New Title 1 (30 page)

“
Oh my god, Slim! You're bleeding! What's going on?”

Slim didn't answer her, he only swept more dishes out of the cabinet and onto the floor. When the cabinet was completely bare, he pushed the back wall down forcefully and reached inside.

“
I was shot Noe,” he stated too calmly as he began to pull out stack after stack of money. “Your bitch ass husband shot me.”

“
Julez?” Noelle questioned in disbelief. A part of her was worried about Slim, another part was hoping that Julez had done so because he was so angry and jealous and that in some way he still loved her. “Where is he? Is he okay? ...Is he shot too?”

“
Who gives a fuck!” Slim barked, throwing the last stack of money onto the counter. “I'm shot! But for your information, no, that nigga fine.”

He grabbed a big paper bag from his cupboard and tossed the money inside.

“
Noe, pack some stuff, we gotta go.”

Noelle dropped her jaw in shock. This was all too much, too quickly. Her life had taken such a drastic turn and she wanted no more than to find out this was all one big nightmare.

“
W-what? Why? What the fuck!” She asked taken aback. “Go where?”

“
I don't fucking know where, Noe! But we gotta get the fuck outta here.”

Noelle had a sad realization and she wondered if Slim had lied to her.

“
Oh my god, did you kill him? Please Slim, don't tell me you killed him,” she cried.

Slim, becoming frustrated, grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her for dear life. His leg was in dire agony but he knew the severity of the situation.

“
Noelle! I didn't fucking kill Julez. But if we don't get the fuck outta here, that nigga is gonna kill me! He probably gonna kill both our asses.”

Noelle couldn't believe what she was hearing. She knew Julez was large and yes, it was scary and he very well may have went mad, but Slim was not one to run from anybody.

“
You're...you're running from him?” She couldn't help but ask.

Slim looked at her in disbelief mixed with anger from her insult. He took a deep breath and grabbed the back of her neck firm yet gently, bringing her face to his.

“
Noelle...mami...why didn't you tell me that nigga was a Dupree? He's a Dupree Noe, we can't go to war with that right now. Shit, I don't have the manpower. He got people everywhere! I can’t even get work from nobody beefin' wit' dis nigga! We gotta relocate. I'll come back and catch his ass slipping later. But for now, we gotta lay low.”

Slim was a street nigga, with not as much book smarts as Julez, but he had common sense. He knew the right way to play this. He knew what he'd look like doing it right now, but he knew the way to be smart, and stay alive, was to bounce. Especially while Julez was seeing red and had the upper hand on the situation.

Noelle knew what he was saying was true as well. But there was something she had to say, her own truth. Something she had realized while Slim was gone.

“
I can't.”

Slim looked her in the eyes searching for what she was trying to say. He knew she had been through a lot, he knew she was pregnant, emotional, but they didn't have time for that.

“
Mami, please. Just get some stuff. It'll be okay, I'm gonna take care of you.”

Noelle began to cry hard as she looked down, and pressed her forehead against Slim's. She really did care a lot about him, and she knew that he loved her so much. But as the tears fell from her eyes, she was almost sure that she had confused their lust for love. She was about to break yet another person's heart.

“
I...I don't ...I don't want you to take care of me Slim,” she admitted painfully. He looked into her face and his heart broke in two. He feigned as if he didn't know exactly what she was saying, but that was false.

“
I...I don't...What the fuck Noelle?” He lowered his hands to his side and took a step back from her as she continued to cry and speak.

“
I care...I care about you Slim. But...”

“
Aw man, not this shit Noe! Don't even come at me with that care about you bullshit! This is me! So you don't love me? Just like that huh? You don't love me no more, mami?” He sounded wounded, so wounded. And he looked it too. Noelle could have sworn she saw tears in his eyes and it broke her heart. But not as much as it broke her heart when Julez walked out on her.

“
I never loved you, Slim!”

She screamed it. She was so hurt, so angry, so sorry, and she didn't mean to take it out on him, but she did anyway. She needed someone to blame besides herself. “I never loved you, you were....you were a big ass mistake!”

Slim grimaced in pain and before he could find the words, he balled up his fist and punched a hole through the kitchen cabinet.

“
Bitch! I fucking gave up Jordin... I gave up everything. I fucking hit the streets, bought this fucking house! Tried to do everything to make you happy! You carrying my fucking baby! I got shot, almost got killed for you! And now, you never loved me? You a foul ass bitch Noe, I can't believe this shit!”

He was frantic, something she had never seen. Noelle felt fucked up, she knew she had told him repeatedly that she loved him, he was who she wanted, and that was what she believed at the time. But now, with Julez being gone, she was miserable.

“
I'm sorry,” she whimpered, looking down at the ground. There was a brief silence as Slim took a few deep breaths trying to calm his temper. His demeanor changed as he seemed to come to some realization. His body relaxed and his face calmed, as he came back toward her.

“
Look...ma...you're pregnant. You been through a lot of shit these past days. You got...I don't know...hormones and shit. You emotional. You...you don't know what you want. I'm here, I'm not going nowhere, Noe. Go get some things. It'll be okay...I promise.”

Noelle threw her hands in the air and shook her head, her heart still in pain but determined to get it through to him.

“
Slim...you don't get it. I do...I do know what I want!” She swallowed hard and wiped her face and then she looked him right in the eyes. “I'm sorry. But...I want my husband. I want Julez.”

Slim ran his hand over his face and after a pause, he couldn't help but let out a chuckle. It looked like the joke was on him after all. Julez's words echoed in his head.
You could never be me...

Slim nodded his head and stared off into space. He hated that nigga more than anything. He wanted to hate Noelle, but he loved her too much. So all of the hate that he should have had for her, transformed to Julez. He didn't know that he could hate him more than he had already, but now, he did.

“
Why couldn't that nigga just have died? ...I can't believe them fucking shots didn't kill his bitch ass. I hit that nigga more than once, he should be fucking
dead
.”

Noelle just stared at him for a while like she was shocked with his words. She sighed deeply before replying, her voice shaking.

“
Slim...please. Don't even...talk about that.”

Slim took a dish towel and began to wrap it around his leg, feeling a little woozy.

“
Don't talk about it, huh? Don't talk about it because you think you love that nigga now, right Noe?”

His voice was calm and so was his demeanor because he knew Noelle. He knew her better than she knew herself.

“
I do love him,” she spoke lowly, feeling ashamed. She couldn't believe he was bringing this up. Her palms began to sweat as her heart pounded.

“
No you don't, you love the life you used to live. Here, pull this towel tight,” he told her calmly as he continued. “So you love a nigga and you want him dead. That's how you living? I guess you really do love a nigga to death, huh?” He chuckled, giving a new meaning to the phrase.

Noelle shut her eyes to his cruel words as her mouth dropped open. Slim had promised her he would never bring that up again.

After the shooting went wrong and Noelle realized what a big mistake she had made by even entertaining the suggestion that Slim kill Julez, she made him swear that he would never speak another word of it. The room felt like it was spinning as he brought her back to reality.

“
Slim, how could you even...I mean, you know...you know that was a mistake. I wasn't even thinking straight when we talked about that shit!” She thought back to the conversation in the hotel room when she had asked Slim if he would do anything for her. He had said yes and had asked her the same. She was so angry with Julez at that moment, and so caught up with Slim that she allowed Slim to convince her if Julez was gone and she was the widowed, and rich wife, life for them would be sweet. Noelle didn't realize just how horrible their plans were until she almost lost Julez. She was so grateful that he had lived through that and she had felt horrible that they were responsible.

That was why she couldn't go to the hospital to see him. It was just too hard knowing that she had put him there, even down to calling Freckles and placing him at the scene just in case they investigated and needed someone with a motive. She felt dirty, it was the biggest mistake she had ever made in her life.

She began to cry hard.

“
You promised...”

“
Oh shut the fuck up, Noe!” He looked up at her after the towel was tied tight and the bleeding had ceased a little. The bullet had gone in and out and he knew where to go to get it stitched up before he hit the road.

“
Look, I did that shit for us, ma! You was down with it so don't pull that bullshit now. You said it was us, ma. You said you was over that nigga. What the fuck is going on now?”

Noelle didn't have an answer because she honestly didn't know. Maybe what she really wanted she had the whole time. He could see her confusion in her face.

“
Look, ma, forget all that shit,” he said, his voice sounding more sincere again. “I gotta get
outta
here Noe, I gotta ride... I thought you would be riding with me. I thought we had something, mami...but I guess it wasn't shit, huh...that's what you telling me?” He looked at her in her beautiful face and felt like his world was falling apart. He knew it was over, but he didn't want to let go. “Listen Noe, I really want you to come with me. If you don't love me now, if you
think
you don't love me, you will...I swear you will...”

She looked at him and battled with her emotions on what to do. He loved her, she knew he did. And she cared for him, that was true also. But she really wanted another chance with Julez, she knew that in her heart. Noelle looked at him with tears cascading down her cheeks.

“
I'm not going, Slim. I'm...I'm sorry. It's over...”

He stared at her for a moment, a long moment that seemed like an eternity. This time Noelle was certain of the tears in his eyes, she saw them for herself.

And then he leaned over and kissed her gently on her forehead, picking up his bag of money, and then he began to limp toward the front door. His heart was broken, his world was crushed, but even after everything, still, he couldn't hate her.

The Young and The Incredibly Restless