Reckless Fear (The Black Vipers #1) (11 page)

I could feel him on my heels as he followed me into the bedroom.

“Just do the right thing. Walk away from me while you still can!”

He grabbed at his hair, pacing back and forth like a caged animal. I backed up, leaning against the wall behind me. There was something in the way he moved…something so raw and sexy. He rolled his shoulders, the muscles in his arms straining against the frustration I was causing. He was ready to snap. His muscular legs stretched against the fabric of his jeans, promising untamed power.

I was losing control and he hadn't even touched me yet. There was so much emotion spilling around us it was palpable.

“You’re driving me wild,” he growled. “Your refusal to see how much I need you, makes me feel claustrophobic.”

His cheeks were flushed, fists flexed at his side.

“Tight, we can’t.”

“These walls feel like they’re closing in. I want to bust my way of this damn place and just fucking run. Run from all the pain I’ve cause you, from the hurt on your face every time you look at me.  I failed you so miserably. I’m a horrible person who’s done terrible things. But all I want is exactly what I don’t deserve-you.”

He closed the distance between us with two dominating steps, stopping just inches from me. The heat from his body mixed with mine, giving fuel to the flames that were already threatening to burn down every wall I’d built. I gasped as his lust-filled eyes bore into mine, communicating all of his sinful thoughts.

“I’m a fucking selfish bastard.” Pausing for only a few heartbeats, he grabbed my hips, grinding his hard arousal against my already throbbing core. I dug my fingers into his lower back, pulling him against me.

My eyelids fluttered from the rush of pure need that coursed through me and he growled his approval at my body’s reaction to him.

His breath quickened as he encased me with his presence, weakening my knees and stealing my breath.

He moved against me once more, his fingers pushing down my leggings just enough to expose my bare hip bones. He circled his calloused thumbs over the sensitive skin.

“God, I want this, all of it,” he whispered. “But if me leaving is really the only way you will be safe, then that’s what I’ll do. I will leave right now and never try to find you again.”

A painful look crossed his face, obviously fighting inner demons. He stilled his eyes flashing the pain my absence would cause him.

“If I can’t have you then my only hope is to wipe you completely from my memory. To run and fight and kill until I can’t remember why I have this emptiness.”

My chest burned, tears threatening as I pictured him trying to forget me. Possessiveness poured into me and suddenly all I wanted in the world was to be everything he needed me to be.

He leaned into me and I shamelessly rubbed my breasts against him, my body screaming for some sort of release. Leaning over, he pressed his nose against the soft skin behind my ear. “I don’t know what to do.”

He rubbed his stubble along my jaw line, stopping his lips just inches from mine. Our warm breaths mixed together as he touched his forehead to mine.

He was right, it was too much.

Too Intense.

But I couldn't stop, there was nothing I could do to control this anymore. I’d been his from the second I’d stepped into his hospital room…and for all the years before that if I was honest.

Gently he took each of my wrists in his hands and pulled them above my head. Using one hand, he held them in place. His free hand slid slowly down my cheek, stopping to rub his thumb over my bottom lip…making me shiver. He made his was down the side of my neck, sending shockwaves of pleasure through my whole body. He stopped with his hand over my heart, pressing the palm down gently.

My resistance began to give way as I melted toward him. He whispered, “I want this.”

I closed my eyes, knowing he could feel the pounding of my heart. I leaned my head back. I wanted to give in, wanted to feel every part of him.

“Sasha, please. I can’t wait anymore. There are so many things I need to do to this body, but I won’t until I have your heart too.”

He used his soft, delicious lips to kiss a trail down my neck, I leaned my head to the side, allowing him access and he growled his understanding.

His hand continued exploring as it moved down my body. He squeezed my breast, making me whimper with pleasure.

“You see Sasha,” he whispered into my ear. “I know who I am and the effect I have on you. I know I can have this.”

He pushed his hand into my pants, grabbing between my legs and pressing, the pressure making me crazy with lust. I gasped, rubbing myself against him. He smiled against my ear, pulling in a sharp breath as he circled his hand.

“That’s right, baby.  This body, it calls to me. It needs me. It knows all the ways I could fuck you…Fill you like no one else can.”

He pushed a finger inside of me, hissing and biting his bottom lip. “You’re so ready for me, baby.”

My head fell back against the wall and I moaned. He added a second finger, stretching me and curling his fingers perfectly. My body tensed as every thrust of his finger brought me closer and closer to the edge. He pulled his fingers out, using the wetness to circle my sensitive core. Waves of pleasure pulsed out into my body making me lightheaded.

“Tight,” I begged, my voice strained.

In one quick motion he dropped my arms and picked me up. I wrapped my legs around him, grinding against his swollen cock as he pressed me against the wall.

“Fuck, Sash.” He rocked against me again, making me bite my lower lip. “Say the words, say you’ll be mine. I don’t think I can stop this time.”

He growled as his lips crashed against mine. We each fought for control as our lips proved over and over that our hunger for each other would never be satisfied. I open for him and his tongue possessively took control of my mouth.

Swallowing my moans as he stole every doubt from my heart.  I pushed my hands against his chest, needing more from him.

“Yes. Fuck yes, I want this,” I said.

There was no pause, no rethinking.

He turned with me still wrapped around him. Desperation crossed his face as we got to the side of the bed, his lips crashing onto mine roughly. He was marking what he now hoped was his, and I was.

He lowered me to my feet, moving his hands to the side of my face.

He released me only long enough to rip the shirt from his body. I took no time running my hands all over his bare skin. I wanted to own every part of it.

Lifting my shirt just enough, he opened the front clasp of my bra. He squeezed one breast while sucking the other nipple into his mouth. His expert tongue circled and teased, sending shockwaves straight through me. I wrapped my fingers around the back of his head, pulling him closer. He released my breasts, moving kisses down my stomach, his hands pushing down my leggings and panties at the same time.

I stilled for a second, realizing how exposed I was. Fear surged. This wasn’t safe.

He would know who I was soon enough, I just couldn't tell him now. Not this way. I tentatively removed my shirt and bra, making sure to keep my back away from him.

He stood, his hooded eyes trailing up and down my body as he nodding his approval.

I dropped my eyes to the floor, “Please remember about my scars,” I whispered, afraid he would protest and demand to see them.

He hooked a finger under my chin, lifting my eyes to his.

“You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Lay down, Sasha.” I did as I was told, careful to keep my scars hidden.

He locked his eyes onto mine, slowly unbuttoning his pants and stepping out of them while palming his already hard erection.

I gasped, rubbing my thighs together with need. The thrill of seeing him naked and wanting me was more than I could stand.

He crawled up my body, his intense eyes never leaving mine. I opened my legs for him, allowing him to settle in between. I wrapped my legs around him, adjusting myself against him.

He held himself over me with one hand while continuing to slowly work himself with the other.

“You need this, baby?” his lips parting as his breaths quickened.

I wanted to explode from the mix of pain and pleasure caused by watching him touch himself. My body was a lightning storm of raw lust and there was nothing that could stop this.

Not my fears, not my doubts, not even the secrets I’d pushed to the back corners of my mind.

I shamelessly rubbed myself against him again, grabbing him around the neck and pulling him to my mouth.  Sucking in his bottom lip and biting at him, I begged, “Please, Tight.”

A smirk lifted his swollen, red lips. “Do you need something?”

I moaned, nodding and rubbing my wetness against his straining cock.

“I can help you with that,” he said as he lined himself up against my opening.

He stilled, locking eyes with me. My breath caught as his eyes told me everything this moment meant.

He pushed into me slowly, every inch of him causing me a delicious mix of slow burning passion and exploding lust. I arched up to meet him, needing all of him.

He lifted one of my legs and I moaned as he slipped even deeper inside of me.

“Fucking perfect,” he whispered as he began his steady rhythm. Slowly at first, making me absolutely crazy the way he worked himself in and out of me, pulling back and pausing until the very last second when I thought I would lose my mind, then thrusting back in.

“Tight, It feels so…”

“I know, baby. Damn.” With a groan, he quickened his strokes, demanding more from me and taking what was his.

I dug my fingernails into his back. “More, I want all of you.”

He obeyed, pounding into me with pure obsession.

“You own all of me, already.”

His words pushed me over the edge and I tightened around him, heightening both our pleasure. He moaned in my ear, pounding into me as my back arched off the bed. My body shattered under him, the waves of orgasm pulsating over and over as I screamed his name. Holding me tightly, he thrust deep once more, finding his release as he let out a deep moan, followed by my name as a whisper on his lips.

He stayed inside of me as we tried to slow our breathing.

“That was fucking incredible,” he whispered. Pulling out, he fell next to me, laying his head onto my chest and pulling me as close to him as he could get me. I brought my hands up to his hair, running my fingers through the soft strands.

A tear spilled over onto my cheek as he sighed contently. Once again we lay in the dark, our hot bodies pressed together. Promises fresh on our tongues and hearts.

Only this time, I knew he meant it. He would never let me go. He’d finally found me and this his way of claiming what he thought was already his.

But just like the first time, one of us had lied. One of us knew this wasn't forever. He would be disgusted when he found out, but I was going to keep taking this for as long as I could, because my heart had never wanted anything more.

I woke up genuinely happy. Not just the freshly fucked happiness I get when I’ve spent the night screwing all my anger away. This was true fulfillment. The kind that takes your heart and squeezes it until you lose your breath, but in a good way.

When I opened my eyes, she was in my arms. She had given herself to me last night. That was all I cared about.

Maverick, The Dark Riders…even my club were all secondary to her now. She was center stage and everyone else would have to wait in line.

I ran my fingers over the t-shirt she’d slipped back on right after we made love.

Her scars made her feel like a failure. But it wasn’t her who had failed, it was me. I would spend the rest of my life making it up to her, no matter the cost.

I made my way to the kitchen. I wasn’t one hundred percent sure what I was doing, I wasn’t even fifty percent, but willing to make an ass of myself by trying.

I grabbed a big bowl and plugged in the griddle. Pancakes were easy enough, and would have to do.

I went to work reading instructions, stirring shit and trying to figure out how to get it onto the griddle. I was elbow deep in pancake batter when the screen on my phone lit up with Justin’s number.

My stomach sank.

As curious as I’d been to find out about Sasha’s background, it didn’t matter anymore. There was nothing in her past that could make me cut her from my life.

She was on the run from an asshole of a father and had people helping her. Connected people. People with money. That could be dangerous for me and the club. But none of that mattered now because I would be the one to keep her safe from now on.

Running wasn’t an option anymore. Whatever debt she owed, whatever darkness she’d lived in to get her here, I could give a shit less. We would face each of her demons together and I would kill them all with a smile on my face.

I reached over and declined Justin’s call. I knew I’d get my ass kicked for it, but right now, I just wanted peace.

I wanted to eat pancakes in bed with the woman who was the closest thing to home I would ever have. Today would be about us celebrating finding our way back to each other.

A phone buzzed in the bedroom. I knew she had destroyed one when we first got here. I also knew she had others in her bag that were untraceable along with guns, ammo and several Id’s. She was fully prepared to disappear in a seconds notice. I felt a twinge of anxiety realizing she’d left our bed last night to get a phone. Who would be so important she needed to stay in constant contact with them?

I watched her from my spot in the kitchen, the open living space giving me a clear view of her through the bedroom door.

The phone buzzed again and it startled her. She sat straight up in bed and reached for the phone.

I watched as she placed her feet on the floor, running a hand over her eyes. She gazed around the room before glancing over her shoulder at me. Relief crossed across her face.

Her eyes dropped for second before flashing me a small, tired smile. She stood, walking to part of the bedroom I couldn't see.

Call it instinct, jealousy or maybe self-preservation but I suddenly needed to know who was on the other line.

I moved to the doorway, pushing the door slightly open so I could hear the conversation.

She stood with her back to me in front of one of the floor-to-ceiling windows. Her head hung low as she whispered into the phone.

“Hello?” she answered.

Her body stiffened as she listened to the person on the other end.

Pinching the bridge of her nose, she released a shaky breath. “What do I need to do?”

She began a short pace, back and forth, while she raked her fingers through her hair.

“I can’t do it. I can’t leave him like that.”

I put my hand to the door, prepared to push it open and take her in my arms until my phone rang behind me. She turned, our eyes met and she knew I’d heard.

Tears streamed down her face. She was leaving. She had said she couldn't leave me but it wasn't a statement of fact, it was a statement of regret.

She would leave me, even if it was painful…even if it would kill both of us. She would do it for whoever was on the other end of that damn phone.

I stomped toward her, pulling the phone from her hand and yelling into it.

“She’s not fucking going anywhere! She’s with me now and I won’t let her leave!” I threw the phone to the floor and the screen shattered. She stood sobbing and I grabbed her shoulders, making her look at me.

“Who was on the fucking phone, Sasha? Tell me.”

My phone sounded off again in the other room. With shaky hands, she wiped the tears from her cheeks.

“You should get that.”

“I don't give a shit what the hell Justin has to say about your past. It doesn't matter to me.”

“It will. Go get the phone.”

I released her, nearly ripping the door from the hinges when I passed through.

“What the fuck do you want?”

“Calm down and listen to me,” Justin said.

“Just fucking tell me what you know.”

Justin’s voice was steady. “You are not safe with this girl.”

I growled into the phone, pacing and grabbing at my hair. “I haven't been safe a mother-fucking second of my life. Tell me what you know.”

I walked back into the room. Her shoulders slumped forward as her body shook with sobs. I wanted to go to her, throw this damn phone to the ground and take her into my arms…until I saw the gun in her hand.

“You need to get out of there, Tight. I’m not sure how much time you have before The Dark Riders show up.”

“Okay.” I lowered my voice a bit, holding up one hand in the air between us. “Baby, just put the gun down. You’re safe, just get your stuff. We have to go.”

She started shaking her head wildly. “I told you to let me go. Now look where we are. No. No, I can’t go with you.”

“You can’t bring her here,” Justin said.  “If she comes here, she will die.”

“What the Hell? Then I’m staying with her.”

“If you do that,
you
will die.”

I looked up and locked eyes with Sasha. Her eyes pleaded with me as she whispered the same thing over and over.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Somewhere in the back of my mind, the next words Justin spoke registered. I ignored the warnings he spit out trying to convince me to leave Sasha behind.

I knew what he was saying. I understood the words…but somehow my heart refused to believe the meaning. It twisted painfully inside of me, stealing every sensible thought my mind tried to convey. My reality was fading around the edges. Sounds were nothing but blurred noises filtering in and out between her cries and my denial.

All I could do was watch her as she lifted her t-shirt over her head and threw it to the floor.

“No. Put that damn shirt back on. I don’t want to see what you’ve been hiding. I don’t want to see your scars.”

“Look at me, damn it! Look at me. All I am is scars. Scars from you, scars from him…scars from the things I’ve done to save myself.”

Justin’s next words snapped my life in two. On one side-my club, my life, everything that had saved me. On the other side-my love, my salvation, and the one I was made to save.

The entire world started to spin and tilt, throwing me around like a child.

“No, it’s not fucking true. Tell me it isn’t true.”

She slowly lifted her gun, setting the sites between my eyes. A sudden yet eerie calmness coming over her.

I dropped the phone as I lifted my hands up in front of me.

“Sasha. Baby, tell me it’s not fucking true.”

Taking her silence for confirmation, I dropped to my knees, smashing my fists against the floor.

“Why do you have that gun? Are you going to kill me Sasha? Were you going to fuck me and then shoot me in my sleep?”

I rose up on my knees, stretching my hands out to the sides, “Just fucking do it then. Do it!”

“I’m not going to kill you,” she muttered, her voice absent of emotion.

“You might as well. Fuck it, Sasha!” I slapped the sides of my head, trying to rid all the noise and confusion.

“I love you. I’ve always loved you,” she whispered.

I stood, pointing in her direction. My voice shook with disbelief.

“Don’t you say those words to me. This has all been a lie, a fucking game to you.”

“No.”

“Then tell me, tell me what the fuck is going on, because from where I’m standing it sure looks like you’ve played a perfect hand of revenge. Tell me who you are. What is your real name?”

She dropped the gun to her side and locked her eyes with mine. Her breaths quickened and her nostrils flared.

“My name is Sasha Campbell. I am the daughter of Big Frank Campbell, former President of The Dark Riders and the one responsible for your beloved Gen's death. I am Dark Rider by blood, the same blood you’ve vowed to spill until you’ve killed us all.”

Bile rose in my throat and I tried to control my rage. “No.”

“Yes. He is also the one who murdered our child and sold me.”

“Why did he do that to you? Why did he kill Gen?”

“Retaliation.” Her face drained of all color and her eyes clouded over. “Maverick’s father had very powerful friends.”

“Holy shit. What the fuck are you talking about?”

She lifted her arms to the side, speaking as she turned slowly.

“Not your club…you. Once he figured out who you were, it all clicked into place.”

I froze as her full back came into view.

“You killed Maverick’s father and took my virginity. My father had to deliver payment one way or another.”

Stunned from the sight before me, I stumbled to the side, catching myself against the bed.

Tattooed from shoulder blade to shoulder blade was the image of a sheeted ghost riding a black horse. The ghost held a staff that dripped the blood of their enemies in one hand, a skull in the other. She had been branded with their patch.

“So for payment, my father tortured and murdered the only person in the world that meant something to you, your beloved Gen.”

I pushed the palms of my hands into my eyes but the image would forever be burned into my soul. I screamed in rage and she spoke through her sobs.

“From the day I met you until the second I escaped his clutches, I paid the price for your sins.”

My gut twisted as I opened my eyes again to read the words that seared my darkened heart and would throw me into the pits of Hell I deserved with no hope of returning. In place of the rockers that should have been tattooed on and read Property of The Dark Riders, was a crudely written message. One that had been carved into her skin with a knife. The bumpy and marred skin would forever hold proof of his anger and malice.

Property of Maverick.

Slowly turning back toward me and dropping her hands, she tilted her head to one side. Studying me as a small smirk lifted one side of her mouth, her eyes clouded with concern.

“It’s okay. Now you understand, don’t you? Why we can’t ever be together? Why I’m dangerous? He will never stop looking for me.”

I stood in shock, watching as something inside of her snapped. Her grip on reality quickly slipping from her reach.

“As long as he has me, he can hurt you. He didn’t find you, he wasn't looking for you. He found
me
.”

In one quick motion, she lifted the gun to her head. “It’s the only way to save both of us.”

I dove for her as the alarms from the elevator sounded in the background.

We hit the ground hard and pain exploded in my side. The aftermath of the gun shot rang in my head making everything blur into unnatural shapes.

I blinked slowly, my eyelids heavy. People flooded into the room, pointing guns and screaming at me.

I lay on the floor, Sasha wrapped tightly in my arms. Pulling her even closer, I pressed my lips against her neck. The darkness began to take over and I prayed, wherever she was, she would be able to hear me as I whispered, “Sin is never free. I’m sorry you had to pay for mine.”

THE END