School of Charm (15 page)

chapter nineteen

T
HE SUN WAS JUST COMING UP WHEN
G
RANDMA
barged into my room. “Up with you now. We've got a lot of work to do.” And she left.

I patted Deady Freddy's head. “At least you like me.” I think he did, anyway.

When I got downstairs, Grandma had a dress laid out for me.

“Go put this on so you can practice walking like a lady.” She handed me shiny silver high-heeled shoes. I slipped them on and my ankles wobbled as I went to my bedroom to get changed.

The dress smelled like mothballs. It was too big, and it was itchy against my skin. I looked like a little doll that belonged in Grandma's lit-up cabinets. She made me walk back and forth across the kitchen. Then to the front hall, down the stairs, and back up again until lunch.

I could hear Charlene upstairs. Singing, then starting over. Singing, then starting over. And Mama talking softly to her. I wanted Mama to talk like that to me.

Ruthie followed me and Grandma, copying us.

“Such a tiny thing and so good at walking like a lady!” Grandma cooed. But she said nothing like that to me. To me, she just said things like, “Slow down! Can't you smile? Don't stare straight ahead! Look out at the audience.”

Finally, at lunchtime, she told me to change out of the dress. We settled around her table. I wished I were headed for the pond with Karen and Dana. We'd never gotten all the cattails out. The thought made tears coat my eyes. I needed somewhere to put all this sadness, like Miss Vernie said. “Do you think I could work out in your garden later, Grandma?”

“My garden is not important. Getting you in shape for this pageant is. We're going to practice your walking some more, then your baton work.”

“Did Miss Vernie drop it off?”

“I'm going to go get it while you change back into your clothes.”

I thought about asking for my turtle. But Grandma would never let him back in the house.

Two little circles of red burned on Grandma's cheeks when she returned. She thrust the baton at me, hung up my dress, and handed me a book. “Now, put this on your head while you practice your walking.”

And that's what we did for the rest of the day. After dinner we went outside, doused ourselves in mosquito spray and practiced the baton until the sun went down. There were no smiles or kind words from Grandma like I'd gotten from Miss Vernie. Maybe Grandma was just a nut I couldn't crack no matter what I did.

 

“I
HEARD THE CROWNS FOR THIS PAGEANT ARE JUST
gorgeous,” Grandma told us the next day while we were all sitting on the back porch, taking a break from pageant work.

“We'll see for ourselves when I bring one home!” Charlene said, scrunching up her shoulders.

“I'll have to dust off our old crowns, Cecelia, and set them up in the living room cabinets. We'll have room for a couple more.” She winked at Charlene.

“I wouldn't be surprised,” Mama said.

“Have you prepared your statement for the judges?” Grandma asked me. “You might do well with that portion.”

“The statement? What's that?” I asked.

Grandma dropped her head in her hands. “Didn't Miss Vernie teach you anything?”

“Yes. Lots.” I swirled the ice in my soda.

“The judges expect you to say a little something about who you are, why you want to be Junior Miss Dogwood 1977, and why you'd be the right girl for the title. Miss Vernie didn't tell you this?”

“We were still working on things. We didn't get to it yet.” I ran my fingers over my charm bracelet. Two charms left. But I didn't even know if the bracelet would still work now that I wasn't allowed to go back to Miss Vernie's school.

We practiced walking again until lunch, and then we did more baton work while Mama was putting final touches on Charlene's dress. “Smile, Brenda! You look like you're in pain!” Grandma barked.

Ruthie lay on her stomach in the grass, watching. “Keep trying, Chip!”

“I am,” I panted. I didn't realize how hard it would be to twirl a baton in time to music
and
smile.

Later Grandma sat me down after dinner to work on my statement. “So tell me, Miss Brenda Anderson, why do you want to be Junior Miss Dogwood 1977?”

I shrugged. “'Cause everyone else in my family joined the pageant.”

“No! What kind of answer is that? They'll escort you right off the stage.” Grandma closed her eyes and pressed two fingers against them. “Most girls would say, ‘Because it's such an honor to be part of this long-standing tradition and celebrate all that's beautiful about North Carolina, like the dogwood tree.'”

“Why do they have the Dogwood Festival in the summer? Don't most trees bloom in spring?”

Grandma shook her head and groaned. “The Dogwood is the state tree of North Carolina. But we don't have festivals in the springtime; the weather's too uncertain.”

“It seems silly.”

“Well, make sure you don't say that to the judges. Everything is great. You're happy as a peach to be part of the Miss Dogwood Festival. Let's try again. So tell me, Miss Brenda Anderson, why do you want to be Junior Miss Dogwood 1977?”

“Because it's a great honor to be part of this lovely festival for such a wonderful tree. And I do enjoy working out in the garden with lovely trees like the dogwood, even though it blossoms in spring not summer.” Although, when I thought about it, I wasn't even sure what a dogwood tree looked like.

“Are you trying to be smart?” Grandma's face looked like someone had drawn her with their pencil pressed hard against the paper.

“No, ma'am. Well, yes, I mean. I want to show them I know about nature and trees. Really know when it blossoms. Really care about it. Smart that way.”

She smacked her hand on the table. “Don't mention the tree, don't mention the blossoms. It's not about the tree. It's about how sweet and lovely you are, not the tree. Just say this. ‘I am new to North Carolina, but I feel like my heart belongs here, especially in lovely Mount Airy. What more could a girl want? I'm so grateful to live in such a wonderful place that represents the best of the South with the Junior Miss Dogwood title.'”

We went over my speech again and again until I almost forgot I didn't mean a word of it.

 

I
THOUGHT WE WERE DONE WITH THE DUMB QUESTIONS
, but the next day we had to work on another. “So, Miss Brenda Anderson, why are you the right girl to be named Junior Miss Dogwood?”

I stared at her.

“Well?”

“I'm not the right person.”

“Well, they're sure to pick you with that answer.”

“I'm not from here. I hate dresses. And like you all said, I'm not pageant material.” I couldn't believe I said that. I sounded like the old Chip. But working with Grandma wasn't like working with Miss Vernie. She wasn't being nice like she was to my sisters. She didn't seem happy at all that I was joining Miss Dogwood. The only reason I wanted to do this now was to show Mama I could be one of her girls, too, because Grandma didn't care about me at all.

Grandma pressed her fingers against her eyes again. I wondered if she could push them right back into her head until they were stuck. “Okay. This is what you're going to say. ‘It takes a certain type of girl to hold a title. One who is charming and beautiful and kind. One who is unique and lovely like the delicate dogwood blossom. I am all those things and would be honored and humbled to represent the Dogwood Festival as Junior Miss.'”

“I thought I wasn't supposed to mention the dogwood flower.”

“Just say what I'm telling you to say, Brenda. And you'll be fine. You won't win, but you won't embarrass us. Just try to be a good sport when you lose.”

“Is that what you did when you lost to Miss Vernie?”

Grandma's eyes widened and her nostrils flared.

“I know the truth,” I said. “You didn't win. Not really. You lied.”

Then she slapped me.

It shook the breath out of me. It surprised me so much, I couldn't even ask her why she did it. I touched my hot cheek.

“You're on your own. I don't even care if you embarrass us. You are really not part of this family. Not mine. You are just like your deplorable father and nothing like your beautiful mama.”

Grandma stormed out of the room. I felt glued to the chair. No one had ever slapped me before. Cool tears trickled down my skin, wetting the tips of my fingers. I never guessed she hated me so much. I thought about talking to Daddy, but it was clear now that he hadn't been listening to anything. I was all alone down here in North Carolina.

chapter twenty

I
CHANGED BACK INTO MY CLOTHES AND RAN OUT OF
the house. I sprinted up the street to Miss Vernie's, stumbling and tripping, until I stood in front of her driveway. The trees swayed, almost like they were motioning me to come in, to walk back to the garden. But I didn't know if Miss Vernie was mad at me after Grandma had stormed over to her house. I probably wasn't welcome anymore. So I turned down the street and kept walking and walking and walking until I found that little creek near the tree I had climbed. My heartbreak tree.

I felt under the rocks, looking for some clay or muck I could squeeze in my hand, but there was nothing like the stuff in Miss Vernie's pond. I searched around for another cool rock, but I didn't find anything. I spent the afternoon skipping stones, chipping away at the picture of Grandma's mean face etched in my brain. And then I went over to my tree and jumped a few times until I could grab the low branch and pull myself up.

I sat in the crook of the arm and wrapped my arms around the trunk. I guess that's where I belonged. Out in the woods by myself where I'd once been so happy with Daddy and Billy. I thought about the time we spotted a rainbow after a thunderstorm, and the three of us went tromping off, determined to find a leprechaun. Daddy never ever told us we were silly for believing in such a thing. And we ended up finding three eagle feathers, a salamander, and a fossil. I rubbed my finger along the bark of the tree. Well, this is where Chip belonged, out in nature. But I wasn't Chip anymore.

I swung my legs off the branch, ready to climb down and go back to Grandma's. But I slipped and fell to the ground.

Pain pulsed through my left ankle. I screamed and grabbed it. It throbbed and hurt so much I threw up on a mossy log in front of me.

“Help!” I cried. “Help!” I kept screaming, but I knew I was so far back in the woods no one could hear me. I tried to pull myself up and walk, but my ankle felt broken. I dragged myself along the dirt of the forest floor, but I only made it a few feet before I crumpled into a ball.

I was going to be one of those hundreds of children across America who disappeared in the woods every day. I closed my eyes and everything went dark.

 

“B
RENDA
? B
RENDA!”

I winced at the flashlight shining in my face.

“Mama?” I pulled myself up and groaned, feeling the sharp ache in my ankle.

Mama ran over and pulled me into her arms. “Brenda, what happened? Are you hurt?”

I rooted my nose into her long hair. She smelled minty, like Noxzema. “I fell out of the tree. How did you find me?”

“When you didn't come back home for a few hours, we went to Miss Vernie's looking for you. She thought you might be here by the creek.”

“Are you okay, Brenda?” Miss Vernie was there too. Her robe hung down under her cardigan sweater.

“I think I broke my ankle.” My stomach was empty and my head was woozy. I looked at Mama's big startled eyes and started crying again. The pageant. How could I be one of Mama's girls with a broken ankle? “I can't be in the pageant like this.”

Mama's lip wobbled. “Don't you worry about that now. Let's just get you to the hospital,” Mama said. “I told you,” she said through her tears. “I told you not to climb those trees. That you'd fall out like all those kids across America who break their legs every day. I was right. No more trees, Brenda.”

“Okay.” I nodded and sniffed while Mama stood there fretting.

“Shush, now. Everything will be fine.” Miss Vernie rubbed Mama's back, and Mama sobbed into her shoulder, nodding. Then, with one arm around Miss Vernie and one around Mama, they helped me out of the woods to Miss Vernie's car. She drove us to the hospital and stayed in the waiting room while they wrapped up my ankle.

“Don't let them cut off my leg, Mama. Not like those hundreds of kids across America every day,” I said, my lip trembling.

She kissed my head. “It's just a sprain. You were lucky. I don't think they'll have to take off your leg. You must have an angel watching over you.”

I touched the charms on my bracelet and stared out the hospital window at the stars in the sky. Was she right? Had Daddy been looking out for me?

 

“Y
OU COULD STILL COMPETE,” SAID
M
ISS
V
ERNIE ON
the car ride home. “You'll have to modify your baton routine a bit. You've worked too hard to quit, Brenda.”

“Thanks, Miss Vernie, but it's more important that Chip heals right now,” Mama said.

“No, Mama. I need to do this,” I said.

“Why? Why is this so important?” Mama asked.

I couldn't get the right words to come out. “It just is, Mama. You'll see.”

Miss Vernie looked back at me in her rearview mirror. “You can come back to school and work with us again any time you like, Chip.”

“That's awful kind of you, Miss Vernie, but I want to keep an eye on Brenda,” Mama said. Then she turned to me. “If you really want to, I'll help you finish preparing for the pageant.”

“But, Mama, you don't have time for me.”

“Hush now,” she said in a strangled whisper. “Of course I do.”