Seven Days (18 page)

“I’m glad it’s not,” I declared, hopping off the table and dusting off the back of my shorts. “I’m going down toward the water, you wanna come?” I asked, starting to walk in that direction.

“Actually, I was going to head up to the store we passed on the way in,” he announced. “I want to pick up a few supplies for tonight. For some reason, I really want to have a s’more. You know, we didn’t get those last night, and I’ve never had one made by my own hand over a campfire.”

“Oh, that sounds good,” I stopped and turned back toward him. “Okay, I’ll go with you.”

“No, that’s okay,” he hedged. “I’ll come and find you when I get back.”

“It’s okay, I’ll just come with you, and then we’ll head down to the water when we get back,” I offered, not understanding why he didn’t seem to want me to come with him.

With a deep sigh, he walked toward me, his eyes full of purpose. When he was within range, his hand found my cheek and he tilted my head up to look at him, “If you go with me, then I’m not doing my job right, Carrie.”

“What does that mean?”

“If we are always together, then you won’t get the opportunity to know what it’s like to miss me until it’s too late,” he dropped the statement like a bomb before placing a kiss on my stunned lips and walking back toward his truck. It wasn’t until his truck cleared my line of vision that I was able to process his words and start moving again.

He was right. Not more than five minutes past before I knew what he said was undeniably true. I missed him when we weren’t together, which hadn’t been often on this trip. I wasn’t destitute without him, but I knew I wanted to be around him as much as possible. I had no idea how I was going to function again after Britton and I drove away from this place for good, knowing that everything I was leaving behind wasn’t all bad.

The water of the lake was cooler than I’d expected it to be. In fact, the early August heat I was expecting when we pulled into the park was all but completely absent, considering it was an oven when we left Benson. We were only thirty minutes from Mexico and I felt like I was further north, even though the sun was still just as aggressively present as it would be anywhere else in this sun-drenched state.

With my feet in the water, I started to walk, taking in other people in their campsites, or just hanging out on the shore. Everyone seemed to just be enjoying the day, whether they were sun bathing or playing Frisbee or just leaning back in a chair drinking a beer. I saw fathers chasing their kids with giant squirt guns and mothers scolding them to be careful. Watching it all unfold, I was hit with a moment of clarity. This was the life I wanted. I felt my eyes fill with tears as I mourned the loss of something I never had. A real family.

I wanted to find that familial bond that all of these people seemed to have with whomever it was they were enjoying their day at the lake with. Was that dream possible if I didn’t leave on Monday? Could I ever really grow beyond the person I’d been if I stayed? And if I stayed did that make me strong or weak? The only thing I knew was that I wanted to believe with every fiber of my being that I was capable of owning that kind of happiness. That I was capable of recognizing someone who I would be able to share that smile and laughter-filled life with.

“Hey,” Ryan’s concerned voice pulled me from my thoughts. My eyes flickered to his and his hand came up to the side of my cheek to wipe away a tear I hadn’t felt fall in the first place. “I wanted to give you your space, but you’ve been standing here for a good three minutes,” he informed me, putting his arm around my shoulder to lead me back toward our area. Apparently, I turned into the crazy catatonic woman in his absence. “I figured I should get some sunblock on those pink shoulders if I have any hope of getting you naked and underneath me later tonight,” he smiled down at me, letting me know that he was going to let me work out my conflicted feelings on my own. The fierceness in his eyes though, they told me that I was wrong to think he’d been pulling away from me. It was obvious now he wanted me to discover on my own that I couldn’t leave him, rather than signing up for the possibility of my resenting him for putting pressure on me. Part of me wished that he would, his strongly voiced desires would make it easier to make the decision one way or the other.

“There’s a marina on the other side that rents paddle boats,” he explained, not fazed at all that I hadn’t said a single word to him since he’d returned. “Wanna put on some sun block and hit the water?” he proposed, a boyish glint taking over the determination in his amber stare.

“Yeah,” I whispered as I took the proffered bottle of sun block from his hand to coat my face.

“Good,” he nodded and stole the bottle back to help me slather the smelly lotion over my shoulders. I loved that he wanted to protect me from anything the elements threw at me. Having naturally red hair didn’t make me the best candidate for prolonged time in the sun, but I was the type of ginger affectionately referred to as a ‘day walker,’ meaning I was able to spend an hour in direct sunlight with being burnt to a crisp. However, I knew that with all the time I’d spent outside this week, I shouldn’t push it.

Although, I never felt like the word ‘ginger’ applied to me. My hair was more a brassy red-brown and I had very few freckles. I always thought gingers had more of the carrot, strawberry or peachy color to their hair and more than a handful of what my mom used to dub ‘angel kisses.’ That distinction never stopped my co-workers or school friends for referring to me with the moniker, even though it applied to Britton more than to me. Either way, I liked the healthy tint of my skin and didn’t want to turn into a tomato on our last day.

After we were both sufficiently sun protected, he grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the truck. “Let’s go see what kind of trouble we can find on the lake, sweetheart,” he said with a wink and a grin that had my heart melting just a little bit more. I thought I wanted him to make the decision easier on me, but what I didn’t anticipate was that he’d be able to do that without uttering a single promise or another desperate word.

Ryan

I watched the sun dance over Carrie’s copper locks as we peddled our boat through the marina area of the lake toward the pedestrian bridge, then around toward the other inlet areas, exploring the shore. I’d picked up a light snack at the park’s convenience store and my eyes were peeled for a very secluded place for the two of us to spend some quality time together while enjoying said snack. I’d spent the entire trip trying to feed Carrie at every available opportunity. She was so skinny that it had to be unhealthy. Aside from her tank tops, her clothes were incredibly baggy on her, like she would disappear in them if she could. She didn’t believe that she could have curves, saying that her sister had gotten the body, but the generous handful of tits she had showed me that all she needed was a little meat. I was more than happy to assist with that, even though she was already sexy as hell.

The last few days had been nothing short of a fucking dream. Falling asleep beside her after hours spent reminding her of how beautiful she was to me. Mornings waking up with her in my arms, that brassy colored hair spilling out over the empty pillow behind her, while she murmured incoherent pleas against my chest. She hadn’t had another night terror since Jerome. I only hoped that it was my presence that helped calm her enough to get the rest she deserved.

A well-rested Carrie was almost a completely different person. She smiled constantly and the bruises under her eyes were almost entirely gone. I knew enough about what I’d seen over the last week to understand that she was suffering from some kind of post-traumatic stress disorder. What she’d shared about her mother’s death had been nightmare enough to relieve it in her sleep, but I knew there was more to the horror that was her everyday life than she was telling me. Her mother’s death alone would not be the reason she was so desperate to leave her home behind and venture off to parts unknown to start over.

I wanted her to tell me everything, but at the same time, I was scared of what she might reveal. From the way her eyes were haunted, I knew whatever she’d lived through would’ve been enough to destroy most people. Every day, I could see the small amount of her that wanted to spill her guts to me grow just a little more. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust me with her secrets. No, I knew she didn’t trust me to stick around once it was all out in the open. No matter what though, I was here. I wasn’t going anywhere.

It took everything I had inside me to keep my promise to her about begging her to stay. I wanted to fix everything and show her running wasn’t the answer. Though, my believing that made me the world’s biggest hypocrite. I’d done the same thing, hadn’t I? I’d run from my life and ended up with something so much better than I’d ever imagined. Who’s to say she wouldn’t find the same? That I wasn’t the slice of heaven she was to me?

After paddling toward a small alcove that looked to be mostly deserted, we found a place to tie off the boat and walked onto the shore. The high grass lent the perfect place for our snack, as it shielded us completely from boats still on the water, as well as any nearby campsites. Spreading the sleeping bag I’d brought with us on the ground like a blanket among the weeds, I gestured for her to take a seat beside me as I opened up our bag of treats.

“Everything looks so good,” she said, eying the bottle of water I pulled out last before balling up the plastic bag and setting it under me so that we’d have something to haul our trash out in.

“I’m glad you approve,” I told her, as I opened a container of cubed watermelon. All I could think about when I’d picked it up was feeding it to her, one piece at a time. I wanted to watch her take it between her pink little lips, a drop of juice escaping to run down her chin, inviting me to lick its trail.

“Open,” I commanded plucking a piece of fruit between my fingers and scooting closer to make my fantasy come true.

“You first,” she whispered, mirroring my movements.

“Same time?” I asked, staring into her sparkling green eyes which were darkened with desire.

“One,” she enunciated, drawing my focus to her mouth for a split second before returning my gaze to her eyes.

“Two,” I brought my piece of fruit closer to her lips and she moved hers to rest on my bottom lip before uttering the word we’d both been waiting for, “three,” she croaked out just before I slipped the cube into her open mouth, her tongue snaking out to collect it as I did the same.

After taking a few seconds to chew and swallow the sweet cube, we lunged at each other, my hand grabbing her under her chin and pulling her eager lips to mine. The syrupy nectar coated her mouth, as I’m sure it did mine as well, as we licked and savored our connection. Soon, hands began to wander, hers to the button of my shorts and mine underneath the tight green tank top she’d put on that morning. Her stomach muscle contracted as my fingers played with her ribs. The feel of skin on skin was always incredible when it came to her.

I choked back a groan as her little hand slid into my shorts and grasped at my erection. Her hand was anything but timid as she started to jerk me under my shorts.

“Shit,” I hissed, trying not to thrust into her or push her back to the blanket and ride her until she screamed. That would come, but I didn’t want her to associate our time together with the men who’d obviously cared very little for her pleasure in the past. Breaking our kiss for a moment, I took a second to scan the area to make sure we were still alone. After confirming what I already knew, I carefully rolled her tank above her breasts and yanked down the cups of her bra until I had unfettered access to her delicious nipples. Guiding her back to the ground, I plucked another cube of watermelon from the container and put it between my fingers.

“I don’t have ice for this, so we have to make do,” I shrugged apologetically and traced her areola with the pink fruit, following it closely with my tongue. The whimper she released and the involuntary buck of her hips told me that I was on the right track. I mimicked the action on her left breast before offering her the fruit. Not breaking eye contact with me, she opened her mouth and took the watermelon, moaning as she devoured it.

Next, I grabbed the bottle of water, still cold from its time in the cooler section of the store. Starting at her belly button, I traced a path with the heel of the bottle to the valley between her breasts, before circling her nipples again. By the time I finished, I was pretty sure they could cut glass. Putting the bottle sideways on her chest, so that it could hit both nipples at the same time, I grabbed her hand and brought it up to hold it in place.

“Keep it there,” I coached before I flicked open the button on her short white linen shorts. The cuffs on the legs were so damned adorable that I’d almost foregone this part of the trip to keep her in Benson for another day, but being here in this moment, I was glad we’d left our room. Dragging her shorts down her legs and onto the sleeping bag beneath us, I kissed her sandal clad ankle. “Fuck, you look incredible like this,” I told her, taking a moment to savor her in that position. She was sprawled onto the blanket, pale legs bent and slightly spread, giving me just a peek at her powder blue cotton panties. Her stomach was pulling in excited breaths as she held the cold bottle to her breasts, her green tank under her arms pits and her red hair flowing like a river above her. She looked like a fucking goddess. “My goddess,” I breathed, before pulling a condom from my back pocket and setting it beside her hip.