabulous in it.”

Erin answered
in an anguished wail. “It’s a
maternity
skirt.” She pulled at the
elastic waistband to show how much it would stretch. “Is it obvious?”

Liz was
laughing so hard she was having trouble holding Mackenzie steady. The baby
found the whole situation hysterical herself and giggled in response.

Erin just
watched them with a long-suffering frown until Liz finally restrained her
hilarity.

“It looks like
a normal skirt,” Liz assured her. “Just don’t pull at it like that. And make
sure your top is long enough to cover the waistband.”

Feeling a
little better, Erin peered at herself in the mirror. She was pretty sure Liz
was right. The skirt was well made, and she didn’t think anyone would be able
to tell it was maternity unless she actually stretched out the fabric to show
them.

Erin already
knew what top she was going to wear. She’d bought it a couple of weeks ago—a
splurge she’d only allowed herself because it was her birthday. So Erin found
the blue cashmere sweater with a scooped neck and fitted shape. It had been
ridiculously expensive, but she hadn’t been able to resist after she’d tried it
on.

When she pulled
the sweater over her head, she stared at herself in the mirror. Thought she
looked damned good, even wearing a maternity skirt.

“Gorgeous,” Liz
told her. “Seth is going to—”

“Liz.”

“Well, he is.”

“We’re going to
dinner as friends.” Erin checked her hair and makeup. “Why won’t anyone believe
that?”

 “Because it’s
ridiculous. I understand that you’re not in love with him, but—I’m sorry—y’all
are way more than just friends.”

“We’ve gotten
closer, yes. But that’s mostly because of the pumpkin. It’s not like we’re soul
mates or spill our guts or anything. We get along well. We have a child
together. And maybe we have a little chemistry.”

“And he’s in
love with you.”

Making a face, Erin
hunted through her closet for a pair of shoes. “Well, he
was
. He hasn’t
said a word about that recently, so for all I know he’s changed his mind.”

When Erin
turned back toward the bed, she saw Liz shooting her an exasperated look.

“I’m serious,” Erin
continued. “He and I don’t have sweet, intimate chats. We talk about Mackenzie.
We talk about things that happen. We talk about work. The only time he’s ever
really opened up to me was at the hospital.”

“Well, do you
blame him for not trying again?”

“Of course not.
I’m not complaining. I’m just telling you how it is. If he still has feelings
for me, he’s keeping them pretty well hidden. Which I, for one, really
appreciate. We have enough to deal with trying to be parents, without worrying
about
romance
on top of everything else.”

“You say romance
like it’s a bad word.”

“That’s because
most of the time it is.” Erin slipped on a pair of black heels and tried to
decide whether the added height to her legs was worth the discomfort. “Think
about who you’re talking to. I’m the poster-child for being stupid about
romance with Marcus. Having a baby hasn’t changed everything. I’m a realist now,
remember?”

Liz was giving
her a very strange look, but all she said was, “Yeah. I remember.”

Erin kicked off
the pumps and found another pair of black shoes with chunkier heels. “Now,” she
explained seriously. “When Seth comes, you have to go open the door. And, if
he’s wearing anything too dressy or too casual for this outfit, then you have
to run in here and tell me, so I can change clothes real quick.”

Bursting into
laughter again, Liz replied, “Got it. But you look great. Just right for this
kind of date.”

“Thanks for
babysitting tonight.”

“I’m happy to. Between
Seth and Stella, I almost never get the chance. Mac and I are going to have a
great time, and I brought my overnight stuff with me tonight, just in case.”

Erin almost
choked at the abrupt turn of conversation, as she realized what Liz was
implying. “We’re not about to...I mean, Seth isn't...I’m not going to...”

“Well, you
never know. And you
are
wearing your best undies. Did you shave?”

Erin
had
shaved, but that was absolutely irrelevant.

“So just in
case, I brought my overnight stuff. No need to even explain. If you don’t get
home until tomorrow morning, I’ll be the soul of discretion.”

To that, Erin
didn’t respond.

***

Erin had requested that she and Seth
go somewhere quiet and out of the way for dinner, so he took her to the
exclusive dining room at an expensive, historic inn just outside of the city.
They had plenty of privacy, and the service and food were excellent.

Seth had chosen
well.

Instead of the
reserved, considerate man he usually was around Mackenzie, Seth had turned on
his charming, cosmopolitan self. He offered Erin the best of everything all
evening—and that included himself as a suave and charismatic date. They drank
expensive wine, ate delectable food, dined amid lovely antiques and artwork.

And Erin had a
really good time.

Seth looked
incredibly attractive in all black, and there was nothing cool or distant about
him as they chatted and laughed through the evening. He wasn’t openly
flirtatious and didn’t act in any way that was blatantly romantic.

But, by the
time dinner was over, Erin felt like her head was spinning just the same.

It had been so
long since she’d been out like this. So long since she’d been on any date other
than the failed double date with Liz. And—even though her relationship with Seth
was somewhat precarious—it felt really good to once more act like an
attractive, single woman, who did things like go out on Saturday nights.

Erin thought
about Mackenzie on and off during the evening, but it never distracted her from
having a good time.

She did,
however, feel the need to call Liz to check in when she and Seth finally got up
after dinner. They wandered into the lobby of the inn, where Seth saw someone
he knew. So Erin murmured that she’d quickly call Liz, while he went to speak
to his acquaintance.

The dining room
had been a little stuffy, and the lobby was even more so, so Erin made her way
through the French doors off the lobby and out onto an empty balcony. The
balcony was large and high off the ground. It boasted an ornate railing, and
huge potted plants—so tall they towered over Erin’s head—were grouped in the
corners of the balcony near the building.

It was very
late autumn, but the night was unseasonably mild, so Erin didn’t even need a
jacket. She walked over to the railing and leaned against it. Looked down into
the dark gardens and lawns surrounding the inn. Took a deep, cleansing breath.

Then she called
Liz to see how Mackenzie was.

Evidently, Mackenzie
had been an angel all night and was now sound asleep. Since Liz didn’t sound
like she was about to scream, Erin had to assume everything at home was fine.

“You’re not on
your way back yet, are you?” Liz asked. “It’s only ten o’clock.”

“I don't know.
We’re kind of in the middle of nowhere. I’m not sure what else there is to do.”

Liz made a
strangled sound that Erin chose not to interpret.

“Anyway,” Erin
continued resolutely. “I was just calling to check on things.”

“Things are
great. I’m watching a marathon of decorating shows. I now have four possible
themes to decorate my bedroom with.”

“Sounds
delightful.”

“You’re having
a good time, aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” Erin
admitted. “I’m having a really good time.”

As she
disconnected the call, she heard a warm voice from behind her. “Well, that’s
good to know.”

Erin twitched
in surprise and looked over her shoulder to see Seth approaching to stand
behind her. “You’re very sneaky. I didn’t hear you come out.”

He smiled, and
something in his expression looked almost predatory. “I prefer the word
stealthy
to
sneaky
.”

She wanted to
grin, but she found herself shivering instead—an instinctive, involuntary
reaction to his look and the seductive quality of his voice.

Something
sparked alive inside her as she felt his strong, compelling presence behind
her, as his body brushed lightly against her back.

Feeling nervous
and unsettled, Erin looked forward again, stared at the dark sky, and prayed
she wouldn’t do or say anything stupid.

“Erin,” Seth
murmured. He must have bent his neck because his voice was right at her ear.

His breath
wafted over her sensitive skin and made her shudder again, from her spine to
her toes, and also to a place between her legs that was growing hotter by the second.
She clutched the railing with both hands and refused to look back at him. “What?”

He gently
nuzzled her hair and slipped one arm around her waist. “Erin,” he breathed
again. This time she could actually feel his lips moving against her ear.

She sucked in
an urgent breath and stiffened with confusion and anxiety. It had been months
since their relationship had included this kind of physicality. She’d started
feeling secure and content with the part of Seth that was Mackenzie’s father.

She’d forced
this side of Seth to the back of her mind, and she wasn’t sure she was ready
for its sudden appearance.

“What?” she
said again, her voice even shriller than before. Her cheeks burned and her
knees shook and something almost forgotten pulsed between her legs.

“Are you
actually going to pretend you’re not feeling anything?” His hand lightly rubbed
her belly, although she wasn’t pregnant anymore.

Erin tried to
pull herself together. She was a grown woman. She knew how to handle situations
like this. “Of course I feel something. We’ve always been attracted to each
other, and you’re really turning on the charm tonight.”

“Is it
working?” He gently moved aside her hair so his lips could trace down the back
of her neck.

She was shivering
again, the tremors starting low in her spine. Her knuckles whitened as they
gripped at the railing. “A little bit. Who can resist Seth Thomas when he turns
on the sex-god act?”

He let out a
breath. She could feel it blow against her warm skin. “Can
you
?”

“Am I attracted
to you? Of course. But I don’t think we should—”

Before she
could finish, Seth turned her around so she faced him. He kept his arms draped
around her, though, so she was trapped in his embrace. “Erin,” he said, his
voice now blunt and matter-of-fact—no longer sexy or alluring. “How long are
you going to keep denying that your feelings for me are changing?”

Her mouth
dropped open. She was still physically responding to him, but now her heart also
lurched in her chest. “Seth, you have to understand. Yes, we’ve gotten closer.
Yes, we’re building up the trust between us again. But that doesn’t mean—”

“I
do
understand.”

Her face
twisted, and something heavy clenched in her gut. “I don’t know that you really
do. If it was just sex, that would be different. But it can’t just be that
anymore. I care about you a lot, Seth. And, of course, I’m attracted to you. If
we were just dating, then I’d probably think things were going well.” She put a
hand on his chest, to emphasize her urgency. “But we’re
not
just dating.
We’re...far beyond that now. And, unless things have changed, you can’t be
casual about this. You can charm the pants off me if you want, but it still
won’t make me lo—”