Running Home (5 page)

Pulling up back to the
café, I noticed there were several people still in the store part, and it was a little after five. Mom normally locked the doors a little before five, so she could get home and have dinner ready for dad, when he got home from the fields at a little after six.

Opening the back door
, I let Waylon slink out, and watched him stroll slowly over to the steps for our apartment. I laughed as he gradually lifted his body up the steps to the door; I’m betting his dinner won’t get touched until way later tonight, after all the snacks he got today. I walked over to the back door of the shop and headed in to see if mom needed any help getting the customers out the door. The smell of fresh baked apple pies was evident in the air as I quickly did a glance around the kitchen to see if she left one out for me to take upstairs. “Jackpot,” I exclaimed when I noticed a single pie neatly wrapped for my taking later. Nothing was better than mom’s fresh made pies; I’m pretty sure every woman in the county just stopped baking and picks up their goodies here at the shop.

“Walker
, my boy, would you grab that last pie off the counter please and take it out to Mr. Scott out front,” Mom said as she rushed into the room, franticly searching for something on one of the cooling racks. “Sure, Mom,” I replied with a sigh. Apparently, this delectable dish was not going to be enjoyed by myself tonight.

“Mr. Scott, I believe this is yours,” I said
, as I rounded the counter in the small shop. “Walker, when did you sneak in? Did you catch the Crimson Tide game last week? I swear boy, you should have been playing for them,” Mr. Scott chattered, as I held out the pie for him to take.

“Football was fun
, Mr. Scott, but I’m really happy being a part of the Sheriff’s Department.”

“I know;
just can’t believe you gave it up to stay here,” Mr. Scott muttered, as he took the pie out of my hands.

“Now
, you better not be giving my boy a hard time there, Dale,” Mom scolded, while she walked into to the room, carrying a cake shaped box.

“Wouldn’t dream of
it, Mrs. Mason,” he snickered. “Jayme, my dear, can you grab that box from Mrs. Mason for me?”

I didn’t even notice the small woman standing to the side of Mr. Scott
, as she reached over and gently took the box from Mom. I’ve never seen her in town before; she’s got to be some relative of his, considering she is way too young and good looking to become his fourth wife. “Here, Sweetie, make sure you have a good hold on the bottom,” Mom directed the girl, as she shifted the weight of the cake in her arms and offered a small smile.

“Where are my manners today? Mrs. Mason, Walker, this is Jayme
, my niece. My brother and his wife are in town to help celebrate Mom’s seventy seventh birthday tomorrow.” Mr. Scott beams as he sent a wink in my direction.

I can only offer a snort; I know where this was going. He brought her with him to ‘introduce’ me to her
, in hopes of making a match. Everyone in this town was dying to see me ‘settle down’ and start a family. I could guarantee that wasn’t happening anytime soon.

Jayme
was pretty, but was too quiet for my liking. Having Carmen as my best friend for so long made me gravitate to women who were loud and assertive. This meek little girl wasn’t my normal pickings;
well shit,
I thought,
did I actually go after women anymore
?

“Here
, let me get that for you,” I stated, while reaching for the box in Jayme’s arms.

“
Thank you,” she quietly replied, and carefully handed over the box.

“What a southern gentleman,” Mr. Scott remarked
, as he nodded at Mom. I diverted my stare so I could roll my eyes at the comment; I only had to wait a couple seconds for what was coming next.

“How about you swing by and keep Jayme
company tomorrow, Walker? I’m sure she would love the company amongst all the old stuffy grownups,” Mr. Scott chuckled, as he headed for the door.

Bingo
,
I knew something like that was in the works. Who didn’t try setting me up with someone in this town? Apparently, it was no longer just the women that played match makers around here.

“I’m sorry
, Jayme; I have to be on call tomorrow. However, I am free tonight. Would you like to go grab a bite to eat with me?” Since I wouldn’t be eating any of the pie Mom made me give Mr. Scott, I might as well head out and get a bite to eat.

Jayme just nodded her head
, and flashed me a small smile; I had a feeling it was going to be like pulling teeth to get her to talk tonight. I glanced over at Mr. Scott and my mom, who looked like the heavens had opened up and started raining down millions. This was exactly what they wanted to happen; might as well make somebody happy it’s not like a love match with her was ever going to happen anyway. I’m sure I would be lucky to get a whole sentence out of her by the time the night was over. DULL was the turn my night had now taken.

“Can’t Hold Us Down” Christina Aguilera

Carmen, October 2009

“Cut,” the director yelled from behind one of the stationary cameras. Groaning, I rolled myself off the bed and quickly grabbed a towel and my robe. Nothing was worse than being nasty and sweaty all day long even more so after the final blow out scene. Swiftly, I wiped my chest off and slipped the thin silk robe over my shoulders, shuddering as the cold fabric touched my heated body.

“Nice working with you
, Babe,” Ace smirked as he stood there, apparently not caring that his ‘glory’ was out for the whole world to see.

Well then again the whole world probably has seen his stuff plenty of times
now.
Shit, didn’t he say this was his two hundredth movie or something like that
? I still had yet to reach the comfortable being naked on stage part, even if everyone in the studio just had a fantastic view of my crotch for the last four hours or so. My body is slamming now that my boobs were done, and it’s not like this was my first movie either; just my first starring role in a large company film.

“So
, yeah, um……….. it was great working with you, too,” I stammered, as I tried to keep eye contact and not look down at the monster hanging between his legs.
Keep it classy,
I thought to myself as I forced a smile, while Ace still loitered around.

“Carmen
, darling, we need to discuss getting you in contract with Virginal Films,” the director exclaimed, as he walked over to where we were standing and slapped Ace on the back. How these people just stand around here naked all the time blows my mind. Even when I was stripping the first thing I did when I came off stage was grab something to throw on I am proud of my body, but not everyone needs to see every hole I’m rocking at all times.

“Y
ou guys nailed that last scene; I was seeing fucking rainbows shoot out above your heads!” the director marveled, as I awkwardly shifted my weight back and forth on both feet.

“Thanks, but I need to get cleaned up. The photographers
want to shoot my stills for the cover in a little bit,” I spoke, while waiting for my perfect opportunity to slink away.

“Alright, go
get gussied up again, darling. You are going to make us a fortune!” he cheered while  turning inward to face my coworker directly.

Well shooting a video every couple weeks was easier than stripping
three or four nights a week. Besides, I make way better money now, when I actually do get booked into a strip club on promotional gigs. Video girls always brought a larger crowd in, than just the house girls, and pretending to have fabulous sex all day for a camera was easier than trying to shake my ass for a couple bucks for old stingy men. I have come to master the ‘oh baby, do me harder, faster, your cock is so big’ lingo that I was starting to get booked quite regularly nothing like being able to pay the bills, and have a room to yourself, to make it easier when jumping in the sack with a random dude. Or even girls, if the money was right, whatever it took to bring home the paycheck. I wasn’t going back to living with three girls, struggling to survive in the city of lights. People called, looking for me, and it wasn’t bill collectors looking for cash. I was becoming the ‘big star’ I always wanted to be, even if I was only recognized with my clothes off.

Sitting in the makeup chair
, I closed my eyes for a split second, until I heard the shrill shriek of the makeup artist from the doorway. “Carmen, you were absolutely fantastic!” she gushed while wobbling in her high as hell stripper shoes over to my chair. Apparently, if you have any sorts of brains and can manage saying a couple lines without screwing them up and having to do twenty takes, it makes you a badass in the adult entertainment industry.

“I wi
sh I had your skills to do that; I mean, it looks so natural for you.”

“Well
, I did suck a lot of dick in high school,” I stated, while rolling my eyes.

“Seriously? You need to teach me your tricks
, girl,” Cherri giggled, as she began to wipe the first layer of makeup off my face.

“I’m
kidding, Cherri, and besides, I’m sure you would be good at it too.”

“Sweetie
, I tried to be all sexy for the camera once and I looked like a cheap two dollar hooker,” she laughed, as she reached over and started peeling off the fake lashes that graced my eyes.

I glanced over at the mirror and started to see the real Carmen emerge from the multiple layers of paint Cherri spent hours on earlier. One great step up from stripping was that the amount of glitter my body needed was drastically cut in half; unless I was playing a stripper in the movie, then it seemed I had a gallon of the crap dumped on my body. Nothing like finding that shit in every single hole on your body for the next week, to make you never want to twirl on the pole again.

“Are you coming to the wrap party t
onight? It’s at Coconuts, and you know that means open bar,” Cherri smiled, as she applied a cream foundation to my freshly cleansed skin.

“I don’t know;
last time I went to one of those I ended up blacked out and couldn’t remember anything that happened.”

“Yeah
, but I got you home, and it was even alone for that matter!” Cherri snorted, giving me an irritated look.

I
t was nice only sharing the apartment with one other person, and the fact that we had two bedrooms was the biggest perk in the entire world. I knew the moment I meet Cherri that she was going to be a faithful friend; someone I could actually trust in this cold bitter city. And the fact that she kept her clothes on, for the most part, made her even more likable in my book. Living with three other strippers was tough; keeping friends in that industry was even harder. Once I got my boobs done and my dancing career started to pick up, the girls I was living with started to get nasty. It’s all sunshine and rainbows until you are top biller at the club, and the other girls get knocked into second place. Nothing spews hatred like a stripper who’s concerned that she isn’t getting that last dollar she felt entitled to.

“Well
, you know it’s going to be tits tonight, so you better come. I’m sure Ace will be there, and you know he can’t seem to keep his eyes off you,” Cherri smirked

I rolled my eyes and let out a little snort at my roommate. There was no way I was getting involved with anyone in this industry. The line is super blurry on what constitutes as cheating, and I’m not so sure that getting paid to have sex with someone other than the person you are dating is cheating.
Dating in porn is a huge gray area for my mind to try and make sense of; something I was never going to be able to wrap my brain around. I never did relationships anyway. The closest thing I had was Walker. I miss that boy and his perfect life; I would have killed to be a part of it, but I knew what toxic sludge my life would bring to his if I tried to join in. I loved him too much to let my crazy ass bring him down to my level. Besides, that town was way too small for me, anyhow.

“Thanks
, Sweetheart. Make sure you call the office to get the promotional dates okay?” the photographer commented, as I walked off the set and over to the chair containing my normal clothes.

“Will do;
thanks again,” I replied, as I slipped into my jeans and threw the tank top over my head. 

The second best thing about having my boobs done was I no longer needed a
bra; these puppies weren’t heading south anytime soon.  I grabbed my bag and went to stick my head into the makeup room to let Cherri know I was headed home; I needed a long hot shower if I was going to make it to the wrap party tonight.

“Hey
, I’m going to he…………oh sorry,” I stumbled on my words after seeing Cherri up against the wall with the director. “Um yeah, I’m going to go,” I murmured basically to myself, as neither of them bothered to look over at me. I hope she gets paid big bucks for this movie, because everyone knows the director is not something to look at.

I
quickly made my way out the door and over to my Jeep, and tossed my bag in the back. Taking a deep breath in, I started to cough as the poor air quality smothered my lungs
nothing like a little smog to almost make you miss the small town life
.  Rolling my eyes at the last thought that went through my head, I tossed on my sunglasses and put the Jeep in reverse. I let the heat of the day warm my body as I took the exit for the freeway. What a difference a year makes in my life.

“Carmen! Do yo
u still have that blue mini dress you wore for the Down South video release?” Cherri asked, standing in the doorway in a matching bra and panty set. I nodded and smoothed the rest of my lotion on my arms as I walked over to my small closet to grab the dress.

“So
, yeah, I did the director,” Cherri blurted out, as she walked over to my bed and flopped herself down on to it. I pulled the dress out from the back and offered her a small smile while handing it over.

“I don’t know what I was thinking! I mean
, one second he came in the room to talk about future work he wanted to me do, and the next thing I know I’m pulling my skirt back down and buttoning my shirt back up.” She groaned as she dropped her head in shame. This industry was famous for turning a good girl into a train wreck in a short amount of time. Sure, there were plenty of ‘bad girls’ that were basically destined for this profession. My whole town probably saw this coming for me. But it wasn’t for the weak or kind hearted; this was a cruel job in an overly greedy world.

“Just don’t make a habit of it,” I kindly said as I sat on the bed next to her.

“How do you do it? I know you have sex all the time in the movies, but I never see you bring anyone home, let alone show any interest on set. I feel like a sex crazed lunatic when I’m around guys and you are like a freaking monk who swore off sex forever.”

I
t’s not like I wasn’t into sex. Fuck, I loved it. It just wasn’t the same feelings when I was in front of the camera. Yeah, I still got my rocks off, for the most part, but the intimacy wasn’t there when someone is shouting hold that pose, spank that ass, or get ready for the cum shot. Porn had ruined the physical part of the relationship for me, and some guy was going to have to come up with something fucking fantastic to prove me otherwise. Most of the guys I’d been with were freaking remarkable in bed; I was going to need shooting stars and unicorns to make me open my legs for someone I wasn’t getting paid to screw. 

“Sex is just something I do for money; there is no emotional experience for me anymore. I don’t need a man or woman to make myself feel complete. I just want to survive in this world, have people know who I am
, and sex outside of the business always seems to complicate things,” I shrugged my shoulders and offered her a light side hug.

“It’s just dumb
,” Cherri sighed, while she wiped the mascara running down her face.

I gave her a small smile as I stood up and walked over to the closet to grab my dress out of the dry cleaning bag. I couldn’t help but let a
stupid grin crawl across my lips as I took the plastic wrap off the black lace dress. This was the biggest splurge I had made since I started doing videos. Well I take that back, this was the second biggest thing, next to my Jeep. I couldn’t resist not buying this short little thing when I passed it in the window, walking down Rodeo Drive. It took almost a full pay check to call this mine, but with tonight being my first starring role in a large movie, it called for an absolutely stunning number to grace my body. Besides, I wanted to look hot tonight, and not ‘stripper hot’; there was a huge difference between the two.

“Hot damn girl! That dress is on fire,” Cherry shrieked
, as she swiftly rushed over to where I was standing to get a closer look at the dress.

It was something to look at; fine black lace that stopped
mid-thigh and carried down to mid forearm. The lining was a nude color that matched perfectly with my summer tan, giving off the illusion that I was naked under the frock. I was pretty sure I would be the most covered up girl at the party, with the boat neck style neckline, but I was also confident that nothing mattered once I slipped into this dress. It was a dress that made you stop and take notice; I didn’t look slutty or trashy, it was an empowering piece of fabric. I looked like all women in this black number. I’m betting if I was to show up to a normal Hollywood party people would never know I did porn.

I hung the dress on the back of the closet door
, as I pulled a shoe box off the top shelf in the closet. Tonight, I was going to be the ‘classy’ girl in the adult industry, leaving a little mystery to my look. What I wouldn’t give to show up in that little old town now, looking like this. I’m betting mouths would drop open the moment I walked back into their lives.

Snickering to myself
, I walked into the bathroom to finish my hair. “You almost ready for me to do your makeup?” Cherri yelled from her room. Yep, I was going to look smoking tonight watch out Hollywood, Carmen is stepping out.