Priest (A Standalone Bad Boy Romance Love Story) (13 page)

She’d made me feel foolish for assuming
she wanted me. She’s just so damned flirtatious all the time. The truth be told,
though, that was just her personality, and maybe I was making too much of it this
time.

“Come on in,” I said, stepping back from
the door. “I’m sorry; this is just all new to me.”

She raised an eyebrow and said, “You’ve
been a priest for five years, now. Haven’t you had any friends over during that
time?” She carried her basket over to the table and started setting up like she
owned the place.

“Yes, but they were married couples, older
women, or men. I’m never lonely, but I don’t spend much time with people my own
age…much less people I have a history with. You and I dated…”

“A million years ago in high school.” She
was saying one thing, but her eyes were saying another. She let them slowly run
down my body, settling for way too long on my crotch.

I felt myself twitch. My mouth went dry,
and I had a lump in my throat. I swallowed hard and said, “Here, I’ll take
that,” I took the apple cider from her. I could feel her eyes on me as I took
it into the kitchen to pour it into two glasses.

When I came back out, she had dinner set
up. She’d brought it over warm, and it looked delicious. She had made oven
baked mac and cheese—one of my personal favorites—cornbread, and some shredded
tri-tip. I sat down with her and said, “This looks amazing. I haven’t had mac
and cheese like this since Grandma passed away.”

“She’s the one who taught me how to make
it; do you remember?”

“Yeah, that Sunday after church when it
stormed so badly you couldn’t get home.”

“I was secretly glad. I had such a great
time hanging out with your family. Your grandmother taught me how to make this,
we made chocolate chip cookies, and we all played Monopoly in front of the
fire. My family was never like that.”

I felt that stab in my gut I got every
time I thought about my family. Those were good times, but they hadn’t all been
like that. “It was a good day,” I said, simply.

I never wanted to think about the bad
times. I did pretty well keeping all of that at bay. Lily and I ate our meal
and had light conversation. She told me about her job, and I talked to her
about things that were happening at the church.

We cleaned up together and then went in to
watch the movie. “What movie is this?” I asked as she slid it into the DVD
player on the television.

She came over to the couch and sat down
next to me…a little too close. “It’s called
Unconditional
.
It’s a Christian movie about a woman who loses her husband and then her faith.”

I smiled. “You know, I’m allowed to watch
regular movies.” The church frowns on anything “R” rated, but they don’t have
to all be Christian-themed.

“I know that. But, it’s hard to find one
without sex and violence—both of which I know you wouldn’t approve of.” She
seemed to disapprove of me not approving of sex and violence. “This one looks
good.”

When the movie started, we were both
sitting up with about two inches of space between us. As it progressed and the
woman’s husband had died and she was grieving, Lily put her head on my
shoulder. I could feel her body jerk with tiny little sobs. I didn’t say
anything about her touching me; I thought she was just overcome by the emotions
of the movie.

Somewhere along the way, though, I felt
her move her hand and place it on my thigh. I was trying to ignore it and keep
my eyes on the movie, but she wasn’t just resting it there. She started out
rubbing that one spot…very lightly. It was enough for my cock to take notice,
however, and I could feel an erection coming on.

I shifted slightly, trying to give her a
subtle hint. She took it—but the wrong way. She moved her hand up to my stomach
and started strumming her fingers there.

Finally, I couldn’t take it any longer. I
grabbed her hand in mine with the intentions of moving it. She threaded our
fingers together, and strictly to keep from embarrassing her, I held on.

Towards the end of the movie, the woman
was learning how to love again and how to still believe in God. It was a good
story, and although the person I’d lost was my grandmother, it was slightly
similar to my own.

I was really into it when I felt Lily let
go of my hand and shift her legs so that they were draped across mine. Her
calves were now pressing into my crotch, and my erection returned with a
vengeance.

I stretched and yawned as the movie
started coming to an end, again trying to give her a subtle hint. She sat up
and put her legs on the floor.

I thought she was getting ready to leave
when suddenly she put both of her hands on my face and pulled me in for a kiss.
I felt her lips on mine and then her tongue. I didn’t open my mouth, so she
dragged it across my lips, tracing the outline of them slowly. My erection was
at full staff and aching as it pressed against the front of my jeans.

For a second, I almost lost myself and
then a picture of Daphne popped into my head. Yes, I saw the irony there, but
it stopped me. I pushed back from her and said,

“Lily, what are you doing?”

She gave me a knowing look. “You know what
I’m doing. I know you want me, Jace.” Her eyes flit to my waist, and she
smiled. She could see that I was turned on.

“I won’t tell anyone. I want you, too.
I’ve wanted you since we were kids. Let me make you feel good. You would love
it, Jace, and no one has to know…”

I stood up quickly—so quickly that I
almost knocked her over. Her words were meant to turn me on further, but they
were having the opposite effect.

“No, Lily! I’m a priest. I told you when
you first got here that this wasn’t even appropriate. What makes you even think
I’d want to take things to that level?”

She stood up inches away from me. “That
hard cock in your pants for one thing.” She reached for it, but I stepped back
again. I honestly had no desire for her to touch me.

I didn’t want to fight with her or hurt
her, so I said, “Lily, you’re not thinking clearly. I know you’re a better
Catholic than this. We can’t do this. I’d be breaking my vows, and you’d be
committing a carnal sin.”

She rolled her eyes and let out a small
growl. “Jesus, Jace! It’s sex! Priests have sex all the time. They just have to
be discreet. Have you ever read the
Thorn
Birds
? Books like that wouldn’t even exist if priests didn’t really have
sex. I can be discreet. I’ve been discreet before.”

I’m not sure what she meant by that, but I
didn’t care. I just wanted her to go now. “Priests do not have sex all the
time, Lily. If they do, it’s wrong.”

Then I said something that for the life of
me, I couldn’t understand; I hadn’t meant to share it at all, much less with
Lily. “If I could have those kinds of relations with a woman and my
relationship with God, Lily…it wouldn’t be with you.

“I’m sorry, but there’s someone else that
I’d have in a heartbeat, but even though I have feelings for her, I can’t have
her. All I feel for you is friendship, Lily. My body’s responses are just
hormones.”

She looked angry and narrowed her eyes at
me. “You were the only man who ever turned me down, you know that? The rest of
them jump at the chance. I know I’m hot, Jace. I work hard at it. I know you
think I’m hot. I can see it on your face…and in your pants. Last chance, Jace; I’ll
take you to heaven.”

What she was saying was both vain and
blasphemous. She’ll take me to heaven? No, she’ll send me straight to hell. “I
can’t, Lily.”

With an even angrier tone she said, “Fine!
You ruined the plans for my life once, Jace. You were supposed to marry me, not
God. We were supposed to have a life together.”

Her face softened again as she gave it one
last try, “You don’t have to be a priest; it’s just a job. I’m worth it.”

“It’s not a job, Lily. It’s a calling. I’m
really sorry, but you should go now.” She’d completely turned me off, the more
she had talked.

She went over to the table and picked up
her basket. She stomped angrily to the front door and stopped. “I don’t think I
can just be your friend, Jace.”

I just nodded. I was sad about that, but I
wasn’t going to sleep with her to prove I wanted to be her friend. We would
both regret it; I knew I would for sure.

CHAPTER
TWENTY-EIGHT

DAPHNE

I spent my day off running errands,
cleaning my apartment, and doing laundry. Anything to keep from thinking about
Jace, but it didn’t work. I still thought about him all the time. I wondered
what he was doing. I wondered if he was with Lily, and then I scolded myself
and then I wondered again.

I wondered if I was just a horny slut or
if he really was special. It felt like a lot more than lust, but I didn't have
anything to compare it to. When I was at work, I would imagine him walking in
the diner. When I was at home, I’d imagine him knocking on the door. When I
went to church on Sunday, I sat in the pew and tried to act like I was
listening to mass, when in fact, I was looking at him.

He was so perfect; I felt so drawn to him.
I couldn't concentrate on what I was supposed to be concentrating on when I
looked at him, not even church.

Contrary to what I’d been doing lately, I
loved my church. I loved God. I loved being a Catholic woman. I didn't want my
obsession, or whatever it was, with Jace to ruin that. But I didn't know what
to do about it.

Carla went with me to church and she tried
to get me to go over and talk to him after the service. I wanted to, but he was
surrounded by all of the “good” Catholics that had honestly listened to his
words during mass and had taken them to heart, I’m sure. He didn’t have time
for dredges like me.

So, I steered her out of the church in a
different direction so we could have lunch before she had to catch her bus
home. She didn’t miss how distracted I was during our meal and was well aware
of what was on my mind.

“Maybe you should just tell him.”

“Tell him? You mean go to my priest and
say, ‘Hey, I can’t think about anything but you. I get horny every time I look
at you.’ Is that what you mean?”

“It’s not the same as just going to your
priest and telling him that. You had sex with this guy.”

“Shh!” The waitress was walking by right
as she said that. “I realize that, Carla. But the night we did talk and I tried
to kiss him, he made it clear that what happened between us was over. Talking
to him is not going to help. As a matter of fact, it might make things worse.
Putting temptation in front of him repeatedly makes me a horrible person.”

“Okay, then here’s what you do. Your next
day off, you get dressed up really sexy and you go out. Don’t get drunk—that’s
dangerous when you’re alone. But have a drink or two and loosen up, baby girl.

“Find another guy to hook up with. Make
sure you ask him what he does for a living before you have sex with him and if
it’s not illegal or immoral, do it. Maybe that’s all you need… Sometimes all a
girl needs is a good lay.”

“Carla! That’s quite enough, thank you.
I’m not going to use one guy to get over another one.”

She rolled her eyes at me. “You know
nothing about men.”

“Why do you say that?”

She laughed. “Because it’s true, baby
girl. Men don’t think of being used for sex as being used. They love it. They
want you to use them. They’d stamp it into their foreheads if they could get
away with it: ‘please use me for sex, any time.’”

I laughed. “You have a very skewed
perception of men, you know that?”

“No, honey, I have a realistic perception.
Do this and get your mind off the priest. He’s hot, granted, but lots of hot
guys are out there just waiting for a hot girl like you. You’re killing
yourself here. You’re boxing yourself in.”

So there I was on Friday night, my first
day off since we talked, not taking Carla’s advice. I had on my shorts and my
tank. I ate a tuna sandwich for dinner and then set to eating gelato straight
out of the container and watching a movie on the Lifetime network as I hunkered
down on my couch.

I
don’t want to go out. I don’t want any other man than Jace. I’m messed up, I
know…but wouldn’t I be even more messed up if I added another one-night stand
to my list of offenses? I have no idea…

So,
I’m just going to sit here and eat my gelato before I screw anything else up
further. I will just sit here and relax and look forward to Sunday morning when
I get to see Jace again. Messed up, I know.

I was about half-way through the movie.
I’d finished the entire container of gelato and was seriously considering
turning in for the night when there was a loud banging on my front door.
What the hell? Who is at my door on a Friday
night?
I went over to the door and quietly looked out the peephole.
Son of a bitch! It’s my father. Shit! He
looks like hell, as usual.

He was unshaven and his clothes were dirty.
He looked like he’d had a plenty of whiskey already. I’d be willing to be that
he reeked of it. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest; I could actually
hear it inside my head. I felt like I could barely breathe, like something was
clawing at my throat. My chest was beginning to hurt and I was suddenly afraid
I was going to have a full-blown anxiety attack.

He pounded again. It sounded like he was
going to knock down the door.
Shit
! I
had tried to tell the cop that pressured me to get a restraining order that it
wasn’t going to help.

What was I supposed to do now? Throw a
piece of paper at him and that will make him leave? Maybe it would give him a
terrible paper cut. It’s crap and the police have to know it.

I got the restraining order the one time I
called the police on him; that was one of the most traumatic days of my life.
Yes, he’s a horrible man, but he’s my father.

The idea of calling the police on him
prior to that day had never even entered my mind, but I was trying to leave and
he wouldn’t let me. I knew if I stayed, my life would be what it was forever and
I couldn’t handle that.

I had to get out of there to save my life,
so I’d done what I had to do, and he had made sure I regretted it…so then I got
the restraining order. Worthless.

“Daffy! It’s me, Daffy! Open up!” He
banged again. How the hell did he find out where I was?
God, I hate it when he calls me that. It makes me sick. How did he find
me? I know that Carla wouldn’t tell him or Bethany… There was no one else.

I
put in a forwarding address at the post office…was that it? I never considered
that he’d be able to follow me that way. Damn it! It doesn’t really matter at
this point. He’s on my doorstep and he’s going to wake the dead.

One
of the neighbors will call the police if I don’t do something, but what? He’s
angry with me for leaving. I can’t let him in here. The only person I really
know here is Bethany and she’s at work tonight, not that she could really do
anything. Shit!

My head was pounding with the beat of his
fist on my door. I was beginning to panic. I didn't know what to do; I didn't
know who to call.

“Daffy!” He was screaming now, and I think
he was using his feet, too.

I suddenly realized that I do know one
other person in town, but would it even be appropriate for me to call him?
Would he come?

“Daphne Lynn Carter, you open this door
right now! We need to talk, and I’m not going away until we do! You don’t want
me to have to break it down, do you?”

Shit
!
I grabbed my phone and called Jace. It rang twice before he picked it up with a
sleepy, “Hello?”

Just as he did, my father beat on the door
again. This time it was louder. He was definitely kicking it. He was going to
break it or his foot soon. Either way, he wasn’t going away.

“Jace?”

“Daphne?” Suddenly, the sleepiness was
gone from his voice. “What’s wrong? What’s all that noise?”

I was whispering as I said, “Jace, I’m
sorry. I didn’t know who else to call. I don’t know anyone in town… I’m
scared…”

He sounded confused as he said, “Daphne
tell me what’s happening.”

I wiped the tears off my face with the
back of my hand and said, “It’s my father. He’s at my front door, and he’s
drunk. He’s threatening to kick down the door, Jace. He will, too, and then
he’ll hurt me.”

“Dear God!” I hated the sound of people’s
voices when they found out that my father is a monster. “Daphne, did you call
the police?”

“No. I can’t.”

“Why? Daphne, you need to call the
police!”

I know I sounded hysterical, but at the
moment, I just couldn’t think straight. “I can’t do that again! It didn’t do
any good last time and it made things worse! I’m sorry I called you.”

I started to hang up and he said, “Wait?
Again? He’s done this before? He hurts you, Daphne?”

“I don’t want to talk about that right
now, Jace. I need to find some help or he’s going to hurt me again. I’ll let
you go, I’m sorry.”

“No! I’ll be there, okay? I have to get
dressed, and I’ll be right there. Don’t let him in.”

“I won’t. I’m pretending I’m not even
here…but he still won’t leave.” My hands were trembling so hard I nearly
dropped the phone. My father kicked the door again, hard.

“I’ll be right there. It’s going to be
okay. Do you want to stay on the phone with me?”

“No, I want you to be safe driving over.
I’ll wait for you. Jace?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you,” I whispered. I disconnected
the call, reluctantly, and slid against the wall to the floor. I sat there with
my arms wrapped around my knees, shaking and crying and hoping like hell that I
hadn’t done the wrong thing by calling Jace.