Nothing to Lose (25 page)

Tara grabbed her purse out of the chair next to her and hopped up from the table. As Porter turned to leave, Billie called out to him.

“I'm just here to pick up my daughter,” he said, turning back to her. “I don't have to talk to you.”

“Yes, you do,” she said, looking up at him. “You still have Tara believing it's her fault you sent her away.”

“No,” Porter argued. “I made it very clear to her that it was yours.”

“This is all your fault, Porter, and you know it. You wanted to be with me again after dropping your mistress. I wouldn't agree and you retaliated by sending Tara away. It was all you had left to hurt me.”

“I don't want my daughter around someone who wants to get her on the Pill so she can sleep around. As a father, I have that right.”

“But you're confusing her,” Billie urged. “You're making her feel punished, and it has to stop. It's doing damage that could be irreversible, even if you do come to your senses down the line.”

“Look,” Porter said, “you got to see her, Billie. Twice. That's enough. Otherwise, you need to stay out of it.”

Billie shook her head. “That's not enough.”

“She's leaving in two days,” Porter said. “I think I'm entitled to spend some actual time with her.”

“Two meals is not enough for me,” Billie insisted. “She needs to stay longer.”

“She's leaving Tuesday,” he said.

“She's on summer break,” Billie countered. “It's not hard for you to manage. I want more time with her. I need more time with her.”

Porter looked amazed at what he was hearing. “I knew you'd go back on your promise, you bitch.”

“That was before,” Billie said. “Someone has got to be here for her and let her know there was nothing wrong with her asking about birth control. She's confused about why you won't let her talk to me, and she's—”

“I don't care,” Porter said. “Billie, we had a deal.”

“We have a new one,” she insisted. “At least a month. Make it happen, Porter.”

“No,” Porter said, standing his ground. “She's my daughter. She's the one thing in my life—”

“I'm the one thing in your life,” Billie said as she hopped up from the chair to face him. She was still looking up at him, but she was feeling just as tall. “You need to think of it that way. I can ruin you, Porter. I can make it so that the closest you get to practicing law is critiquing it on television.”

“Billie, please—”

“Don't say ‘please' to me,” she demanded. “Just
please me,
Porter. You do what I want or I'll destroy you. Or I'll make you wish you never met me.”

“I already do,” he said.

“What is going on?”

Neither Billie nor Porter had realized that Tara had returned from the bathroom. From the look on her face, she'd witnessed more of this scene than either of them wanted.

“Let's go!” Porter ordered.

Tara wasn't listening. With frustration, anger, and fear all mixed together on her face, she stormed straight to Billie.

“Why are you doing this?” she asked.

“What do you mean?” Billie asked, feeling awful that Tara saw that.

“Why are you saying those awful thing to my dad?” she asked. “Why would you threaten to ruin his life? Why are you telling him . . . Wait, you're the reason he's so unhappy. You're doing something to him.”

“Sweetheart, you don't understand.” Billie reached out to calm her.

Tara smacked Billie's hand away and Billie gasped.

“What is it?” Tara asked, looking from one to the other. “Is it about me? I know you're talking about me! What did I do to cause all of this?”

“Tara,” Billie pleaded. “I've told you—”

“It's not you, baby girl,” Porter said.

“Then why are you both doing this?” she asked, tears beginning to come down her cheeks. “Everything was getting better, and then I make one mistake and everything falls apart. Now this? Now you're calling her a bitch and she's threatening to ruin you! This is crazy!”

“You happy?” Porter asked Billie. His face was racked with hatred for her.

“Don't you dare!” Billie spat at him. “This is all your fault.”

“Not this time,” he said. “You're the one with the threats and—”

“Stop it!” Tara screamed so loud that everyone in the place stopped what they were doing and looked at them. At least everyone who hadn't
already
been looking at them turned around now.

“You're awful!” she yelled. “You're both just awful!”

“Tara!” Billie called after Tara as the teen turned and ran out of the restaurant.

She started to go after her, but Porter grabbed her by the arm and pulled her back.

“Get your hands off me!” she yelled.

“No!” He was fuming. “You stay away from her. Go ahead, Billie. Ruin my career if you want, but I'm not letting you hurt my daughter anymore!”

He let her arm go and rushed out of the restaurant after Tara.

Billie didn't know what to do. She felt panic swelling in her throat, and she couldn't get out of her mind the look on Tara's face. This was the worst possible outcome. Billie wanted to blame Porter, but she knew she couldn't. She was just as much— if not more—to blame this time around. She'd gone too far. All she wanted was to see her daughter, but she couldn't stop.

Just like Michael had said she wouldn't be able to do.

She felt an aching of regret throughout her entire body. Her first thought was to call Michael. She needed to talk to him. But when she dialed his number, she got the same thing she'd been getting all week, his voice mail. He wasn't talking to her.

She felt like crying now, thinking of the mess she'd made of her life. It was supposed to get better. It was looking up. The new job and the new, guilt-free boyfriend were what she'd been wanting. But she let a desire to get revenge on Porter ruin everything.

Michael was so right. Billie thought that God must have sent him to her at this point in her life to steer her in the right direction, but she ignored it. Now the man she was falling in love with wanted nothing to do with her, and she was ruining the life of the child she loved more than anything.

“Y
ou shouldn't have done that,” Billie admonished as she stood over her kitchen counter, eating a frozen dinner.

“Did you hear anything I just said?” Sherise asked.

Standing in her dining room, with her baby cradled in her arm, Sherise had just told both Billie and Erica about what she'd found out from her PI.

“Yes, I heard,” Billie responded. “And you shouldn't have done it.”

“She really did yield some great information,” Erica added, speaking loudly into the phone, which lay on her chest, as she sat back on her living-room sofa and ate ice cream out of the carton.

“Better than great,” Sherise said. “This woman is a serious fraud! When I find out who she is, I'm going to shove it down her throat and choke her with it.”

“That was pretty violent imagery,” Billie said.

“She makes me feel violent,” Sherise said. “She's threatening my family. She's threatening everything.”

“Don't get into a confrontation with her,” Erica warned. “Even though you could probably take her, you have a baby.”

“Trust me,” Sherise said. “I would never put this baby in danger, no matter how much I'd love to slap her across that little lying face of hers. I'm speaking all metaphorically.”

“Just let the private investigator do all the work from now on,” Billie advised. “Legally, you're really crossing a line.”

“Worth it,” Sherise said. “Besides, no one can say I wasn't really trying out that club.
D.C.
is a small city. People in legal disputes come across each other all the time.”

“Sherise, you're not taking me seriously!” Billie yelled.

There was an awkward silence for the moment it took Billie to realize that she'd yelled at her friend.

“Sorry,” she said. “I'm just upset.”

“Michael still isn't calling you back?” Erica asked.

“No.” Billie put down her fork, never having had an appetite, anyway. “And Tara is gone. She's back in Detroit, where I can't reach her, and she hates me.”

“She doesn't hate you,” Sherise said. “From what happened, Porter came off looking as bad as you.”

“I think she expected better from me,” Billie said.

“That's not fair,” Erica added.

“It's how it is,” Billie answered back. “Porter is her dad. He's her parent. She has to forgive him. She needs his love and approval.”

“She feels the same about you,” Erica assured her. “She'll calm down. She's an emotional teenager. Everything that happens is the end of the world.”

“But I won't be there when she calms down,” Billie said. “Porter will, and he'll poison her against me.”

“Forget Porter for now,” Sherise said. “You need to figure out how to get Michael to respond to you. Go to his home.”

“I can't do that,” Billie said. “Can I?”

“That's a little desperate,” Erica said. “They've only dated for about a month, right?”

Sherise sighed. “Frightened little girls never get what they want. You two are ridiculous. Fine, if you're too scared to go right to him, then you've got to run into him by accident, but on purpose.”

“I tried that,” Billie said. “I went to the CEO's office and basically bribed his admin to find out when Michael was going to be at the office again for any meetings. He rescheduled all his meetings to be at his office, not at the company.”

“Wow,” Erica said. “He's really avoiding you.”

“Thanks,” Billie said. “That makes me feel a lot better.”

“So find out where he goes socially,” Sherise offered. “Find out where he shops. Didn't you ever talk about the things he likes to do? Track him down there.”

“What do I say?” Billie asked.

“Do you really want him?” Erica asked.

“Of course I do,” she said. “Why do you think I'm going through this?”

“I mean, do you really, really want him?” Erica asked again. “Or do you just want him to get with the program?”

Billie knew what Erica meant. She'd placed too much blame on Michael for his inability to understand the dynamic between her and Porter. She'd wanted him to get behind her and support this ridiculous vendetta she had.

“I really want him,” Billie said. “No more games. I get it now. I felt something really special with him. I was falling in love, and I know he was too. I want him more than I want anything else, including hurting Porter.”

“Then you'll know what to say,” Erica said, “as soon as you see him.”

“This isn't a romance novel,” Sherise observed. “You better prepare your shit, girl.”

Billie found a way to laugh at Sherise being Sherise, making her feel a little better.

“I'll make it happen,” she said, only hopeful she could.

“This will be great,” Sherise said. “I'll deal with that bitch, Elena, and Justin and I will be back on track. You'll get back with Michael. And we can all focus on getting Erica laid.”

“Leave me out of this,” Erica said.

“What about Alex?” Billie asked. “You still mad at him for giving Terrell that money?”

“That was a good thing,” Sherise said. “Don't hold it against him.”

“You don't understand,” Erica said.

“We know you like him,” Sherise said, “so stop trying to front. Why aren't you moving faster with him?”

“I didn't tell you?” Erica asked, even though she knew she hadn't. She would have to get around to it at some point. “We kissed.”

After hearing the gasps, Erica went on to tell the story of Alex's visit the other day, ending with her making him leave and agreeing to let go of the issue of him helping Jonah bribe Terrell.

“What was wrong?” Billie asked. “Was he a bad kisser?”

“No,” Erica said. “The kiss itself was good, but—”

“But what?” Sherise asked.

“I don't think . . .” Erica sighed. “I don't know. I think I just let Jonah get into my head, and he's against Alex and me—”

“Who gives a shit what Jonah wants?” Sherise asked.

“Obviously, she does,” Billie answered. “I think there's more to it, Erica. Are you not telling us, or do you just not know yourself?”

“I think its Jonah.” Erica sat up on the sofa. “Between him, Terrell, and that damn Juliet accusing my mother of—”

“Let's not go there again,” Sherise interjected.

“I can't get it out of my mind,” Erica admitted.

“Then confront him about it,” Billie said. “If this is blocking you, you need to deal with it. So you can move on with Alex.”

“How would those two be related?” Sherise asked.

“I don't know that they are,” Erica said. “I mean, I think this whole thing with Alex is completely different.”

“Since we're all being so confrontational of late, literally and metaphorically,” Billie said, “I say, you go face Alex and tell him how you feel.”

“What if I don't know how I feel?” Erica asked. “What kind of lame shit is that?”

“That's exactly what he's going to say,” Sherise said.

“Maybe he's experiencing the same thing,” Billie said. “Maybe getting it out on the table will help you both figure it out.”

“Is it even that serious?” Sherise asked. “He's just a boy. It's just a kiss. One kiss, right?”

“Yeah,” Erica said, “but I have a feeling he wants another one.”

“Do you?” Billie asked.

That was a question Erica couldn't answer. Why couldn't she? She wasn't sure, but something was blocking her. She felt like her subconscious knew what it was, but her conscious self couldn't grasp it.

Alex didn't deserve this. He was a good guy, who had done something he wasn't comfortable with for—what he thought—was her sake. He deserved her honesty.

 

Sitting on her bed, early on Friday morning, Sherise could barely contain herself. She was talking on the phone with Beth and had gotten a massive amount of information. Some of it made no sense, but she'd figure it out soon enough. What she could figure out was a gold mine, and she'd done it again.

“Is there anything else?” Sherise hopped up from her bed and walked over to her dresser.

“Isn't that enough?” Beth asked.

“You have no idea,” Sherise said, almost sounding giddy. “Put this all in a report and send it to me. I want all the originals you have. I want pictures, everything.”

“What about Dennis?”

“Dennis is unimportant at this point,” Sherise said as she reached for the red panties-and-bra set. She was feeling red today and only hoped she could still fit into them. “We have everything we need to get rid of Elena Brown.”

“I'll get that to you as soon as possible.”

“Who are you talking to?”

Sherise swung around from the dresser to see Justin standing in the doorway to the bedroom. Why was he still here?

“I . . . I thought you left,” was all she could muster to say.

“Who are you talking to?” he repeated, entering the room. There was a suspicious look on his face. “I heard you say ‘Dennis and Elena.' What was that... ‘Brown'?”

“I have to go,” she said quickly into the phone before tossing it on the bed. “You were spying on me?”

“I forgot my tablet,” he said, pointing to the device, which was sitting on the settee at the end of their bed. “Stop deflecting.”

“I'm not deflecting,” she said. “I was just surprised.”

“Jacob warned us, Sherise!”

“I told you I was going to hire a private investigator,” she said.

“And I told you not to,” he answered back. “Jacob told you not to. His firm is doing this on their own.”

“They suck at it.” Sherise walked over to the settee and grabbed the tablet. Walking over to Justin, she handed it to him. “Here.”

“Actually,” Justin said, “Jacob just called to tell me that he's given the firm enough of a headache for them to want me back.”

“Good,” Sherise said. “It was unjustified. They overreacted because of problems they've had in the past.”

She reached out to hug him, but he backed away.

“What were you talking about, Sherise?” he asked, sounding more forceful this time. “And don't lie to me. I don't want any of your sneaky shit.”

“Okun Industries,” she said. “That was the account Dennis had that you took over because he had to go to rehab, right?”

He nodded. “What does that have to do with this?”

“It's a toolmaking factory in Denton, Texas.”

“So we're doing trivia?” he asked, annoyed. “You're pissing me off, Sherise.”

“Baby,” she pleaded. “If you give me one day, I promise you, I will—”

“No!” He halted her. “No secrets. Tell me what's going on.”

Sherise knew he was right. She would always have her games, but she couldn't play any with him. He was her husband and the father of her children. There would be no more secrets. Well, no more from this day.

“We need to get Elena alone,” she said.

“To do what?” he asked skeptically. “We can't harass her, Sherise.”

“No, we need to get her somewhere neutral so we can meet her face-to-face.”

“No.” Justin was backing out of the room. “That's not going to happen. Not with me or with you. Get it out of your mind, now!”

“You said you trusted me!” she called after him. “Do you?”

He stopped, looking at her for a second before shaking his head. “What the fuck are you up to, Sherise?”

“Do you?” she asked again.

He looked her deep in the eyes, searching for something that Sherise hoped she could help him find. She didn't blink, letting him take his time. He had to agree to this if it was going to work.

“What do you need me to do?” he asked, sighing, sounding as if he was resigned to his fate with this woman.

She rushed up to him and wrapped her arms around him. She kissed him hard on the lips and both cheeks. She leaned away, holding his face in her hands.

“Together, we're about to end this, baby,” she said gleefully. “In a big, big way.”

 

When Erica entered Jonah's office at the Pentagon, there were several people already there. A meeting had just completed and she was shuffled in before the rest of the team left. She recognized some of the people as having been part of his staff when she worked for Jonah. Seemed like ages, but really it wasn't that long ago.

Erica wasn't in the mood to be polite, so she sat down in the chair on the opposite side of the desk and just waited, not bothering to speak to anyone.

She had a lot on her mind. She'd been to work today, but she felt awkward around Alex after they had kissed. She said hello to him in passing, but she did her best to avoid him. It was childish, she knew, but she wasn't yet sure what to make of that kiss and what to do about it. Besides, she was distracted from thoughts of it because of her issues with Jonah—issues that were too many to count. But for now, Erica would concentrate on his injection of Alex into their conflict with Terrell, and his bitch of a wife accusing her mother of being a home wrecker.

Within a few minutes, everyone had left. Jonah stepped out to say a few words to his assistant; then he reentered the room, closing the door behind him.

“I know what this is about,” he said, before even sitting down at his desk. “I know you're upset about me sending Alex to pay Terrell. Alex told me. Honestly, Erica, I could try and appease you, but the truth is—”