Scarred Hearts (Blackrock) (4 page)
We parked at the local supermarket and I grabbed a cart on the way in, dad looks at me with suspicion "I thought we were getting coffee?" he asked, "We are among other things" I reply. "I really forgot what it was like living with a teenage girl," he said. After an hour of walking around the store we were fully loaded, the cart was piled so high I think we might need an escort back to the house.
I got all the staples for a summer of solitude, Chocolate, coffee, popcorn, pizza, water, soda, I may have slipped in a bottle of jack when dad wasn't looking. Girly products, but that's when dad had enough, he handed me the credit card and told me he would wait in the car. I was about to protest when I noticed my name on the card, I paid the cashier who didn't even ask for ID for the Jack, and so I went on my merry way back to the car.
I was trying to cram everything into the tiny trunk of the sports car when dad came around, "Did you buy the store Bailey?" he looked at all the groceries in astonishment. "Nope, Just enough to get me through the next two months without having to leave the house" I say. "Oh right" he says and helps me load up the back seat.
Two weeks later and I am safe in the cocoon of my dad's house on the lake. I have not heard from anyone from Grove. I decide to check my social media page on the internet when I log in I see that I have two new messages and new pictures I was tagged in. I open the pictures and come face to screen with pictures of Summer's funeral. What the hell? Why would anyone put them up, I look at the name of the person who posted them and realize it was Emily, Ben's sister. I quickly delete the photos from my page and move onto the messages.
I haven't been on my page for about six weeks now, as I open the first message I immediately burst into tears. I see it's a message form Summer from the day before her birthday,
Hi Bails, I am here in the hotel waiting on Ben to show up. You should totally see what he did. He put rose petals on the bed and ordered champagne and chocolate covered strawberries! I guess you won't have to kick his ass after all. Night babe xxxx Summer
I read the message again with tears streaming down my face; little did she know then what Ben was up to with his romantic little retreat. I open the second message and see it's from Brad
HI Bailey, I was Just checking if you were doing ok. I tried to call but your phone is off.
later Brad.
I have to give the boy credit he is a persistent little shit that's for sure. I begin to look through my pictures and cry harder when I see how happy Summer was before Ben came into her life. I go to her page and see that her mom put up a memorial tribute to her, many of the students have signed it with loving messages even Brad. I notice Roger too had posted on it, so I decide to put my own words to it. Summer was full of life and made me smile and laugh since kindergarten; I have no words to express how my soul was ripped in two the day you left me. I hope you are in a happier place now. Love you always your best friend forever Bailey.
I closed down the computer and sat crying in my dad's office, I didn't notice him come in until he gave me a hug and told me everything would be ok.
"Shush, it's ok Bailey, everything is going to work out" he says. I sniff even harder trying to keep my tears from taking control. Dad helps me up of the chair and brings me into the kitchen. He has a cake box on the table and our coffee cups at the ready, "I picked up some cream cakes on the way home" he turned and put on the single serve coffee machine making mine a vanilla bean coffee. I sit in my chair and stare at the cake box, "I really miss her dad" I continue to stare at the box and allow my mind to go blank; I don't like these feelings I don't want the blackness to return. But weather I like it or not it is part of me now, and no one can take it away.
"I know, do you want to go see someone, to talk to I mean" dad says. I look over at him and see the concern in his eyes; I shake my head no and take the coffee from him.
"Maybe you should get out of the house for a while, go into town see what you can find"
"Yeah, maybe tomorrow"
He just nods and opens the box of cakes, he takes out a cream puff with jam and puts it on a plate for me" Remember I got you these in that little bakery on our road trip one year" he asks. "Yes I remember, I was fourteen and you had business in little town by the beach" I remember that trip, it was a spontaneous adventure, dad got a phone call from a company interested in his designs and wanted to meet him straight away.
We got into his car and took off; I remember we drove for about three hours eventually turning up at a coastal town. It was a decent size place and had a boardwalk and pier with a few cafe's and restaurants. Dad found a beach front motel and booked us in for the weekend, he said it was so nice there that we should stay a while. I had a huge smile and began planning my day; he laughed at me and said I had to hold on to that idea because his meeting was at two o'clock that afternoon. I remember hanging out on the pier while he was at his meeting, I walked up and down people watching when I came across a small bakery tucked away behind a fish n' chip shop.
I went inside to have a look; I was kind of hungry anyway. "Hi what can I get you?" said an elderly lady with an Irish accent, "oh I was just looking" I replied. "Well if you came in here to gawk then you can just turn around," she said. I was so surprised that I just pointed at the first cake I saw in the display case and said "that one". "Are ye sure, its that one you want?"
"Yes please" I said taking my wallet out of my pocket. The lady smiled at me and said, "it's called a cream puff, old family recipe" I gave her a half smile trying to hide my fear. She began laughing and said "not from round here then? Go on you can have it, sit down and I'll bring you some tea". "You are not from round here either" I said back to her, she cocked an eyebrow at me and gave a small laugh, "cheeky little bugger aren't ye" she said putting the cake down in front of me.
I sat in that bakery slash Cafe for about two hours learning all about Dublin and Mary. She told me the story of how she came to America and how she used to sell her cakes and pies from the back of her car before she the money to open the bakery.
"Hey" dad said bringing me back to the present, "I have to go back into the office for a bit, paperwork" he sighed. "Do you want to come into town with me?"
"Oh no thanks, I think I'll just stay here today and hang out with Jack" I reply, dad looks at me in puzzlement "Who's Jack? I thought you have been in the house the whole time you have been here" he asks while shrugging on his jacket. "Oh I have been, he is just an old friend," I answer. He kisses me on top of my head and walks towards the garage. "If you need anything just call me" he says and steps through the door.
I am left alone again, which I suppose is why I came here really but sometimes being alone allows the blackness to flourish. I get up off the chair and run up to my room, I grab my favorite sweater and my iPod and take the back stairs, which I found by accident yesterday. It takes me back into the kitchen where I open the bottom cupboard in the corner and at the very back I pull out my new best friend, Jack Daniels. I grab a coke form the fridge and a plastic cup I located in the pantry and made my way out to the lake.
I sit on one of the wooden chairs and put my legs up on the table, the sun is shining and the water laps peacefully against the bank. I put my iPod on random and pour myself a cup of mind numbing sweetness. Five drinks and a few hours later I stumble back into the kitchen, I hide Jack back in his secret resting place and head up to bed. I crawl under the covers and close my eyes, smiling, thinking of all the good times Summer and I had together.
The next morning I woke to the sound of lawn mowers and hedge trimmers. Ugh what time is it I think as I sit up and grab my watch off the nightstand, six am what the fuck! I slowly maneuver my way out from the tangle of sheets I found myself in; I look down at myself and realize I am still dressed in yesterday's clothes. Oh yeah, Jack, I remember now. I get up and start to undress while walking to the bathroom. I turn on the shower and step into the scalding water, I stand under the stream and allow the water to wash away the pain in my heart and then numb my skin. Finally I get out of the shower and decide to actually make myself look presentable today; I grab my favorite pair of black skinny jeans and a white t-shirt. I pull my hair into a high ponytail and dab on some lip gloss and mascara. By seven thirty I am in the kitchen making coffee for my dad and I. He comes into the kitchen dressed in a pair of black suit pants with a blue shirt and tie to match. "Morning dad, you are looking dapper today" I quip. He smiles at me and takes his coffee, "Why thank you sweetheart, I have a big proposal today with a big wig from DC" he says. "What are you doing dressed up? I got so used to seeing you in your Nickleback t-shirt and sweats" he says.
"I have decided to get a ride into town with you, if you don't mind" I ask. "That's fine but the stores don't open for a least two more hours and I have to leave in five minutes".
"No biggie I will just walk around and find my way through the town". "Ok when you are done just text me or come to the office and I will take you home" he says.
We head into downtown Blackrock and he drops me off at the plaza, it's a little area with stores and Cafe's. I notice one place is already open, with a line of businessmen and women waiting to get coffee to go. I decide to walk around and let the line die down a little.
On my journey I found a map of the town located in the center of the plaza. I notice the college campus off to my left and a few bars lining the downtown strip. There are some small vintage clothes stores, a bookstore, and an internet cafe and computer store. I head towards the strip to see what I can find. Walking down the street and see about ten bars, six restaurants, and a pizza place, wow this town really caters for the college students.
I walk on down the strip and notice at the end of the street on the right hand side is "Georges, live music and karaoke bar" I step closer and read the sign. Open daily from 3pm - 2am. No shirt no service, live music every Friday night and karaoke on Saturday night starting at 9pm. They even do karaoke in this place I say to myself, turning the corner to investigate further I spot two black motorcycle's sitting side by side in front of a tattoo shop.
I remember Summer and I decided to get a tattoo's for our nineteenth birthdays. She wanted us to match just incase we ended up going to different colleges, it was meant to be a reminder of each other and our friendship would survive even if we were separated by thousands of miles. We should have done it for our eighteenth birthdays; at least we would have it now that we were separated by much more than miles.
As I begin walking past the tattoo shop I hear a deep voice, "See anything you like?" I turn around and my eyes lock with tall, dark and handsome. He has the blackest hair most girls would pay hundreds for; it's slightly long resting just above his ears and falling into his eyes. His eyes are a bright green and shining, I lower my gaze to his mouth, his perfectly kissable mouth. Lips not too big and not too small and a nice shade of pinkish red. He has a five o'clock shadow lining his jaw and is looking at me expectantly.
I look up at him, I am standing there on the street unable to speak, my throat is bone dry and my mouth is doing a great impression of a fish, opening and closing. I am shocked to see another living person at this early hour and especially one so freaking hot. Oh my god, why am I still standing here? I take one last look at him and turn abruptly and begin walking at a brisk pace, I have no idea where I am going so I just keep walking, crossing the main road and up the slight hill, through a park.
I finally notice that I have made my way into the college campus. I stop to catch my breath and turn around looking for another way back into downtown without having to pass the tattoo shop. I see a security guard driving a golf cart and wave him down; he stops beside me, and just points in front of him. I look at him wondering what the hell is wrong with him; with an exaggerated sigh he says "Freshman enrollment is that way".
"Oh, I am not here for the enrollment" I say. "Dorm assignments are tomorrow, you're a day too early" he says back. I look at this guy and just smile and turn to walk away. I begin heading up the path until I see a big yellow canopy with a sign in sheet. There is a weird guy behind the table handing out brochures showing all that Blackrock University has to offer. He sees me and smiles "Hi welcome to open enrollment, sign here" he says pointing to a clipboard. "What is your major? Or have you not decided?" he smiles at me. "I haven't decided" I say "but can I take a brochure to look through". I figure I am here now I might as well play along.
"Sure and you can join that group over there" he points to a preppy girl standing with two guys. "Why?" I ask him looking a little confused. "That is the next campus tour, it starts in like two minutes, so hurry up," he says. Bossy much I mutter under my breath and make my way over to the small group. As I arrive the preppy chick starts to speak "Hello and welcome to BRU, my name is Paige and I will be your tour guide for this morning". I look at my watch and see it is already 9:30am. "So would you all like to introduce yourselves" she asks with way too much enthusiasm. One of the guys speaks up first "Derek" he says and nods his head at the rest of us. "I'm Dalton" says the second guy "Here to play football and snag a cheerleader," he says while making eyes towards our guide. "Bailey" I say and look at her.
"Well ok then, lets get started," she says as she starts to walk toward the building. She points out the gym, the swimming pool, which is in its own building. The main campus and then the engineering building seeing it makes me smile a little. Paige our tour guide catches my smile and asks "are you here for the engineering program?"
"No" I say and look away. She shows us into the main building and pointing out various areas, when she reaches the Art classrooms, she stoops down to pick up a poster that has fallen off the wall. While she is bent over, Dalton whistles and pretends to grab her ass while moving his hips back and forth behind her. What a douchebag, why did I even come here? I had enough of his kind at Grove. Assholes who think they can have any girl they want and treat her like shit afterwards.