Right Girl (4 page)

“Of
course.”

“Because
I also want you to give me
this
someday… if I own every part of you then
it shouldn’t be a problem.”

His
hand moves down my body, reaching underneath so he can squeeze me. I know
exactly what he’s referring to and I gasp with astonishment as well as arousal
which shocks me greatly.

“You
mean…?”

I
can hardly say it out loud and don’t think I want to. It’s such a taboo subject
for me… something I’ve never even thought about let alone contemplated doing.

“That’s
exactly what I mean.” He assures me, gazing into my eyes intently. “I want to
own every single part of you and need to make you mine,
completely
mine.
Is that so terrible?”

“H-have
you done it before?”

The
idea of Zack doing something like this with someone else is unthinkable. The
thought of it consumes me with jealousy and I can only hope his answer will be
what I want to hear. I don’t think I could bring myself to experiment with anal
sex if I know the man I love has experienced it with somebody else first.

“I
don’t want to lie to you.” He says, moistening his lips in trepidation. “I have.”

“With
who?” I demand, somewhat harshly.

“Sam…”
He groans, unable to complete his sentence.

He’s
choosing to remain silent, making me realise that he’s referring to my sister
and I cover my face with my hands. I don’t want to look at him and want to
erase the image I now have of the two of them in my head.

I
ignore him when he tries to pull my hands away. He attempts coaxing me into
submission but I remain strong and stubbornly defiant.

“Leave
me alone.”

“Sweetheart,
please… I’m so sorry.”

“There’s
nothing to be sorry for.” I snap bitterly. “I can’t be angry with you for
something you did in your past.”

“You
can
be angry. You can be whatever the hell you want to be.”

“Just
kiss me.” I murmur, keeping my eyes closed as I remove my hands. “Prove how
much you love me.”

“You’re
mine forever.” He growls, lowering his lips towards mine, stealing my breath
away with a single kiss. His tongue invades my mouth, demanding an entrance as
he plunges himself deep inside of me. “Only you. Always you. You’re mine
forever.”

His
release comes quickly and I long to seal my entire body to his. I wrap my legs
around his waist and my arms around his neck but it’s not enough. The
connection between us is slipping away and there’s nothing I can do about it.

I
yearn for the man who saved me to rescue me from this. I want him to protect me
and promise me that everything will be alright. I yearn for the emptiness
inside of me to disappear as well as the pain which accompanies my heartache.

The
warmth of Zack consumes me, fulfilling me beyond anything I could describe or
explain. We stay like that, locked together as he collapses on top of me. Running
my fingers through his hair, I can’t help but ask myself if things will ever be
the same again…

Chapter Five

“Are
you going to tell me what happened?” I ask Zack the following morning.

We
woke up about an hour ago and neither one of us has spoken about last night. I
fire my question at him as soon as he exits the bathroom and I can tell I’ve
caught him by surprise.

“Do
you really want to talk about this right now?”

“Yes.”
I insist, refusing to tear my eyes away from him.

He
hesitates for a moment, throwing his damp towel on the bed after his shower.
He’s shirtless but must have put his jeans on before he came into the bedroom.
I try and keep my focus, wondering how on earth I can be distracted like this.

“Well
I saw her.” He informs me, awaiting my reaction. “I saw Rachel.”

“So
you spoke to her?”

“We
talked for a couple of hours.” He explains, reaching for one of his shirts.
“She’s staying at your mum’s house with the baby.”

“Did…
did you see her?” I enquire, referring to my sister’s baby.

“Rachel
allowed me to look in on her but she was asleep so I didn’t get to hold her or
anything. I saw her for five minutes.”

I’m
amazed she let him see her at all and try to extinguish the flames of envy
which are ignited inside of me.

“Did
my mum say anything to you?” I demand, trying to steer the subject away from my
sister.

“I
told Rachel I wouldn’t speak to her unless we were alone. I didn’t want your
mum interfering and trying to cause even more trouble.”

It’s
not a secret that Zack despises my mother. He hates her for her treatment of me
as well as refusing to believe me when I told her about the abuse I experienced
as a child. She chose to side with the man she loved instead of her daughter
and I guess Rachel has now followed in her footsteps.

“Zack,
what about… what about Harry?” I whisper, struggling to say his name out loud.

“He
wasn’t there. He’s spent his last day in the UK and that’s why they were out
shopping together when you saw them. He’ll be back in Spain by now.”

“Thank
God.” I say, exhaling slowly.

It
feels as though a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I can
breathe easy. The thought of him being close by was unsettling and I now hope I
can relax if I know he’s gone.

“Samantha,
he’s still a free man. So what if he’s gone abroad again? He’s not in jail and
he’s still free to harm my daughter.”

He
glowers at me in anger, failing to understand how frightened I was when I knew
my uncle was close by.

“Rachel
would never let him her, Zack. She’ll protect her.”

“Like
your mum protected you?” He retorts sharply, narrowing his eyes at me in
annoyance.

“Please
don’t compare my mum to Rachel. What my mum did to me was evil.”

“Come
here.” He instructs me, sighing deeply.

I
remain seated on the bed, defying him and his request.

“Why?”
I challenge him, folding my arms across my chest.

“Please
just come here.” He begs me. “
Now
.”

I
wait a few moments before I get up and go to him. I stand right in front of him
and tremble, incapable of hiding my true feelings.

“I’m
sorry.” He apologises sincerely, stroking his fingers through my hair. “I
shouldn’t have said any of those things. Do you forgive me?”

His
lips graze my own and I take a step back, desperate to put some distance
between us. I know I won’t be able to function or even pay attention if we
remain in close proximity like this and need to stay focused.

“Just
tell me what happened.” I persist, breaking away from him so he’s forced to
continue.

Zack
leans back against the wall behind him, locking those smouldering brown eyes of
his upon my own.

“I
told her I want a DNA test, just to make sure she’s really mine. She wasn’t too
happy about that but agreed to it in the end. If the results come back and
prove I’m the father then I told her I want to play a part in my daughter’s
life.”

“And
where does that leave us?” I ask him, horrified by the idea that I might have
to share him.

“Exactly
as we are.” He assures me, sounding confident. “We carry on as normal and won’t
let this change us whatsoever.”

“How
on earth do you expect us to do that? We’re not invincible, Zack.”

“Yes
we are and I’ll prove that to you.” He says, taking one step forward so he can
wrap his arms around my waist.

“But
how?”

“By
putting
you
first. I want this to work out for us both, Sam.”

“How
do you mean?”

“I
want you to help me. I want you to help me raise Amber.”

I
gasp when I realise he’s being serious. He actually thinks this could work and
has faith in the idea that the three of us can be parents.

“Rachel
would never allow it. She won’t want me involved in her baby’s life.” I argue,
absolutely certain about that.

“But
what do
you
want?” He asks, studying my face closely.

“Zack,
I have to be completely honest with you… I don’t want that either.”

He
nods his head slowly, placing a soft kiss in the centre of my forehead.

“I
see.”

“Being
part of her life would just be a constant reminder for me. I can’t watch you be
a father to someone else’s child.”

“Then
let me give you your own. You know how much I want a baby with you.”

“I’m
so sorry.” I cry, removing his hands from my waist. “I just can’t do it.”

“Samantha,
I’m begging you… don’t do this to me.”

He
follows me across the room, taking hold of my wrist so he can turn me around to
face him.

“I
won’t make you choose.” I blurt out. “I promise you I won’t.”

“What
are you saying?”

“Zack,
I think I should just go.” I whisper, tearing myself away from his grasp.

I
try to leave but he won’t let me, blocking the doorway by placing himself in
front of it.

“Where
the hell do you think you’re going? Did I say you could leave?” He growls,
closing in on me with a predatory gleam in his eyes.

“You
can’t tell me what to do, Zack.”

“Can’t
I?” He challenges me harshly. “I think I just did.”

The
sound of my phone interrupts us and I use it as an excuse to distract myself
for a moment, reaching for it inside my bag.

“It’s
no one important.” I inform him, deleting the message straight away.

“Who
was it?” He commands, striding across the room towards me.

“It’s
nothing.” I lie, raking my fingers through my hair.

He
grabs my phone from my hands, trying to read my message. He starts scrolling
through my phone, ignoring my protests when I demand he give it back to me.

“Why
the fuck did my brother call you last night?” He yells, forcing me back when I
try reaching for it again.

“He
just wanted to wish me a happy birthday.” I answer him truthfully.

“Don’t
lie to me. He’s the one who just texted you right now, isn’t he? Why the hell
did you delete it and why is he contacting you in the first place?!”

“Look,
he
did
call me last night but it was innocent. How can you not trust
me?”

The
fact that Zack thinks I’m hiding something is so painful, it breaks my heart.
After everything we’ve been through together, how can he doubt me?

“Because
you’re hiding something from me! You just deleted his text right in front of
me!”

“Ok,
I shouldn’t have done that but I didn’t want you to suspect me of anything.
Aaron just wants to be my friend and he was there for me last night when you
went to see Rachel.”

“So
you’ve been confiding in my brother behind my back?” He snaps, narrowing his
eyes at me incredulously.

“He
knows about what happened because I had to tell him. He wondered where you were
when he found out I was alone last night.” I tell him, running out of reasons
when it comes to explaining myself.

“I
don’t believe this.” He groans, throwing my phone against the wall.

It
shatters into pieces, resembling the way my heart feels right now.

“Zack,
calm down. We have more important things to work through right now.”

I
drop to my knees, scrambling to put the broken pieces of my phone back
together.

“Samantha,
tell me the truth… is something going on between the two of you?”

I
gaze up at him with teary eyes, tears which are threatening to spill over any
second.

“How
can you ask me that?” I murmur, fighting for breath as I begin to cry. “You
really think I’d cheat on you?”

“He’s
always had a thing for you and you know it.” Zack reminds me, pacing back and
forth in fury.

“Of
course he hasn’t!” I sob, pulling myself up onto my feet. “He tried flirting
with me when we first met but that was nearly a year ago. He didn’t know you
had feelings for me back then and he hasn’t tried anything like that since.”

I
know exactly what Zack is referring to and can’t believe he’s actually using it
as a reason to doubt me. Zack’s younger brother was quite flirtatious with me
when we first met but that was long ago. He knows I’m madly in love with Zack
and would never come between that or even try to.

Aaron
and I
did
hang out on one occasion when Zack had to go to lunch with his
parents and Rachel. They were still engaged at the time and he was forced to keep
up with the pretence. I’d bumped into Aaron on my way home and we ended up
spending the afternoon together, laughing and talking. He surprised me when it
came to how open-minded he was and easy to talk to. Our friendship has always been
completely platonic and I resent the fact that Zack thinks otherwise.

“I
can’t lose you. I
won’t
lose you.” He states, coming to a standstill
right in front of me.

“You
will if you keep acting like this.” I warn him, allowing Zack to pull me close.

He
cradles me in his arms, protecting me from the world and everything which might
try and come between us.

 I
don’t know how long our safe haven is going to last. The barrier between us and
those which threaten us is so think, it’s only a matter of time before they
break through our shield.

It’s
just a matter of when.