Precedent: Book Three: Covenant of Trust Series (20 page)

He shook his head and sat up. Don’t fall into that hole. Get the brain going somewhere else. “What do you think, Brad?” He reached over to his desk for one of Brad’s notebooks, and opened to the spot where he’d left off reading.

A prayer. An outline for a lesson or something on Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead. A gut-wrenching confession over snapping at a guy he worked with. “Good grief, ease up on yourself, man.” On the next page, Jack saw his own name and smiled.

The little guy’s here for something bigger, more than just connecting with Dad.

But what? Then as Brad started law school, the entries lost their spark. He complained about not sleeping, about God not answering him, about empty study times.

I don’t understand. Everything feels wrong, like I’m in a foreign country, where nothing makes sense. Everyone else is zipping along, but my wheels fell off. How do I get back on track?

Is this even the right track?

Exactly. Brad nailed the way he felt. And . . . he was going to explain how he got out of it. Jack grinned and flipped the page. He scanned the page, promising to go back and read it all later, until the word ‘seminary’ jumped out at him. This was it.

John twenty-one, toward the end after all the “Peter, do you love me” stuff. Jesus says, “Peter, I know you blew it, but I still want you. I still have a job for you. Now, I’m not gonna sugarcoat this. You take this job and it’s going to cost you your life. But I promise you, it’ll be worth it.” So then Peter looks at John and asks Jesus, “What about this guy? What’s he gonna do?” Jesus answers him, “Don’t you worry about anybody else, and what they’re doing . . .
you
follow Me.”
That’s it!!
I can’t look around at what my dad did, or what my grandpa did. I have to follow what He’s calling
me
to do. He’s calling
me
to seminary, to ministry, to minister to the people in this neighborhood.

Now if I can just tell my dad.

“
Oh Brad,” Jack said, “that’s perfect. That’s exactly it. I wanted to follow you, but Jesus wants me to follow Him.” He reread the entry. “‘You take this job and it’s going to cost you your life.’ Brad, did you know? You couldn’t have . . . But it did cost you . . . your life.”

He lay back on the bed with the notebook across his chest. “God, You did it. You answered my question. It’s not the mission, and doing what Brad did. If I really want to follow Brad’s lead, I’ve got to break out of what I think my ‘duty’ is. Brad couldn’t stay in law school because that wasn’t where You wanted him. I can’t work at the mission all my life because that’s not where You want me. Next questions. Where do You want me to go, and what’s it gonna cost? Is Mom part of that, or Shannon?”

Chapter 13

Impartation

Friday, July 25

Chuck watched himself in the mirror as he tied his necktie. Bobbi balked when he mentioned taking the day off. Maybe it would help her if she believed he was going on into work after all. He couldn’t focus on anything but the coming battle, though.

He lay awake most of the night, listening to her breathe, wondering where she would find the strength for this fight. Where would he? His life had become a runaway mine car, careening out of control, deeper into darkness, and he couldn’t seem to find any way to bolster his wavering faith.

He took his cell phone from the dresser and called Christine.

“
Mr. Molinsky, this is a bad sign,” she said.

“
Bobbi’s got a biopsy this morning.”

“
So soon?”

“
The doctor is almost certain it’s cancer. The biopsy will confirm that and give us a clearer picture of exactly what she’s dealing with.” Before Christine could ask him any more questions, he said, “I need you to clear my calendar.”

“
Mr. Molinsky,” she said, the gentleness in her voice calming him like a mother’s hug. “I don’t want to sound like I’m minimizing things, but I know God is doing something. I keep praying He’ll show you what that is real soon.”

“
That’s all I’m holding onto right now.” He snapped his phone shut and dropped it in the front pocket of his slacks. If God didn’t have a purpose in all this, there was no room left for hope.

As soon as he stepped out of his bedroom, he smelled bacon. Who was making bacon? It wasn’t Jack, his door was still closed. Surely Bobbi wasn’t . . . But she was. He found her standing over a skillet frying eggs.

She smiled at him. “Pick your jaw up so you can eat.”

“
I don’t understand.”

“
I don’t either, but I felt like making us breakfast.”

“
I’m not going to argue with that.” Chuck kissed her cheek. He hadn’t had bacon or anything fried since his trip to the emergency room. She engineered this to lift his spirits, to encourage him. That settled it. He had to get his act together now. She needed to focus on her own issues. “Did you sleep?”

“
Fairly well. You?”

Chuck shook his head. “I had a lot on my mind.”

She set two plates of eggs and bacon on the table. “Coffee or milk?”

“
Milk today,” Chuck said, taking a seat at the table. Bobbi poured him a glass of milk, then set the margarine and a jar of peach preserves on the table. She brought her coffee over and took the seat next to him. He held out his hand, and she slipped hers inside. “Lord, thank You for today, for this meal and for the little reassurances You give.”

* * *

Bobbi closed the front door behind her, leaning against it for just a moment, gathering the strength to move. The breakfast, the low-key biopsy and a quick lunch accomplished exactly what she needed them to. Chuck, renewed and reassured, went on in to work.

Following her routine, she checked the phone on the console table for messages from Shannon, and like every day for the past month, there were none. No missed calls even. Tomorrow, she’d start calling down the list of Shannon’s friends again. Tomorrow.

Tonight, Rita and Gavin were coming, and she needed some time alone, time to find something inside to draw from to get her through the evening. She brewed a cup of coffee, the Turkish blend again, and headed for her favorite spot, the love seat in the study. She slid off her shoes and settled in her corner. Chuck always sat on the left, and she always sat on the right. Always. That much was still predictable.

She felt a twinge of pain when she leaned against the armrest. The anesthesia was wearing off. Great. She shifted around and lay against the armrest, then she took a long drink from her coffee. Breast cancer would be predictable. That was oddly comforting. No more shocks or surprises, just a straightforward course of action. That should make it easier on everyone.

“
Mom?” Jack called from the entry hall.

Bobbi hadn’t even heard the door open. “In here.”

“
I smelled coffee. I knew you had to be here somewhere. How did things go?” He pulled the desk chair around and straddled it.

“
Okay, I guess. We’ll find out in a week or so.”

“
Find out what?”

“
Exactly what type of cancer it is, and what happens next.”

“
Dad went to work?”

“
Yes. I told him he’s going to have to cut his own pay if he didn’t.” Jack nodded, then his eyes wandered around the study. “What’s on your mind, Jack?”

“
I don’t know if I should say.”

“
Why wouldn’t you?”

“
I didn’t want you to think I wasn’t concerned about you. Mine’s pretty minor compared to cancer.”

“
I would love to talk about something else,” Bobbi said. She pushed herself up to sit on the love seat.

“
Well then, I think I might go to law school.” He looked just like Chuck when he grinned.

Bobbi smiled broadly. “Really?”

“
That’s not funny, is it? ’Cause I’m serious about it.”

“
Just ironic. Brad gave up law school for seminary, and here you are giving up seminary for law school.”

“
Well, I’m not entirely sure I’m giving up seminary, exactly.”

“
You’re going to do both?”

“
Maybe.”

“
Then what?”

“
Religious freedom advocacy law,” Jack said with a nod of his head at the end.

“
How long have you been thinking about this?”

“
How long have I been at work?” He checked his watch.

“
This just all came together, then?”

“
Yeah, it was crazy. I didn’t sleep last night.”

“
I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have told you about the cancer.”

“
Yes, you should have, but it’s a lot to think about. Anyway, I was reading Brad’s notebooks, which was a brilliant idea, by the way.”

“
You’re welcome.”

“
He had this entry after he read at the end of John where Jesus tells Peter not to worry about what anybody else is called to do. That’s what settled him on seminary. It was like a lightning bolt, Mom.” He slammed his fist into his open palm. “I can’t follow Brad any more than he could follow Dad and Grandpa Jim. It’s not what I’m supposed to do. Then I kinda slept on it.”

“
And woke up to law school?”

“
Yep, I reckon lawyerin’s in my blood,” Jack drawled. Bobbi rolled her eyes at him. “I couldn’t get it out of my head today. That has to be it. What do you think Dad will say?”

“
He’ll be thrilled. He could use some good news.”

“
Yeah,” Jack said. He drummed his hands on the desk. “I’m gonna go do some research online and see what I’m in for.”

“
Aunt Rita’s bringing dinner tonight about six.”

“
Outstanding!” Jack said as he stood up. He kissed Bobbi on the cheek and headed up to his room, taking the stairs two at a time.

Bobbi set her coffee cup on the desk and closed her eyes for a moment. Jack was back. Just to see him excited and animated, with something to shoot for, was priceless. He could lift her spirits in a way that no one else could. Maybe God knew that a long time ago when He brought Jack to them. Maybe God knew in the middle of all these disasters how much she would need Jack.

* * *

Promptly at six o’clock, the Molinskys’ doorbell rang. Bobbi roused herself from the love seat, but before she could slip on her shoes and answer the door, she heard Jack tromp down the stairs. “My favorite aunt,” he said.

“
I’m your only aunt, and you’re not getting any samples.” Rita jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow as she passed, all the while carrying a deep dish with potholders.

“
That cuts deep,” Jack said.

“
I’ve seen it all before. Joel was the worst.”

“
Is there more to bring in?”

“
Gavin may need a hand.” Jack trotted outside to help.

“
It smells wonderful,” Bobbi said. “Roast?”

“
Actually it’s stew,” Rita said. “Just the thing you want in the middle of summer when it’s ninety-five degrees outside.”

“
That’s why we have air conditioning. Come on back.” She led Rita back to the kitchen, where she set the dish on the counter. “Chuck set the dining room table, so we can have a real dinner.”

“
Gavin’s bringing the bread and a cobbler.”

“
Blackberry?”

“
Yes.”

“
Thank you. Chuck and the ki—, and Jack have been deprived this summer. I don’t think they’ve had decent dessert in months.”

“
I’m glad you finally let me do something.”

“
I know,” Bobbi said, dropping her eyes.

“
So you rested?”

“
Yeah, I spent the afternoon on the love seat. Anesthesia wipes me out.”

“
There’s more than just anesthesia at work,” Rita muttered.

Before Bobbi could defend herself, Gavin and Jack came in the kitchen with Chuck close behind. Everyone pitched in, and they got the food and the drinks to the table quickly and settled in for the meal. Gavin and Rita managed to keep the conversation moving, steering it toward lighthearted subjects like Cardinals baseball and the recent Heatley family reunion. Bobbi didn’t say much, but she worked to stay engaged.

Rita brewed a pot of coffee before serving the cobbler. Then with the dessert finished, she cleared the table and loaded the dishwasher. “I didn’t know I was getting a full service meal,” Bobbi said, following her sister into the kitchen.

“
It’s the least I could do.” Rita quickly wiped the countertop and began wrapping up the leftover bread. “You seem amazingly calm. Is that for real?”

“
I’m coping.”

Rita turned and faced her. “You’re lying.”

“
Rita, not now.” Not this fight. It took all her energy to convince Chuck she was okay. But Rita wouldn’t relent.