Pick-me-up (24 page)

“Look, what do you want me to do?”
 Tim’s words weren’t laced with the earlier irritation, but
were flat.  Katelyn heard him let out a deep breath.
 “Travis is waiting.  I gotta go.”

Katelyn tried to get her voice together so he
wouldn’t hear her crying.  Before she could say anything, the
line went dead.

She heard a pan clatter to the floor in the
dining room followed by Kayla’s tired cry.  Her dad began
yelling at Kayla to shut up.  Katelyn jumped from her bed and
ran out of her room.  By the time she reached the dining room,
Kayla was screaming and crawling under the table.  

“You come out of there right now.  You
won’t make a mess in my house and get away with it.  Get out
here.  Get out here.”  Her dad had lowered himself to the
floor and was reaching after her.  Colton was standing frozen
at the end of the table.  His mouth made a small open circle
to match his scared eyes.  

“Dad!”  Katelyn yelled as she grabbed
his shoulder to stop him from reaching Kayla.  “Dad!
 She’s three years old!”

He pulled back quickly, shocked at her touch.
 He stood up and stepped in to yell at her.  “Excuse me?!
 Excuse me?!  Are you trying to boss me around now, too?
 That’s great.  And who do you think you are?”

Katelyn cowered slightly and averted her face
to the side, but she didn’t step back.  But, as she looked
down, she saw his hands clenched in fists.  She inhaled
sharply and then clenched her own jaw in anger.  Her dad would
never hit her.  He never had.  Her dad didn’t act like
this, except . . .  

His arm twitched.  She looked back at
his face.  All she saw was sick.   His eyes burned
dark and mean, but the yellow around the black-beaded eyes were
laced with red. His skin under the stubble of a day’s beard growth
was gray and blotched with low red bumps.  A scream started to
burn deep inside her.

“Leave her alone,” she hissed in a voice she
didn’t recognize.  His face tilted slightly in shock.
 She repeated herself louder.  “Leave her alone.”

Kayla’s cry was a hyper barking now.
 Jacob had joined the crying, too, in long drawn out screams.
 

“Well, that’s just great.  Not one kid
in this whole damn house—my damn house, for fuck’s sake—not one of
ya know how to show an ounce of respect.”

Katelyn cut him off and took a small step
into his face.  “No, Dad.  Respect!  Do you see how
you’re acting?!  Look at the kids—“

He cut her off, and she saw it coming but
couldn’t move.  His face curled into itself in a snarl and his
hands came up in what first appeared to be blocking her, but
quickly switched to pushing.  Katelyn took the full force of
his slamming hands on her shoulders and didn’t have time to get her
footing.  She fell back full on the floor and sat in
shock.

The kids screamed.

She stared out in front of her until the
screams sunk into a momentary shield around her brain.  He hit
me.  My dad hit me.  She turned her head from side to
side and froze on the pain-filled face of Sierra in the hallway.
 Sierra looked down on her from her hiding place around the
corner.  She didn’t look away as Katelyn held her gaze.

Movement caught her eye and she turned to see
her dad leaving quickly through the kitchen.  She heard the
door open and then the storm door slam behind him.  The glass
rattled in its frame.  

Katelyn picked herself off the floor and
turned to the hallway, but Sierra was already gone and Brianna’s
door shut tightly against her.  Colton pulled away from the
wall and slid down to squat in front of Kayla.  “Don’t cry.”
 He used a gentle voice Katelyn had never heard from him
before.  He sounded like a school nurse after a playground
scrape.  “It’s okay now.  Don’t cry.”

Katelyn followed her nephew’s lead and
scooped Jacob off the floor.  “Shhh.  It’s okay.
 Shhh.”  She looked out the window to see her dad’s stout
frame marching down the street away from them and a mess spread out
before her on the lawn.  “It’s okay now.  Everything will
be alright.”  Katelyn went into the kitchen and shut the entry
door against the cold.

Three hours later, she saw the headlights of
her mom’s car pull into the driveway.  She turned down the TV.
 Earlier, she made a deal with Kayla and Colton that they
could pick a movie if they took a bath.  Now, they were both
asleep on the couch beside her.  Colton had started on the
floor, but as he grew tired, he moved up to the couch and
eventually snuggled into her left side.  Kayla had snuggled to
her right side throughout the movie.  

Katelyn carefully slid herself out from their
grips, making sure to position their bodies comfortably with
pillows and blankets.  She met her mom in the kitchen as she
came in from the cold night.  Her mom looked hunched over
inside her baggy coat, her face flushed red from the damp air.
 She lifted her head in slight surprise as she saw Katelyn
patiently leaning against the counter.  

“Hey, what’s up?” she said in a soft voice
both equally weak and concerned.  

Katelyn let her mom put her purse on the
dining room table.  Katelyn didn’t answer right away, so her
mom took off her coat.  After she peaked around the corner to
confirm Kayla and Colton’s sleeping bodies on the couch, she came
back into the kitchen to head to the refrigerator.  “Sierra in
Brianna’s?” She didn’t look directly at Katelyn as she passed her,
but could see her nod.  “Jacob in the crib?”  Again,
Katelyn nodded.  Her mom had to turn to see the answer, but
Katelyn didn’t meet her gaze.  “Jodi ever call?”  Katelyn
shook no.  She waited for the question her mom was scared to
ask, the one already answered by the mess sprawled on the lawn and
the quiet of the house.  But, her mom didn’t ask about her
dad.

Her mom grabbed a kettle from under the stove
and filled it with water from the sink.  The rushing sound of
water interrupted the silence of the room.  “Want some hot
chocolate?”

Katelyn couldn’t switch from the words she
needed to say, the words burning in her throat, so she nodded
instead.  Her mom didn’t press her to speak.  “I know I
can nuke the water in the microwave, but there’s something so right
in boiling and pouring from a kettle that makes a perfect cup of
chocolate.”  She stood in front of the stove for a moment
after turning the burner to high.  When she turned to Katelyn
at her side, she crumpled when she saw her daughter’s torment.
 

Katelyn’s cheeks were wet and tears continued
to pool over her cheeks and drop onto her sweater.  When her
mother reached her arm around her shoulder, a sob exploded out of
Katelyn’s throat.  Her next breath hurt and came out in the
same sob.  Her mom put her other arm around her, and Katelyn
hung on while she cried until her cries ran out.  They sank to
the ground and sat embraced on the scratched linoleum, Katelyn
leaning on her mom.

Katelyn woke up the next morning to the
sounds of kids crying.  She stuffed a pillow over her head,
but could still hear them.  The situation crept into her mind:
Brianna was sleeping at a friend’s house; her dad left last night
and hopefully wouldn’t be allowed back in after her talk with her
mom; and her mom probably didn’t get to sleep until one or two.
 Katelyn was on kid duty.

Katelyn sighed and pulled herself off the
warm bed.  Her eyes hurt and she spent a minute rubbing them.
 It only made them worse.  Her throat was dry and stung.
 She headed out to the living room to find the cries coming
from Kayla on the couch.  Colton was already awake and had an
overflowing bowl of cereal in his hands.  He was watching
cartoons and ignoring Kayla with no problem.  

“Kayla,” Katelyn couldn’t hide her
irritation.  “What’s wrong?”

“Colton said my mommy’s not coming back, that
she left forever,” she said between sniffle interruptions, then she
went back into her full cry.

Katelyn went to her and picked her up, but
the weight was more than she expected, so she landed on the couch
beside her.  “No she didn’t, baby.  No she didn’t.”
 She pushed the flattened hair out of Kayla’s face.  “She
loves you very much.  She’ll be home soon.”  Kayla
started to quiet, and Katelyn finished her off.  “Hey?
 Hey?  How ‘bout we call her this morning and sing her a
song?”  Kayla’s face calmed and she nodded.  

“Colton, go eat that at the table.”
 Katelyn grabbed the remote from under him and shut the TV
off.  She grabbed his bowl and a small amount spilled onto the
carpet as he pulled against her.  “Now!” she shouted.

Katelyn went to the kitchen to get something
to drink and saw the time glowing from the microwave clock.
 8:07.  “Shit,” she muttered under her breath.
 Three minutes wasn’t going to be enough to get to school on
time.  The car was still broken.  She thought about
waking her mom for a ride, but didn’t.  Her mom had looked so
tired the night before.  Besides, Katelyn didn’t feel like
going to school.  She hadn’t studied for the two midterm tests
scheduled for today.  

Maybe mom will call me in for the morning
classes, she thought, and dismissed her worry.  The time might
be enough to get something done with her car.  

Tiptoeing down the hall, she went into her
room to get her phone and returned to the kitchen.  Colton was
back in front of the TV, lying on the floor this time.  Kayla
had filled the couch with her dolls and there was no room for him.
 

After five rings, the call went to Tim’s
voice mail.  “Hey, you must not be awake yet or maybe you’re
at work.  Call me as soon as you get this.  I don’t know
what to do with the car.  Bye.  Love ya.”  

Another hour later, after watching a cartoon,
getting Kayla breakfast, and checking online notices, Katelyn left
Tim another voicemail.  “Hey, did you get my last message?
 I need your help.  Call me, okay.  Love ya.”
 

Katelyn showered, woke Sierra up, made the
kids change out of the clothes they wore the day before, and
started a load of laundry.  When she came up from the
basement, her mom was in the kitchen.  “Why aren’t you at
school?”  Her voice was loaded with sleep and heavy with
smoker’s lung.

Katelyn pleaded her case. They argued.
 Her mom didn’t come around to her side.  “You’re going
to school,” she declared in her “final decision” voice.  It
wasn’t quite a yell, but it was the warning voice.

Her mom filled a coffee cup and turned her
back on Katelyn, walking to her customary seat at the table.
 She hacked with a nagging cough.

“I’m not goin’.”  Katelyn stuck her chin
in the air and braced for the fight.  

Her mom looked up at her.  Their eyes
locked.  Katelyn thought she saw a moment of sympathy, or
maybe it was pleading, but her mom’s voice was firm.  “You’ll
get your butt to school.”

Katelyn narrowed her eyes to a squinting
glare.  “Mom,” she started, but didn’t trust her words to come
out without swearing.  That would be the last straw before a
true blowout.  

“I’m taking Sierra over to Ames in about ten
minutes.  I’ll drop you off.  Sierra’s already late for
school.  You should have woke me up.”

Katelyn stomped down the hall in disgust.
 

In her room, she tried Tim again.
 Voicemail after two rings.  Katelyn wondered if he was
avoiding her now, sending her calls directly to voice mail on
purpose.  She went back out to the kitchen and grabbed the
phone book.  Her mom eyed her as she finished her first
cigarette, but didn’t say anything.  

Katelyn was used to looking something up by
searching the internet, so finding the shop Tim worked at took a
few minutes.  A few thin pages ripped with the force of her
turns.  

“University Garage and Tire, this is Jake.
 How may I help you?” The tone of Jake’s voice did not match
the polite intention of the greeting.  Katelyn hesitated, not
wanting to get Tim in trouble, but she continued.  

“Is Tim Felske there?”

The line was quiet except for the background
shop noises for a moment.  “No.  May I help you
today?”

A sigh of her own impatience escaped and she
found a better question.  “Does he work today?  I mean,
will he be in, like, is he scheduled to work today?”

“Jake” on the other end seemed to figure out
she wasn’t a customer and his voice lost any attempt to be polite.
 “Look, he isn’t here and he hasn’t shown up all week.”

“What?”

“Tim is no longer employed here, Sweetie, so
don’t be calling looking for him.”  The line went dead.
 

Her mom’s car pulled out of the driveway with
Jacob and Kayla in the back seat and Sierra in the passenger seat.
 Katelyn backed away from the window and figured she had at
least 40 minutes before her mom would return.  She had no
intention of being home when she returned.  Katelyn had
refused to get in the car.  Her mom finally left with a look
that held a promised fight.

Katelyn called Jen’s phone.  It was
still early, before 11, but maybe she’d answer.  She did.
 “What?”

“Mom’s on her way over to Ames to drop off
the Sierra and Colton at school.  She’s got your kids, too.
 I think she’s planning a drop in.”  Katelyn didn’t know
that for sure, but it was somewhat gratifying to put a little panic
in her sister’s life.  For all that Katelyn did for Jenny’s
kids, Jenny deserved a little stress.  

“Shit,” Jen already sounded in action over
the phone.  “We gotta clean this place up.”

“You and Jodi party last night?”

“Naw, hold on,” Jenny turned her voice away
from the phone and talked to someone harshly, but Katelyn heard it
all.  “Get up.  You gotta go.  Come on, wake the
fuck up!

“When did she leave?”  Jenny ended with
a barely stifled burp.

“Just now.  I think she’s after Jodi.
 She never called or showed back up for the kids.”

“She wasn’t here.  Shit, I don’t know if
Jodi’s even here now?”  Katelyn heard cans being cleared in
the background.