Romance: Wanted by the Alpha Lion (A BBW Paranormal Suspense Romance) (Heroes of Shifter Creek Book 2) (49 page)

I never wanted to let her go.

IV.

“The ‘bar car’ is pretty wonderful,” Janie said brightly. “I may have to take a train every time now.”

“The train is pretty relaxing,” I responded. “I’m glad you’re a convert.”

“I guess I should go back to my compartment now,” she sighed. “Do you have a compartment?”

“No. I just get a normal seat usually.”

“My publisher paid for the private compartment. Do you want to see it?”

              “It sounds pretty fancy. Are you sure you want to share such an extravagance with me?”

              “I am absolutely sure.”

              We walked together quietly, weaving through the cars swiftly. She opened her compartment to reveal a smaller area than I expected, but it did seem nicer than just the general seats. She set her purse on the floor and laid down on the bed to stare at the ceiling. She looked serene there, stretched out to her full length on the bed. She looked more in shape than she had been when we first met, but at that time she had a youthful thinness so it didn’t make a difference. In five years, she’d grown more into a woman than I thought was possible.

              I sat down at the seats across from her bed awkwardly, setting down my bag. All I wanted was to lay next to her and feel the heat of her skin against mine. I’d missed her so desperately over all those years that I couldn’t resist her now. I wondered if I were in a dream. Perhaps all of this hasn’t happened, and I’ll wake up in my seat with a crick in my neck and an old woman staring at me from across the car.

              “Do you like the compartment?” she asked. “It’s fancy, right?”

              “It’s very fancy,” I answered.

              “I wanted one with a shower, but they couldn’t get it.”

              “How long have you been on the train?”

              “I’ve been on since Seattle, so it’s been quite a ways. You?”

              “I was up in Sacramento. It was hot.”

              “I bet. Did you play a show there?”

              “Yeah. For some reason I played in the bay before I played at Sacramento. I thought they should’ve planned better.”

              “Maybe. But then maybe you wouldn’t have gotten on this train with me.”

              “You’re right. I might not have.”

              She leaned up onto her side and looked at me with her hand holding her up. She patted the bed with her other hand, inviting me to lay with her. I took off my shoes and padded to her. She moved over to give me some room.

              “The bed is small,” I commented.

              “Maybe you’re just too tall for it.”

              “You did look pretty perfect in it when you were just laying here.”

              “They want to pay me to model the beds since I’m such a petite fit.”

              “Sounds like you have your second calling if the writing doesn’t work out.”

              She chuckled, looking down at her finger drawing circles on the comforter. We laid on our sides facing each other, one of each our arms holding up our heads. She looked more beautiful close-up with her freckles more apparent and her lips looking more inviting. Her cheeks had a slight blush that matched the red of her lips. I noticed the shimmer of her eyeshadow too and the flick of eye liner. It made her eyes stand out more, as did her new hair color. I liked her purple hair, of course – I honestly thought it was the coolest thing about her when we first met – but this was different. I liked seeing her as a more realized adult, not just a wandering young person trying to find some kind of meaning.

              Almost unconsciously, I leaned forward to kiss her. I thought, perhaps, she might pull away and slap me, but she didn’t move. She allowed my lips to caress hers. It felt just as natural as the first time I’d kissed her when we were out on a quiet coffee date. Her tongue tasted like spearmint Altoids as it danced around my mouth. My body started to heat up as we kissed, making my mouth more ravenous for hers.

              With my free hand, I gingerly brought her waist closer to mine. She chuckled into my mouth, but didn’t break the kiss. She felt warm and inviting underneath my hand. Kissing her made me forget all the disappointment I’d felt when I first joined the Navy, the horror I saw through my Navy SEALs days, and the sadness of soon losing my father. All that mattered was her, and I didn’t want anything to get between us.

              She reached for my hand and moved it under her dress. My body started to heat up feeling the wetness of her underwear with my fingertips. I carefully moved my hand up to the waistband of her thong and slid my palms down inside the scant piece of fabric. Her breathing became labored as I massaged her clit. She moaned after a moment, her back starting to arch toward me. I kissed her harder, pushing her down slowly onto the bed with my lips.

              Her hands trudged through my hair, her nails massaging my scalp as I warmed her up. She pulled away from my mouth to moan louder. I thought to cover her mouth so no one on the train heard, but then again, I sure didn’t care if anyone did. They don’t know us. She didn’t seem to care either, clutching at me to bring my body even closer.

              “Is this something you want to do?” I asked her softly. “We had some drinks, and I don’t want to take advantage of you.”

              “I’m feeling fine. My drinks weren’t all that strong,” she answered.

              “I don’t believe that. Mine were pretty strong.”

              “I told the bartender I needed weak drinks so I could make good decisions.”

              “And when did you do that?”

              “I wrote him a note on a napkin. He got my meeting.”

              “He probably thought you were slipping him your number.”

              “Enough small talk. Make love to me already.”

              I smiled before leaning down to kiss her again. She started to pull at my belt buckle as I slid her panties down her legs. I sat up on the bed to shimmy out of my jeans and boxer briefs; then, I readjusted my body to lay on top of her, hiking up her dress.

              “Are you sure you want to do this? We haven’t seen each other in such a long time,” I asked. “We could just make out.”

              “You already asked me if I wanted to do this, and I already said yes. Don’t cockblock yourself, DaVinci.”

              I laughed, feeling silly for asking her twice. She guided me to enter her, arching her body to give me more access. As soon as I felt myself inside her, heaven roared through my body. In my loneliest moments, I imagined feeling her from the inside again, but I never thought it would actually happen. Now that we fit together so nicely, I felt all my fears wash away. Being with her for just those few hours changed me astronomically.

              She moaned with pleasure, rocking her pelvis in the rhythm of mine like she were the drummer and I was the bassist in a harmonious band.  My body trembled as I moved deeper and deeper. Every time I thrust deeper, she moaned louder. I tried to move slowly to last longer, but she felt so amazing I worried about my fortitude. Yet, she seemed to be meeting me in pleasure with each thrust. I felt her tighten around me, making lasting even harder.

              “Oh Vince,” she whispered into my ear. “Don’t stop.”

              I followed her instruction and started to move faster, responding to what her body seemed to want. She arched her back completely, looking like an arch over some kind of water. I felt myself on the edge as she moaned even louder. It made my body go crazy with the sound of her. Then, we climaxed together, sending an electric current through me. I felt peaceful, serene, and on a new plane of existence.

              “That was wonderful,” she whispered before kissing me. “You’re an awesome guy, DaVinci Jones.”

              I kissed her back to show how much I cared. I had been in love with her, I knew that, and now it felt solidified.

              “Let’s just lay here,” she said softly.

              “Sounds perfect.”              

              We laid together in each other’s arms. I loved being with her, and I hoped the day wouldn’t end to take her away from me.

V.

              She rose from the bed and put her underwear back on. I watched her as she pulled them over her smooth legs until they disappeared under her dress.

              “I didn’t get anything on your dress, did I?” I asked her, not knowing what else to say.

              She looked up at me with a strangely deadly look that softened only slightly with the responding look on my face. “I sure hope not. I have to get off here on the next stop.”

              I sat up in the bed, hitting my head on the top of the bunk and cursing. “The next stop? I thought we had more time.”

              She shook her head before sitting next to me again. I could tell she wanted to say something serious, but I wasn’t sure if she actually would. Her demeanor had changed somehow from sweet and romantic to stern and cold.

              “I think this is it for us, isn’t it?” she asked with a voice so small, it could have vanished into the air like an air blown kiss.

              “What do you mean?”

              “I mean, we aren’t going to see each other again, are we?”

              “Of course we are. Why wouldn’t we?”

              “Well, you’re going to continue on to LA, and I’m going to get out here. Sure, you say your parents live near here, but you’re going to be too busy with them. We’ll text each other here and there, pretending that we’ll see each other again, before the texts just stop.”

              “Are you feeling okay? Was the sex not good?”

              “It was earth-shaking, Vince. You know it was amazing.”

              I touched her face, making her close her eyes and lean into my hand. She looked beautiful with her face still slightly blushing from the physical activity and tiny beads of sweat brimming her hairline like a crown. I didn’t want her skin to leave my hand, but I knew she would soon stand and vanish off of the train into a sea of other travelers and their loved ones.

              “So why do you think we won’t see each other again?” I asked.

              “Because I can just tell. When you’re faced with visiting your dad before he dies, you’ll decide to run away from it because it’s too hard. And then you won’t be able to show your face here.”

              “I’m not a person who runs away from my problems, Janie. I handle things head on.”

              She opened her eyes, her face still leaning on my hand. “You joined the Navy to find out who you were and just kept it up there even though you didn’t find out anything. You let that define you instead of real life. Now, that’s been replaced by your music career. Now that will come first.”

              “My sweet Janie: I have one show left, my show in LA. Then I can come right back up here to be with you.”

              She moved her face to sit up straight and stare down at her fumbling fingers. “Just like you were going to come right back to be with me in Europe?”

              “I told you what happened. It was out of my control.”

              “But you could’ve just come. You could’ve let that terror be terror on its own instead of letting it rule you. You didn’t want to.”

              “I don’t know why you’re reacting this way. Things were going beautifully just minutes ago.”

              She stood, gathering her bags together. “I’m devastated to lose you again. To have found you and then to lose you once more so quickly.”

              I stood to stop her from her manic packing and assembling. I brought her face up to look into my eyes. I didn’t understand her sudden anger, but then again, I guess I wouldn’t. I didn’t think she deserted me before – I knew I simply lost her.

              “Sometimes when I close my eyes, I still see the flames, I still smell the smoke, and I still hear the screams from that explosion. The death and destruction of it of course haunts me, but what haunts me more is knowing that you simply slipped out of my fingers then. I knew I wouldn’t get your letter, and I wouldn’t know where you’d gone. You never told me where you could be going.”

              “You’re right. I didn’t.”

              “And that tormented me. I thought I would never see you again, that I’d wander in a lonely, lovelorn state for the rest of my life. Do you know how many songs on my albums are about you?” She shook her head. “Too many to count. There have been times where all I did was think of you. I couldn’t get you out of my head.”

              “So, why don’t you come with me now? Cancel that show and come this time.”

              I looked into her eyes. I felt like I was transported to the moment in the Russian apartment when she told me she was going and she begged me to join her. Her eyes had pleaded with me just as her voice had, and all I wanted was just to agree. I didn’t care to finish the mission at all if it meant not having her. She’d given me back my life with a pretty smile and a kiss.

              “I can’t cancel the show,” I said finally, tracing the line of her face and her jaw with my finger. “But I swear to you, I’ll come back. I swear.”

              She took a deep, withering sigh. “I just don’t know if I believe that, DaVinci.”

              In her eyes, I saw she didn’t. When I thought about it, deep down, I wondered if I believed it either. Part of me had wanted to just abandon Dad, especially when I heard him light another cigarette when the sound of the cancer eating his throat and lungs rang through his voice. I’d seen so much death, why would I return to see more? She’d distracted me from the idea, but that didn’t make it all the less real.

But that did not mean I could let myself watch her walk away again. It wasn’t the same.

The train started to slow down as it approached the stop. I picked up my bag and then helped with hers.We moved to one of the exit doors.

“The train made this little daydream last longer than it should have,” she said softly. “But I’m glad to have seen you again and spent this time with you.”

“I’m glad too,” I replied, tucking an errant hair behind her ear. “It made my day… hell, my
year
to see you. “

“It made mine too,” she smiled sadly. “Good luck with your show.”

“Thanks. Good luck with your interview.”

“Oh right. I completely forgot about that. Thanks for reminding me.”

The train completely stopped and people started getting out. Before she could turn around and leave, I kissed her like I’d never see her again. When I gave her a goodbye kiss before, I thought I would be able to travel to meet her. This time, I didn’t know, even if I promised I did.

She hugged me, tears dripping down onto my neck. With another brief kiss, she got off the train.

Before I could lose sight of her, I called, “Maybe I’ll see you around?”

She looked back with a slight smile. “I’m around, so you’re bound to see me.”

I watched her go in the doorway until one of the train staff told me to move. I switched to watch her out the window, but she quickly vanished into the sea of the train station. Part of me wanted to run after her, but another part knew I had to keep to my duty. Even if my duty didn’t compare to her.

I traveled back to the seat I’d sat in before she came into my life again. Everyone who’d been sitting there before had changed to someone else. New passengers started to board to replace the ones that had gone. I felt my heart drop watching them – we can be replaced so easily with a blink of the eye. No one would even notice.

              I pulled my bag up onto my lap to look for my phone and headphones. Time for sad music. When I pulled it out, I noticed a book inside that I hadn’t seen before:
European Dreams
by Janie Bloom. I opened it to see an inscription on the title page.

              “Dearest DaVinci,” it read, “I always keep a book on me just in case I need to hand one out to someone who may want it. So, this one is for you. I hope you don’t read it and find me to be some creepy, crazy, lovelorn idiot. I wrote this when I thought you’d deserted me when I still loved you. Now, I know you didn’t, but I still, even now, love you more than ever. Love, Janie.”

              She wrote her number under her name. I traced the letters, feeling her hand just from the proxy of her writing. After a moment, I opened the book completely to begin reading. The first scene told of the face of the musician in front of her favorite coffee shop – “Tall and handsome, he made me believe that more beauty than I ever expected lived in Russia. I wanted to hear him sing songs about me, about my purple hair and the way I listened to him as he played alone with no one noticing the glitter of his special uniqueness and magic.”

              The book mainly focused on our love affair – how it started with so much promise, but ended so quickly. I felt hooked by every page, unable to put it down. She wrote of the depression she felt when it seemed certain she wouldn’t hear from me again, that it felt like her “heart had been ripped out of her body, filled with cement, and then replaced to weigh down the whole body that held it in caged fingers.” I hadn’t expected the pure honesty about how she felt. I thought it would only skim over our time together because, well, it was so brief.

              When I looked up from the book to the window, I noticed the darkness outside engulfing the train. I’d waited too long; I couldn’t get off now. I’d have to just let the travel do its course. I leaned back into the chair and imagined seeing her gorgeous, sexy face again, looking at me and welcoming me home with a smile of pure love and forgiveness.