Paradisal Tragedy (2 page)

“Listen little girl, I’m not going to apologize. You should have been paying attention. Who brings an iPod into a restaurant anyways?”

“Obviously nobody.”

“You shouldn’t bring technology into places like this. You never know what might happen. You must be new around here, I’ve never seen you.” He was starting to sound curious, like he cared about who she was.

“It’s none of your business. It doesn’t matter who I am, just get out of my way, I need to go,” Annabella responded. She already hated him. He was cocky, rude and didn’t even care about the fact that he’d been the one who’d knocked her over, ruining one of the only things she had left in the process.

“Well okay then.”

“I have to leave now,” Annabella said, moving around the beautiful stranger. She left, flinging the door wide open. Running to her car, she sat there and cried for what seemed like hours. Her life would never get easier, would it? Everything bad always happened to her; she hadn’t had good luck in months. She was a broken mess and she had no one that was there for her. All she needed was someone to wrap her in their arms and tell her that everything would be okay, but it wouldn’t happen.

Three

Sitting in her room, Annabella sat in front of her desk with her journal open and a pen in hand, letting the poetry flow out of her. After all she’d been dealing with lately, she found herself needing an outlet, and poetry let her vent in a way she couldn’t with anything else. Thinking back to earlier that night, at the restaurant, she let her emotions get the best of her. She couldn’t understand how she was at fault for that guy running her over, destroying her iPod in the process.

Who the hell did he think he was? He was just like every guy in this God forsaken world.

She remembered back to the time when she believed in the goodness of people, but that valuable trait was stolen from her, and as hard as she might try, Annabella couldn’t forget and move on, though God knows she’d tried.

Every single day she woke up to live she wasn’t even really living. She was breathing, but she wasn’t
living
. Her life had been taken from her, and she didn’t know how in the world to get it back.

The emptiness of the house made the memories come back in flashes. The way he looked at her, the way he had spoken to her. It always came back when she was all alone. Her past haunted her with each and every waking day, and she couldn’t stop it. For now, she’d keep on barely living.

“Bella?” she heard a soft knock on her door, then her door opening, revealing her mother, Jennifer. She was wore black strapless dress with sparkles that went throughout it. Her hair was a chocolate color and had been thrown into an exquisite bun.

Relief flew through her as she realized her parents came home early. It wasn’t a secret that she was distant from them, but she would admit that she felt much safer having them around than she did when they were gone.

“I thought you and Daddy weren’t going to be home until later tonight.” Annabella recalled them telling her they’d be at their fundraiser until around midnight, as they always were with those events.

“That was the original plan, but Dad started feeling ill after dinner, so here we are,” Jennifer explained, sitting next to Annabella on her bed. She stared at her daughter with fearful eyes, knowing that she was no longer herself and wanting nothing more than to hold her the way she used to. She knew deep down that something was going on, and it was something big, but knowing what it was like to be a teenager her age, she wouldn’t let herself push her daughter the way her parents had done to her. “Do you need anything?”

“I’m fine,” Annabella lied. She was getting quite good at it too, if she had to say. She wasn’t fine at all, she was slowly breaking apart, and there wasn’t anything anyone could do to stop that realization.

“What do you say to a Vampire Diaries or True Blood marathon?” Jennifer offered her daughter in hopes that she’d say yes, especially considering how they’d rarely spent any time together whatsoever since they’d moved. Jennifer hated how much she rarely seen Annabella lately, she was her entire world and there was nothing she wanted more than to spend as much time as she possibly could with her.

“No thanks, I’m really tired. In fact, I was heading to bed before.” Annabella yawned. She was tired. Hell, she was more than tired, she was exhausted, but she knew like every other night she wouldn’t sleep; the nightmares would haunt her, they always did. Nighttime was the worst for her. She just tried to bury it further and further in her soul. It was a secret that was ripping her apart inside.

“Okay, sweetheart. Are you okay? I mean here in Chandler. Did Dad and I ruin your life by moving you here? We are just so worried about you. We knew you were upset when we first revealed that we were moving here, but we thought you’d made peace with it. I mean, even before we left Tampa, you wouldn’t come out of your room, you cried all the time and you never wanted to see your friends. Baby, we’re lost here. We don’t know how to help you if you don’t open up to us, we really only want you to be happy, that’s all.”

“Mom, I’m fine. Nothing is wrong. I know I’ve changed, but I’m fine. I promise.” Annabella lied. She had no words to say, she couldn’t tell her the truth, it was for her own good, it was for everyone’s own good that she kept her secret buried inside.

“You’d tell me if something was bothering you, right?”  Jennifer asked with caution. The girl she was staring at in front of her, it wasn’t the girl she knew her daughter to be. She couldn’t pin point exactly what was wrong here, but she wanted nothing more than to take her in her arms and beg her to let her in, but in reality she knew when the time was right, Annabella would come to her. Or so she hoped.

Annabella sat in silence for a long moment as she thought of the answer to her mother’s question. Would she tell her if something was wrong? If she was being completely honest, under any other circumstance she’d tell her mother what was bothering her, but she couldn’t tell her mother what happened to her. It wasn’t fair to her; her mother always chose to see in the good in the world. She wasn’t going to take that away from her mother, she wouldn’t be the person to take away her happiness, and Annabella knew that.

“Mom, of course I’d tell you, but there’s really nothing to tell,” Annabella assured her, wanting to stop talking about this. 

“Baby, I’m sorry to keep pressuring you, it isn’t what I want. It’s just, you’re my entire life. I’ve loved you from the moment that I found out I was pregnant with you and I’ve never stopped and you didn’t just change a little bit, you went from being the beautiful, careless little girl I’ve always known, and now you’re the lost girl who wears all these baggy clothes, you spend most nights in your room. I just want to know that you’re okay.”

“I’m fine mom, I promise. I’m really tired. Can I please just go to bed?” Annabella’s stood in front of her mother as her arms crossed over her stomach.

“Of course.” She said sadly and left the room.

Annabella felt the stillness after her mother left. She knew that she was worried, and for that she was sorry. She hated lying to her parents. But, technically, she wasn’t lying to them; she just wasn’t being completely honest. She was becoming a complete zombie.

She missed her old life; the way things had been before it was taken from her. Her mother always told her, “Never live with regrets. Be thankful for everything that happens to you because in the end it’s all a part of who you are.”

Annabella used to believe in that saying. She used to embrace it up until the night
he
stole her life.

                             ***

“Everyone calls you Bella; I think I’ll call you Anna. My Anna banana.” He says as he touches my face. My heart begins to race. What is he doing?

“You’re so beautiful. Your hair is so silky and long. I just want to run my fingers through your hair.” He says as he puts his left hand to my hair.

“You shouldn’t be in here. I need to finish putting my things away.” I tell him, but before I can get away, he slams me into the gym locker and covers my mouth.

“Shhhhh. It’ll be over soon.”

***

Gasping awake, Annabella was drenched in her own sweat. Her nightmares were common – she’d been having them since the night it happened – but lately they seemed to occur more often than not. The twisted memories came flooding back and she found herself sobbing violently.

Gripping her pillow, she held on for dear life and pretended it was her mother. For one moment, she pretended it was killing her. She pretended that it wasn’t a secret and she’d let her mother inside, revealing her torment.

She just wanted her mother to hold her and tell her that everything was going to be okay. She wanted her to say that no one would ever hurt her again. The pain was terrible as she got out of bed and looked out her window.

It was daylight, and she was beyond thankful that the night was gone.

After showering and dressing, she decided to go for a walk, and found herself crying in the park at a picnic table. She hated who she was becoming. She hated the person
he
was turning her into. She hated dresses, skirts and anything else girly. She hated everything about herself. It didn’t matter how many years would go by, she’d never be able to forget that horrible day in the locker room. She’d never be able to forget the filth she felt even months after.

“Are you alright?” a familiar, deep voice asked.

Looking up, Annabella quickly wiped her tears, noticing the guy who’d been so vicious cold after spilling his food on her stood by a tree.

“I’m fine,” she said, moving from the table so she wasn’t facing him. She wiped her eyes where she hoped he couldn’t see.

“Hey, you don’t look like you’re fine,” he observed, walking to so he was sitting across from her on the picnic table. His eyes bored into her with a sympathetic look. There wasn’t anything he hated more than seeing a girl cry.

“Here, use these.” He thrust a small packet of tissues under her nose, and without fighting him on it she took them and wiped her eyes.

“Do you always carry tissues in your pocket so you can come rescue some damsel in distress?”

“I might.” He smirked, giving her a wink. “Listen, I really want to apologize, for yesterday. I acted like a total dick for something that was my fault. It’s not me, I’m actually a pretty decent guy.” He apologized, sounding sincere enough. He just wanted to make things right; he was sure this girl hadn’t deserved to be treated the way he’d treated her the night before.

“It’s okay,” Annabella assured him, saying anything in order to get away from him. She was a mental mess right now, and she honestly didn’t want anyone seeing her in this state, even if it was just a stranger.

“Here,” he said, handing her a pink iPod, exactly like the one he’d ruined. Annabella’s eyes began to widen at the sight. He’d bought her a new iPod. This little meeting couldn’t have been a coincidence. Had he followed her? She began to feel uneasy and sat on the bench.

“Why would you buy that for me?” Annabella whispered.

“I ruined your iPod and then acted like a complete jerk about it. And I’m sorry for the way I treated you. I had a bad day, and maybe I just took that out on you.” he said.

“I can’t accept that though. I mean you barely know me – I mean how did you even find me here?”

“We live in a really small town; all I had to do was ask around and I found your house. Except I saw you walking here, so I just followed you, and I know that sounds creepy, but I can promise you I’m not
that
guy. I just wanted to apologize and right my wrong from last night.”

“You
followed
me?” Annabella asked, fear bubbling inside.

“I did. It’s not what you think; I wasn’t stalking you. I just wanted to apologize and give you this.” Travis explained. “Please take it; if you don’t I will make it my personal mission to find you every single day and beg you to take it,” Travis joked, his green eyes full of amusement.

“I really can’t accept that,” Annabella repeated, despite the fact that her iPod was extremely important to her. Like poetry, music was a coping mechanism for dealing with the awful cards she’d been handed.

“Please take it.” He begged her, shifting from his seat to stand on his knees. “If you don’t, I’ll have to see you every day, and follow you like a lost puppy until you accept this gift that I graciously picked out just for you.”

Annabella couldn’t help but laugh at the irony of his statement. “Fine, I’ll take it, but I will pay you back for this. I’m only going to take it so you don’t have to end up in jail for being a stalker.”

“So can I ask you something?” Travis asked, moving from the ground. Ever since meeting her, he wanted to know her. She just seemed intriguing and different than other the other girls her age, including Marissa. Marissa was the girl that shattered Travis’s heart. Ever since dating her, he hadn’t been able to see another girl as more than a one night stand.

“What is it?” Annabella asked, wondering what in the world she was still doing there. She didn’t communicate with people; she tended to stay to herself, especially when it came to people of the opposite sex. They were animals, right?

So why couldn’t she will herself to leave the park.

“Why did you move here?” Travis asked, sitting next to her on the bench.

Annabella began to fidget with her oversized sweater. She was hurt in the most violent and horrible way.
That’s
why she moved here. How could she possibly tell that to anyone – a stranger no less?

“Personal reasons,” Annabella said softly, trying anything to get him to leave. She couldn’t handle someone being so close to her. In fact, she hated it. Putting space between them, Annabella got off of the bench and began to pace back and forth. “I’m not sure I’m comfortable sharing with a stranger.”

“I’m Travis,” he introduced himself, offering her a hand. “What’s your name?”

“Annabella.”

“See, now we don’t have to be strangers anymore, so what kind of personal reasons?” Travis asked. He was surprised how interested he was in her. She seemed different, she didn’t throw herself at him, and he liked that. There hadn’t been a girl he met who hadn’t crushed on him in such a long time. Or maybe that was just his cockiness.

“My dad got a job offer. It was better than the one he’d had in Tampa, plus my parents thought it would be better for me.” She finally stated, not entirely sure why she was revealing all of this to a stranger.

“Better for you how?” Travis asked. Annabella was almost grateful when her phone began to ring in her pocket. When she looked at the caller ID, a picture of her best friend from Tampa appeared. Aubrey.

“I’ll let you get that. Again, I’m really sorry for all the things I said, and I hope to see you around,” Travis admitted. Before he could stop himself, he was gone.

“Hello?” Annabella answered, not wanting to face anything in her past.

“It’s about time you answered. It’s been weeks since you’ve called,” Aubrey hissed at her harshly.

Annabella and Aubrey met when they were six, and they always had the exact same classes all throughout grade school. They were each other’s wing-girl in time of need. They shared everything together, until recently when Annabella began shutting everyone out, especially her best friend.

“I’m sorry Aubrey. I’ve just been busy getting settled,” Annabella lied. She couldn’t face the wrath of her best friend right now. She wanted more than anything to tell her everything, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

“It’s okay; I’ve just been so worried about you Bell. You’re my best friend one day, then the next you’re a completely different person,” Aubrey observed sadly. She missed her friend, in every sense of the word.

Aubrey had been the first person to notice her change. She stopped hanging out, she always skipped lunch, and she even stopped responding to the texts Aubrey sent her a million times a day. She called her out on it one day, telling her that she needed to get her act together before she destroyed everything good in her life, but Annabella just didn’t care.

“I know that, and I’m sorry, but I’m okay. I promise,” Annabella tried to sound happy, but the crack in her voice said otherwise. Lucky for her, Aubrey didn’t notice

“I miss you so much, so many things have happened, and you’re just not here to share them.

“I miss you too. I wish you could come visit,” Annabella said honestly. And she meant it. Maybe not anytime soon – she still wasn’t ready to face her – but she did want to see her friend. As much as she hated the thought of ever going back to her hometown, she missed her friends. She had no one in Chandler and that made everything worse. It was her own fault in a way; she was the one who chose not to go to a public school to finish up high school. She took the online route and graduated almost two months earlier than the public system did.

“Me too. Listen, I have to run, but promise me that you’ll text me later?” Aubrey demanded. Annabella could tell she was serious.

“I promise Aubrey. Tell everyone I said hi,” Annabella told her best friend. Then she switched her phone off and began the walk home.

                               ***

Sitting on couch in his garage, Travis began thinking about Annabella for what felt like the millionth time, yet he couldn’t understand why. He literally just met her. He wasn’t sure if it was the fact that she wore clothes that were five sizes too big for her, or if it was her ability to resist him. Every girl he met since he started hitting the gym at fourteen threw themselves at him, but she didn’t. She seemed to be oblivious to his looks, and that fascinated him. It drew him to her. He knew from that moment he had to know her.