Pasta Imperfect
I fell asleep the moment my head hit the pillow — awakened what seemed like hours later by a chorus of voices shouting in Italian just outside my door. I cracked an eye to squint at the ceiling, then reached over to hit the illumination bar on my travel alarm: 1:06. Okay, I knew Italians were night owls, but this was a public building, and some of us wanted sleep!
I crawled out of bed, shrugged into my Laura Ashley dress, and staggered across the room, thinking fierce thoughts. I threw open the door. “Would you people
please —”
The corridor was empty.
I looked left. I looked right. I stepped farther into the hallway and peered down the staircase. The voices I’d heard echoed up from the lobby. But they weren’t the voices of rowdy Italian night owls. They were the voices of a half dozen uniformed police gathered around a woman whose lifeless body lay at the bottom of the stairs.
My eyes froze open in horror.
And she was wearing my new stretch denim corset dress with the bra straps!
Turn the page to read critical raves for Maddy Hunter’s bestselling
Passport to Peril
mysteries…
Hilarious and delightful…. I found myself laughing out loud and wiping away tears (of joy) as I quickly flipped the pages. I can’t wait for the next trip!”
—
The Old Book Barn Gazette
“A delightful cozy that is low on gore but rich in plot and characterizations. There is plenty of slapstick humor…. The mystery is well constructed and the supporting cast yields a number of suspects….”
— The Best Reviews.com
“No sophmore jinx here…very funny and full of suspense.”
—
Romantic Times Bookclub Magazine
“WARNING: Do not munch on Triscuits or anything covered in powdered sugar while reading this book! I nearly choked from laughing so hard…. There was belly laughter, or at least a chuckle, on each page. This is the most fun I’ve had in a while.”
—
The Mystery Company Newsletter
“I found myself laughing out loud…. The word ‘hoot’ comes to mind.”
—
Deadly Pleasures
“Light and witty…. While we’re all waiting for the next Janet Evanovich, this one will do perfectly.”
— Sleuth of Baker Street (Ontario, Canada)
“A debut with more than a few chuckles….
Alpine for You
is one to cheer the gloomy winter days.”
— Mystery Lovers Bookshop
“A very funny and promising start to Hunter’s
Passport to Peril
series.”
—
Romantic Times
“If you’re looking for laughter, you’ve come to the right place…sure to provide giggles and guffaws aplenty. Hunter’s confident voice and her compelling first person narration…mak[es] Emily a complete person with pluck and purpose and personality. The writing style is breezy and accomplished…. First-rate entertainment!”
Cozies, Capers & Crimes
“Move over, Evanovich, there’s a new author in town…. One of the best I have read for a long time…. Hilarious. The characters are an absolute hoot.”
—
Under the Covers
“Delightfully fresh, with a great deal of humor.”
— Creatures ’n Crooks Bookshoppe
“As funny as anything by Katy Munger, Janet Evanovich, [or] Joan Hess…. The laughs started on the first page and continued, nonstop, to the last…. This one gets five stars. It’s a winner.”
— Blackbird Mysteries
“A compelling heroine, an intriguing hero, and a great scenic tour. I’m impatiently looking forward to the next one.”
—
The Old Book Barn Gazette
Passport to Peril
mystery series
ALPINE FOR YOU
TOP O’ THE MOURNIN’
Published by Pocket Books
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
An
Original
Publication of POCKET BOOKS
 | POCKET BOOKS, a division of Simon & Schuster, Inc. 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020 |
Copyright © 2004 by Mary Mayer Holmes
All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever.
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To my buddies, Tony and Herm, who made Italy so delightful…twice!
With love~
mmh
“Everything comes to those who wait.” Careers have their ups and downs. My writing career collapsed in the early nineties. For the next decade, I struggled to put two words together in the same sentence. When I finally finished what I considered to be the defining work of my career, no one wanted to read it. But I waited, and persevered, and waited some more…and then everything changed.
My universe is peopled with friends and family who believed in me even when I found it difficult to believe in myself. If not for my connection to them, I still might be struggling to put two words together. I offer my deepest thanks to all of them, and to the following people:
To Pam Johnson, for her kindness and generosity in introducing me to her amazing agent.
To Irene Goodman, a.k.a. “the amazing agent,” for the phone call that began, “I love what you’ve written. I want to represent you.”
To Herm Kuhn, Sue Hubbard, Margaret Dohnalek, Marge and Jim Converse, Sharon Gasser, Barb Schuler, Micki Harper, Linda Kuhn, and Minda Danner, for buying my books in bulk and giving them away to their friends like pieces of penny candy.
To Margaret Kaufman, for her extra footwork and picture-taking in Florence, and to her companions, Virmati Hitchings, Lisa Wax, Tinker Zimmerman, and Merilee Obstbaum, for becoming part of the research team.
To Terri Bischoff and Linda Vetter, owners of Booked for Murder, for their enthusiasm in promoting a local mystery author.
To Johanna Farrand, for the tongue-in-cheek cover copy she so cleverly pens.
To Jeff Fitz-Maurice and Paolo Pepe, for their artistry and imagination in designing my dynamite book jackets.
And most especially, to Christina Boys, my extraordinary editor, for her unflagging encouragement, ultra-efficiency, eye for detail, uncanny ability to know what needs fixing and how to fix it, and on a more personal level, for her grace, thoughtfulness, laughter, and breathless chats. You are a special gift in my life — a gift that was well worth waiting for.
Maddy Hunter
T
here are lots of things you can’t do in Rome.
You can’t leave your belongings unattended without fear of having them ripped off. You can’t talk in the Sistine Chapel. You can’t exit the Colosseum the same way you entered. You can’t buy a ticket aboard a bus from a vending machine that’s out-of-order. And you can’t take pictures in St. Peter’s Basilica.
Don’t get me wrong. You can
try
to take pictures of the towering marble columns, the gilded arches, and the dazzling mosaics, monuments, and altars. The Vatican encourages all kinds of photography. But the thing is, everything is so big inside the basilica, you have to stand really far back to get your shot.