Shooting Star (9 page)

“I know he doesn’t think he has the capacity to love or be loved.”

“Do you believe that?”
Brac
asked.

“Doesn’t matter what I believe. It’s what Jessup believes that matters,” Priest shot back.

Brac
bit his bottom lip, trying to work up the nerve to ask the question he’d been dying to know the answer to since he’d first heard Jessup mention Priest. “Do you love him?”

Priest’s eyebrows shot up. “You’re a nosy little bastard, aren’t
ya
?”

“I answered your questions, now it’s your turn to answer mine,”
Brac
boldly stated.

“I’m here, aren’t I? If you had any idea how hard it was to get away or how long I’ve travelled to get here, you wouldn’t be asking.”

“So the answer is yes, you
do
love him.”
Brac
felt his hopes of building a future with Jessup beginning to crumble.

“I’m not in love with him, but he’s the closest thing to a friend I have. We’ve known each other a long time.”

“So how can you know him the way you claim to and not be in love with him? There are so many things about Jessup to love. I started falling the first week.”

“Maybe we’re not talking about the same man. I mean, don’t get me wrong, but other than his body and unwavering loyalty, I’m not sure what else there is to Jessup.”

Brac
slammed his beer on the table, offended on Jessup’s behalf. “You’re an asshole. I can’t believe Jessup considers you his best friend.”
Brac
stood and stormed out of the room. By the time he reached the stairs leading to his room, Priest’s laughter began to echo through the house once more.
“Bastard.”

* * * *

The smells wafting from the kitchen into the bedroom began to gnaw at
Brac’s
empty stomach. “Damn him.”

Knowing he couldn’t spend the next three days hiding,
Brac
left the bedroom and stomped down the steps. He entered the kitchen and found a grinning Priest at the table.

“I was hoping you’d join me for dinner.” Priest stood and retrieved a platter of grilled chicken and roasted vegetables from the warming oven. “Have a seat.
Unless, of course, you’d rather take your plate upstairs.”

“This is fine,”
Brac
growled, pulling out a chair.

Priest set two glasses and a pitcher of ice water on the table before joining
Brac
at the table. He filled his plate and poured his water before saying anything further. “Tell me what you see in Jessup?”

“Evidently
a hell of a lot more than you do
,”
Brac
grumbled.

“Such as?”

“He pretends to be grumpy, but I think he uses that as a shield to keep people away. However, if you catch him first thing in the morning, when his face is still plastered with sheet wrinkles, he’s extremely kind. It’s like the mask he usually wears hasn’t had time to slip into place. It’s those moments I look forward to each day.”

“Is there more?”

“Sure. If you walk in on him reading the cartoon section of the newspaper you’re more than likely going to catch him smiling. That is, of course, until he catches you watching him.”
Brac
popped a roasted potato slice into his mouth. He’d have moaned at the taste if he hadn’t been trying so hard to show Priest no reaction to the prepared food.

“And…?” Priest prompted.

“Do you seriously need me to list everything there is to love about the man?”

“It’s your list, not mine,” Priest reminded him.

“He stayed out here to watch over me even though his job should’ve ended when the photographers and reporters gave up and left town.” He speared a carrot with his fork. “As a matter-of-fact, he took time off work those last couple of days. He didn’t have to do that. He did it because he was worried about me.”

“No, he did it because he wanted to fuck you and was trying to move past his demons enough to pounce,” Priest ground out between clenched jaws.

For the first time since they’d met,
Brac
detected a hint of jealousy in Priest’s voice. “And you don’t like the idea of him fucking me, is that it?”

Priest relaxed his expression and shrugged. “I don’t appreciate that a spoiled brat from California can make him hard when I couldn’t.” Priest dropped his fork onto his plate. “There, are you satisfied?”

Brac
sat back in his chair and crossed his arms. “First of all, I’m from Iowa, not California. And secondly, why do you care so much
who
he gets hard for if you’re not in love with him?”

“Because I’ve always been the one to take care of satisfying him.
Did you know that before he went to Syria he used to beg me to fuck him? Or that he refuses to sleep with anyone because he cries in his sleep?”

Brac
swallowed around the lump in his throat and shook his head. “He cried in his sleep
before
he went to prison?” Several times
Brac
thought he’d heard whimpering noises coming from Jessup’s room at night, but he’d assumed the man was reliving the torture he’d suffered.

“He might tell you he has nightmares, but it’s the crying that embarrasses him. The only way I know about them is because we’ve shared some close quarters while on assignment. He’s never once voluntarily spent the night with me though.”

“What makes him so sad?”
Brac’s
heart broke at the thought.

Priest took several bites of his chicken without answering
Brac’s
question.

“Are you afraid you’ll betray his trust if you tell me?”
Brac
asked.

“No,” Priest finally answered. “I know he was found in a cardboard box in a dumpster outside a fire station when he was only a few hours old, but that’s all he’s ever told me.” He glanced up from his plate. “It doesn’t pay to broadcast your weaknesses in our line of work.” Priest returned his attention back to his plate. “Whether it’s that or something else, I don’t know, but he’s convinced he’s not worthy of love.”

Brac
noticed the moisture gathering in Priest’s eyes. “You love him, don’t you?”

“I suppose I love him as much as I can love anyone. But don’t get your panties in a twist. I’m not looking for a partner. My life’s my own to destroy. Having someone count on me isn’t in my future.”

Going back to his dinner,
Brac
let silence settle around them. Despite Priest’s earlier comments about Jessup, he had a strong feeling Priest knew exactly why
Brac
had fallen so hard and fast for Jessup. Like it or not, Priest was about to get a run for his money if he thought he could scare
Brac
away from Jessup.

Chapter Six

Before turning the light off over his bed, Jessup grabbed the phone and the slip of paper with
Brac’s
new number on it.

“Hey,”
Brac
answered.
“Everything okay?”

“Yeah.
Bored out of my mind, so I thought I’d go ahead and try and get some sleep. Are you getting along with Priest any better?” He grinned. The satisfaction he felt after
Brac’s
complaining phone call earlier still sung in his veins.

“I guess,”
Brac
replied. “Hang on.”

Jessup heard
Brac
tell Priest he was going to take the call upstairs. The friendly pitch of
Brac’s
voice irritated him.

“Okay,”
Brac
said, getting back onto the phone. “We were watching a movie, but I’ve already seen it.”

“Priest’s watching a movie?” In all the years Jessup had known Priest, he’d never heard of the man sitting still long enough to watch a movie.

“
True Grit
, the new one, not the old one. Priest said he remembered seeing the original so he was interested in the remake. I tried to tell him it was good but not even Jeff Bridges could compare to John Wayne.”
Brac
chuckled. “I think Priest agrees because he’s done nothing but complain about not being able to understand a word Bridges says.”

Jessup rubbed his eye with the heel of his hand.
“Sounds to me like things are a lot better between the two of you.”

“Yeah,”
Brac
mumbled. “We had to set some ground rules, but since then we’ve been getting along okay.”

“What kind of ground rules?” Jessup started to sit up but the pain wouldn’t allow it. “Has he come on to you?”

Brac
laughed. “No, we agreed not to talk about you other than general information.”

“You were talking about me?” Jessup didn’t like the sound of that. Priest knew a lot of shit about him.

When
Brac
didn’t answer, Jessup began to wonder exactly what Priest had told him.
“
Brac
?”

“It seems neither of us is good at handling jealousy, so we’ve come to an understanding. He doesn’t talk about fucking you, and I won’t resort to trying to kill him in his sleep.”

Jessup couldn’t hold back his amusement. “It’s been
a long time since he’s fucked me so if he’s trying to tell you different, don’t
believe it.”

“Doesn’t matter to me if it was last month or twenty years ago,”
Brac
said, irritation in his voice. “Would you like to think about him fucking me?”

“No!” Jessup barked. Deep in the grip of the green-eyed monster, Jessup was tired of the test he’d set up for
Brac
. “Are you sure he hasn’t tried?”

“I may be a foot shorter than he is, but I’m still quite capable of saying no.”

“And have you?” Despite Priest’s intimidating size, he did have a way of charming a man that was uncanny. Never, in all the years he’d known Priest, had he ever seen the man get turned down.

“Is there a point to this?”
Brac
asked. “Lesson one, don’t assume everyone cheats.”

“Wouldn’t really be cheating since we’ve never fucked,” Jessup reminded
Brac
.

“Maybe in whatever fucked up rule book
you
follow. But in
my
book, if you really like someone and
wanna
build something with them, you don’t go around fucking other guys. Of course I’m just a flake from Malibu so what would I know.”

Jessup wanted to follow up on that build something comment, but decided to let it drop. He still wasn’t convinced it was possible. “Would it help if I told you I miss you?”

Brac
sighed into the phone. “Actually, that would help a lot.”

“Good.” Jessup decided to change the subject again before
Brac
started to ask questions. “So have you caught any fish lately?”

“I wish. I haven’t been out of this house since the shooting. I don’t suppose you would talk to Priest about that, would
ya
? Despite being a grown man, he seems to think my opinion doesn’t hold a lot of weight.”

Jessup settled back against his pillow. It sounded like
Brac
was trying to get along with Priest, but Priest was being his usual cantankerous self. “If I tell him it’s okay for you to fish, he’ll have to go with you.”

“Speaking of, anything on the guy who shot you?”

“Nothing.
Although, unfortunately, the papers have picked up the story.”

“Yeah, Hal called. Sorry about that. I know how much you value your privacy.”

“It’s not about privacy,
Brac
. I’ve pissed off a hell of a lot of people over the years, and I can think of more than one of them who would love nothing more than to see me dead. Thankfully, the reports didn’t mention me by name. They were all about the attempt on your life with a side note about your bodyguard being shot in the process.”

“My bodyguard.”
Brac
hummed. “I bet if they thought you were my boyfriend they would’ve dug up every bit of information on you they could find.”

“Then let’s not do anything to give the press that assumption,” Jessup was quick to say. The need for anonymity was just as much for
Brac’s
safety
as his own
. He hadn’t been kidding about people wanting to kill him. It was something he hadn’t considered when it had been just him. He was more than used to looking over his shoulder, but would he be willing to put someone else in the position to do the same?

“No, we couldn’t possibly act like a real couple, not that we even are,”
Brac
said in a sarcastic tone.

“Are you saying you’d rather I go somewhere else once they spring me from this place?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Good, because I’d rather be with you than back at my apartment alone.”

“Gee, thanks.”
Brac
huffed. “Get some sleep.”

Jessup hated hanging up with tension between the two of them, but hollow promises wouldn’t do either of them any good. “Ask Priest to bring you to the hospital tomorrow.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.
He’ll take the appropriate precautions, and I’d really like to see you.”

Brac
growled into the phone. “You’re one of the most infuriating men I’ve ever known. One minute you do everything you can to push me away, and then the next you say shit like that. Which is it, Jessup? You want me or not?”

“It’s not that cut and dried. Of course I want you. Who the hell wouldn’t? But
there’s
a lot of things to consider.”

“Such as?”

“Your job.
Not only do I refuse to live my life under the microscope that comes with dating a celebrity, but it’s suicide for someone like me and in turn, dangerous for you. That should be enough right there, but I come with a hell of a
lotta
baggage that even you may not be able to help me overcome.”

“Won’t know unless we try,”
Brac
pointed out.

“We can talk about it once I’m released. Pouring my heart out over the phone isn’t going to happen.” Jessup wasn’t even sure he’d be able to open up to
Brac
in person, but he had no doubt any sort of relationship between them would fail without it.