Ravensong (28 page)

Joshua expelled his held breath and
let his head fall back against the tiled wall. “I’m
fine.”

“
You sure.”

“
Yeah, I’ll be out in a
minute. I just need a little time.”

“
Okay, but
Rage
is done and they’re
setting up the stage right now.”

“
Got it,” said Joshua,
fighting annoyance. “I’ll be out in a minute, please.”

Dominic didn’t answer for a moment.
Joshua knew he’d do one of two things: guard his privacy or break
the door in.

“
You got five, man,” came
the answer.

Joshua gave a miserable bark of
laughter, then lowered his head in his hands and closed his eyes
again.

* * *

Elena looked up as Joshua entered the
backstage party. He stumbled to a halt, clearly surprised by all of
the people Julian had invited. His hair was still damp from his
shower and his face looked tired and drawn. Elena felt a wave of
concern wash over her.

She rose to her feet and wound her way
through the people. No one seemed too interested in her, letting
her pass without a problem. She hoped she could make it to Joshua
before they became aware of him. He wouldn’t be so
anonymous.

His eyes fixed on her and
he reached for her elbow. She moved close in against his side so
she could talk to him over the loud voices.
Avalanche
music pulsated in the
background, Joshua’s sultry voice weaving among the swaying
bodies.

“
What the hell is this?” he
said, shifting his gaze to the crowded room.

She shrugged. “Julian’s doing. He must
have given out three times as many backstage passes as
usual.”

Joshua’s jaw clenched.

“
Are you all right?” she
asked.

He nodded, still staring at the moving
bodies.

“
Joshua, what’s going on?
You’ve been acting different all night. What did Julian say to you
before the concert?”

He pulled his gaze from the room and
refocused on her. “Nothing. I’m fine.” His voice didn’t sound
convincing. Elena grew more concerned.

“
I saw him talking to you
and then you went into the bathroom.”

Joshua sighed. “Elena, I’m fine. He
didn’t say anything or if he did, I didn’t hear him.”

Elena knew he was lying, but she
didn’t feel secure enough in their relationship to press him any
further. She wanted trust between them. With both of their pasts,
it was essential. “Do you want a drink?”

He hesitated, his eyes moving out into
the room again. A frown appeared on his brow. “I think I’ll just
take the limo back to the hotel.” He looked at her again. “Do you
mind?”

“
No, of course not. Do you
want me to come with you?”

He fingered a curl. “No, stay and
enjoy yourself. I might tinker on Bobbie’s keyboard for a little
while, jot down some notes, then probably go to sleep. I’m
tired.”

She tried to still the anxiety his
words provoked. Trust was so difficult for her. “Take Dominic with
you.”

“
Of course,” he said,
then he forced a smile. It didn’t reach his eyes. “Don’t look so
worried. Really, I’m fine. Just tired. Besides, I don’t feel too
welcome at the moment.” He nodded at the other
Avalanche
members.

Elena glanced over at them. He did
have a point. This reason eased some of the stifling worry inside
of her. “I understand,” she said, then wrapped her arms around him
and held him close for a moment.

He returned the embrace without
hesitation, holding her tighter than she expected. Finally he let
her go and lowered his head to press his lips to hers. He kissed
her breathless, then released her. “Wake me up when you get back,”
he said, giving her a wink. The gesture was so Ravensong that Elena
felt the last of her concern slide away.

He slipped out the door and Elena
caught a glimpse of Dominic looming in the background, waiting for
him.

“
Where the hell is he
going?” said Julian behind her.

She turned, hoping to block him from
going after Joshua. “Back to the hotel. He’s exhausted.”

Julian narrowed his eyes on the door.
“I have people that want to meet him.”

“
I’m sorry,” she
answered.

Julian glared at her. “He’s acting so
strange. Is he using again?”

Elena’s temper snapped. “You have such
a hateful streak in you. Why?”

He gave her a slow, wicked smile. “Me,
not at all. I’m just looking out for my investment. Be assured –
that’s all Joshua Ravensong is to me. I have no other feelings
about him whatsoever.”

“
Oh yes, that’s obvious,”
Elena remarked, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Julian’s brows rose in surprise, but
he gave no other expression away. Taking her elbow, he steered her
into the room. “You’ll have to kiss ass in his place. I have some
investors who are interested in backing a European
tour.”

For the next few hours, Elena was
handed from one obligatory conversation to the next. The faces and
names blurred after awhile, there were so many of them. Finally she
slipped away, moving to the darker corners of the room where she
hoped Julian wouldn’t think to look for her.

Oddly enough, she found Elliot sitting
on a couch, nursing a beer. She hesitated a moment, not wanting to
face the situation, but he seemed so lonely sitting by himself that
she felt a stab of guilt.

Crossing to his side, she sank down on
the couch. He didn’t even acknowledge her presence, taking a sip of
his beer, then staring at it where it rested against his
knee.

“
I’m not real good company
right now,” he muttered.

Elena leaned back on the sofa and
stretched out her legs, sliding her shoes off her sore feet. “I’m
not really looking for company anyway.” She studied the people all
around, lost in their own worlds of conversation and booze,
blocking out the other conversations that went on around
them.

“
How’d you get away from
Julian?”

“
Just walked away,” she
said without looking at him.

Elliot took another sip. “You sure
jump when he commands. And you don’t even look sick about
it.”

Elena shifted on the couch and gave
him a severe look. “I’m not your enemy, Elliot, so don’t pick a
fight with me.”

“
I’m just saying that you
go to great lengths to smooth Julian’s way. I thought you had more
fight in you than that.”

“
Well, then I guess we’re
both disappointed in each other,” she said, turning
away.

Elliot was silent for a moment, then
he took another sip. “What the hell did that mean? What did I do to
disappoint you?”

She closed her eyes and sighed
wearily. “Nothing. I just thought you were a more loyal friend than
you are.”

“
That’s pretty low, lady. I
wasn’t the one that betrayed the friendship. Or isn’t Joshua held
to the same standard?” He gave a snort of bitter laughter. “Of
course not. Not the perfect Joshua Ravensong. After all, we’re all
here for him. He’s the true star and we’re all orbiting in his
gravity. Sorry, I forgot.”

She turned on the sofa and braced her
elbow on the back of it, resting her head against her hand. “Joshua
didn’t tell you because of me,” she said calmly. “I asked him to
keep it a secret because I was afraid I would lose my job if anyone
knew.” She rubbed at her temples, realizing a headache was
beginning. “If you want to blame someone, blame me. Joshua was only
trying to protect me.”

Elliot studied her in silence, then
drank from his beer. He snorted again. “Well, here’s what you don’t
get – he could have told me anything. I would never have let
anything slip, but he didn’t. He kept it to himself, so don’t
school me on loyalty when he never had an ounce of it
himself.”

“
Elliot, you just don’t
understand. Neither one of us knew what was happening and we were
both terrified… still are, truth be known. We aren’t any good at
relationships, neither one of us, and we aren’t even sure we can
make this work. And yet we couldn’t stop seeing each other. Your
feelings got hurt, but you and I were always friends, nothing more.
I didn’t make any promises to you or encourage you in any way. You
had no reason to believe there was anything more between us than
friendship. The first time I saw Joshua, I was smitten. I can’t
help that, anymore than I can help what happened. To give up your
friendship over something that would never have happened between
you and me is stupid, Elliot. Just plain stupid.” She took a breath
and rose to her feet. “But obviously that is something you’ll have
to make peace with on your own. Good night, El. I wish you an
unblemished rest tonight.”

With that she walked away without
waiting for a response.

CHAPTER 12

Elena slammed the paper down on the
table, turning to stare out of the window. She didn’t see anything
but the words super-imposed on the glass in front of
her.

Avalanche’s Troubled Lead
Singer in Trouble Again?

The pulse of angry blood in
her temples made her headache worse. Bloody hell, she knew who was
behind this latest attack, but was Julian spurring these rumors for
publicity or to hurt Joshua? Worse still was the quote from
the
unnamed
roadie. She knew exactly who that roadie was. There were
becoming too many snakes in the grass to keep track of, she
thought.

The handle turned on the bathroom
door. Elena grabbed the paper and folded it, hiding the article.
Joshua didn’t need anything else to worry him. With Elliot’s
continued distance and whatever else was bothering him, Elena was
concerned that he might worry himself into an illness before the
tour ended. He wasn’t eating much and his sleep was constantly
disturbed.

She wasn’t sleeping much better.
Whenever Joshua got up in the middle of the night, she was wide
awake beside him. He wouldn’t tell her what was bothering him, he
kept saying it was nothing, but she didn’t know how much more of
his secrecy she could take.

She didn’t think he was keeping
anything big from her, nothing as big as this slanderous article
suggested, but something was gnawing away at him and his lack of
foreclosure only fueled her own insecurity.

He halted and met her gaze, lowering
his towel. She realized she was staring at him. “Something wrong?”
he asked.

She forced a smile and shook her head.
Glancing at her watch, she rose to her feet. “I’d better get to the
morning meeting.”

He started drying his hair again.
“That’s something I don’t miss.” He moved to the table and reached
for the paper. “The review in here?”

She pulled it away as she moved toward
him. Kissing him, she shook her head. “No. I’ll just throw it in
the recycle bin on the way out.”

Joshua gave her an odd look. She knew
she was acting strangely, but she really didn’t want him to see the
article. “Okay,” he said. “I’m gonna head over to the stadium for
sound-check then.”

“
Meet you there,” she
replied with forced brightness, then hurried to the door and opened
it.

“
Elena?”

Glancing back over her shoulder, she
tightened her hand on the paper. “What?”

“
You okay?”

“
Of course,” she laughed.
“Just late. I don’t want to hear about it from Julian.”

He nodded, but she knew he wasn’t
convinced. He’d probably have Dominic bring him a paper the moment
she closed the door. Ah well, she’d tried to protect
him.

She rehearsed what she would say to
Julian during the elevator ride to the first floor. She wanted to
confront him in front of the rest of the band. She wanted them to
see what he was capable of doing, especially Elliot, but the moment
she entered the room, her plan faded into the
background.

Julian was handing out a multi-page
document. “This is the preliminary contract for a five country
tour. I’ve included dates and locations. Once I have a signed copy,
I’ll fax it to the office and have them find out what official
documents we need.”

Robert let the papers rifle through
his fingers. “This sounds like you’ve already booked
us?”

“
Like I said, this is the
preliminary contract, but the reps in Europe want to start
promoting the tour.” He glanced up at Elena and threw another copy
of the contract toward the end of the table. “You’re
late.”

Elena’s fingers tightened around the
newspaper as she moved toward the contract.

“
Joshua said he wasn’t
doing a European tour,” offered Ralph.

“
Right,” muttered Julian,
putting his glasses on and turning a page. “Obviously, your
signatures go on the final page, we’ll use my copy for that, and
I’ve had Risk Management review it in full. Everything’s in
order.”

“
Except the fact that
Joshua doesn’t want to do a tour,” Ralph persisted.