Perilous Pleasures (13 page)
Read Perilous Pleasures Online
Authors: Patricia Watters
Stefan looked down. "From a tiger. But it was because I made the mistake of working in a wet arena and lost my footing. I've learned my lesson and it won't happen again."
Joanna noted that he'd made the statement in that quiet, infuriatingly confident tone he used when explaining away his accidents. She pursed her lips and glared at his shoulder. "What about these?" she clipped, angry at the sight of the ugly scars in his smooth flesh.
He shrugged. "A lioness jumped me from a high pedestal. But if I had been more experienced and paying attention, I would have known she was primed for a leap. Another lesson I've learned well."
"Umm," Joanna hummed in irony. She ran her finger over a jagged scar that started at his groin and moved down his inner thigh. She had not noticed it before. "And this was another male lion vying for dominance, I suppose," she clipped, feeling a strong sense of possession for that part of him, another reminder of how vulnerable he was.
Stefan looked down at the scar and sighed. "An undisciplined, half-grown tiger cub got me with his rear claws when I was trying to medicate him. It was during the night, and I only had my drawers on. It was also the reason my wife left me."
Joanna stared at him, wide-eyed. "Your wife left you because of a cub?"
"Because the strike was too close for her comfort. She thought I was being careless by not protecting myself with padding, even while handling a cub, and she was convinced I'd eventually end up like Klaus Haufchild."
Joanna looked at him, puzzled. "I thought he lost an arm."
"He did," Stefan said, "but he almost lost a leg, and...well, let's just say, he is no longer capable of performing in the bedroom."
Joanna's eyes fixed on the two scars and their implications. All she could bring herself to say was, "I see."
Stefan laughed it off. "Another foolish mistake that won't happen again," he said, with confidence. "I've learned from my mistakes, and for tonight we will put it all behind. " He pulled her toward him and Joanna didn't resist.
Cuddled against him, she said, "Did you love your wife?"
He kissed her on the temple. "Yes."
"But, not enough to give up your cats?"
He sighed. "She wasn't willing to compromise. I suggested she stay away when I worked with the cats, but she said she couldn't
not
watch. Then, I told her I'd get rid of the troublemakers. But she wanted me to give it all up... work only with her horses."
"What's wrong with that? You'd still be working with animals," Joanna clipped.
"Horses don't offer the challenge cats do. Each cat has a distinct personality, each requires a different method of handling and training. And when fourteen lions and tigers are performing and it comes together, it's all worthwhile."
Joanna felt a gut-wrenching knot coiling in the pit of her stomach. "Fourteen?" she said in a tight voice. "You're planning on adding more?"
"Possibly."
"And when it doesn't come together. What then?"
Stefan released a long burdensome sigh. "That doesn't happen very often."
Joanna looked at him dubiously. "Then what I saw in Vicksburg was an illusion?"
Stefan's jaws tightened. "I'm not saying the cats don't fight, and occasionally attack. But in Vicksburg... well, Rafat was behind that."
"Then why don't you get rid of him?" Joanna hissed.
Stefan shrugged. "Because with patience and work he'll be a good performer. There's a majestic quality about him, exceptional facial characteristics, and he's intelligent and alert. I'll be working him on a harness tomorrow. I want you to watch."
Joanna felt as if she were teetering on the edge of an abyss. "It terrifies me to see you in that cage," she said in a hopeless voice she almost didn't recognize. "But staying away doesn't resolve anything either. I'd just be wondering if the animals were restless or irritable, or if Rafat would cause trouble."
"Then you'll come watch?"
"I don't know."
"Trust me, sweetheart. Nothing will happen."
Joanna's pulse drummed as the bitter taste of fear rose in her throat. "I wish I could truly believe nothing will happen, but I can't." She moved out of the circle of his arms and stood.
He looked at her puzzled. "Where are you going?"
"No further than the wash basin." She filled the basin, dipped a washcloth into the water and started passing it over her body.
Stefan moved to stand beside her and took the cloth from her hands. "This is my job." As he wiped off her sweat-dampened body, he said, "For now, don't try to work everything out. There's time for that." He dipped the cloth in the water, wrung it out and concentrated on the areas of their lovemaking. "Just let me love you and be a part of you."
"That's what terrifies me," Joanna said. "You are a part of me now. I feel like you're my whole life, even though our lives together have barely begun." She took the cloth from him and dipped it in the water. "I wish things were not so complicated," she said, wringing out the cloth. "I don't know why it has to be this way. Matthew's life is so simple." She guided the cloth over Stefan's chest and down his belly. "Matthew has a wife, a son, a job—" she dipped the cloth again and wrung it out "—he lives in one place. Is happy."
She paused as she concentrated on his male part, which was beginning to take form again.
"You'd better stop there," Stefan said. He took the cloth from her and pulled her up to stand in front of him. "For tonight, put your fears aside and sleep cradled in my arms." He took her hand and stepped over to the bed, then pulled her down to lay beside him.
She cuddled against him. "I'll try," she said. "I do want this night with you."
He kissed her on the forehead, and said, "I love you, sweetheart."
She started to tell him that she loved him too, but the words seemed untimely, though she knew she did love him. She knew it because she would willingly give her life for him. And their lovemaking had been wondrous, unlike anything she could possibly have imagined.
She rested her head against the hollow of his shoulder and placed her hand over his heart and stared at the changing patterns on the wall. She wanted to go on loving him throughout eternity, but tomorrow he'd be back in the cage with his cats, and as long as she stayed with him, the terrible fear would haunt her day and night, until his cats would finally get him.
She wasn't sure she could live with that fear.
CHAPTER SIX
Stefan gazed at Joanna sleeping beside him. Soft morning light touched her serene face and caressed her breasts where the bed linens fell away. He reached out and opened the latticed shutters and peered out the window. They had arrived in Baton Rouge, and a heavy, dapple-gray sky hung over the city. Shiny puddles gathered on the promenade deck and droplets of water clung to the railing and balusters.
Joanna moved restlessly, then her eyes drifted open. "What do you see?" she asked.
"A cool, rain-soaked morning." Stefan closed the shutters and stretched out beside her. He kissed her long and lingeringly and nuzzled the hollow behind her ear. A delicate fragrance suggesting fresh cut flowers tickled his nostrils. "I forgot to mention last night, but some gypsy couples elope—no bride price, no ceremony. The parents come after them, but if they have consummated their love, they are considered married."
Joanna eyed him with amusement. "Then there must be no single gypsies."
Stefan laughed. "Actually, it's a myth that gypsies are unchaste. Sexual activity outside of marriage is taboo. So you see, Mrs. Janacek, we are now married."
"Mrs. Janacek," she said dreamily. "I like the sound of that."
"So do I," he said, gathering her in his arms. "So do I."
She snuggled against him. The idea of being married to Stefan made her feel whole. Curled in his arms, she felt as if there was no one, and nothing else in the world but them. She tipped her face up and kissed him on the chin. "Married or not, you've spoiled me for any other man," she said. "I'm certain I could never feel anything close to what I felt last night when you made love to me. It was even better than in my fantasies."
Stefan's hand began meandering over her body. "What fantasies?"
"About making love to you in the dust of the arena."
Stefan raised a dubious brow. "The dust of the arena?"
"It started at the interview, you know, me at the top of the pavilion with the doves, you in the dust of the arena with the lions. But I was not with the doves. I was in the dust with you. Your... umm... well, lack of costume, except for the little vest and tight breeches, had my heart pumping, and I wondered if you were as heart-stopping below the waist as you were above."
"And what have you decided about what's below my waist?"
Her hand moved down to toy with the scar. "I think it's pretty... "
He stared at her. "You think that thing below my waist is pretty?"
She smiled. "Pretty magnificent, that is. In fact it exceeds all expectations."
Stefan chuckled. "Well, I had a fantasy that day at the interview too."
"You did?" Joanna's heart quickened. "What was it?"
"Your beautiful body unhampered by costume performing on the trapeze for me alone. And I would be primed and ready and waiting in the net below for you to fall." He grinned wickedly. "The rest is not for delicate ears."
She gave him a sultry smile. "After last night, my ears are no longer delicate."
Stefan arched a brow, brushed the hair from her ear and whispered his fantasy.
Joanna blushed, yanked the pillow from under him and pounded it across his chest. "That's obscene!"
"I know. Would you like to try it out, Mrs. Janacek?"
She gave him an evil grin. "Yes, Mr. Janacek, I most certainly would."
Stefan rolled over and draped his leg across her thighs while pinning her wrists together above her head and against the mattress. "I starts something like this?" he said, against her ear before taking the soft lobe between his lips. He kissed her deeply, his tongue both teasing and demanding. Then he sat up, reached for her foot and began massaging it gently. "I'm going to make you tingle in places you didn't know existed," he said, his palms gliding up her calf until he touched her intimately.
She moaned, filled with an urgency she recognized as being on the brink of fulfillment. Raising heavy eyelids, she found Stefan smiling contentedly, as if her body, and the enjoyment he was giving her, was his greatest pleasure. She touched his lips and said, "I wish the feeling inside me could go on forever."
Stefan kissed the tips of her fingers as they followed the contour of his lips. "If it went on forever," he said, "I'd know I was doing something wrong." He bent down and kissed her toes... her instep... her calf, moving up. She splayed her hands over the broad expanse of his back, feeling muscles rippling beneath her touch as he tasted and teased forbidden places before kissing the curve of her throat and the hollow of her neck. He stopped what he was doing and said, "Last night, I convinced you that we would pleasure each other in ways that would not create a child, then I took you anyway. So we'll stop here, and I'll go back to my stateroom before I lose control and take you again."
He started to sit up, but Joanna grabbed his arm. "No," she said. "You didn't take me last night, I gave myself to you with all my heart, and body, and soul. I don't know whether I can learn to live with what you do, but for the time we have together, I want you completely. And I want you now." This time when they made love, Joanna savored the glory of Stefan's lovemaking, but she also pleasured him in ways she hoped he would cherish. For a long time afterwards, neither spoke, each delighting in the last waning ripples. Then Stefan looked into eyes radiantly alive and glowing with love, and when Joanna smiled at him, time stood still, as if there were nothing, and no one else in the world. He brushed a damp lock from her forehead. "I'd like nothing better than to spend the day in bed making love to you," he said, trailing a finger along her cheek and down her neck, "but I have to tend to my cats."
Joanna sighed. "And I'm supposed to meet Gene and Otto at nine." She glanced at the clock and saw that it was almost eight thirty. "I don't want you to go."
"And I don't want to go." Stefan bent over and kissed her soundly, then went to the basin and filled the bowl with water. She stepped beside him and dipped the wash cloth. How suddenly their lives had come together, and how quickly their love had blossomed. The thought of being Stefan's wife and spending the rest of her life with him pleased her. And terrified her. After a short washing ritual, Stefan tugged on his drawers, and Joanna slipped into her robe and sat at her dressing table. While combing her hair, she was again tormented by macabre thoughts of Stefan in the cage with the cats. It was like an endless cogwheel of worry. But this evening she would again be secure in Stefan's arms, and his lovemaking would take away the tension of the day. At least for a little while.
Stefan walked up behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Red is the traditional color for a gypsy bride," he said. "It represents happiness and good health." Lifting the collar of her robe he studied the small yellow roses embroidered in the delicate lace, and added, "But yellow is the color of suffering." He looked at her in the mirror. "And I see it in the worry in your eyes and in the tension on your beautiful face."
Joanna's eyes met the reflection of his gaze in the mirror. She looked steadily at him. How easily he could read her, even though she'd tried to hide her anxiety. Was there something inherent in gypsies that allowed them to probe people's thoughts? She chewed on her lip, and replied, "I didn't think it showed."
He squeezed her shoulder. "Enough about that. I have something I want to give you later, something to hang here—" his finger touched her chest "—close to your heart."
Joanna stood and turned to face him. "What is it?"
"A stone given to me by a
romni
bari
—an old woman with psychic powers. She said if I gave it to my true love, she'd be protected from danger as long as it hung close to her heart."