Punishing for Pleasure (4 page)

Dex had gone on alert when he’d spotted Kelly Mason standing off to the side watching Meri with narrowed eyes. The woman was a straight up bitch in his opinion, and her body language fairly well shouted her disdain for Merilee Lanham. The instant the scrawny prick Dex had seen the demon-woman talking to earlier got to his feet, the hair on the back of his neck stood up as if a wave if static electricity had rolled over him. He growled, “Let’s go” under his breath and started moving forward knowing Ash was right behind him. Dex was grateful he and Ash had already moved closer to the small makeshift stage during the first part of the question and answer portion of the program. They hadn’t anticipated trouble, they had simply not wanted
Ms. Lanham
to slip away before they had a chance to speak with her.
Oh yeah, sweet cheeks
,
we are definitely going to have a nice long chat about transparency and the fact that lying by omission is the same as flat-out deception.

The reporter’s question had rattled Meri, but Dex had been damned impressed with how quickly she’d recovered. He also wanted to howl with laughter at the icy response the little prick had definitely deserved.
If that boy isn’t from the south
,
he probably doesn’t know
he’s just been filleted with a smile.
Dex hadn’t been raised in Texas, but he would have recognized that smile a mile away. He'd been gifted with the same expression by his sweet mama back in Georgia on more than one occasion. And even though both of his older sisters had left the South, they hadn’t lost their ability to flash that same smile—
seems once a genteel lady learns that particular lesson, they keep it.

Since Ash hadn’t questioned him, Dex was sure he had also noticed Kelly Mason chatting up the little prick who had just sent a flash of pink into the perfectly tanned cheeks of Ms. Lanham. A quick glance to his side confirmed his suspicions. The lines of strain around his friend’s eyes and mouth told Dex just how close Ash was to grabbing Mr. Nosey-Reporter up by the scruff of his neck and escorting him into a nice secluded alley to chat. They had both worked personal security for Jax and Micah a few times, so it was easy to assume that don’t-fuck-with-me posture when they’d stopped a few feet to Meri’s left. She hadn’t seen them approach—another thing they’d be talking to her about—until she noticed the change in the reporter’s expression.

“If he so much as flinches I’m snatching him up by his short and curlies…what a pissant.” Dex had to hold back his smile at Ash’s threat, it wasn’t that he considered it empty, because Dex had known Ash Moore since they’d both been pea-green recruits, and knew what his friend was capable of. They’d gone through Basic Training and BUD/S together, discovering they had actually grown up just a few miles apart. The fact they hadn’t met until they were adults was likely a godsend considering what a holy terror Dex had been. They’d bonded quickly and considered themselves brothers in every sense of the word except blood. Dex doubted there would ever be a situation where he couldn’t predict within a microsecond how and when Ash was going to react. No, Ash’s threat was amusing because it was just exactly what he’d been thinking himself.
Yes, indeed…b
attered and bruised would be a nice look for the
little twerp.

Thankfully the hospital’s CFO managed to pull himself away from Meri’s assistant long enough to step forward and politely thank everyone for coming. His words essentially ended the informal question-answer portion of the gathering. Even though he was grateful, Dex wanted to shake both men for being so distracted they hadn’t managed to look out after the guest of honor. The financial officer seemed to be completely infatuated by Mr. Best Dressed Look-at-me Tony Ballard. Fuck it, both of them were the kind of men that made every woman they passed do a double take. It stood to reason they had to be reasonably intelligent, but Dex was betting both men struggled to keep their personal lives on an even keel. Dex recognized the barely contained hunger in two men’s eyes, still—he vowed to remind Mr. Ballard that a large part of his job as Merilee’s assistant revolved around keeping his lovely boss safe.

While the pretty-boy CFO encouraged members of the audience to watch for further announcements and updates, Dex wanted nothing more than to lead Ms. Lanham through the crowd and right out to his truck. But he stood quietly beside Ash and watched—everything. His eyes continually scanning the area for possible threats. Old habits weren’t always worth breaking and he couldn’t shake the feeling there was more than one threat milling close. Even though he didn’t get the impression the reporter who’d questioned her about her ex was a threat in a physical sense, he could certainly hurt her professionally. Dex knew enough about women to know the fall-out of having her
kinks
exposed would be emotionally devastating, and that was what worried him the most, he’d always sensed a vulnerability in Meri. She was a borderline masochist who didn’t have a strong enough sense of self-preservation in Dex’s opinion. But even more significant was the fact she was also a submissive who would always see herself in whatever she saw reflected in her Master’s eyes, so she could easily let things go too far seeking his approval.

Merilee Lanham’s pleasure during a scene was so closely linked to pain, Dex wondered if she’d be able to orgasm without it.
That is something we need to work on.
But outside of that specific dynamic, she was a “pleaser” of the highest order. Her happiness was dependent upon making the other people in her life happy. If she belonged to them, Dex knew for certain one of their biggest challenges would be teaching her to recognize and respect her own limits. He doubted the woman ever said no to anyone—hell, she’d probably run herself into the ground helping others if they didn’t monitored her closely.
Oh
,
Ash and I will
d
efinitely
stop that nonsense in short order.

They gave her a few minutes to say her good byes and as soon as they saw her assistant moving toward Meri, they both stepped forward flanking her. Their synchronized movement made it look as if they’d rehearsed it and Dex had to hold back his smile at the impressed expressions on the faces surrounding them.
If
they
only knew how many times we really have drilled and practiced
that particular move in preparation for
everything from hostage rescues to
escorting prisoners
,
they
wouldn’t be so awestruck.

When he wrapped a large hand around her upper arm and began leading her toward the door, she stiffened, “What are you doing? I’m not ready to leave yet. You can’t just manhandle me out of the room you know.” Meri’s voice was little more than a quiet hiss and Dex wanted to laugh at her lame attempt to avoid being alone with them.
Good luck with that, sweetheart.

“Be still or we’ll chat right here…and I don’t think that is in your best interest, do you?” Dex didn’t change his expression or slow his pace, he just kept walking. He could see the wrinkles around Ash’s eyes—it was usually the only outward sign when the man was enraged—and Dex knew his friend well enough to know he was just a few heartbeats away from giving the gorgeous woman between them a thrashing she’d never forget. If she thought the beating she’d gotten for her comments to Tobi had been bad, she’d be getting one a whole lot worse unless she played her cards very,
very
carefully.

*****

Ash was straight up pissed off. He wanted to lead Merilee D. Lanham into the nearest housekeeping closet, strip her bare, and beat her ass until she understood there was absolutely no difference between lying with words and deception with silence. But he wasn’t going to say one word until he got her through the throng of dignitaries and reporters that seemed to be continually trying to cut off their escape.
The next asshole who tries to step between me and th
e
fucking door is going to get steamrolled.

There wasn’t any doubt that he was mad as hell at Meri, but if Ash was honest—and he always tried to be—he was angrier at himself for not realizing how much more there was to the woman that he and Dex had been spending time with. Talk about your newbie Dom mistake. Hell, this was a beginner-level fuck-up of epic proportions…it might even make it into a training manual or two. When he started to lift his hand to run it through his hair, a gesture even he knew was one of his few
tells
, he cringed at the sharp pain that accompanied the quick movement of his injured arm.

Meri hadn’t missed his wince and looked over at him, concern clouding her pretty green eyes. “Are you alright? Oh frog-eating fairies, of course you aren’t alright. Damn that was a lame question. What happened to you?” Ash caught the twitch in Dex’s jaw and silently willed his friend to keep his mouth shut, he didn’t intend to be derailed by explaining his humiliation. God only knew there would be countless retellings of the tale, she could catch one of those.

“This isn’t about me. This is about you, pet, and you damn well know it.” He almost ran over a couple of rag-tag reporters who thought they would stop if the scrawny pricks stepped into their path…
wrong
. Ash could sense her assistant trailing after them and even with his back to the man, Ash’s gay-dar was pinging off the chart. Personally, Ash didn’t give a rat’s ass what the man’s sexual preference was, what occurred between other consenting adults wasn’t his concern. What he did care about was the fact the twerp had been so busy flirting with the hospital’s CFO that he hadn’t been watching out for his boss. “Did you drive here?”

“Yes of course, I dr—”

Ash cut her off with a curt command, “Give me your keys.” When she hesitated, he practically growled, “Now,
Meri
.” He’d deliberately used the correct pronunciation of her name, and he was sure she hadn’t missed the thinly disguised dig. Without even breaking stride, Ash turned and tossed the keys to her assistant. “She’ll be with us.” Ash could see the muscles in Dex’s jaw flexing as he tried not to laugh at the huffing sounds of the man behind them scrambling to retrieve the keys he obviously hadn’t managed to catch.
The man has nerd written all over him
,
not surprised he didn’t manage a simple catch, but at least it slows him down a bit. We might actually make it to our truck before he has security on our tails.

“This isn’t at all necessary, you know. We could have easily met somewhere later for coffee and discussed whatever is bothering you.” Meri’s voice had moved from flustered to indignant. Ash hoped she could hold on to that self-righteous attitude for a while because it would just add to her punishment, and right now he was most certainly in a punishing mood.

“You might want to dial it back a bit, sweetheart, because you’re already in a whole peck of trouble.” Ash and Dex had been hearing that particular expression their whole lives, but the little wrinkle that appeared between Meri’s eyes told him she didn’t have a clue what Dex had just said to her…
she’ll cipher it out soon ‘nuf.
Smiling to himself, he realized the only time he fell back on his southern roots in his speech was when he was dancing on an emotional edge. All his Special Forces training had robbed him of even the slightest hint of his previous southern accent—something his sweet mama had complained endlessly about when he’d first become a SEAL. Now that he was living in Texas, he’d noticed bit by bit his accent was beginning to resurface—yes indeed, his mama was going to be happy as a clam.

Moving quickly through the parking lot toward the pick-up they’d driven, Ash noticed Meri was having trouble keeping up in the heels she was wearing and slowed his pace. Dex must have noticed as well because he’d given Ash’s bandaged arm a considering look and all but laughed when Ash slowed. Sure, any other day Ash would have simply scooped Meri up in his arms and continued on, but his damned arm was throbbing like a bitch and he was worried he might actually drop her if he tried his usual Tarzan-routine.

Meri was starting to lose patience with their thunderous expressions and curt answers. She’d asked them where they were taking her when they’d pulled out of the hospital’s parking lot and Ash’s response had been, “If you have anything planned for this evening, cancel it and then hand me your phone.”
Presumptuous bastard.
And if Tony wrecks my car I’m going to skewer them both.
How dare they give him
the
keys
to her baby
.
She loved him like a brother, but her assistant was one of the worst driver’s ever to sit behind a steering wheel and he’d been nagging her to let him drive her car ever since she’d owned it.

She would have told them she didn’t have any plans if they had simply asked, but Ash’s barked command grated on her last nerve. Sure she was a submissive, but that didn’t mean she was a doormat.
Damn Doms anyway
. Just to be cantankerous, she dialed her private number at the office and left a message explaining she’d been kidnapped by a couple of crazies and the authorities should review the tapes from the presentation at the hospital if her staff hadn’t heard from her by morning.

She’d sworn she’d heard them both growl and Dex’s hands were now gripping the steering wheel so tight she worried it might snap. The muscles along the side of his jaw clenched so tight she wondered if it might shatter as well. Ash took the phone from her hand, switched it to vibrate, and then slid it into his pocket. “That little stunt will cost you ten.” When she turned to glare at him he added, “Be very careful, pet. The tally is already higher than you can cover in one session, you might want to measure your words very carefully.”
Sure
,
threaten me with something I love. What a dumbass
. I’
m a masochist
,
you dim-wit. I like pain…probably ought to be thinking up something else if you intend to call it punishment.

Meri had already had her fill of men today so they weren’t going to get any huge concessions from her. She’d show them carefully measured words.
Let’s see how they like no words at all.
She simply turned and stared out the windshield tuning out everything happening around her. Thinking back over the past few hours, Meri wondered how her life had managed to spiral out of control so quickly. Her assistant, Tony, was the only man she’d been near who hadn’t been a total jerk, but even he drained her emotionally. Tony was probably the closest thing Meri had to a best friend, but his love life was such a train wreck the drama surrounding him made the Kardashian’s look like they belonged in Mayberry.

The hospital administrator had been propositioning her for months, but he had certainly decided to step up his game today. He’d slid his bear paw sized hand down over her ass when he’d greeted her with a hug that had lasted entirely too long to be considered professional. And when he’d pressed her against a yawn-inspiring erection she’d felt herself shudder, a reaction Meri was certain he’d misinterpreted. If the two jerks sitting on either side of her wanted someone to play the pissy-card with, they could start with him if you asked her. Then, just before the presentation started, two members of the board of directors had sidled up beside her to ask if she’d like to join them at their “clothing optional” retreat this coming weekend. The thought of seeing either of them without clothes made her want to stab herself in the eyes with a blunt instrument. She’d been unable to suppress the small shake that had gone through her as
that
mental picture flashed in her mind again.

And then…the grand finale had been the fiasco with the reporter she’d seen Kelly chatting with. His sneer and expression of barely disguised contempt by the end of the presentation had surprised her. She’d been so lost in trying to figure out why a stranger would dislike her so intensely she’d almost missed his questions. When the words had finally registered, several seconds had passed when all she could do was stare at him with her mouth gaping open in disbelief. She hadn’t even been able to form a coherent thought, let alone a response fit for a public venue.

She’d been flustered and Merilee Dillon Lanham
did not do
flustered…well at least she never had before she’d learned two of her childhood acquaintances had opened a kink club just outside of Austin. Meri’s entire life had been centered on being groomed to follow in her father’s footsteps. Business journals all over the country were referring to her as “Fundraising’s Golden Girl”. She was well on her way to establishing herself as one of the nation’s top foundation leaders. And through all those years of preparation for this role, her mother hadn’t let Meri’s business education push aside or overshadow all her earlier lessons in gentility either. Diana Dillon-Lanham made sure her daughter knew exactly how to present a public persona that was precisely what everyone expected…and Meri had performed flawlessly until the day she’d gotten up the courage and called Kent West.

Even though their parents ran in the same social circles, Meri had never known either Kyle or Kent well, but their paths had crossed often enough over the years that Meri knew Kent was the more approachable of the two. It had only taken her a few days to discretely set up their lunch meeting. Thinking back on that day still sent a flash of embarrassment through her and she hoped the two men sitting beside her were too caught up in their anger to notice. “Want to share that thought, pet? And I’ll advise you to give your fondness for
editing
some serious reconsideration.” Ash’s words might have sounded casual, but the steel under them was pure command.
Damn Dom thinks he can just waltz in and make demands like he’s the
king
of all he surveys. As if…

She took a minute to think through the wisdom of the snark that had initially popped into her head and decided this wasn’t a battlefield worth dying on. Meri took a deep breath and sighed. “I was just remembering how hard it had been to call Kent West when I first heard about the club he and Kyle had opened. I met him for lunch and it was…well, let’s just say it was an interesting conversation.” She’d wanted to meet at Uchi, but Kent had just laughed and told her that raw fish was bait. Meri hadn’t been surprised when he’d suggested Jeffrey’s, it was an upscale establishment, and served enough steak and potato fare to keep even the purest Texas heart happy. Add in the gorgeous bar and it was perfect. In the end she’d been grateful because a happy, relaxed dinner companion was much easier to talk to than one who was continually frowning at his plate.

“Why did you call Kent? Were you friends?” She knew Ash had tried to keep his questions nonchalant, but she hadn’t missed the tinge of jealousy he’d tried to suppress.

“Not really, but we were acquaintances. Our families’ circles of friends overlap some, so we’ve all known one another for years. You don’t have to know Kent and Kyle well to be able to see Kent is the more personable. And since I was already nervous about the meeting…well, you know.” She felt her face heat again and cursed the fact she blushed so easily even though she always looked like she’d just returned from the tropics. She had her dad to thank for her perpetual tan and dark hair, but her sparkling green eyes had definitely been a gift from her mom.

Meri felt her heart clench when she thought about her parents. God she missed them even though they’d only been gone a few weeks, but on days like today it seemed like forever. Taking a deep breath to push back the tears she felt starting to fill her eyes, Meri tried to focus on how much the two people she loved the most deserved this time of freedom. This past year they had actually been gone on so many “adventures” as her mom called them, that Meri was finally—reluctantly, very reluctantly—starting to adjust to being alone in the enormous home they all shared. Granted she had lived in the mansion’s west wing since she’d been sixteen. Her mom had called it “Autonomy Training”. Meri smiled as she thought back on all the different parenting strategies her mom had tried. Through it all, her dad had just smiled and continued to listen and guide with a steadfast consistency that had given Meri the foundation to become the woman she was now. Her mom had given her imagination and wings, she’d opened her daughter’s mind to trying new things, but her dad was the one who had always been rock solid.

Glancing to the side, Meri saw Ash watching her, studying her as if he’d be able to figure out what she was thinking if he just looked closely enough. And for just a sliver of a moment she wondered if it might be right. She’d never been good at deceit, and even though she had known Dex and Ash weren’t aware of who she was, it hadn’t been a problem because their confusion hadn’t been due to any deception on her part. They had made a number of wrong assumptions without bothering to find out more about her. And if she had to guess, she’d put her money on the fact they were actually more angry at themselves, but it was just easier to take their frustrations out on her. She had no intention of letting them off that easy. They were making a big mistake letting her have so much time to stew over this…yes indeed, a very big mistake. The longer she thought about it the more downhill her attitude was sliding.
You want my respect outside of the club, asshats? Earn it.

*****

Dex might have been driving but that didn’t mean he was oblivious to the anger beginning to radiate off the woman sitting close enough he could feel the warmth of her sweet body. He knew Ash’s arm had to be throbbing like a bitch, but dammit, the man had been a SEAL, so a little bit of pain was no reason to act like a jerk. And despite his attempts to disguise it, Dex had seen Ash’s eyes practically turn green with jealousy when Meri had mentioned calling Kent about the club. Personally he was thanking God above she’d made that call, otherwise they might have never met her, and despite their rough start, Dex really did enjoy her company. They hadn’t spent a lot of time together in social situations, but those few times had given him a glimpse of the woman aside from the sub they loved playing with at Prairie Winds. And what he’d seen today had upped the stakes of his interest exponentially.

Time for some damage control. “Tell us about the new hospital wing, Meri. We aren’t far from our destination, but it sounds like a really ambitious undertaking and I’m interested in hearing about it.” Dex was headed to a small overlook a few miles from the club. He’d decided a neutral setting was best and since this spot was on private property, they would all be able to speak openly without worrying about being overheard. He was glad to see some of the tension drain away as she started telling them about the vision she and her parents shared for community improvement. She said her dad’s entire career had been spent managing the family’s charitable foundation. She’d followed in his footsteps, getting her MBA from Harvard and then starting in an entry-level position.

By the time they’d parked the truck under one of the sprawling oak trees, Meri and Ash seemed to have calmed down and Dex was surprised at the relief he felt about that. There had been a small part of him that had worried Ash was going to blow their chances with her, and this was the first time it had ever mattered. It wasn’t that Dex wasn’t frustrated, but since he’d had a chance to step back a bit, he’d been able to see he was actually far more frustrated with himself than he was with her. That didn’t mean she hadn’t earned a punishment round or two, but they’d have to be careful because the woman was a borderline masochist and most traditional punishments were actually rewards for her.

“Where are we?” The sun just getting ready to settle behind the horizon and the first stars were beginning to sparkle in the violet sky. It would be dark soon and he understood her trepidation. She’d basically been kidnapped by two men she knew were angry with her and taken to a hillside overlooking the river, and they’d taken her phone away from her. Dex would have been more upset if she hadn’t asked, because even though they’d never hurt her beyond the limits they all still respected, it wasn’t something she should assume outside of a club setting.

The club had a zero tolerance policy for anyone not following the BDSM lifestyle tenet
Safe, Sane, and Consensual
,
but Meri couldn’t be sure those same rules still applied here. At Prairie Winds, any applicant who wasn’t completely on board with that policy was denied membership; it was just that simple. But the truth of it was the vetting process for prospective members was so stringent and thorough, it was rarely an issue. During the months he and Ash had been working there, they’d only seen dungeon monitors step into a scene a few times, and each of those had been at the Dom’s request. It wasn’t unusual when a Dom was new or topping a sub they didn’t know well, to ask a more experienced Top for suggestions—or at least it wasn’t unusual for the
smart ones
to ask for guidance.

Dex turned in his seat so Meri would be able to see him clearly. It was important she understood that no matter what the outcome of their discussion, she would always be safe in their care. “We are on a small acreage of private property not far from the club. It’s quiet here and we won’t have to worry about being overheard.” He saw a small flash of something too close to fear flash in her eyes and he realized she’d misunderstood what he’d been trying to say. “What I was trying to say, sweetness, was that we would all be able to speak freely without being concerned about being overheard. If we’d met in a coffee shop as you’d suggested earlier, we wouldn’t have been about to speak as openly as we can here.” He paused to study her expression, wanting to avoid any further miscommunication. “You know you are safe with us, right?”

Ash’s face turned sharply toward him and his eyebrows furrowed as he considered Meri might actually be worried about her safety. If there was one thing Dex knew about his friend, it was that despite the fact Ash considered himself a sadist, he would never intentionally harm a woman in a way they hadn’t all agreed to before starting a scene. Ash was meticulous about the well-being of all submissives and had always been practically obsessive when it came to Meri. Hell, Dex had often accused Ash of negotiating scenes to death because he’d scripted scenes so tight there hadn’t been any spontaneity left at all, and the result had often been scenes that were as flat as yesterday’s open beer.

Dex could see Ash was barely breathing as he waited for Meri to answer. When she finally nodded her head, they both let out the breaths they’d been holding. “I’m glad you asked where we are, sweetheart. Your safety is always going to be our first concern and it should be yours as well. We’ll never punish you for asking questions related to your safety—but we’ll reserve the right to punish you anytime you
don’t
take care of yourself.” Even in the fading sunlight, Dex could see her muscles relax ever so slightly at the familiar words. Any Dom worth his salt insisted any submissive in his or her care was to take their safety seriously. Dex opened the door and reached for Meri’s hand, “Come. We need to talk, but we want to show you something first.”

Standing at the edge of the rock wall edging the river, Dex heard Meri’s sharp intake of breath as she looked out over the vista below. They weren’t particularly high, but the wide-open view was spectacular. From where he’d parked, she wouldn’t have been able to see any of the spectacular features of the property, so they’d moved quickly into a position to see the setting sun paint the sky with shades of pink and orange that were quickly fading into deeper shades as they shifted to violet. Mother Nature was showing off this evening and it was breathtaking.

Dex saw Meri’s eyes widen when she looked around, he had expected her to appreciate the view, but he hadn’t expected her to look up at him with tears in her eyes. “It’s amazing. I never take time to enjoy things like this anymore and I should.” She must have seen his confusion because she pointed to the mansion on the next hilltop, “That’s where I live. Well, specifically I live in the west wing, my parents live in the east wing. This view is available to me every night from the balcony off my bedroom, but I don’t take the time to enjoy it.”

Dex watched as Ash stepped up behind Meri and wrapped his arms around her, “And you think by not enjoying it, you’re being wasteful.” It hadn’t been a question, but Dex had seen her nod anyway. Typically, Dex was the one who comforted the subs in their care while Ash pushed them, but there was something special about Merilee Lanham, and it warmed his heart to see a softer side of Ash emerging.

While Ash held Meri, Dex looked at the enormous home belonging to Meri’s family. What they hadn’t yet told her was the two of them had purchased this land a few months earlier. They were in the process of designing a “green” home and hoped to break ground on the project sometime in the next year. They’d wondered about the owners of the sprawling mansion because they would eventually become their nearest neighbors, and now that he knew—he wasn’t sure if he was relieved or worried.

Dex was glad neither Meri nor Ash seemed as keyed up as they had been earlier. He watched her slip off the four-inch heels she’d been wearing and lean back stretching out the muscles of her neck and back. They all sat dangling their legs over the edge of the sheer rock face that dropped to the river below. For just a few moments Dex felt as if they were all teens enjoying a night at Lookout Point back home. Sadly, his and Ash’s years as Navy SEALs had changed them. They were no longer the idealistic young men who had started Basic together, so sure they could change the world. They’d both become jaded in a lot of ways over the years. Dex hadn’t realized how much he’d changed until he’d returned home one Christmas. He’d been leaning against the back wall of his parents’ large living room watching the chaos when his sister, Lizzy, stepped up to him and smiled warmly. He’d instinctively shaken the hand she’d extended but he’d been completely confused when she’d introduced herself.

When he’d asked, “What’s this about, Lizzy? You know exactly who I am.”

“No, I don’t think I do. You look like my little brother, but when I look into
your
eyes, I don’t see
him.
” He’d been too stunned to respond. She’d looked at him cautiously, but had finally added, “If you see him, would you please tell him that I love him…we all do. And that we miss him very much and that we hope he’ll find his way back to us soon.”

Dex still remembered feeling as if he’d been sucker punched. It had been a life-changing moment and he’d wondered for just a few seconds if he’d been hit by lightning standing right in the middle of his parents’ home. Elizabeth was seven years older than Dex and she’d always considered herself his second mother, so he wasn’t surprised she was taking him to task. What tore at his heart was the absolute truth of her words. From then on, Dex had made a sincere effort to conceal the way his career was changing him—at least he’d tried to hide the worst of it from his family.

Oddly enough, the more he’d consciously set aside the turbulence he felt in his soul, the calmer he’d actually become. He and several other teammates had been discussing the efforts they had to make to hide the atrocities of war from their loved ones one night after returning from a particularly difficult mission. The whiskey had loosened them up enough they’d actually broached an emotional topic for a change. One of the men’s wives had quietly said, “Created reality.” When he’d questioned her, she had gone on to explain how we choose our reality by allowing or disallowing certain thoughts to occupy our minds.

Dex had stared at her as the absolute truth of her words hit him like a Mack truck. She’d just smiled shyly and said, “You hold all the power you know…you can let all the horrible things you see taint your future or you can learn from them…it’s always your choice.” He’d been stunned by the simplicity of her words and the fact two different women had sensed how emotionally adrift he’d been was more than a little humbling.

Looking at Meri—her eyes so filled with wonder and appreciation of the beauty surrounding her, Dex couldn’t help feel she held his heart in her hand already, but neither of them had been notified yet.
Oh brother, you really have fucking lost it and if Ash gets wind you’ve detoured into the deep end of the romance pool
,
there will be no living with him.
Dex finally broke the silence by saying, “Tell us why you didn’t tell us who you are.” He knew his comment lacked any sort of finesse, but the words had tumbled out before he’d had the chance to polish them.