Self Destruct (19 page)

“
How about you fill me in on what that was about,” Reed suggested.  I nodded, feeling suddenly exhausted, and headed for the front door.  “Sure, wanna beer?” I offered.  “I have a feeling I’m going to need one,” Reed grumbled.  “I’ll bring two,” I replied. 

Rebecca

I woke up
in a dark room, slipped out of bed, and wandered into the kitchen.  The pills the doctor prescribed had dulled the nausea, and for the first time in weeks I was starving.  I stared into the refrigerator pulling out random items, and eating them.  I ate the first things I grabbed to dull the hunger, a slice of cheese, some grapes, a pickle, cold ravioli, and…well…pretty much everything.

A
iden's warm hand slid up my back.  “Let me make you something.” “I’m not sure I can wait that long,” I mumbled with a mouth full of food.  He kissed the back of my neck.  “I’ll be quick I promise.  Sit, let me take care of you.”  I frowned at him.  “You always take care of me.  When do I get to take care of you?” 

“Hey listen to me,” Aiden demanded, pulling me into his arms.  He kissed my forehead, where my eyebrows scrunched together.
“You have no idea the hell I was living before I met you.  Every time I thought about the corner I backed myself into with Vanessa I drank myself unconscious.  That was my plan the week I met you.  I had just returned from visiting her in New York.  You know all of this, but I don’t think I ever explained why I continued to talk to her or see her.”

He took a deep breath and continued, “I felt guilty.  I was afraid I broke her.  We got along once, but after our son was born she
seemed different.  It took some time for me to realize she wasn’t actually different.  I just hadn't really known her before. 

We had
n't even been together two full months before we found out she was pregnant.  Our entire relationship moved too fast.  We hooked up after a football game.  I kept waiting for her to stop me, but she didn’t.  We ended up doing it in the back seat of my car.”

His blue eyes latched onto mine, and I could see the torment that he suffered for years.  “One time I didn’t use a condom, and everything went to shit.  Both of our parents were gone on business.  We didn’t have curfews, no one was checking in on us, so we stayed out too late, did what we wanted, and there were consequences.”

"I thought she told you she was on the pill?"  "She did, but I shouldn't have left birth control up to her.  I wasn't ready to be a father, and I should have made sure it wouldn't happen." 

"Doesn't all of this sound familiar?"  I forced myself to look him in the eyes.  "How so?"  I braced myself to expose my biggest fear.  "Aiden we have been together for a little over four months now.  Half of that time I've been pregnant.  Do you think our relationship has moved too fast also?"

He sighed and grabbed a fistful of his hair, and tugged.  “I know you worry I'm going to change my mind about you some day.  You think I'm going to find out something or hear a rumor and stop loving you.  But, Red, you aren’t the only one with a past.  I tortured myself in that relationship. 

I visited her to remind myself of the colossal mistake I made one night after a football game.  I felt like I deserved her, and her cheating.  I didn’t really give a shit about it.  I hated her so much after she gave him up without talking to me.  I thought it would go away.  Maybe it was for the best, but I realized I never really cared for her.  I tried really fucking hard, but I didn’t have feelings for her.  Not good ones at least.”

“Aiden, I love you, past and all.  I don't think we've moved too fast.  But you're right, I am worried you will someday.”  Aiden smiled at me, his blue eyes blazing, and kissed me softly on the lips.  “Never going to happen.”  I returned his smile. 

He turned me around in his arms so that my back was against his chest.  He spread his long fingers across my stomach, protectively. 
I saw a scared look in his eyes before he looked away.  “Tell me,” I demanded.  “Tell you what?” he asked warily.  “What’s with that scared look in your eyes?”  

Aiden scrubbed his hand across his face, a sure sign something was bothering him.  “Le
t’s talk about it tomorrow," he stated.  “Aiden, you are keeping something from me.  Tell me.  Does it have something to do with the lawyers
he
hired?”

He sighed.  “Yes.  They came to the house
while you were napping.  They've been digging around and they threatened to bring up, uh, they…shit, can we talk tomorrow?” he begged. “They threatened to introduce evidence that I’m a slut, a drunk, and a wild partier?” I guessed.

He dropped his head and nodded.  “You can’t protect me from everything, Aiden.”  “The
hell I can’t.  I love you.  In two weeks you are going to be my wife, and you are having my baby.  I’ll stand between you and anything trying to hurt you.”

I studied his face, the hard set of his jaw, and the tension around his eyes.  Nick’s assault and my health had really scared him.  He needed to watch over me. 
I was used to taking care of myself, but he needed to feel like he could keep me safe.

“You need this don’t you?  To look after me?”
I asked him to confirm what I suspected. He caressed my face, and wrapped his strong arms around me.  He nodded, speechless.  I knew he was seeking comfort, but his firm biceps and tightly corded stomach made my body heat. 

I had felt desire for this man, but
suddenly I felt a consuming need.  My arousal was so forceful I ached.  I wanted to rub myself all over him, lick him, tear his clothes off and never let him out of bed. 

“Becca, honey, are you alright?  You look flushed,” Aiden asked, concerned. 
He pressed his wrist against my forehead to check my temperature.  “Mmm,” was all I could vocalize.  He chuckled.  I realized I had been tracing his muscles and dragging my nose along his firm chest. 

“You still hungry?” he asked amused.  I shook my head.  I took his hand, and led him toward our bedroom.  “You promised you would take care of me, right?” I asked, my voice husky.

His expression became serious.  “Of course sweetie, anything you need, I’ll do it.”  “Oh, I have some needs you can take care of for me.” He growled possessively, and a wicked smile broke across his angel’s face.  “Hmmm…Red, have your pregnancy hormones kicked in?” 

I froze.  I really didn’t want to think how he would know about pregnancy hormones, and all of my various
cravings
.  He cocked his head, examining the look on my face.

He picked up a thick book off the table,
What to Expect When You’re Expecting
.  “Kate sent this home with Jeremy.  I did some reading while you were sleeping.  You slept for a really long time, but the book says that is normal.  While I was reading I found information about the other effects of pregnancy.  I have to say, I was hoping you would experience this one.  I’m really looking forward to relieving your discomfort,” he said, and waggled his eyebrows at me.

He was reading about pregnancy.  Holy shit that was hot.  I tugged harder, practically dragging him down the hallway.  “Hell yeah, this is going to be awesome,” he announced.

I slammed the door shut behind me.  Aiden chuckled wickedly.  “A little anxious?”  I growled at him.  My need was so acute I felt feral.  “Take your clothes off,” I ordered.  He slowly tugged off his shirt, and I was momentarily mesmerized by the pull of his muscular torso rippling with his movements. 

He reached down and tugged at his belt.  The action jerked me out of my thrall, and I started ripping my own clothes off as if they were on fire.  Aiden’s jeans fell to the ground, and finally we were both standing in only our underwear.  Suddenly he dropped down to his knees in front of me.  His navy eyes sparkled and his face lit up with a sweet smile.  He placed his large hands on either side of my waist, and softly peppered my stomach with kisses.  “Do you have any idea how much I love you?” he whispered into my skin.
I stroked his soft blonde hair. 

“I know there aren’t words for how much I love you,” I murmured softly.  “No, there aren’t words.  I love both of you so much already,” he said nuzzling my navel.  I would have swooned at his loving words, except for the relentless pounding between my thighs.  His warm breath tickled my skin. His hands innocently stroked my belly were stoking a fire in my blood.  I squirmed, and tugged on his hair.  “Aiden,” I begged.

He moved suddenly, sweeping me off of my feet, and gently depositing me on our bed.  He crawled on top of me, his sweet smile turned seductive, and slowly began to drive me crazy.  He cupped my breast and pulled a tingling tip into his mouth.  I moaned and thrashed beneath him.  “Now, Aiden.  Please now,” I pleaded.  He divested both of us of our underwear, and in one thrust he was sheathed inside of me.

My climax hit harder and faster than I had yet experienced.  He stilled immediately.  “A
re you ok?  Did I hurt you?”  I laughed, causing wonderful friction where we were still connected. 

“No, that was wonderful,” I praised.  “So fast?” Aiden asked in awe.  I blushed.  “Hormones,” I muttered embarrassed.  “I was right, this is awesome,”
he replied in a gravelly voice.

The next morning I woke snuggled up next to a deliciously naked Aiden.  I stroked his chest trying to wake him in the mood.  “Woman, you are going to kill me,” he groaned.  He kissed me passionately, and began to move closer to me, when our door was tossed open. 

“Don’t you two ever quit?  The mattress gymnastics the two of you performed in here last night is more action than I have seen in a year,” Jeremy interrupted.  He leaned in the doorway with an amused expression on his face. 

“Is there a reason you barged in here?” Aiden
complained.  “Yeah, Toni called.  She said, ‘drag their horny asses out of bed, or I’m gonna do it.’  Apparently she is taking Becca dress shopping today,” Jeremy informed us.  “You're forgiven, now get out," Aiden said to Jeremy.

"
Pick out something pretty, what ever you want,” Aiden said, stroking my back.  “Really, we don’t need to go all fancy.  I just want something simple,” I argued. 

“Well I don’t.  We’re only going to do this once.  Just because we are going to Vegas doesn’t mean we can’t have a good time.  I’ve been looking into something.  If you are ok with it, I would like to take care of t
he arrangements. I'd like to surprise you.  You can pick the food, the colors, all of that, but the theme and location is a surprise ok?” How could I argue with him when he was being so sweet and romantic?  “Alright, I’ll pick out a fancy dress,” I conceded. 

Aiden stared at Jeremy still standing in the doorway. 
“Get out you leering bastard.  Don’t think I haven’t picked up on your hetero-curiosity.  Go find another woman to experiment with,” Aiden said to Jeremy. 

“Maybe it'
s you I’m waiting to get a look at,” Jeremy taunted.  “We both know I don’t do it for you,” Aiden responded, as if this conversation was nothing new.  “You’re right.  You better keep her locked up, looking at her is screwing with my head,” Jeremy replied, shaking to clear his head.

“Why don’t you go pull Toni into a closet and see if she does anything for you,” I
jokingly suggested.  Jeremy shrugged, seriously considering my joke. 

“Why don’t you hot stuff?” Toni asked, announcing her presence.  “Why not?  They need a few minutes to get dressed.  If you don’t do it for me then I’m obviously gay,” Jeremy answered.

They closed the door, and we rushed to get dressed before they burst in on us again.  We went into our bathroom and locked the door.  Aiden started the shower, and we both climbed in.  Unfortunately for my hormones the impromptu visit by our friends had cooled Aiden’s desire. 

“Do you think he was serious?” I asked, as I washed his back.  “I have no idea.  Jeremy has never experimented with girls that I know ab
out.  Maybe he is just confused,” Aiden answered.  “I’ve never experimented with girls either, but I’m sure I’m not attracted to them,” I thought aloud.  Aiden's eyes flashed.  “Is it ok if I imagine it anyway?”  I slapped him playfully. 

We entered the kitchen together.  Aiden walked around the island and started taking out pans, oil, and everything needed to make pancakes.  “Sit,” Aiden
ordered, pointing at a barstool with a pan. 

I smiled at his bossiness, which I found kinda sexy.  Actually, I found everything he did sexy lately.  Now that I had those anti-nausea pills I was really enjoying being pregnant.  Aiden cracked an egg into a glass bowl, which reminded me
I hadn't taken my prescription yet.  I ran to the bathroom. 

Aiden followed after me and handed me a tiny white pill and a glass of water.  “Thanks,” I croaked.  “You were doing so well this morning, I forgot all about your prescriptions.  After you’ve eaten you need to take your vitamin,” he reminded
me.  I brushed my teeth, and we returned to the kitchen. 

Toni practically
vibrated with unleashed energy.  She did not sit still very well.  “Let’s go!” “She needs to eat something first,” Aiden argued.  He started making dry toast and tea.

“How long does that medicine take to kick in?” she
asked.  I thought for a second. “About twenty minutes.”  She began nodding her head enthusiastically.  “Alright, eat your toast and doll yourself up a bit more.  You're going to want to see the dresses with some make-up on. 

By the time we get out of here your medicine should be working, and we
can have lunch before leaving town.  That is if all of this is ok with the boss man,” she said, raising an eyebrow at Aiden.