shaede assassin 05 - shadows at midnight (20 page)

“I told you,” Ty said. “This has nothing to do with your Darian. This is about the Synod wanting to control me.”

“If I’m being visited by the Synod’s hitman, I think we can safely say this does, in fact, have something to do with me. It picked me up and tossed me around like a ragdoll, Ty. And somehow, I don’t think that ignoring it would have kept it from throwing me against a wall.”

His brow puckered as absorbed my words. “Are you hurt?”

“That’s not the point!” Jesus, what in the hell was
wrong
with him? “What is
Nys’Asdar
?” 

Tyler averted his gaze. “It’s not important.”

“The hell it isn’t! It’s what all of this is really about!”

“This is about power, Darian, plain and simple. This is about me reclaiming a part of myself that the Synod took.”

“Is any of this in retaliation for what they did to Adira?”

Ty’s gaze locked with mine and his expression darkened with his anger. I swallowed down the fear that rose in my throat and knocked my chin up a notch. I was tired of being in the dark. I knew that Ty wanted me to have faith in him. To trust him. And I did. But this had gone too far. With all of the Synod’s threats looming above us, we needed to face them as a united front.

“Well?” I asked. “Is it?”

I didn’t know much about Adira’s story. She’d bound herself to Kade, the piece of shit Cambion who’d damned near killed me almost a year ago. His ability to siphon Adira’s power had violated all sorts of Jinn rules and the last time I’d seen her, she told me that she’d been called before the Synod to face their judgment for violating their rules. Tyler had cared for her. Had maybe even loved her once. He’d considered her a victim of Kade’s ambitions and for all I knew that was probably the case. The Synod had apparently disagreed, though. And knowing Ty, he hadn’t taken whatever her punishment had been well.

“Have you thought about what it truly means to be omnipotent, Darian?” Ty’s tone was too calm, too level for my peace of mind. “There are no limits, only endless possibilities.”

I had to admit, the concept was frightening. Unchecked power was a dangerous thing, especially when in the wrong hands. The thought of Tyler possessing that sort of power scared me. Not because I thought he’d abuse it. At least, not intentionally. But he’d defy the natural order to protect the ones he loved. Of that I had no doubt.

“It’s a concept I can’t even fathom,” I replied after a moment. “I can’t begin to wrap my mind around what it means.”

“Gods aren’t meant to walk with men,” Ty said absently.

“Are you trying to tell me that you’re a god, Tyler?”

“I’m trying to tell you that I’ve got this under control, Darian. I know you want to be in the thick of it, but I’m keeping you out of the loop to protect you.”

The way he refused to answer any of my questions maddened me. “You said yourself that there might be a time when you can no longer protect me. Seems to me like that time has come, but I won’t have a chance of protecting myself if I don’t know what in the hell is going on.”

God, I was exhausted. So tired of the damned fight. I’d survived the frying pan of Padma’s vengeful torture only to be tossed into the flames of the Synod’s indignation. Tyler’s silence only made matters worse. One visit from the
Délash
was enough. I didn’t want to see what happened during a second—or even third—encounter. Not even a pair of bloodthirsty sentient daggers would be a match for incorporeal sentient magic. If Tyler couldn’t protect me, then who could? He might have been ready to go toe-to-toe with the Synod, but I wasn’t sure that I was up to snuff.

“I’m always with you, Darian,” Ty said somberly. “Always.”

His cryptic non-response tipped my temper of the edge. “What in the hell does that even
mean
?” It pissed me off to no end that I had to keep asking him that. “Do you mean this?” I thrust my left fist toward his face, thumb pointing out. “Padma tried to take it from me,” I said. “She tried to cut my fucking thumb off to get it. She sensed the power in it and she beat me fucking bloody when she couldn’t have it.”

 Ty’s jaw squared and he looked away as though he couldn’t bear to think of what had happened to me there. Still, he refused to give me a straight answer. “You were protected—as much as I could offer—even though I wasn’t there.”

“Why do you have to be so damned cryptic? Don’t you think I can deal with the truth? I’ve proven I can handle a hell of a lot more than you’re giving me credit for.”

“That’s not it and you know it, Darian.”

“Do I?” I couldn’t do anything to keep the disdain from my tone. “How were you able to use your magic in the labyrinth?” We wouldn’t have made it to Xander without the things Tyler had done down there, and even so, I sensed that he’d been holding back what he’d really been capable of. “How was I able to use my ring to defend myself when Xander jumped me? Those words you made me say… They did something. Awakened something, didn’t they? What it is, Tyler? What in the hell is this thing that I can’t even take off my thumb if I tried?”

Tyler reached out and encircled my left wrist in his strong grip. He hauled me against him and held me tight as he brought his mouth close to my ear. “Our bond is different,” he said in a murmur. “Special. I knew it would be the second you put your hand in mine. It transcends any stupid rules, time, or space. It’s unbreakable, Darian. Just like my love for you. It’s bigger than us. And stronger that any magic—any living thing—that might think to come between us.”

My heart swelled with emotion. I felt the same way. What Ty and I had was more than love. It was all-encompassing and fathomless. I’d known it in my soul long before I admitted it to myself. Maybe from that very first touch. But in the greater scope of things, what did it matter? It wouldn’t sway the Synod’s opinion. It wouldn’t change the course of action they’d chosen to take.

Tyler’s mouth met my neck and I shivered. He kissed a path along my throat, across my jawline to the corner of my lips. His hand reached back to cup the back of my neck and I melted into his embrace. He lips met mine slowly. Softly. His mouth seeking permission before he deepened the kiss. My hands moved of their own accord as my fingers dove into the strands of his hair. He wrapped one arm around my waist and held me tight as his slanted his mouth across mine and thrust this tongue against mine with an urgency that I knew all too well.

All-consuming. The flames of our passion burned like the sun, as unquenchable as our love.

I couldn’t get enough of his scent, his taste, the security I felt just being held in his embrace. He kissed me as though he were starved for the contact, as though he couldn’t hold me close enough, couldn’t taste me deep enough. I felt his desperation in every kiss, the way he kneaded the flesh at my hip with his strong fingers. In his breath that passed from him, through me, with every meeting of our mouths. I wanted to lose myself to him. To forget everything and simply let the world melt away as only he could do. I wanted to exist in that place where nothing else mattered but me and him and this moment that spread out infinitely before us…

“Stop.” I pushed away from him, my breath sawing in and out of my chest. Jesus. How could I have been so stupid? “Do you really think you can distract me like that? Just kiss me and magically make all of my questions go away?”

“Depends,” Ty said without an ounce of shame. “Was it working?”

I wanted to kick him in the shin for the smug expression on his gorgeous face. “You know it was. How could you do that, Ty?” He knew how Azriel had used affection to manipulate me. “Goddamn it.”

He scrubbed a hand over his face and had the decency to look ashamed. “You’re right. I’m out of line. It’s been a long fucking day and I think we both need some rest. I need to wrap a few things up with Levi. I’ll be back later, okay?”

I turned away, unwilling to meet his gaze. “Fine. Whatever.” It’s not like my opinion mattered. No matter what I said, Ty wasn’t going to allow our conversation to continue.

“I love you, Darian.”

Damn him. The honesty in those words gutted me. “I love you, too.”

When I turned to face him, he was gone.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

“Darian, I know you think that staying away is best, but we need you over here.”

Asher’s tone was grave, not a trace of his usual snark. I pulled my cell away from my ear and let out a sigh. It had been a week since we’d brought Xander back and I’d hoped that without me around, he could get his head on straight. That maybe I could prove to Tyler that my relationship with him, Raif, and the others wasn’t quite as dysfunctional and co-dependent as he made it out to be. Guess that plan wasn’t working so well.

I brought the phone back to my ear. “I told Anya—”

“Yeah, she’s the one who told me to call you,” Asher said. “She’s not getting through to him.”

Goddamn it. I’d counted on her to set Xander straight. Maybe he was farther gone than I’d thought. It’s not like I couldn’t use the distraction. Ever since our fight, there’d been a palpable tension between Tyler and I that put me on edge. He hadn’t answered enough of my questions to put me at ease and he knew that I was pissed off about being kept in the dark. Likewise, I doubted that the Synod had left the city after their little chat with Ty, which meant that I’d have to watch my back for a while longer. I wasn’t thrilled at the prospect of another visit from the
Délash
either. Hell, just seeing the sky cloud over made me anxious these days. I needed a distraction from the things I couldn’t change.

Maybe what I needed was to focus on something I could control.

“I’m on my way.”

I ended the call and set my phone on the bar. Ty looked up from his scrambled eggs. “I’m actually surprised you lasted an entire week without going over there.”

Someone was still a crankypants. I didn’t want to fight with Tyler anymore. I wanted us to move past this so we could come together as a united front. True, I had no idea what we were uniting against, but still. I truly believed that we could overcome anything as long as we were together. We’d lost so much time over the past year. I didn’t want to miss out on any more.

I let out a long sigh. “Look, we could both use a time-out. From the sound of it, Raif and Ash are both at the end of their ropes. I owe it to them to do what I can to help.”

“You don’t owe any of them anything,” Tyler replied. He shoved his plate of eggs away. “They dragged you into
their
lives. Not the other way around.”

A second fight was coming and I didn’t have it in me to go another round. Ty obviously didn’t want me anywhere near Xander despite the fact that there was nothing between us. “Are you ever going to tell me what happened between the two of you down in Padma’s labyrinth?”

Ty kept his gaze focused straight ahead. “Not today, Darian.”

Yeah, it was time for me to get the hell out of my apartment before I throttled Tyler. I tried not to hold his shitty attitude against him. He was dealing with a metric fuck ton of stress and no matter how much he pretended not to be concerned by the Synod’s presence in Seattle, I knew it had him rattled.

Patience wasn’t one of my virtues, but I was working on it. I wanted answers, full disclosure. But I couldn’t push Ty. If I did, it would make me even more of a hypocrite than I already was. We’d hash everything out when he was ready. I had to believe that. And fighting about it wasn’t going to convince him to open up to me any damn faster.

“I’ll be back in a few hours.” I took my cereal bowl to the sink and filled it with water. Tyler’s gaze slid to the side as he watched me and the stern set of his jaw relaxed a fraction of an inch. “What’s on your agenda for today?”

Resignation eased the tension in his shoulders as Ty turned to face me. “I’m meeting with a couple of potential clients. I should probably find Merrick and talk to him at some point today, too.”

“If you need me for anything, call,” I said. “I’ll drop whatever I’m doing in a heartbeat if you need me.” I wanted Tyler to know that he was unequivocally my priority. Nothing mattered to me more than him. Not Raif, Asher, or the entire Shaede population. 

His expression softened and he pushed up from the barstool and crossed the room toward me. His hazel gaze burned as it locked with mine and he didn’t come to a stop until our bodies touched. “Truce?”

I smiled. “Absolutely.”

He leaned in and put his mouth to mine. The kiss was full of heat and intensity, his lips slanting as his tongue coaxed mine to give way. His arms encircled me and his fingers dove into my hair at the nape of my neck, twining through the strands as he held me tight. The urgency of his kisses ignited a burst of heat in my belly and sent a trickle of fear through my bloodstream at the same time. I didn’t pull away. I kissed him back with every ounce of emotion I felt for him. Tyler was like the universe he’d so easily held in his palm and I was nothing more than a helpless planet caught in his orbit.

I loved him.

When Ty finally pulled away, I was breathless and flushed. A very arrogant, very male smile spread across his lips. “A little something to remind you of what you have to come home to today.”

As if I needed the reminder. Not that his show of affection wasn’t
incredibly
appreciated. My toes curled in my boots and my lips throbbed as the heat of his kisses dulled to a warm glow in the center of my being. Ty smoothed the hair away from my face, his gaze searching mine.

“If you run into any trouble today, hold out your left hand.”

I assumed by
trouble
, he meant, if you run into any black, menacing clouds with red eyes today. I didn’t exactly appreciate his continued need to be cryptic, but I got the gist. Wonder Woman had her gold, bullet deflecting cuffs, I had a silver ring.

“That’s it, huh?” I raised a dubious brow. “Just lift my hand up and poof!”

Tyler kissed me once, just a peck. “I’ll see you this afternoon.”

I pursed my lips, pinned him with an accusing stare. “Uh huh.” I leaned in and kissed him back before I let my body fade into the light.