No Regrets (Bomar Boys #1) (35 page)

He expected it from Remy. Hell, he even could have accepted it from Colt. But not Jemma.

This whole week, he’d believed her when she said she was sick. Believed her when she said she had things to do that kept them apart. Like tonight with Skylar. Now that awful voice in the back of his head said she’d been trying to put space between them, to hide what she wasn’t telling him, so he wouldn’t discover the secret she was keeping.

That vile voice laughed at him for being so naïve. He’d been waiting for the other shoe to drop and now it had. Nothing was ever easy or even what it seemed. He’d been happy because he was in the dark but that was no way to live.

“Stay here.” He growled and watched Remy’s eyebrows wing up.

“What?”

“Stay here. Or don’t. I don’t give a fuck. I have to go.”

He tore the front door open and ran smack into his twin. Colt stumbled backwards but Cash only growled at the surprised look on his face. Before Colt could recover he shoved him, both hands against his chest, and watched his brother go sprawling backwards onto his ass with a shout of shock and outrage.

“What the hell, Cash?”

“Did you really think I wouldn’t find out?” He yelled, barely resisting the urge to kick his twin while he was down.

“Find out what?” Colt was up on his knees in an instant, glaring at him with a look of pain and confusion.

He’d fought plenty of people in his life. He’d used his fists more times than he could count. But he’d never taken his violence out on his twin, never, because they were always on the same side. The fact that Colt had lied to him, kept something as important as Jemma’s safety from him, hurt. It felt like betrayal, one he’d never expected.

“Really? You have that many secrets from me?” He shouted, “You have to ask which one I’ve found out?”

“I don’t know what…” Colt had come back up to his feet and his gaze widened before it came back to him, “Fuck, Remy?”

Cash could feel his older brother at his back. Remy had followed him out the door. As soon as his twin saw him, that look of confusion vanished. He put it together a lot faster than Cash had but of course Colt already knew what was going on. Cash was the only one that had been kept in the dark.

“Cash, hold on… I don’t know what he told you but…”

He narrowed his eyes, fists clenched, “But nothing. You stay the hell out of this. You’ve done enough.”

He stormed past his shock-faced twin towards Skylar’s apartment. He barely made it five feet before he felt a hand on his arm. His anger flared and he spun, grabbing the wrist connected to the hand and propelling Colt into the wall. In a matter of seconds he had him pinned, one arm against his neck, pressing his advantage.

“Goddamnit Colt! Don’t!”

“Hey, guys, let’s take a beat.” Remy tried to be a calming influence but it was far too late for that.

“Get off me!” Colt growled right back at him, struggling against the hold.

“Stay out of my way or I’ll put you down. I won’t like it but...”

A soft, feminine voice full of worry interrupted him, “Oh my God! Cash? What are you doing?”

Under any other circumstances that voice would have soothed him. It would have calmed his anger. It would have made him back away from the dangerous ledge. But not tonight.

Tonight it only made his anger pitch higher because
she
was the reason he was so angry. She’d lied to him. She’d kept him in the dark. As he turned to face her, the woman he loved, he saw the worry and concern on her face but also a flash of fear in her eyes. And this time, even that wasn’t going to stop him.

Jemma couldn’t believe her eyes. It was like looking at a stranger when that cold blue gaze met hers. There wasn’t a hint of emotion there except anger. So much anger. She’d only thought she had seen Cash at his angriest but she had been wrong she realized now. That day at the Bomar house with Decker, that afternoon in the apartment with Hoyt, he’d never looked at them the way he was looking at her right now.

When she’d left him maybe a half hour ago, maybe, he’d looked sad about letting her go but he hadn’t been upset, not really. They’d spent the evening together, engaging in a little oral worship, and like most of their nights together, it had been amazing. Her heart had been soaring and it had sucked to pry herself away from him even though she knew it was the right thing to do.

She’d been MIA with Skylar for weeks now. Ever since she’d decided to let Cash back into her life. She was living with her best friend but she’d been spending all of her time with her boyfriend. She felt a little bad about that, particularly when Skylar had asked if she’d be able to clear her schedule for some girl time tonight. She shouldn’t have had to ask, not after everything she’d done for her. So Jemma had spent some time with Cash early and then gone home to get ready for a girl’s night out.

Skylar wasn’t home from work yet but she’d text that she would be there shortly. She’d said Billie was meeting them at the bar for drinks because she needed both of her best friends to be friends again and give her some female advice. Something was going on with her boyfriend, Trey, and it wasn’t good. Jemma hadn’t been sure what that meant, couldn’t read tone of voice via text, and had been waiting for her friend to get home to fill her in on whatever was happening in her love life when she heard the raised voices outside.

Men’s voices yelling. Men she knew. Men she cared about and loved.

She’d walked outside in time to see Cash slam his brother into the brick wall and stopped short. Her mind couldn’t process what it was seeing. The twins fighting with each other wasn’t supposed to be in the realm of possibility. They fought other people. They didn’t fight with each other.

But it wasn’t just that, it was also the third figure standing just behind them.

She’d recoiled at first sight. The dark hair, tall, slim but muscular build and square jaw were too familiar not to make her stomach turn. It took an extra second for her brain to catch up to her eyes and realize it wasn’t her ex-boyfriend.

Hoyt wouldn’t be caught dead in ripped blue-jeans and the tattoo peeking from beneath his t-shirt was all wrong too. The man in front of her was too rough and too wild to truly resemble him but there were still enough similarities to make her gasp.

She’d always secretly known that Hoyt resembled the Bomar boy she loved. His features had been smoother, and darker, but the basics were all there. The dimpled chin and wide white smile, even without the smile, the scowl had been similar enough. She’d gravitated to Hoyt because he resembled the man she’d lost but he hadn’t looked as similar to Cash as he did the man standing directly behind him.

Not by a longshot.

Remington Bomar. It had to be. And along with the flash of recognition came another, horrifying realization.

He’d told Cash about the situation in Houston. He’d told him about the threats from Hoyt, about the help he’d promised to Colt. Based on the fury written all over Cash’s face, his older brother had told him everything.

Cash probably knew more about the situation than she did at that moment. Because all Colt had told her was that he had a friend in Houston that was going to get what they needed out of Hoyt. He’d slipped and mentioned their older brother was in Houston and she’d put it together that he was the friend Colt meant.

Other than that, she had no idea what he had done. She didn’t know what the plan had been. All she knew was all she needed to know. Hoyt was never going to bother her or the man she loved ever again. That had been all she needed to know, until now.

“Cash?”

“Don’t.” He spat at her and she rocked backwards from the force of that one word.

He was angry at her. Beyond angry. He knew that she knew. He knew that she knew and she’d kept it from him.

God, he looked terrifying right at that moment and some tiny little voice in the back of her head said that she needed to be careful. It was the voice of fear, the one that Hoyt had created, but she ignored it. She knew Cash better than it did, knew that no matter how angry he might be that he would never hurt her, not with his fists. She’d never been scared of him physically and she wasn’t about to start now.

“Cash, calm down, please.”

“Don’t tell me to calm down!” He roared.

“Okay, just let your brother go and we can all go inside and talk.”

He glared at her for a long moment and she found herself holding her breath. She couldn’t tell what was going on in his head and that scared her. He was standing mere feet in front of her but the look in his eyes said there were miles of distance between them. And when he didn’t budge, she worried for the first time that he might not let her cross it.

“Talk?” He snorted even as he shoved Colt hard before releasing him and stepping back to glare between them, “Now you want to talk to me?”

“Come on man, let us explain.” His twin straightened up but didn’t make any other move.

“You mean lie to me some more?”

Colt frowned, “We didn’t lie.”

“No, you just didn’t tell me what the fuck was going on.” Cash hissed, his angry gaze swinging back to her, “You kept me in the dark. You were in danger and you didn’t trust me enough to even tell me.”

“No.” She instantly took a step forward but he stepped back away from her so she stopped, “No, it wasn’t like that.”

“What the fuck was it like then, Jemma? Huh? Tell me! Tell me what went through your head when you decided to keep something like this from me. Tell me what the hell you were thinking involving my brothers. Can you tell me why everyone I care about knew you were in trouble except me?”

He was screaming at her but she heard the hurt in his voice ring loud and clear. She’d hurt him. She hadn’t meant to, but she had. She’d hurt him and he was reacting the only way he knew how, with barely leashed anger.

“Cash.” She kept her voice as calm as she could considering the situation, “Will you please come inside and talk to me? I don’t want to do this on the street.”

He looked around and his shoulders slumped slightly as some of the fight went out of him. She could only imagine what he was thinking but she winced just the same. He was being a Bomar right now. Threatening violence, yelling and fighting in pubic, he was putting on a show for all of their neighbors and he had to hate that the only way to stop it was to agree to what she asked. Because it was clear when he looked at her again that he didn’t want to agree, didn’t want to follow her anywhere, but that he would.

“Fine.”

She gave a short nod, “Thank you.”

“But not them.” He paused, looked back at his brothers and shook his head.

Colt’s jaw dropped open, “Cash, come on, let me explain.”

“No.”

“Cash!”

“Stay away from me right now or so help me God, I will put my fist through your face.”

Colt shot her a pleading look when Cash delivered that threat and she wanted to do something to help him. She wanted to leap to his defense but she couldn’t. Something told her that would only make the situation worse for both of them. Cash clearly knew enough to know that the two of them had gone to Remy for help behind his back. They’d teamed up, not against him, but around him, and helping Colt at this exact moment would only incite more anger.

She gave a short shake of her head, “Colt, go home.”

“Damn it Jem, no.” He scowled instantly.

“Fine, stay out here. I don’t care. But you’re not invited inside.” She shot another look at the dark headed brother, “You either.”

“Yeah, nice to meet you too sweetheart.” Remy smirked.

Cash growled at his brother, “Don’t call her that. Don’t call her anything. Don’t even talk to her.”

Remy narrowed his eyes at the clear threat in that order and that insidious dose of fear slithered through her veins again. She didn’t know much about Cash’s older brother but what she did know was enough to make her wary. He was a Bomar which meant he’d been born with a temper and a violent streak but on top of that he’d joined the Army which meant he’d had those instincts honed into something lethal and deadly. She had no idea if he would use those skills against his brother in a fight or not and she didn’t want to find out tonight.

“Okay, Cash. Let’s go inside.”

He didn’t look at her as he turned and stomped into Skylar’s apartment. She exchanged a worried glance with Colt. He crossed his arms over his chest and she knew he wasn’t going anywhere. He would stand right there outside the apartment until she finished talking to Cash, waiting his turn.

She stepped softly into the apartment and shut the door behind her. Cash stood in the middle of the room, his back still to her and she could read the tension rolling off of him. She was silent for a long moment, waiting for him to turn around, waiting for him to say something, and when he did neither, she swallowed down her doubts and forced herself to speak first.

“I’m sorry.”

He whirled to face her, eyes blazing, “You’re sorry? That’s what you have to say for yourself? You’re sorry?”

“Yes, because I am sorry.”

“What are you even sorry for, Jemma? Do you know?” His eyes narrowed, “Or are you trying to figure out how much Remy told me, how much I know?”

She tilted her chin up and pushed out a breath, “I’m sorry I hurt you.”

“You’re sorry you hurt me?”

“Yes. Cash, I’m sorry that you had to find out that way and I understand how…”

He cut her off with another growl, “Goddamnit Jemma! You’re not sorry I found out that way! You’re sorry I found out
at all
! You kept it from me on purpose and you never intended to tell me!”

“That’s not true.”

Even as she said the words, she could taste the lie. She hadn’t planned to tell him. Ever. That was the point of it all. She’d intended to keep it from him forever. She’d told herself that Colt and in turn even Remy would do what needed to be done, but that they would keep their actions to themselves. She’d told herself that Cash would never find out because she’d known if he did, that this was how he would react.

He was mad and she knew he had every right to be.

Everything he’d said so far had been true. She’d kept him in the dark. She’d purposefully lied to him. She’d included his brothers in something that very well could have gotten them in trouble or hurt. She’d put the people he cared about in danger and she’d done all of it with every intention of excluding him.

What was it they said about good intentions? The road to hell was paved in them. Well, she was walking her path now and it was littered with her good intentions because it hadn’t done her any good. Not telling Cash about Hoyt’s threats had only earned her the anger she’d known was inevitable being directed at her.

“Bullshit.” He spat back at her and she winced because she knew she deserved that too.

“Cash, please, I…”

“Walk me through it.”

She hesitated, “What?”

“Walk me through it, tell me what happened, tell me the moment you decided that lying to me was a better option than asking me for help. I want to know when it was that you decided to drag my brothers into this mess and not tell me that you were putting all three of you in danger.”

“It wasn’t like that.”

He only bellowed, “Tell me Jemma!”

Instinctively, she took a step back, running into the door. She wasn’t scared of Cash, that’s what her brain told her, but her body still reacted with fear. Her heart was racing and the instinct to run made her feel twitchy. No, she wasn’t scared of Cash but she wasn’t looking at the Cash she knew and loved right now. He was in there somewhere though, and so, instead of turning and fleeing or even fighting him, she gave him what he wanted in the hopes that she could reach him.

“Monday.” She started slowly, watched surprise flicker in his gaze and realized he hadn’t thought she would admit it, “Hoyt sent me the threats on Monday morning. He had evidence. Images of you and Colt leaving the apartment covered in blood. Pictures of his bruises. He could have put you both away and I couldn’t let that happen.”

He met her gaze but he didn’t soften, didn’t even blink, as if he were waiting for her to continue. Bile rose in her throat and if she’d been wavering on whether or not she was going to hate Remington Bomar after all of this was over, she was decided in that moment. He really had told Cash everything.

“There were also pictures, video, of me… in… a um… compromising position. He’d hurt me in the pictures, demeaned me, but they made me look… they were bad.” She felt sick to her stomach and from the way Cash’s cheeks went livid she knew he was imagining the worst, “He threatened to post them online.”

“That sick son of a bitch.” Cash growled, his fists clenching as he turned away from her, breathing heavily, “I’m going to kill him.”