Sheet Music - A Rock 'n' Roll Love Story (64 page)

“What’s so funny?” she asked, instantly taking a defensive stance.

“I’m surprised you didn’t ask about the scar on my head,” he smirked.

“I figured it was none of my business,” she sniffed.

“I did this to myself the night before Bull signed me into rehab,” he stated, looking her directly in the eye.  “It was after the award show.  Bull found one of your new CD’s and gave it to me.  I went back to my hotel room, listened to it, and went berserk, totally tore the room apart.  Furniture in pieces, broken glass, you name it.  I must have cut my head on the glass.  When Bull found me, I was covered in blood but I don’t remember a thing.  Not one of my proudest moments.”

Annie’s eyes fell.  “The CD wasn’t all that bad, Michael,” she spoke softly.

Michael quickly reached out and touched her arm.  “Annie, I didn't say it
was
bad.  In fact, I thought it was great.  But the lyrics destroyed me because I knew a lot of the hostility and pain you wrote about involved me.  It was a real eye-opener to what I had done to you, but I've never been more proud of your talent.”

His lips curled into a brilliant smile.  “And the cover art…”

“What about it?”

Michael rubbed at his chin.  “It blew me away.”

Annie smiled and began to shift uneasily in her seat.  “Well, I guess I’ll get supper started while the girls are still sleeping.”

As she stood to leave, Michael caught her hand and gently pulled her to a stop.

“Thanks, Annie.”

“For what?”

“For talking to me as a human being and not the man you hate for the sheer fact I’m breathing the same air as you.”  To his surprise, she didn’t remove her hand from his.

“Michael, I may never get to the point where I can enjoy being in the same room as you.  But, no matter how I may feel about you in the years to come, the fact still remains: you are the father of my children.  And with that illustrious title comes a certain amount of respect.”

He nodded in agreement.  Then his eyes dropped to their clasped hands and he watched as her tiny hand slid from his fingers.  In the blink of an eye, the warmth of her touch was gone.

The days passed slowly.  For every inch Michael felt he’d gained on winning back his family, Annie pushed him back a mile.  She was determined to keep him at arm’s length.  Her pride wouldn’t allow anything more.  They continued to play the same painful game, each insistent to be the winner, but neither being sure of the prize or the cost attached to achieving it.

After another long day of attempted congeniality, Annie tucked Angel into her crib for an afternoon nap and doubled-checked on Sammi before returning to the living room.  Michael was kneeling next to the couch gathering the scattered toys and putting them into the wooden toy box beside the fireplace.  Silently, she joined him in the task.

“What time is it?” he asked, tossing the last toy into the box.

“You don’t have to stay, Michael, if that’s what you’re thinking.  They’ll be asleep for a while.”

“It’s okay.  I don’t mind.  Besides, I promised Sammi we’d go into town later for ice cream.”

Annie sighed with distress.  “Sammi it too young to care about getting ice cream.  So, why don't you tell me why you're
really
here?”

He glanced at her with curiosity.  “To spend time with my kids.”

That can’t be the only reason, because you and I both know all it would take is one quick phone call to our lawyers and a visitation schedule could be agreed to this very afternoon.  You could be seeing the girl’s at your own place instead of wasting your days here.”

Michael slid onto the couch and rubbed the fatigue from his face.  “What are you trying to say, Annie?  Are you uncomfortable having me around so much?”

“To be brutally honest, yes, I am.”

“Then I’m sorry.  That wasn’t my intention.  I was only doing it this way to make it easier on the kids since this is the only house they’ve ever known.”

“Yes, I’ll give you that.  But I’m also sensing there is more to your reasoning than what you just said.”

He gazed at her thoughtfully, his eyes reflecting a mournful sense that made her heart lurch.  Then he bent forward, resting his elbows against his firm thighs, with his hands pressed together as if he were praying.

“Okay, if
I
can be brutally honest, I'm here because I also wanted to spend time with you.  I miss being with you.”

She cringed when she heard his words and shrunk back against the toy box.  “I was afraid you might say something like that.”

“Why?  Does it upset you to think I’d still want to spend time with you?”

“Yes.”

“Can I ask why?”

Annie leaned forward, obviously agitated by his comments.  “Because we’re divorced!  This can’t be healthy for either of us.”

“Would you like me to leave?” he asked defensively, and stood as if to depart.

She shook her head.  “No, that isn’t the point.  All I’m trying to say is, it’s been very difficult for me to re-establish a life without you, and somehow I manged to do just that.  I’m in a good place now.  The girls are happy and we’re surviving.  Then, all of a sudden, Daddy strolls back into our lives and everything is supposed to be okay?  I can’t pretend, and I refuse to sweep our divorce under the rug as if it never happened.”

“I’m not asking you to do that and I don’t expect you to pretend!”  He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed.  “Maybe it sounds crazy, but I was hoping we might find some way to be friends again.”  He forced a weak smile to his lips and shrugged in defeat.  “That’s all I was looking for, Annie.  No games and no hidden agendas.  In the long run, I think that’s best for the kids.  Wouldn’t you agree?”

“Of course I’d agree.  But, what I’m saying is, I’m not sure I’m strong enough to be your ‘friend’.  I left for a very specific reason, Michael, and when I did, I pushed you out of my heart and my head.  I’m not sure I want you taking up space in either place again.”

He tipped his head back against the couch.  She could tell by the painful look on his face, every word she spoke was like another stab to his heart.  There was a day, when she thought this action would have brought her relief and happiness watching him squirm in agony.  But now, the reality of seeing it brought her nothing but more despair.

“Please, don’t keep the kids from me,” he said, his voice cracking with emotion, as he stared blankly at the ceiling.

“I have no intention of doing that, as long as you stay sober.  The girls deserve a father, and for better or worse, you are it.”

He lifted his head to meet her gaze.  Emotion made his eyes glisten.  “I understand why you feel the way you do toward me and I wish beyond reason I could change that.  I'm thinking now, that's probably never going to happen.  But I
need
the kids in my life, Annie.  They're the only thing I've got left, and the reason I still have my sanity.  While I was in rehab, all I could think about was getting clean and seeing the girls
and
you again.  Now that I'm out, I'm realizing the fight I have on my hands to prove myself all over again to them, and to you.”

He stood and sauntered over to the window with his hands dug deeply into the pockets of his jeans.  “You know, I’ve never had to fight for anything or anyone in my personal life before and I’m not afraid of the challenge associated with that.  It will only make the victory more meaningful when it happens.”

He reached for the doorknob to the deck door.  Then, as he began to turn it in his hand, he faced her.  “I’m going for a walk.  Maybe when I get back, the girls will be awake and we can go for that ice cream.”

As soon as she heard the door click tight, Annie began to cry.  Annie could sense that his emotion hung heavily around his neck like an iron cross.  His heart adorned his sleeve.  He seemed so genuine and likable, it made hating him all the harder, but still she did.  Even smelling the subtlety of his cologne lingering in the room after his departure angered her.  It was cruel of him to be around, torturing her with the smoothness of his voice and smile.

She moved to the window to find him.  He was standing at the water’s edge, his long hair blowing across the tops of his shoulders as he skipped stones over the white caps.  The memory of the day he had taught her to do the same trick danced into her brain.  She shook the thought from her head and padded into the kitchen for a glass of water.  It was so much easier to hate him when he wasn’t around, she thought.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

When the girls finally woke, Annie went to the deck and called to Michael.  A few minutes later, he was preparing them for the trip into town.

“Why don’t you come with us?” he asked for a second time, as he adjusted the diaper bag over his shoulder.

And for a second time, she shook her head.

Michael reached for the baby and placed her into his lap.  “It's just ice cream, Annie.  No strings attached or implied with it, I promise,” he teased, trying to make light of the situation.  Then Sammi began to tug on her mother's leg.  “That's two against one,” he laughed.  “Now you
have
to come with us.”

Annie rolled her eyes and groaned in protest.  “Okay, fine.  I’ll go.”

He made small talk as they drove the back roads into the town of Vineyard Haven, and Annie half listened.  He was making it seem too normal, as if no bitterness remained between them, and it disturbed her.  In town, she maintained a cool distance from him and ignored the subtle glances he kept directing her way.  After getting their ice cream, Michael pushed the carriage down toward the ferry dock in time to show Sammi a large passenger vessel gliding into a nearby slip.

A few over-zealous tourists noticed Michael and he obliged them with a quick autograph.  Annie made sure to keep the girls safely out of view and turned her back anytime she saw a camera aimed in their direction.  For once, she was grateful the focus was on him and not her, as they slowly made their way back up toward Main Street.

Michael settled Sammi into the backseat of the Land Rover first, while Annie waited on the sidewalk with Angel cradled in her arms.  Finger by tiny finger, he carefully wiped the stickiness from Sammi’s skin, then secured her safety seat.  He was at the back of the vehicle, loading the baby stroller, when he heard Annie let out a startled squeal of fright.  Instantly, the flash back of her attack by the disgruntled stage hand seared through his brain.  Reacting quickly, he darted around the side of the truck prepared to defend her if necessary.

“Hey!” Michael yelled, with a fearless tone in his voice.  Assessing the situation, he was alarmed to see a blond-headed man with his arms tightly encircling Annie and the baby, and his face pressed into her neck.  Two long strides and he was beside the man.  “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he asked.  The man suddenly released his grip on Annie and she spun to face him.

“It’s okay, Michael.  This is Jay Preston,” she introduced.  “He’s a…friend of mine,” she answered awkwardly.

Jay stuck out his hand and shook Michael’s.  “Hi, Mike.  How are you doing?”

“Fine,” he answered, his voice still tight and defensive.

“I was sorry to hear about Brian,” Jay added.

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Jay is the bass player for the James Fellowship Band,” Annie explained.

Michael nodded.  “I thought your name sounded familiar,” he exhaled, relaxing a bit.  “How is Jimmy these days?  I haven’t seen him in years.”

“You know James?” Annie asked, unnerved by the fact one of Jay’s arms remained around her waist and the heated glare Michael was shooting at both of them.

Michael took the baby from Annie’s arms in preparation to get her into the Land Rover.  “Yeah, we go way back,” he replied, turning his eyes away from them.

When Michael’s body disappeared into the backseat of the vehicle, Jay turned his attention to Annie.

“I thought you said he was no longer in your life?” Jay inquired in a whispered tone.

“He isn’t!”

“Then why is he here?”

“Jay, they’re his kids too, you know, and he has a right to see them,” she answered, a bit more defensively than she probably should have.

“Maybe so, but seeing you together like this makes it appear as if it’s something more than what you’re saying.”

Annie shot him an angry scowl.  “I don’t want to discuss this here.”

Michael finished buckling Angel into her car seat and then returned to Annie’s side in a territorial gesture that rattled her nerves.  “Can you give us a minute, please?” she asked him.

“Fine.  I’ll be in the truck,” he answered flatly through tight lips.

“I’ll see you later, Mike,” Jay added.

Michael tossed a courtesy wave over his shoulder at Jay and climbed into the driver’s side of Annie’s truck.

“How long has he been here?” Jay asked gliding his hands up Annie’s arms.

“Seems like forever,” Annie replied, rolling her eyes.

“I guess that explains why you haven’t been returning my calls.”

Annie smiled and reached out and stroked the side of his face, knowing without a doubt that Michael was watching every move she made.  “A day hasn’t gone by that I haven’t thought about calling you,” she lied graciously.

“He’s not staying at your place, is he?”

“Hell no.  He’s renting a house somewhere on the island.”

Jay squeezed her hand.  His blue eyes sparkling with excitement.  “Are you free tonight?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Why?  Don’t tell me you have plans with him?” he asked, gesturing toward the truck.

“No!  Don’t be crazy.  I’m not sure if I can get a babysitter.  I’ll give the neighbors a call though.  Their granddaughter is visiting them for the summer.  Last I heard, she was looking for summer jobs.”

“Great.  See what you can do and call me.”

“I will.”

Jay pulled her against his body.  Her fingers slid quickly around his neck and connected in the back.  Then their lips met.  It was short and sweet, but she knew it was enough to push Michael over the edge.