Second Down (Moving the Chains Book 2) (6 page)

Chapter 7

Bruised and Scarred

Rob

Mondays are always brutal, but this one has the potential to be fucking spectacular. I don’t want to be here, but I’m not given much choice. Mike and Alex physically drag my ass in the door to school. It’s not until Alex shoves me down into my chair in homeroom that my mental haze lifts, and the events of the past several days come rushing back to me with startling clarity.

So I do what I’ve gotten pretty damn good at. I tamp that shit down and pull my hood up over my greasy hair, slouching down in my seat to avoid the stares of my classmates.

I think I’m starting to like this ridiculous beard. Incognito seems the way to go. If no one recognizes me, they won’t recognize the asshole who lost his girlfriend the same day he got her.

I face the rest of the day on some sort of autopilot. Turns out lack of sleep makes ignoring people really easy.

Even Evie. Mostly. Kind of.

She’s back at school today and everywhere. Sure, we share most of our classes, but it’s more than that. I’ve always been aware of her presence but not like this. Today, I
feel
her before I even catch sight of her. An urge to look down the crowded hallway and boom! There she is, parting through the ocean of students. A twinge in my neck that makes me turn my head, and bam! Evie making her way through the cafeteria.

She won’t let me forget her, no matter how hard I try.

The door to the Biology classroom mocks me with its seeming normalcy. Maybe I should just skip. I sure as shit don’t want to sit next to Evie for the next ninety minutes.

“You look like hell, Falls.” Her voice startles me into alertness.

Dammit, I can’t even do a good job of avoiding her. I can’t do anything fucking right.

She gazes up at me with those big blue eyes. Our classmates move around us and into the room, stopping to stare at the freak show, no doubt.

I search her face for evidence. She looks like nothing happened. But when I close my eyes, I still see it. All of it.

“The bruising is almost gone,” she says as if reading my mind. “Just not enough that if I hadn’t concealed the shit out of it, people would have noticed and made a big deal of it. I don’t really want to have to tell the same story over and over again.”  

I clear my throat. “Yeah. I get that. You still look good, though. Better.”  

Alive.

“Well, it was really hard to decide what to wear this morning to make myself look normal when I can’t...um...can’t even put a bra on yet.”

She finally looks away from me, and yeah, I get it. I’m surprised she’s even talking to me.

“Listen, I...I’m gonna talk to Mrs. Anderson. See if she’ll agree to switch us partners. I’m sure she’ll understand.”

“You do whatever it is you need to do, Falls.” She chews on her lip viciously, still avoiding eye contact.

I have to tamp down the urge to pull it out of her teeth before she hurts herself. Still can’t believe I was kissing those perfect lips one week ago, and now she can’t even look at me.

“It’s not about me, Evie. Never has been. I just...I don’t want to make you uncomfortable in any way.”

“Thank you.” She suddenly snaps her eyes up to mine.

“No problem. You want me to do it now or wait until after class? I get that ninety minutes is a long time for you to have to sit next to me.”  

I’m vaguely aware that the hallway is completely empty except for us, but I never registered the bell. Apparently, neither did she.

“I meant thank you...for saving me. They told me what you did for me, and I just...I never got to thank you. I already thanked Mike and Alex.”

I have to admit that I’m kind of floored at her statement. I expected her to hate me, punch me, try to claw my eyes out, but being grateful? Not even in my wildest dreams. Or nightmares.

“I got an A on the Calc quiz,” she offers with a halting smile.

I know this. She turned around in class to show it to me. I looked away.

“Good job, Evie. I knew you could do it.” It’s the first time I’ve said her name that I wasn’t screaming it in a cold sweat and bolting upright in bed in a week.

“I had a good tutor.” She shrugs like it’s no big deal. “Thank you for that too.”

“Oh. That’s okay. You don’t have to thank me, Evie. Really. Must be excited to have your afternoons free again, huh?”  

Especially since you wouldn’t want to spend an afternoon with me, anymore
.

Wonder if I should still give her the chocolate I promised her if she got an A? Wonder what in the hell I’m going to do with the entire case of it that’s sitting in my room?

“Um, I’m actually so far behind on everything after a week of not being able to read that I wonder if I’ll ever catch up. Pretty sure I can’t get that top spot back now even if I try.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty under water too. Guess neither of us is going to be Valedictorian.”

She shuffles around a bit, looking down at her feet, across the hallway at the lockers, anywhere but at me. I can tell she has more to say, so I guess this is it. The part where she tells me to talk to Mrs. Anderson as soon as we walk in that door because she just can’t stand being near me. I brace myself for the inevitable as she takes a deep breath.

“Do you, um...do you want to try to catch up together? Seems a shame to abandon our competition and just roll over and hand the spot to someone else. We could, uh...meet in the library like we used to.”

Pretty sure my mouth is hanging open. Pretty sure I can’t do a damn thing about that right now. Does not compute. I don’t know how long I gape at her like that, but she never wavers, waiting on some kind of response from me. Maybe she didn’t mean it. She probably didn’t mean it.

“I’m sorry. I can’t. I actually...have somewhere to be right after practice.”

“Oh, uh, okay. Finally finish your 12-step program?
”
She tries to smile at me, but it comes off as more of a grimace.

“No. That’s uh…that’s over. No more 12-step program.”

She furrows her brow and bites her delicious lip again. “Oh. Well, are you doing something fun at least? Hanging out with your teammates?”

“If your idea of fun is being forced to meet with a therapist, then yeah. It’s gonna be a barrel of laughs.”

Her expression morphs into worry. As inappropriate as it is, I have to stifle back a laugh. She’s worried about me even though she’s the one that had the shit beaten out of her.

“You’re...seeing a therapist?”

“Yeah. Mom and Dad kinda had enough after I missed the game on Friday, ya know?” I look away. I can’t take her eyes anymore. Like I don’t already feel guilty enough. Now I can’t keep my damn mouth shut. Really, really wishing I hadn’t come to school today.

“No. I didn’t know. I mean, I know what you’re going through. Sorry, I didn’t mean I know what you’re going through. I have no idea. I mean, I do, but...I still don’t remember. I’m sure it’s different anyway. I meant...my family is pushing me to talk to someone too, but I just...I can’t do that.”

I blow out a controlled breath in response to her awkward explanation. “I wasn’t trying to unload my problems on you, Evie. You’ve got enough of your own shit to deal with.”

“Yeah. You too. I guess.” Her voice quiets with each syllable.

“So, uh. Listen, we’re late. I can skip if you’d rather not sit next to me, and I’ll catch up with Mrs. Anderson after class.”

I know she didn’t mean any of the stuff she said. She’s trying to be nice because deep down, that’s who she is. A nice person. A sweet girl. My sweet girl.

“We don’t have to switch partners, Rob. I mean, if you want to, I completely understand. But, we don’t have to. It’s up to you.”

When I swing my gaze back to meet hers, her eyes seem unwavering. She’s not throwing up her usual mask at me. Damn. She really means it.

“I already told you, Evie. It’s whatever you want.” I can give her one more out. It’s the least I can do.

“Honestly? I want to have to not walk in there late and have the whole class staring at me. They’ve been doing it all day, and it’s starting to wear me down.”

“Yeah, I know that feeling. Believe me.”

The little laugh she gives me is so close to the real thing that I want to believe it is. “People stare at you all the time, Falls. You should be used to it by now.”

She gives me an adorable little half smile, and a bit of sparkle is back in her eyes. Double damn. She really means it. I have no idea why, but this girl who I let down in the absolute worst way somehow doesn’t hate my fucking guts. I still hate my fucking guts, though. “You, too.”

“Totally different reason.”

I glance at the clock mounted on the wall. We’re ten minutes late for class.

I look back to her, waiting for what she wants to do. Do we go in late and draw more attention to ourselves, or just call it and find someplace to hide out until last block? As we stare at each other for a few beats more, I can’t help but feel that there’s a silent truce passing between us. A mutual admission of faults and guilt, and a silent pact to move on. I wonder what it is she feels so guilty for.

“I guess we’re never gonna catch up if we start skipping classes, huh?” She’s made her decision, so I’ll back her as much as she needs...or wants.

“Probably not.”

“Well, let’s do this then. Partners?”

“Yeah. Partners.”

“Well, for the next few weeks, anyway.” Evie gives me a quick wink, and opens the door to our classroom.

The thought of being nothing to her at all in just a few short weeks trips my feet as I enter the classroom. All eyes land on me, which is enough cover for Evie to slink to our desk unnoticed. She shoots me a grateful smile, assuming my clumsiness was for her benefit. It’s a small relief to feel like I’ve helped her in any way today. Even if it was by total accident.

Chapter 8

Demons

Eva

The dismissal bell for last block rings. My classmates gather their belongings as they cast not-so-subtle glances my way. Whispers of what happened to me spill out into the halls. This fucking day is finally over, and I scurry to blend in with all the other rats in the race. Not a likely scenario for the girl everyone wants to talk to and about, but I try anyway.

My heart pounds as all eyes in the hallway follow my path to my locker. With every brush of contact from a passing classmate, fear strangles me, and my body recoils. Each quick movement out of the corner of my eye calls my full attention. That only causes me to bump into more bodies. It’s like my gaze can’t possibly take everything in all at once, but damned if I can’t help myself.

No one’s going to hurt me. No one’s going to hurt me.

My rational brain knows there’s no one waiting to ambush me, but my body refuses to read the memo.

“Hey Evie. How are you feeling?” a faceless someone asks in passing.

“Fine.”

A hand on my shoulder. A shudder I can’t control.

“Welcome back, Eva. It’s so good to see you.”

A million more words and touches that blur together. My locker has never been so far away.

Sympathy is overrated. How long until things get back to normal?

All I want is normal.

That’s a lie.

I haven’t received one single proposition today. That’s a little bit of unusual I can get behind.

Rob’s tall form parts bodies effortlessly on the opposite side of the hallway. He never glances my way, never answers anyone who speaks to him. His gaze remains firmly fixed on his feet as he shuffles past. This is another bit of my old life I’d rather not have back. The part where Rob Falls is back to being a painfully shy boy who can’t even look anyone in the eye twists the knife that’s already lodged in my chest.

He looks...awful. Absolutely terrible. His mouth is set in a hard line; dark circles ring his dull eyes. He sports a scraggly, light brown beard. The typically put-together underwear model wannabe looks like he just rolled out of bed and came straight to school. After going on a days-long bender. Where’s the perpetually smiling, sparkly-eyed Rob Falls? The guy who passes me by is a veritable stranger.

So lost in the guilt I feel about what this has done to Rob, I barely notice the candy bar with a sticky note attached sitting atop my locker. Tears well in my eyes when I read the few words he wrote for me.

Proud of you.

            
 
I stare at the bar of chocolate until my vision swims. I always thought earning this reward would be a much happier occasion. Of course, I also thought I could handle being friends with Rob. That idea has backfired on so many levels it’s damn near tragic.

Jess puts a careful arm around my shoulders, eliciting a flinch that I can’t suppress. If she notices, she doesn’t say a word. She also doesn’t let go. I didn’t even register her presence at her own locker beside me. Her eyes are just as wet and full of tears as mine, her lips forming a soft, but sad smile.

“Well, I hope you’re happy with yourself, Eva. You’ve gone and ruined the most eligible bachelor in school. If he can’t get over this shit and get back on the field, we might not even make the playoffs this year.”  Kerri’s voice on my other side is quiet and low, but there’s no mistaking the venom in them.

“I swear to God, one more word, and I will bitch-slap you into next week.” Jess moves around me, getting in Kerri’s face in my quick defense.

I’ve never been so grateful for her as I am in this moment. But I can’t deny the truth of Kerri’s words. I just don’t know what to do about it.

“Don’t you listen to her, Evie. She’s just jealous because no one could ever possibly love her that much.”  

Kerri storms off down the hall without another word. Jess turns around to face me, wearing that guilty expression she gets when she’s done something wrong.

“Uh, sorry. I just meant, you know, since he cares about you so much that it’s harder for him.” She scrunches her face up and moves quickly back to her locker to finish packing. “Shit. I mean, because you’re friends. It’s hard on him.”  

She sighs and gives up whatever it is she’s trying to say.

“It’s okay, Jess. I get it.”

She turns to look at me with wide, worried eyes. “You do?”

“Yeah. Kerri’s right. He looks terrible. I guess it’s harder for him because he remembers everything, and I don’t. It had to be traumatic for him. And I mean, Christ, he almost killed a man. Who bounces back from something like that?”

Jess gives me a weird look, then glances over my shoulder. “Uh, apparently you do.”

I jump when a slender arm wraps around my shoulders. Why is everyone fucking touching me today?

“No, she doesn’t. She’s just better at hiding it than Rob is.” Alyssa shoots me a pointed look.

I turn to meet her eyes with a carefully controlled expression that doesn’t convey the discomfort currently rolling through me
.
Swallowing down the panic at her touch, I forcefully remind myself that none of them know how bad it actually was. None of them know about what Jackson really did to me. Alyssa can’t possibly know all I’m hiding.

Only Rob has seen what’s under my clothes.

It’s no wonder he’s so fucked up.

***

Band practice is good. Great even. It’s a relief to get back to doing something I love, something that feels so...normal. That is until people crowd around me to welcome me back and ask me questions. Every time someone’s skin makes contact with my own, I miss Rob. Sitting next to him in Bio was better than I even imagined it would be. I could breathe easily and not be tense with the constant fear that I’m battling against.

But he’s at football practice, and I’m here. As soon as we’re done with drills, I bail to the safety of the band room. There’s only so much faking even I can do for one day.                                          I can’t drive for another week thanks to my massive concussion, so I busy myself with sorting music while I wait for color guard practice to finish up. Alyssa and Jess agreed to trade off days taking me home. This lack of independence grates on my nerves nearly as much as all the sympathy.                                                                                                                                                                         A soft voice startles me from my pity party
.
“Hey, Evie? You busy?”

Alex saunters into the band room, still sweaty from practice.

I offer him a smile as he approaches. It’s not completely fake. I never in my life imagined that Alex Fossoway would be a welcome person to encroach on my solitude.

Looking around me at all the stacks of papers, I wonder if Jess forgot about me, because there’s no way football practice let out before guard. “I’m just...doing my thing, Alex. What’s up?”

“I, uh, wanted to talk to you about something. Is now a good time?”

“As good a time as any, I guess. Hey, did you happen to notice if the color guard is still practicing out there? Jess is supposed to drive me home today.”

“Yeah, they’re still twirling out there. I can take you home if you’re ready to go now, though.”  He shrugs as if he offers nobodies like me a ride home every day.

“That’s alright. I have plenty to catch up on. What’d you wanna talk to me about?”

He sits on the floor beside me and picks up a sheet of music, scrunching his nose and setting it back down in what I’m starting to see is typical Alex fashion. “You, uh, know Rob’s birthday is tomorrow?”

Holy shit, it is. With everything that’s been going on, I totally forgot. Not that it’s creepy I know when his birthday is or anything. Ugh, I really need to get over this. “You weren’t kidding about him not handling this well. He looks like absolute shit, Alex. Do you know where he’s going after practice today?”

He flashes his penetrating blue gaze to me, surprised. “Yeah. You know where he’s going?”

“Yeah, he told me today before Bio.”

“Oh, is that why you two were so late? You were talking?” He searches my face intently.

“Yeah, why?”

He looks back down to his own lap, fiddling with his hands. Which is unlike him. Even when he’s not acting like a jackass, Alex is nothing if not self-assured. “That’s good. I’m really, uh...glad to hear that.”

“Alex, I’m worried about him.”

He shrugs again. “He needs more time, I guess. Don’t worry. You’ve got enough of your own shit to deal with, Evie.”

I
almost
laugh. “That’s exactly what Rob said.”

“Well, he’s not wrong.”

“Uh, it kind of is wrong. He probably saved my life, and... I hate to see him suffering like this. He looks like death warmed over. Is he even sleeping?”

“Honestly?” He turns his gaze back to mine. “Not a whole lot.”

“I don’t know what to do, Alex. I mean, I’m not as close to him as you or Mike. And honestly, he seems really uncomfortable around me now, which I totally get. I can’t believe he missed the game on Friday. I don’t wanna be the reason he blows his shot at an NCAA scholarship. Some people are already starting to blame his current state on me.”  

Fucking Kerri.

“Who? You tell me, and I will go kick some ass.”  

Yeah, I can’t help it. I’m really starting to love Alex.

“Not important. Anyway, what are we gonna do? It’s been a week, and he looks worse than I do. It’s not right.”

“I know. That’s why Mike and I really wanna get him out of the house tomorrow for his birthday. Nothing big, ‘cause I honestly don’t think he could handle that yet. Just take him out to dinner or something. Get him out of his bedroom.”

“He’s been holed up in his bedroom all week?”

Alex shoots me a smirk. “Yeah. Something you two have in common.”

“What does you guys taking him out to dinner have to do with me? I think it’s a great idea, don’t get me wrong. You should totally do it. Don’t his parents have anything planned for him, though?”

“Nah, they’re working. Patty called off all last week, so she can’t tomorrow. And his dad? Well, his dad’s an asshole; there’s just no other way to say it.”

I remember this information from one of mine and Rob’s screaming matches. “That sucks.”

“Yeah. Anyway, it has to do with you because I want you to come with us. Think it’ll be a good way to bribe Rob into going.”

I go back to sorting through music. “Alex, I already told you how uncomfortable he is around me. I seriously don’t blame him. If you want to bribe him to go, then invite his Dream Girl. That might cheer him up. He told me they were over, but maybe that’s just his depression talking for him.”

Alex scrubs his hands over his face in seeming frustration. “I need to tell you something.”

The seriousness of his tone grabs my attention. “Okayyy…”

“What do you remember about Rob’s Dream Girl?”

I can’t help the bark of laughter that sneaks out of my throat. “I thought you had to tell me something, not ask me something.”

Why does Alex even care what I know about her? If he’d done his job as a wingman, I’d have never had to help Rob to begin with.

“Look.” He blows out a breath. “I know you don’t want to talk about what happened. Hell,
I
don’t want to talk about what happened. You lost three days’ worth of memory, right? Have you even tried to remember anything other than the attack?”

Alright, now I’m pissed. He has no right to act like I
want
to forget. “Just fucking spit out whatever it is you’re dancing around, then get the hell out.”

“Evie.” His voice goes soft, maybe a little apologetic. “
You’re
Rob’s Dream Girl. You just don’t remember.”

My head throbs painfully in time with my rapid heartbeat as I gape at Alex. His face swims before me like a heat mirage.

“Evie? Did you hear me?”

My mouth opens and closes several times as if I could automatically respond to that bombshell with my usual flippant retort. But…nope.

“Shit.” Alex’s panicked gaze darts between me and the open doorway. “Maybe Rob was right. Maybe this was a bad idea.”

That cryptic statement snaps me out of my daze a bit. Still, my voice sounds hoarse and not nearly normal. “What does that mean? What does Rob think is a bad idea?”

Alex turns his body to face me head on, his gaze boring a hole through me. He heaves a deep sigh. “I don’t have all the details to give you, but here’s what I do know. The day you were attacked, you and Rob got together. He finally came clean with you about everything. He’s been stuck on you since freshman year. Jeremy kind of put him on the spot when he put the idea in your head that Rob was into someone else. That stupid 12-step program that you made for him? You pretty much told him everything he needed to do to win you over. And I guess it worked. When you woke up in the hospital the next day and didn’t remember anything, he made all of us promise not to tell you.”