Road to Absolution (8 page)

Carter dropped
his head to my shoulder with a sigh.

“Carter,
Maverick is only a few feet away. I want to try and at least
pretend
I’m
not a total whore.”

His eyes met
mine and he scowled. “You ever say anything like that again, Cassidy Dennis,
you and I are gonna have a problem.”

“Well, it’s
true.”

“It’s not
fuckin’ true,” he snapped. “Even if you fucked me in your kitchen right now,
you’d still not be a whore. We love each other, we’ve known each other for over
eighteen years, and we’ve been best friends for most of that time. I think
we’ve waited for an appropriate amount of time, don’t you?”

I shivered. “I’d
kind of like the kitchen option at some point.”

He groaned. “You
seriously sayin’ shit like that while tellin’ me I gotta wait?”

“Sorry,” I
grumbled. “You’re right.”

“We can wait,
baby, but I’m not leavin’.”

“What do we tell
Mav?”

“We tell him I’m
home from the Air Force now, I’ve served my time and I’m gonna be a permanent
feature in your lives. You’ve already established me in your home with all the
photos.”

I bit my lip.
“That’s actually really good.”

“I know it’s
good. Shit, Cass, give me some credit.”

“No.” I giggled.
“You already have the upper hand.”

“Good to know.”
Carter grinned. “You gonna confess now?”

“Confess?” I
asked. “Oh, that.”

“Yes, that.”

“Um…well, I have
your cologne.”

“Come again?”

I felt the heat
crawl up my neck. “I was having a particularly bad day a few years ago, so I
bought your cologne… it doesn’t
quite
smell like you, but I have that
old Harley T-shirt of yours, so every now and then I spray it and sleep with
it.” I covered my face with my hands. “Ohmigod, I can’t believe I’m telling you
this.”

“You spray my
shirt?”

I nodded, my
hands still over my face.

He tugged my
hands down and stroked my cheek. “I love you.”

“You don’t think
I’m weird?”

“No,” he said,
but his head bobbed up and down.

“Dork.”

He laughed. “You
are
weird, but not because of that.”

“Well, that’s a
relief,” I droned, sarcastically.

“I wondered
where that damn shirt went.”

I giggled. “I
kind of stole it.”

“I’m pickin’ up
on that.” He cocked his head. “When?”

“The day before
I left for Paris. I took it with me.”

“You did?”

I nodded. “I’m
sorry, Carter. I wish… I wish…”

“Huh-uh. Not
going there, baby.”

“Okay.” I
swallowed.

He smiled. “Go
to bed, Cassidy. I’ll sleep out here.”

“I’ll get you a
blanket and pillow.”

Carter kissed me
again and then slid off me. “Thanks.”

I rose to my
feet and grabbed the bedding from the hall closet, forcing myself not to let
down my guard. I wanted nothing more than to spend the night with Carter, but
we needed to ease Maverick into things and I was grateful Carter understood
that.

When I walked
back into the living room, Carter had removed his boots and vest, and set his
wallet and keys on the coffee table. I saw the old Ford key chain, now worn a
little, but still as I remembered. “Do you still have the truck?”

“Yeah,” he said.
“You’re surprised?”

I shrugged. “A
little, I guess.”

“We restored it
together, Cass. Won’t ever let it go.”

I felt my stomach
flip and I smiled. “Did you ever fix the door lock?”

He chuckled.
“Yeah. I’ll take you and Maverick out tomorrow.”

Handing him the
pillow and blanket, I nodded. My emotions were all over the map, but I was too
tired to analyze and figure them out. Carter dropped the bedding onto the sofa
and reached out to pull me close. “Hey.”

I blinked up at
him.

“There is no
pressure, yeah? We’ve done the hard part.”

“I wish I
believed you.”

“What don’t you
believe?”

“That this is
the hard part. We have so much baggage and I’m afraid it’ll weigh us down
moving forward.”

“We have a
couple of carry-ons, Cassidy.” He stroked my pulse, his eyes boring into me. “I
know there have been a few shitty circumstances that have kept us apart, but
deep down, we’re the same people, right?”

“I hope so.”

“I’m here. I’m
not going anywhere. We’re gonna figure this out together and it’s gonna be
better than we ever expected.”

I dropped my
head to his chest. “You’re still the eternal optimist I see.”

“And you’re
still a worrywart.”

“Promise me
we’re going to be okay.”

He lifted my
chin and nodded. “I’ll make sure it is. Trust me, yeah?”

“I’ll try.”

Carter chuckled.
“There’s my girl.”

“Okay, I’m
leaving you now or it will never happen.”

“You get lonely,
wake me.”

“No.”

“No?”

I bit my lip.
“I’m used to being lonely, Carter. But if I wake you and take you to bed, I
will never let you out of it, and I need to make sure we do this right.”

“Okay, baby.” He
leaned down and kissed me. “Love you.”

“Love you too.”

I headed off to
bed, leaving my door open, which I rarely did. I liked knowing Carter was close
and I don’t remember ever sleeping so soundly.

T
HE SOUND OF rain pounding on my window,
along with the unending laughter of my child, woke me with a start. I threw the
covers off my body and sat up, my heart racing until I remembered that Carter
was here.

I took a few
seconds to listen through the closed door, wondering when that had happened. I
could only assume Carter had closed it so I could sleep. I climbed out of bed
and sneaked down the hall to the bathroom where I brushed my teeth and hair
before following the sound of voices.

Arriving at the
kitchen, I laid my hand over my chest, the scene so unbelievably adorable, it
was almost as cute as a kitten hugging a puppy. Maverick was standing on a
chair at the counter, whisking batter in a bowl while Carter stood at the
stove, cracking eggs over a pan.

“Mom,” Maverick
exclaimed. “I’m helping Carter with breakfast.”

“I see that,
baby.” I closed the distance between us and he lifted his head for a kiss. I
hoped he always wanted to kiss me in the morning. “You’re doing such a good
job.”

“Hey, what about
me?” Carter challenged.

“What about
you?” I said.

He tugged me to
him and covered my mouth with his. I mumbled against his lips in an effort to
break our connection, but he slid his hand to the back of my head to hold me to
him.

“Good morning,”
he whispered once he released me.

I narrowed my
eyes at him and his response was a smug grin, so I wagged my finger and shook
my head. “Behave.”

“So if you kiss
Mommy, does that mean I can still kiss Katie?” Maverick asked.

“Busted,” I
mouthed.

Carter flipped
the eggs and then faced Maverick. “Here’s the deal, buddy. Mommy and me are
gonna get married, so it’s a little different.”

“You’re gonna
get married?” he asked.

“Carter,” I
warned.

“Yeah, buddy, we
are.”

“Mav, will you
please go to your room for a minute?” I said. “
Uncle
Carter and I need a
second.”

“Okay, Mama,” he
said, and jumped off the chair. He left the bowl on the counter and headed to
his room.

“Are you kidding
me with this?” I snapped.

“What?” Carter
slid the eggs from the pan onto a plate.

He’d made
himself comfortable in my kitchen and he looked good there. Damn it!

“You didn’t
think this might be something we’d discuss
first
and then decide how to
tell Maverick
together
?” I crossed my arms. “You had no right to
blindside me like that.”

Carter flipped
off the burner and leaned against the counter, thus beginning the first of many
epic stare-off battles. His slow, sexy smile ultimately solidified my loss. Unable
to continue to look at him in all his glory, so I picked up the bowl Maverick
had left and began to whisk the hell out the pancake batter.

“Babe.”

Whisk, whisk.

“Cassidy.”

“What?” I swiped
the whisk around the side of the bowl and then began to beat it again, but
found them gently removed from my hands and set next to the stove.

“The batter’s
done.”

“Okay.” I
stepped to the sink and washed my hands.

“Cass, you need
to look at me, baby.”

I grabbed a
towel and faced him, glancing up at him as I dried my hands.

“I’m sorry,” he
said. “You’re right. We should have talked about it.”

“Thank you.”

“How would you
like to proceed?”

“I think we
should just move past it,” I said.

Carter frowned.
“We’re not movin’ past it, baby, so let’s figure out what we want to say to
Mav.”

I set the towel
on the counter. “Excuse me?”

Carter lit the
stove again and started the pancakes. “I say we head down to the courthouse
next week and take care of the legalities, I can have Mack draw up adoption
paperwork, then we can talk to our families and go from there.”

“I’m sorry, can
you back up a little?” I requested.

“How far?”

“Carter Michael
Quinn, you do not get to talk over me on this! I have not agreed to anything,
especially considering the fact you haven’t actually asked me anything…” I let
out a frustrated squeak. “Stop looking at me like that!”

“Like what,
baby?”

Carter had
always had this annoying tactic of barreling over me with his dominant
personality and he’d usually get his way, but I was older and wiser now and
wasn’t going to let him do it to me again. “Get out.”

He chuckled and
flipped a pancake.

“I mean it,
Carter, get out of my house.”

“And why would
you want me to do that?” he challenged.

“Because you’re
being…” I lowered my voice, “… an overbearing ass! Out or I’m calling Jaxon.”

“Why would you
call Jaxon?”

“Because he’s
the only one I can think of who has the power to bodily remove you.”

Carter chuckled.
“Call him, then.”

I huffed and
turned away from him, making a valiant attempt at removing the nonstick coating
from one of my baking sheets. Not the smartest thing I’d ever done, but I
needed somewhere to focus my annoyance.

Carter set the
pan at the back of the stove again and turned the water off, handing me a
towel. “You done?”

“No.”

“Babe, you’re
not gonna call Jaxon and I’m not going anywhere. We’re gonna talk about this
and then it’s done.”

I felt tears of
frustration well up in my eyes and fisted my hands at my side.

“Cassidy.”
Carter sighed and pushed away from the counter. “I didn’t mean to make you
cry.”

“You know I only
cry when I’m pissed. I can’t out talk you when I’m flustered, and doing that to
me in front of Maverick was totally unfair.”

He wrapped his
arms around me, despite the fact mine were still at my side. “I know. That
wasn’t my intention, I just didn’t want you to say no.”

“I haven’t been
asked anything to say no to!”

Before Carter
could charm me further, my phone pealed and I stepped away from him to grab it,
seeing Kevin’s name pop up on the screen. “Hey, Kev.”

“Hey,” he said
brightly. “We on for tomorrow? I never got a response.”

“Ohmigod, Kevin,
I’m so sorry. Yes, definitely. Seven, right?”

“Perfect. I’ll
see you tomorrow.”

“’Bye.” I hung
up and set my phone back on the counter.

“Mom, can I come
out now?” Maverick called.

Crap, I’d
forgotten about Mav.

I jabbed a
finger at Carter. “Conversation shelved but not over, got it?”

He gave me a
cocky grin. “Yeah, baby, got it.”

“Come have
breakfast, honey.”

“Whoo hoo!” he
sang, and rushed to one of the stools at the island.

Carter set pancakes
and eggs in front of him while I grabbed syrup, and then we joined Maverick and
finished our breakfast without any drama.

“Maverick, go
wash up, okay?” Carter said, and Maverick jumped down from the island.

“Hands and face,
please,” I called to his back.

“Okay, Mom.”

“How about we
hang out, watch a movie, or play a game?” Carter suggested.

“It’s not like
we can go anywhere I guess.”

“That’s the
spirit,” Carter droned, and smiled. “Am I forgiven?”

“Yes, of course
you are.”

He kissed me and
we went about our day.

* * *

Monday was a typical Monday, I guess,
with the added bonus of pouring down rain again… in June. That was the Pacific
Northwest for you. Carter had offered to take Maverick for the day, rather than
me taking him to daycare, which meant, I got an extra hour of sleep that
morning, which made for a happy Cassidy. And Maverick was beside himself with
excitement to do “man stuff.” I didn’t know what “man stuff” would entail, but
Carter assured me there would be burping, farting, and general uncleanliness
involved, so I left it at that.

I’d had a rather
long day at work, considering I was forced into a meeting with several other
analysts and we had to video conference with our New York office. Good God, I
hated meetings, but we were being “introduced” to the new Vice President of
Accounts and we all had to look like we cared. It was exhausting. The new guy
seemed nice. Thomas Dale was British and attractive I think… at least that’s
what I was told. We were having issues with the feed, so New York could see us,
but we saw them for all of five minutes. The office girls were all aflutter
with him, but all I cared about was the stack of work waiting for me.

I’d been back at
my desk for almost an hour when I got a phone call from the new VP. A little strange,
since I wouldn’t have much to do with him, but I took the call anyway.

“I just wanted
to take a moment to thank you for your time,” Tom said.

“No problem,” I
said.

“Do you have any
feedback for me?”

“On what?”

“The meeting,
how it went. Perhaps something you feel needs to change.”

The question was
strange as I had nothing to do with his department, but there were always ways
to improve working conditions. 

“Yes, actually,
I have a few ideas.”

“Excellent,” he
said. “Why don’t you shoot me an email with your thoughts and I’ll look them
over. I’ll be visiting next week and I’d love to take you to lunch if you have
time.”

I pushed a stack
of files aside. “I have no idea what my week will be like, but I don’t
typically have much time for lunch.”

“Well, I hope
you’ll find the time for me. I must run, but have a lovely day, Cassidy.”

He hung up and I
sat staring at my phone for a second, a little shocked by the strange
conversation. I shrugged and formalized my ideas as I moved through my day.
Before I left, I sent a quick email to Tom and then shut down my computer.

I arrived home
to find Carter had cooked. Seriously, I was loving this side of him. I hated to
cook, so if he wanted to take that on, I was all for it. The only issue I had
was I was dancing in less than an hour and I never ate before a strenuous
workout, so Carter wrapped it up and set it in the fridge for later.

“Maverick
usually comes with me on dance nights,” I explained as I slipped off my shoes
and hung up my raincoat. “So, you’re free.”

“I don’t want to
be free,” Carter said.

“You don’t mind
watching him?” I asked, walking into my bedroom.

“I was thinkin’
we’d both come with you.”

I glanced over
my shoulder with a snort. “You hate ballet.”

“No I don’t.”

“Since when?” I
grabbed my dance bag and a clean leotard and tights from my drawer.

“Okay, I still
hate ballet… but I love watching you.”

I grinned.
“It’ll bore you, honey. Trust me.”

He leaned
against the doorframe and crossed his arms. “Why are you doin’ this?”

“What do you
mean?”

“I thought you
weren’t dancing anymore.”

I made sure my
toe shoes were in the bag and frowned at Carter. “I never said that.”

“Maverick did.”

“No, he didn’t.
He said I don’t do it as often as I like, but I still dance.” I studied
Carter’s expression. He looked irritated. “Kevin’s working out a new routine
and I’m helping him with it. He’s doing some showcase in September and his
regular partner’s in San Francisco until August.”

He scowled.
“Does he do shit like lift you above his head while his hands are on your pus—”

“Carter!”

“Just answer the
question.”

“Ohmigod, no I
won’t. You’re taking this to a level it doesn’t need to go.” I closed the
distance between us and laid my hand in the middle of his chest. “Now, go amuse
yourself while I get changed.”