Save Me From the Dark (12 page)

Bella steps closer to me and my heart breaks a little more. Dawn slowly drops her hand from being held out and gives me an awkward smile. Jarrett reaches his hand out and Bella flinches grabbing my arm tighter.

“I won’t bite,” Jarrett tries to joke.

Looking down at Bella, I place my hand gently over hers. “It’s okay, baby. I’d never bring anyone around that would hurt you,” I speak as if I’m talking to a cornered animal.

The shaking of her body and the fear written plainly on her face set me on edge. This is not how I planned this night to go. Pulling her into my arms, I hold her against me, whispering softly in her ear.

“Bella?”

She pulls back from my hold slightly to look at Dawn. Her hold on me is still tight, so I know that she’s trying to pull on her brave face toward my friends.

“I’m not sure what your story is, but if it’d make you feel better I could tell you a piece of mine.”

Bella shakes her head slightly. “No,” her voice is soft and unsure. “You don’t need to do that.”

“Well, if you’ll allow me, I’d like to be your friend and maybe we can lean on each other?”

She looks up at me. My heart swells for her even more. Bella has been through hell and I’m sure I don’t even know half of it. Yet here she is pulling herself together to face the unknown because I said she was okay.

“I’m not good at this,” she says looking up at me. “But I’d like to try.”

“I don’t know your story either,” Jarrett speaks softly. “But I don’t need to. If you are important to my brother here, then you’re important to me. I’ll do whatever I can to help you.”

“You’re his brother?” The confusion ringing loud and clear in her voice.

“Not by blood. We are very close and have been for some years,” Jarrett explains.

With her voice shaking, she still tries to joke. “Did you do that whole blood hand shake thing that they show boys doing all the time on television?” She scrunches up her face.

“Ha, no, but I’m sure that Jarrett would have done that had we not been trying to keep our contracts.”

“That would have been so cool. We could still do it now,” Jarrett jokes. “Make for cool scars depending on how we do it.”

“Don’t you think you have enough?”

“Nah, you can never have enough scars. Each one a memory in the flesh. I’m a walking memory book,” he laughs.

Bella giggles softly. “Not a graceful one or just stupid?”

Now it is my turn to laugh. I laugh hard. Dawn is laughing right along with me. All the while, Jarrett’s mouth hangs open.

“Damn, babe, she knows you and she just met you,” Dawn said through her laughter.

“Well, now I’m just offen… Ah, who am I kidding? Everyone knows I’m just stupid,” he grins widely at Bella.

She laughs and my heart melts at the sound. Honestly, I’m not even sure she realizes exactly how unbelievably strong she is. It goes without saying what her past has done to her emotionally, but she stands here interacting with my friends as if they are old friends. Smiling, I hug her to me.

After a moment or two of small talk, I decide it’s time to get our night going. We walk out to the waiting car and all climb in. Bella sits close to me and I didn’t mind. The feel of her next to me drives me crazy, in a good way. The tension in her body is still there, but she’s carrying on small talk with Dawn and Jarrett. Bella cuddles into me. Honestly, it’s the best feeling in the world. My smile can’t be helped as I rest my head on hers.

Looking up, I see Jarrett smiling at me. He nods his head before pulling Dawn closer to him. She smiles at him and cuddles closer. I finally understand why Jarrett is so damn happy all the time. Being with someone you love is an indescribable feeling. A feeling that I never thought I’d experience before meeting Bella.

Pulling up to the restaurant, the cameras start. Immediately, Bella tenses next to me.

“Just keep your head down. We’ll hurry right inside.”

She nods and we exit the car. Wrapping my arm around her, I lead us inside followed quickly by Jarrett and Dawn.

The Maître d greets us immediately. “Hello Mr. Jergens and Mr. Vera, how are you doing tonight?”

“We’re doing fine, Philip. Is our table ready?”

“Yes, Sir, right this way.”

Philip scurries off in front of us leading the way to the private table I requested on the phone. It’s rare that I request a private table when coming here, but tonight it seems almost necessary to have that barrier right now. Bella’s panic as we pulled up in front of the restaurant is enough to prove to me that this is a good call. The last thing I want to do is give her any reason to run. No, from here on out, I’m going to give her reasons to stay.

Opening the door, he stands back allowing us to lead our dates inside. Placing my hand at the small of her back, I lead her to the single table in the room. Holding the chair as she sits, I push it in slightly before placing a soft kiss on her lips.

“This place is unique. You decide the style of food you want and they bring the menu,” Jarrett says. “What’s your favorite style?”

“Oh, uh,” she looks at me nervously, but just as I go to reply she speaks. “I don’t know. Look, to be honest, I don’t get to do this often.”

Dawn smiles at her. “I know what you mean. Jarrett was the first one to take me to a restaurant too.”

Bella shakes her head and I see her hands start to shake. Reaching over, I place my hand over hers. Leaning in next to her ear, I whisper.

“You don’t have to say anything baby.”

“Why is it that everything that spikes my nerves with you so far involves food,” she smirks bravely.

Laughing softly, I kiss her cheek. “I don’t know, but it does seem to, doesn’t it?”

“It does,” she laughs softly.

“Please don’t think you have to say anything on the matter. I can change the topic.”

“Are you sure they’re trust worthy?”

Nodding my head uncertain, “I’d trust both of them with my life. Why?”

She turns back to face my friends. “The truth is I was talking about eating period. My first
real
meal was this morning with AJ.” She brushes her hair from her face revealing the bruising.

“This is what I’m hiding. This is why AJ isn’t saying anything.”

Looking at my friends, I can see the shock and anger on their faces. Dawn’s eyes fill with tears as her hand covers her mouth.

“See my mom died protecting me and my dad has beat me ever since. Because of it, I don’t have or even try to make friends at school. But I’m also treated poorly there too. So, really, when you actually look at it, this here is new for me. Not just the food, but having… people. Now that you know, do you think that we can just move on so I can…”

Jarrett’s fist hits the table and he roars. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!”

Bella jumps grabbing my arm, muffling her scream in my arm. My heart tightens in my chest as I glare at Jarret for his outburst. He should know better, especially considering what she just told them.

Immediately, Jarrett sits down and apologizes. “I’m sorry Bella. This just pisses me off. AJ’s told me a lot about you from when y’all met online. You don’t deserve this.” He looks at me. “Tell me you’re taking her away from all this. Say the word and there’ll be a hit on this fucking bastard tomorrow.”

Bella’s mouth drops open. Shaking her head, she asks. “Can we just change the subject? I want to enjoy tonight. My life has never had moments or reasons to smile and laugh. I’d like to continue to have those moments while I can. Even if it is just for tonight. All I’m asking for is tonight, to be normal and carefree… just tonight. Please.”

Clearing my throat, pushing past the lump, I’m giving her what she wants. “Shall I order for you?” I ask with a smile.

She really has no idea how remarkable she is. Or even how incredibly brave she is. Watching her shoulders relax, she smiles and nods her head.

Once our meals are ordered, we begin to talk about anything and everything. The more Jarrett and I pick at each other the more Bella seems to be getting more and more comfortable.

“I can’t believe he’d do that,” Bella laughs as she looks at me.

“Oh believe me, he’s lying,” I laugh.

Jarrett’s loud burst of laughter has us all laughing harder. “I am not. He used to have to carry an extra change of clothes because of his nerves.”

“I think he’s getting him and I confused. Jarrett would cry after every performance and interview when we were younger.”

“Only because I had to listen to him sing,” Jarrett jokes back.

Soon our meal arrives and we all begin to eat. Bella takes a tentative bite of her side salad after testing several dressings. Her eyes grow bigger and a smile spreads across her face as she chews the salad.

“Good?” I lean in and ask.

“Yes, what is this stuff here?”

“It’s French Dressing. I like it sometimes. It has a refreshing tang, but for the most part I eat Ranch Dressing.”

“Thank you. This is so good. I could eat these all the time,” She smiles.

It is then I realize that in many ways, in many experiences, she is like a child experiencing it all. Honestly, it saddens me to compare her to a child, but because she’s been so sheltered due to her father’s inability to be a proper human being, she really is seeing the world for the first time right now.

Not long later and our entrées arrived. For Bella, I ordered her a small Ribeye steak with mashed potatoes and green beans. She stares at her plate as if the food is moving. Slowly, Bella turns her head to me.

“What is this?”

“It’s a Ribeye steak, mashed potatoes, and green beans. One of my favorite meals. Just try it. If you don’t like it, we can look for something different.”

“Okay,” she says uncertain as she looks back at her food.

After a moment, she picks up her knife and fork and cuts a small piece of the steak off. Taking a long look at the piece she cut off, she finally puts it in her mouth. A moan flows from her lips as she chews her steak. The sound flows straight through me and I have to shift in my seat slightly.

“Good?” I ask as my voice cracks.

Jarrett’s laughter is not missed by me, but I try not to focus on him. Instead, I watch as she chews up the bite in her mouth, licks her lips, and smiles at me.

“This is incredible.” She tries the potatoes and beans. “I’ve never tasted anything so good.” She frowns suddenly.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just wish I could eat more,” she looks at me, sadness clouding her beautiful eyes. “I’m sorry, but I’m so full.”

“It’s okay, baby. We’ll take it home and you can have some later if you want,” I smile reassuringly.

“So, Bella, what’s your favorite subject in school?” Dawn asks.

“I love my English class. The teacher has a special reading list just for me because I read through books so fast. She’s one of the good teachers. Actually about the only one, really.”

“Oh, I love reading. One of my favorite reads is
Tale of Two Cities
. Have you read that one yet?”

Bella lights up. “I have. It’s one of my favorites too.”

They start talking about this book and all I can think about is for one night, at least, she’s having the time of her life. She’s getting a normal life. Turning, Jare catches my attention.

“I was serious earlier,” he says straight faced.

“I know and I will let you know if it comes to that. Gary and I are already working on a plan. We are just trying to finalize everything before I bring it up with Bella.”

“She’s an incredible girl, even without knowing what she’s overcome.”

“I know. She captured my heart rather quickly and I pray she never lets it go,” I say softly.

“Me too, buddy. This is the happiest I’ve seen you, but seriously bro. If you need me, you let me know. I’m right there for you and her.”

“Thanks. I’ll keep it in mind,” I reply while watching Bella and Dawn talking amicably about books they’ve read.

She may not realize it, but she’s gained more than just me and Gary this weekend. She’s gained a family that will die protecting her.

Once we are all finished with our meals, we get a container to take Bella’s food home. Then we all climb to our feet, heading toward the door. Jarrett walks out to get our car. Taking this moment, I pull her into my arms and hold her close to me.

“Have you had a good night,” I whisper.

“Yes, thank you. I’ll never forget it,” she whispers back as she looks up at me and smiles.

“Still more to come.” Smiling, I ask her what I’ve been thinking about all night. “I’m off tomorrow. I’d really like for you to stay with me all day and I’ll get you to school on Monday. Please?”

Please don’t make me let you go.

Bella

Looking up into Ace’s eyes, he really wants me to stay. Could I stay? What would I be going home to? Nothing, but pain and misery. I’d love another
full
day with the only happiness that I’ve ever known. My heart, even though damaged and bruised, knows exactly what it wants.

Nodding my head, because I don’t trust my voice, Ace immediately smiles and kisses me softly on the lips. There’s a flash somewhere around us, but because of how Ace holds my face no one can make out who I am. Well, I hope they can’t. If my father sees me now, he’d find me and… a shudder runs through me at the thought of what my father would do to me right now.

“Are you cold?” Ace starts taking off his jacket as he asks.

“Yeah a little,” I say as I turn to look out the window with all the cameras flashing.

Working hard, I push off the nightmare that’s trying to creep in. Tonight is going to be all mine. There is no room for my nightmares and freak-outs to creep in right now.

“What’s wrong?” Ace asks as he wraps his suit jacket around me.

“Is it always like this for you? Cameras everywhere you go?”

“Not all the time, but I’ll be honest with you, a lot of the time. For the most part, they are good about keeping their distance. The big thing tonight is that I’ve come to a restaurant with a date. They are eager to figure out who it is.”

Looking up at him, I tip my head in question. “You’ve not brought dates here before?”

“Baby, you are my first girlfriend in two years. I’m not that trusting myself. So, I just shut that part of my life off and figured when it was meant to happen it would. And it did.”

The shock is hard to hide from my face. “You haven’t dated in two years?”

“No and to answer the question you’ve not asked. No, I’ve not slept with anyone either,” he smirks.

“I… I wa… That… uh,” I stumble over my words.

“You are the first person that I’ve been any kind of intimate with in a long time and what a remarkable moment it was too.”

Laughing, I slap his arm. “Stop it.”

Jarrett comes back in letting us know the car is there. “Hey guys, the car’s up. Let’s get out of here. It’s getting kind of crazy out here.” Jarrett looks at me. “I suggest curling into AJ if you don’t want to be seen in photos. The paps have already asked Dawn and I if we’d tell them who you were and if it was serious.”

Ace lifts the coat over my head, wraps me in his arms and we run out to the car. He keeps the coat over my head until the car pulls away from the curb.

“So where are we going now,” I smile a huge grin, trying so hard not to let the fears get to me.

“You’re enjoying yourself, aren’t you?”

I grin at Dawn. “I really am.”

“Good because we are on our way to
Elite
to dance our socks off.”

Though butterflies suddenly run loose in my stomach, I’m excited to be going to a club. I’ve never done any of this stuff before and I can’t wait.

Nevertheless, as we pull up outside of the club, the cameras start going and I can’t stop the flashback from coming back.

My hands start shaking. Ace wraps his arm around me and I bury my face in his chest as we approach the main entrance for the club.

“Keep your head down until we get away from all this,” Ace whispers.

Slowly, the past consumes me and I’m lost to the torture and pain. The present fades away and the memory steals me away.

“Where the hell have you been,” my father screams as I come out of the bathroom.

“I had to go potty. It’s okay Daddy. I’m right here,” I tell him as I smile.

“You think that brings me joy,” he hisses as he backhands me.

Falling to the floor, I start to cry. Just as I am about to pull myself up off the floor, his foot kicks my arms out from under me. My face hits the ground, flashes of lights went off behind my eyes. It looks almost like cameras. It made me think of Mommy. Mama always took my pictures. The sobbing starts and I can’t stop.

“Shut up! Shut up you rotten little brat!”

“My head hurts,” I cry, the bright lights getting worse. “Make the lights stop,” I scream holding my head.

“Bella, look at me. Please look at me.”

Ace’s pleading voice breaks through my flashback. That was the night that I was in a coma for three days. He’d fractured my skull in three places.

Turning my head, I look him in the eyes and break. The stress I’m putting on him is not fair. How I long to be the woman that he deserves with no baggage, but I’ll never be that woman. Is it fair to keep pulling him along with me down this path of certain pain?

He pulls me against him, holding me tightly. Gently, he rocks me back and forth running his hand down my hair and back. The shaking from the cries subsides after a few minutes until all that remains is the sound of my sniffling.

“Here Bella,” Jarrett says quietly.

Without looking up, I grab the tissue from him and blow my nose. Ace never removes his arms from around me, but I manage to get some distance between us.

“What happened, Bella?” Dawn’s soft voice asks.

I nod my head. “The camera flashes… They brought back a moment from when my father…”

Ace interrupts me. “I’m so sorry baby,” his voice cracks. “I know we need to talk about your dad, but can we focus on us tonight. I want to give you a night that he can’t take away. Please. Let me show you how much I love you. Let me give you tonight. Please.”

Lifting my head for the first time, my heart breaks again. Jarrett looks pissed off and sad at the same time. Dawn looks sad and AJ looks broken.

“How can you still want me around knowing how dark my life is?”

“How can you ask me to leave knowing how much you mean to me?”

In this moment, something breaks inside me. Or maybe it is coming back together. Either way, tears flow freely down my cheeks as I beg him.

“My mom loved me and left me, my dad hates me, no one stays around—I don’t want to exist in this world, I want to be saved from all the pain. But now that you have come along and…well… my days have a little light in them. The beatings disappeared when we started talking. The pain was soothed. Please, Ace, save me from—the dark. Save me from the pain, the loneliness, and the constant tears that never seem to end. Please—save me. Please… Please…” My voice breaks off as the sobs intensify.

Ace

It takes everything out of me to not pull her into my arms right away. Somehow, I manage to hold off until she finishes talking. But the second she starts pleading with me to save her, my heart breaks and a tear slips down my cheek.

Pulling her into my arms, I kiss the top of her head repeatedly. Cupping her face in my hands, I make her look at me. With a shaky voice, I try my hardest to make it through this.

“No one’s life is perfect, Bella. Not mine, and I know not yours. But that’s life baby. When I met you, I was lost in my own pain, in my own darkness. You saved me. If it’s the last thing I do, I
will
save you. You’ll have the life you deserve. I love you. Do you hear me? I. Love. You.”

“But…”

Pressing my lips softly against hers, I try to get her to stop her questioning what I just said to her. The minute our lips separated she continues on with her sentence.

“But what if you leave me? My father will embarrass you to get to me. Honestly, I don’t know what he’ll do if he finds out your with me. What he’ll do to me when he finds me,” she mumbles the last part.

This time Jarrett sits forward, reminding us they are in the car with us. It is obvious that Bella also forgot they were there when she jumps at the sound of his voice.

“Dawn and I are here for you as well. I’ve been friends with AJ for a long time. We grew up together. Let me be the first to tell you that I’ve never seen him with anyone the way he is with you. Do you know how hard it was to get him to talk about something other than you before he met you?” He chuckles. “Dawn and I would mess with him by saying outrageous things while he was talking about you and he never even caught them. You had this man before he even saw you.”

Dawn sits forward taking her hand. “That first time that you didn’t contact him for a while, you should have seen him. He was lost. He didn’t know what to do with himself. You are
his
light.”

Smiling at my friends, my heart swells for what they are doing for me…for my Bella. Though I’m not sure if what they are saying is hitting home yet, but I hope it is. When she turns her head and looks at me again, my heart stutters in my chest.

“Let me tell you a bit of my darkness. Maybe then you’ll understand where
Save Me, Moon
came from.”

She shakes her head. “No, you don’t have to do that.”

“I don’t
have
to no, but I
want
to. Will you listen?”

She nods her head just as the driver announces we have arrived back at the hotel. Jarrett instructs him to go around to the private entrance. We all climb from the car and enter the elevator. Pulling Bella into my arms, I psych myself up for the visit to my past that I
really
would prefer to stay away from, but I’d do anything for Bella. Even if it means reliving the moments I have been trying so hard to pretend didn’t exist.

Jarrett immediately disappears into the kitchen while Bella walks to the couch. She looks so pale and unsure of herself. It kills me to see her like this. I’m ready for this. Taking my place on the table in front of her, I take a deep breath.

“You don’t have to do this, Ace,” she says softly.

“I know I don’t, but baby, I’ll do anything in the world for you. Even this.”

Jarrett walks back into the room with four glasses. Knowing Jarrett, I know exactly what is in these glasses. He shrugs and says, “We’re all going to need this.”

Downing my shot of vodka, I look at Bella and start telling her what’s made me the man I am today.

“When I got into the music business, it was because my parents wanted me to. Honestly, I didn’t want to sing. I’d seen what it did to people and I didn’t want to be like that. My parents pushed me anyway. I was their child and needed to start supporting them. We had gone to several interviews and auditions. I purposely blew the auditions. Like I said, I didn’t want to do it,” I shrug.

“When I met him, he had several bruises on his arms, face and a ring around his neck. He told me he’d gotten into a fight at school with some kids trying to beat up a younger kid. Then his parents shouted his name and he jumped. Even at that age, I knew he was lying.”

Bella took my hands in hers. “You didn’t get into a fight, did you?”

Shaking my head, “No. My Dad and Uncle took turns on beating me for purposely screwing up everything. When I told my mom what happened, she told me that it was selfish of me to not think about them. She said I deserved what I got. After that, I worked my ass off to make sure I made them proud. It never happened. They just took my money and made
themselves
happy. So, when I turned fifteen, I asked the courts to give me say over my affairs, but they wouldn’t allow me that. That’s when Gary stepped forward and offered to do it until I was old enough to do it on my own.”