Scattered Colors (17 page)

“Morning, sunshine,” she chirped happily.

“Morning, Spritely Stella,” I answered in return.

I felt Parker’s breath on my neck as he leaned in even closer. “So, you’ll talk to her but not me?”

Trying my hardest to suppress the shiver that shot down my spine at his closeness, I shut my eyes and inhaled deeply, holding it for a few seconds before finally releasing my breath. Stella’s curious gaze shifted back and forth between the two of us. “Am I missing something here?”

“Nope, not missing anything at all,” I spouted before Parker had a chance to open his mouth and state otherwise.

Turning back toward the front of the room, I did my best to tune out the conversations around me and ignore the questioning stares coming from Stella’s direction.

It was going to be a long day.

Biology turned out to be a million times more awkward than I thought it could have been. I’d breathed a sigh of relief when I walked into the room later that morning and saw Parker had yet to arrive. I’d quickly scurried back to my table and sat down next to Michael before Parker’s dumbass tablemate Seth had the chance to block my path.

“Hey, Freya.”

I looked over and smiled at the attractive blond boy sitting next to me. I couldn’t help but think of how cute he and Stella would look together. “Hey, Michael. How are you?”

“I’m good. Listen, I know we don’t know each other all that well, but I was kind of hoping I could ask you for a favor.”

That piqued my curiosity. “Sure, but I maintain the right to say no,” I teased. “What do you need?”

“Uh…” he looked down at his hands as he twisted his fingers together nervously. His cheeks had a pink hue to them as he turned back to me. “Do you…” He cleared his throat self-consciously. “Do you think you could, you know…maybe you could talk to Stella for me?”

A giddy smile spread across my lips and I couldn’t help but antagonize. “And what exactly do you want me to say?”

“Well…uh…” he stuttered adorably.

Seeing the pink on his cheeks turn to a bright red, I decided to take pity on him. “You like her, huh?”

“I-I…” He blew out a deep breath. “Yeah, I really like her.” He grinned. His shy smile was absolutely adorable. As I studied him, I decided he and Stella were adorably perfect for each other. I could picture them walking down the hall, hand in hand, smothering the area around them with adorableness. “Are you gonna help me out or keep making me sweat?”

I found myself laughing at Michael lightheartedly calling me out. “You know what? I think you might actually be good for her. How about this, instead of attempting to play messenger for the two of you, why don’t you just sit with us at lunch today?”

His lips quirked up, showing off the straight, white smile. He reached his hand out for me to shake. “I’ll take you up on that, Freya. Thanks.”

“No problem, Michael. You’re a pretty decent guy.”

He barked out a laugh. “I guess I’ll take that as a compliment. Try not to sound so shocked about it.”

I felt my guard lowering as Michael and I joked around. Surprisingly enough, as we talked, I found myself thinking he might just turn into a pretty good friend. That thought lessened some of the tension that had been sitting on my chest since the day before. Unfortunately, it didn’t last.

“Am I interrupting?” My head shot up to find Parker scowling down at Michael and me.

“Uh, hey, Parker,” Michael spoke uncomfortably. “What’s up?”

“You mind switching seats with me?”

“What? No!” I interrupted before Michael could answer. Parker ignored my protest and kept his focus on Michael.

“I don’t know,” Michael responded slowly, looking down the aisle at where Seth was staring back at us. “I don’t really get along with your buddy over there.”

“He’s not my buddy,” Parker answered.

“Since when?” I scoffed. “Isn’t Seth just another one of your little lackeys?”

Once again, Parker ignored me. He placed his clenched fists on the tabletop and leaned over Michael intimidatingly. “Come on, man. Do me a favor and switch me seats. I’ll owe you.”

“Michael, if you switch seats, I’ll kick your ass,” I threatened.

“If you don’t,
I’ll
kick your ass,” Parker countered.

Michael’s eyes bounced between us before he finally looked at me apologetically. “Sorry, Freya. But I’m pretty sure his ass-kicking would hurt more.”

“Traitor,” I hissed as Michael grabbed his stuff. “See if I help you now, you jerk!” I whisper-yelled as he hurried for the table at the front of the room.

Parker took the seat Michael had just vacated, scooting it closer to me than necessary. “Freya, talk to me. Please,” he begged. When I looked into the endless pools of his deep, dark eyes, I could see the sorrow shining in them. I felt myself weakening. That was, until he spoke his next words. “You shouldn’t have ever come to my house.

I was quickly reminder of how cold he could actually be. That was all I needed to steel my resolve toward him. “Lesson learned, Parker. You don’t need to worry. We aren’t friends, so I have no reason to ever come over to your house again.”

A flash of pain flitted across his features just as I turned away from him, trying my best to ignore it. I kept telling myself that if I allowed myself to feel sorry for him, I was only giving him the power to hurt me again. I’d already experienced enough pain in the last few months. I knew I couldn’t handle any more.

“Don’t say that,” he insisted with a pained voice. “You don’t mean it.”

When I turned my gaze back to him, I made sure I spoke with clear certainty. “I really do, Parker. You bounce back and forth from one extreme to another. I can’t keep up with your mood swings, and honestly, I don’t think I want to. You make my head hurt. I think it would be best if we just forget we even know each other.”

The anguish in his expression grew to an almost-palpable level, causing my stomach to twist into knots. I hated how intensely he made me feel. Be it happiness, anger, or sadness, when it came to Parker, everything I felt was way too extreme. I was scared by just how strongly I reacted to him. It wasn’t normal for someone I knew so little about to have such a substantial hold on what I was feeling.

“I don’t want to forget I know you,” he leaned in and practically growled in my ear.

“Well, you can’t always get what you want,” I responded. “Besides, I’m just the ‘pain in the ass’ neighbor, remember? I’m fucked-up enough as it is,” I hissed, repeating his insensitive words.

“I didn’t mean that!”

“Then you shouldn’t have said it, Parker!” I responded, slapping my hand down on the cold metal table. The sound rang out through the room, but I was too upset to worry about the attention the noise had possibly drawn. “Friends don’t say mean, hateful things like that to each other. Friends don’t go from being sweet and kind to a complete asshole in the blink of an eye. Friends don’t take their anger out on one another. If that’s how you treat your friends, then I don’t want you in my life.”

Parker didn’t respond. He shot up from his chair, sending it scraping across the floor and crashing into the wall behind him with a loud bang. Ignoring the surprised stares from the rest of our classmates, he grabbed his backpack and stormed from the room, leaving me reeling from our encounter. I couldn’t ignore the pang of guilt that settled deep in my belly as I focused on the closed classroom door. I’d hurt him and that didn’t sit well with me, even if he had been the one who struck the initial blow.

Lunchtime came with still no sign of Parker. Despite his cowardice during Biology, I invited Michael to sit with me and Stella during lunch. It didn’t take long before those two were so wrapped up in their own conversation that I was completely forgotten. I’d watched on in silent amusement as Stella went from shy and quiet to bubbly and hyper within minutes. Michael started out reserved, but the more Stella opened up to his company, the wider his smile became until I worried he might actually break a cheekbone or something. My initial inclination about them was spot-on. Those two were adorable together.

I tried to mask my dejection by pasting on a fake smile as the day progressed. However, I quickly learned that
acting
happy was utterly exhausting. By the time I walked through the front door of my house, I was physically spent. Sadness combined with faking enthusiasm I just didn’t feel had burned me out completely. My cheeks hurt from all the unnatural smiles and laughs. I didn’t care what people said, that thing about using more muscles in your face to frown than to smile was a crock.

As I kicked off my shoes and padded on quiet feet to the kitchen, the events of the day spun on a reel in my mind constantly. I’m better off, I told myself. Parker was too volatile. He made
me
too volatile. If I kept him in my life I was liable to go completely insane.

I dreaded going to school that whole week. I’d spent every night tossing and turning, barely getting an hour of sleep as I played the events of Monday on repeat in my mind. Every time I closed my eyes, Parker’s face filled the darkness behind my lids, glaring at me with such fierce disdain I could barely breathe past the lump forming in my throat. I didn’t have it in myself to go down to the beach to watch the sunset. I didn’t want to risk seeing him there. I climbed from my bed each night just long enough to stand at the window and watch as the sun bid its farewell to the day before climbing back in to the safety of my cocoon. Those sad, lonely moments made me miss my mother with such intensity that my body physically ached.

My father and I managed to eat dinner together a few nights during that week, but I could see it in his eyes every time he looked at me. He could tell something was wrong. By the ticking of his jaw, I knew he wanted to ask, but thankfully, he didn’t push.

Each time I saw Parker in class or the hallways, I made a concerted effort to avoid him. I’d even gone as far as to avoid the cafeteria come lunch time. For his part, Parker was strangely quiet all week: no jokes, no charming the teacher…just silent and withdrawn. It felt like weeks of friendship had disappeared in the blink of an eye.