SEAL Of My Heart (19 page)

They both drank in silence, standing in the kitchen as they often did.

Mrs. Morgan took Kate’s hand and led her to the living room, where they sat in overstuffed chairs at forty-five degree angles.

“So, tell me about him,” her mother said.

“I met him on the plane. It was like we instantly knew we were right for each other.”

Kate’s mom leaned back in her chair and looked up at the ceiling. She slowly lowered her gaze to look out the picture windows to a garden full of flowers beyond. Her expression was vacant, as if she was caught in a daydream.

“Mom?”

Mrs. Morgan shook her head slightly. “A chance meeting on a plane. What are the odds?” She smiled and pulled at a tiny piece of thread from the denim of her jeans at her thigh.

“Yes. That’s exactly it.”

“And he feels the same way?”

“Yes. I’ve invited him to come up this weekend. He deploys on Monday.”

“Deploy? He’s in the military?”

“He’s a SEAL, Mom. A specially trained—”

“I know what a SEAL is. I haven’t been living in a cave here.”

Her mother’s sharp tongue surprised her. She decided to go slow. “He leaves for about six months, not the two years most others do. He was flying home to say goodbye to his mother and father who live in Portland.”

Mrs. Morgan sipped her water, finishing it. “What does Gretchen think of him?”

“I thought you’d tell me yourself. I’m sure you two have talked.”

“She’s tight-lipped on this one, Kate. I couldn’t get diddly out of her, which is why I’m guessing this is serious.”

“It is.”

“Gretchen always has plenty of opinions about men. I knew when I couldn’t wrestle a single tidbit out of her she was worried she’d have to eat her words. So tell me about him. You haven’t told me anything yet.”

“His name is Tyler Gray, for starters.”

“Where’s he from?”

“All over, I guess. He lives in San Diego now, where his Team is based.”

“Okay.”

They both sat in silence. Kate filled the looming sound gap between them. “He’s not the reason I called the wedding off, Mom. I was making do. I was telling myself I was happy, but I’m not sure I ever was. I think I was doing what everyone expected me to do. Randy has been popular with all my friends for years. When he got interested in me, I just went along with it. Does that make sense?”

“No. I don’t know what to say, Kate. It never occurred to me you weren’t happy with this decision or felt pressured at any time.”

“I wasn’t thinking, Mom. Ever have that happen to you? You just go along with things because you’d already given your word? But what if you were sure you would be miserable? Would you still go along with it?”

“I would say better to figure out the relationship you’re in first before you start another one,” her mother said.

“I agree totally.” Kate searched her face and saw some sympathy there. Her mother’s eyes were pleading, yet kind. Not angry as Kate had expected she would be. “But Mom, I didn’t realize it until I got a glimpse of a life I could see myself living. With a man who is the perfect fit.”

Mrs. Morgan looked down at her hands which were folded in her lap. Her head leaned to the side as she raised one eyebrow. “I think you’re confused. I wish you’d have come home here before…before…” Her mother stopped and closed her eyes. Kate suspected it was so she would have to feel guilty for making her mother cry.

“What is it, Mom?” Kate said as she took one of her mother’s hands and squeezed it.

When Mrs. Morgan opened her eyes, some of her eyelashes were glistening, but other than that, no evidence remained that she’d been holding back tears. “Oh honey,” she said to Kate as she brought her hand up to Kate’s cheek. “I’ve been there. Way before you were born.”

With her mother’s
story still floating around in her head, Kate got into work early the next morning, anxious to get started on the after-the-weekend cleanup that had probably been left for her. While others of the Tasting Room staff usually had Mondays and Tuesdays off, Kate worked. She didn’t mind it. Keeping the showroom clean and sparkling was something she did with pride.

The idea that her mother had been in love with someone else before she married her father was like putting peanut butter on sushi. Her mom had met a young Marine who was on his way home for Christmas before his last tour in Vietnam. She told Kate they’d corresponded, even though she had a serious boyfriend she was expected to marry at the time—another man, not her father.

He changed my life that day. I was grateful for his service, but there was something about him I didn’t want to let go of. And I should have.

Kate began mopping down the tiled floor of the tasting room while she continued to think about their conversation yesterday.

His letters quickly got very passionate. I felt guilty for not telling him I had a guy. He wrote me every day, Kate.

She stopped and looked around the center where they had hosted so many happy wedding receptions. Hers had been planned for this sunny room, big enough to seat two hundred people, room enough for a small orchestra. She saw the garlands and flower petals everywhere in her mind. Heard music and was dancing slowly, all of a sudden alone. It was Tyler she saw when she looked up at her partner. Tyler smiling down on her. It was a lovely fantasy.

Sighing, she went to find her next chore.

It looked like a small wedding party had taken place last night in the showroom. Several bottles of their reserve label wine were open and only halfway consumed, bottles with a retail value of more one hundred dollars each. One looked like someone had been drinking straight out of the bottle. She saw pink lipstick stains neatly wrapped around the neck like a calling card.

The leftover chocolate truffles left in the refrigerator were gone, as well as a discarded box of chocolate-covered strawberries someone had brought with them. She wondered who would have stayed behind and partied since it wasn’t a normal tasting room day.

She immediately thought about Randy. She wouldn’t put it past him to have his own little pity party, and he’d have the added pleasure of knowing it would be Kate’s job to clean up after his night of whatever. She had no right to feel put upon either, since she’d broken off the engagement, but somehow she had an inkling he had done it on purpose.

She ran the dishwasher for the glasses, put all the bottles in a black garbage bag and dumped them in back at the glass recycle. She wiped down the highly polished maple bar top. She’d turned on music, since country-western music was her preferred soundtrack when she did housework.

She jerked and stood up sharply when someone turned it off.

Mark Heller stood nearby with his arms crossed.

“Kate, we’ve got to talk.”

‡

H
eller was fidgeting
in his chair, stalling for words before he crossed his long legs and folded his hands on his knee. As she watched him tilt his head and smile gently, she thought again that he would have made a good father-in-law. He did seem to genuinely care about people, and about her in particular. And she’d seen him chastise Randy, who had been self-indulgent his whole life, mostly due to his mother spoiling him. But one thing was certain: Heller was the head of the family concern and would be as long as he was alive.

“Kate, I am so sorry about all this to-do with the wedding. Your new fella kind of surprises me though. He’s a soldier, I understand. He can’t do for you what Randy and his mom and I can do for you.”

She wasn’t sure she was hearing correctly. Was he thinking she would sell out for money? That a life of comfort and privilege eclipsed a life of love? Did the man have ice water in his veins?

She’d gotten used to calling him Mark, but used the more formal term, due to the circumstances.

“Mr. Heller, I’m sure you understand about matters of the heart.” She searched his eyes and perhaps saw some vacantness there, a hollow core he didn’t usually let people see. Maybe he wouldn’t understand about finding and being with a soul mate.

“I care a great deal for Randy,” she continued, “and you and your wife have been wonderful to me, as Randy has reminded me many times.” She could see him stiffen at that remark. “You have accepted me into your beautiful family with open arms. It is with the same full heart I now must level with you. I don’t love your son. I don’t think I ever did, and I am so sorry to have put everyone through so much because of my lack of focus.”

It was the truth. She delivered it in a matter-of-fact way, trying to keep all emotion out of the communication, and it leached the tension right out of the air. She was proud she’d been honest with him. Maybe that meant the second talk with Randy had a more pleasant prognosis.

“What did he do?” Heller asked, closing his eyes.

“Pardon?”

“Did he mistreat you?”

What an odd statement.

“No, Randy—I don’t understand what you mean. I have no complaints there. I never have.”

Heller had lost his composure. The veneer of a well-ordered life had melted. For the first time since she’d met him, Mr. Heller looked troubled.

“We thought you’d enjoy working with us in the family business. You seem to be quite a natural in the tasting room. Sales is your thing, Kate. It really is.”

Except I’m not selling very well right now. Why don’t you understand about love? Where is love in your well-ordered world?

“It’s a fantastic opportunity. But it belongs to someone else. I’ve enjoyed working here—”

“You’re leaving us?”

She was taken aback. “Well, I don’t have to. No.”

“Because we would miss you dearly.”

“Well, I wasn’t planning on—”

“Harvest will be upon us in three months, and we have all the holiday parties to plan—”

“Well yes. Sure, I can stay—”

“I don’t suppose Randy will be quite up to speed with this big setback you’ve handed him, but he’ll get better in time. I think he’ll be right in the thick of things once he fully recovers.”

Recovers? Like from a broken leg or bee sting? That kind of recovery?
Kate cocked her head, sure that she’d missed something. “Mr. Heller, you
want
me to stay, then?”

“Of course, Kate. We love you like you were our own daughter.”

Now she was getting creeped out by Heller. She broke off her engagement with his son, shacked up with some guy for a couple of days, and he didn’t fire her
and
he still loved her “like family?”

Holy shit!

Heller stood up, extending his hand. Then he thought better of it. “Oh, hell, Kate,” he said as he grabbed hold of her and gave her a hug which she stiffly did not return. “I still consider you part of our family here at Heller Vineyards. And I guess this doesn’t change much then.”

He squeezed her and then gripped the tops of her arms while she looked on with incredulity. He was smiling, acting as if nothing had happened. As if all the wedding plans and the money spent for caterers, chefs, stagecoaches and Clydesdale horses was a mere drop in the bucket to him. It was as if she’d cancelled a luncheon date and nothing worse.

Without asking her anything further he placed an arm around her shoulder, “Kate, I’m glad we had this little talk. And I’m so pleased you’ll be staying on.”

He opened the door to the office and released her to float into the enormous, completely vacant tasting room space, sure that the echo of her thudding heart was shaking the windows.

‡

T
yler brought the
frog into Gunny’s so it could be properly displayed until Timmons’s situation was worked out. His wife had been charged with assault but released. And that meant, thanks to a screwed-up twist of fate, that Timmons would have to stay somewhere else. He hadn’t been able to spend one night of his retirement in his own home.

T.J. volunteered to be his babysitter, since he and Frankie had rented a three-bedroom apartment and were looking to add someone from one of the Teams who were just coming back off rotation. That way, someone would be home all the time and their stuff had less of a chance of walking while they were on deployment.