Since You've Been Gone (Welcome to Paradise) (15 page)

“I’m not sure yet. But when I went shopping with Charlotte and Lexie the other day, Lexie did mention that Cooper is looking to rent out his cabin. He moved into Lexie’s house in town last month.” To Mari’s delight, she’d also learned that Cooper’s cabin was about a mile east of Nate and Charlotte’s, which meant they’d be neighbors, but she didn’t voice her excitement because Austin was now staring at her unhappily.

“I don’t want to say goodbye to you,” he said thickly.

The pain that squeezed her heart was so strong it surprised her. She hadn’t realized just how much she’d come to care about him, but now, as she imagined saying goodbye, she didn’t feel as excited about Harriet’s offer.

She loved being with Austin. He was sweet and gruff and impulsive. Amazing in bed. And he could be so very tender when he dropped his guard and allowed himself to be vulnerable.

“I don’t want to say goodbye either,” she murmured.

“Then come with me,” he urged. “You weren’t intending on finding a job when you agreed to come to Paradise, so it’s not like you’re losing anything. We can go to Malaysia and help out, and then you can head back to Iowa in time for those job interviews at the end of July.” He swallowed. “We’ll have an entire month together.”

God, it sounded so damn tempting, and a part of her desperately wanted to say yes. But this job offer was an equally strong siren call, and her doubts about Austin’s motives refused to dissipate.

“Are you sure this isn’t about you running away again?” she asked quietly.

A dark cloud floated into his green eyes. “What do you mean?”

“We both know you haven’t been giving your mother one hundred percent. You’ve spent some time with her, sure, but you’re not letting her in. Not fully, anyway.”

He didn’t answer.

“I think a part of you is using this tsunami as an excuse to skip town. That way you won’t have to deal with all the awkwardness anymore.”

Looking frustrated, Austin gestured to the TV. “Look at those people, Mari. They need help.”

“Well, your mother needs
you
. Della
needs
you, Austin. If you leave now, all the progress you’ve made will disappear. You’ll just end up gone for months, the distance will grow, and then you’ll have to start all over again the next time you come home.”

“I already told my agent I’d go. He’s probably contacting publications as we speak.” His voice came out hoarse. “Right now, the only question is—will you come with me or not?”

A tornado of indecision spiraled inside her. She swept her gaze over Austin’s handsome face, the face she’d spent almost an entire month looking at. He’d finally shaved a few days, so his jaw was now smooth and clean-shaven, which made him appear younger. But his dark hair was still as scruffy as ever, one rogue lock falling across his forehead, the ends curling under his ears.

She really didn’t want him to go.

But could she seriously just hop on a plane and go with him?

She stayed quiet for several moments, then swallowed hard. “I need some time to think about it.”

Although disappointment flashed in his eyes, he didn’t push her. “I guess I can’t ask for more than that.” Breaking eye contact, he picked up the remote control and turned off the television, the horrific images on the screen disappearing into black. “Are you hungry? Charlotte said something about going to Betty’s diner for lunch.”

“I could eat, I guess.”

Austin stood up. “Cool. I’ll get Charlotte. Meet me in the car?”

“Sure.” She chewed on her lower lip, not at all focused on the idea of lunch. Her thoughts were already a million miles away.

Later that night, Austin slid into bed and tried not to jostle Mari, who was sound asleep. Her reddish hair was fanned across the light-blue pillow, her lips parted slightly as she drew in quiet, even breaths.

She wasn’t going to come with him.

He knew it without a shred of doubt, and the depressing thought caused his chest to tighten with regret.

Let’s stay in Paradise. Together.

Her words buzzed around in his head, loud and persistent. He wished it could be that easy. Just stay in Paradise with Mari. There. Sounded simple when it was phrased like that.

But the problem was, Paradise wasn’t some perfect little bubble where only the two of them existed. His family was here. His mother and Rice. His
parents
.

This last week had felt like an uphill climb that never seemed to end. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t seem to open up to Della. It was like there was an invisible barrier between them, one he couldn’t breach. The close relationship he’d once had with his mother seemed like a distant memory, and now when he was with her, everything felt so awkward and difficult. It just didn’t feel right.

In fact, being back in Paradise…that didn’t feel right either. A part of him truly wondered if maybe he just didn’t belong here anymore.

He remembered Mari talking about how she hadn’t fit in back in Des Moines, how she hadn’t seemed to belong, either. But ironically, she fit right in now. He hadn’t missed the bounce to her step as she explored Paradise, the happiness in her eyes when she spent time with Charlotte and Maddie. In the week she’d been here, she’d made friends, filled an entire sketchbook, even landed a job.

It suddenly occurred to him that he was a real ass for asking her to leave the first place she’d felt truly happy in.

A ragged breath squeezed out of his lungs as the realization sank in. He couldn’t take Mari with him to Malaysia. She needed to stay here. She
belonged
here, even if he didn’t.

“What’s that big heavy sigh for?” came her sleepy voice.

“Did I wake you?” he said gruffly.

She shifted under the covers and snuggled up to him. “Yeah, but I don’t mind. Where’d you go?”

“Just down to the kitchen to grab some water. I couldn’t sleep.”

Even in the darkness, he could see the concern in her big blue eyes. “Everything okay?” she asked.

Not really.

“Everything’s fine.”

“Good.” She moved closer, one warm hand grasping his chin and bringing his head down for a kiss.

The moment their lips met, a rush of desperation flooded his chest. He couldn’t believe how much he’d come to care about this woman, and in less than a month. Mari affected him like no other woman ever had. She was smart, funny, unbelievably caring. And she made him happier than he’d felt in a long, long time.

“I…” He broke the kiss and cleared his throat. “I think I’m falling for you.”

Surprise widened her eyes. “What?”

Rather than repeat himself, he kissed her again, a long, deep kiss that made her whimper against his lips. That streak of desperation returned, prompting him to roll over and cover her body with his. He moaned when their lower bodies made contact, rubbing his hardening cock against her warm mound.

“I need you,” he ground out.

Mari was already tugging on the waistband of his boxers. She freed his cock and wrapped her fingers around it, giving him a slow pump that made him shiver.

Groaning, Austin flung an arm in the direction of the nightstand and grabbed a condom. As he sheathed himself, Mari wiggled out of her PJ’s, revealing those perfect breasts that made his mouth water.

There was no foreplay, no more words exchanged. With one deep stroke, he buried himself inside her. The heat of her pussy surrounded his cock, her inner muscles clamped around him as if to trap him in place. His skin was on fire, heart beating fast against his ribcage in a sharp staccato.

And his pulse only raced even faster when Mari gazed up at him with those gorgeous blue eyes and murmured, “Make love to me.”

The whispered request sent pleasure shooting through him. He started to move, a slow, torturous rhythm that drew impatient little growls from Mari’s lips. As her hands clawed at the sheets, she hooked her legs around his waist and tried to bring him deeper.

With a chuckle, Austin indulged in a couple more languid thrusts, then began moving in earnest. When he reached between them to stimulate her clit, her hips shot off the bed and pleasure washed over her face.

Austin had learned to read her responses. He knew that when he applied more pleasure on her clit, she would start squirming. That when he moved his thumb in a circular motion over that swollen bud, she would cry out in delight. Sure enough, she did both, and the sexy responses made his cock go impossibly stiffer.

He moved faster, his hips thrusting and retreating, and when he felt that telltale tingle at the base of his spine, he knew he was close. But he waited, watching Mari’s glazed expression, refusing to let go until she did. And when she finally sucked in a breath and started to come, he was floored by how beautiful she looked.

With Mari writhing beneath him, he exploded like a firecracker, then went still as pulses of pleasure danced along his nerve endings. Christ, it was so good. It was always so damn good with her.

A while later, after they’d both recovered and Mari’s head was resting on his chest, she peered up at him with uncertain eyes. “I still haven’t made up my mind,” she whispered.

Yes you have.

Ignoring the ache in his chest, he threaded his fingers through her hair. “It’s okay, sweetheart.” He held her tighter, rubbing her bare shoulder with his palm. “C’mon, let’s get some sleep. We can figure it all out tomorrow.”

But deep down, he knew they had nothing to figure out. He already had Mari’s answer, and now there was only one thing left for him to do.

Chapter Eleven

When Mari woke up the next morning, Austin’s side of the bed was empty. The second she registered his absence, she got a queasy feeling in her stomach, though she wasn’t really sure why. He’d probably just woken up early and was downstairs eating breakfast. There was no reason for her belly to be churning and her palms to be this damp and—her thoughts died abruptly when she glimpsed the piece of paper resting ominously on Austin’s pillow.

Her heart started to pound, but not in a good way. Sitting up, she snatched the paper and quickly read Austin’s note.

Mari,

By the time you wake up, I’ll already be on my way to the airport.

We both know you need to take that job. You love Paradise. You belong here.

But me… I can’t be here right now. I don’t know if this place will ever feel like home to me again, but I’m glad it feels like home to you. I’m glad I met you. And I meant every word I said last night.

I’m catching an earlier flight—it leaves at 10:20 a.m. There’ll be a ticket waiting for you at the airline counter if you change your mind.

Love,

Austin

She read the note twice. Then a third time. And a fourth. But the multiple readings didn’t succeed in clearing the confusion that fogged her brain, or easing the unbearable ache in her chest.

He’d left.

She couldn’t believe it. Last night he’d told her he was falling for her, and this morning, poof, he was gone.

A multitude of emotions flooded her body. Anger. Sorrow. Disbelief. She blinked away the tears that welled up in her eyes and glanced at the alarm clock on the nightstand.

Eight thirty.

His flight was at ten twenty.

Swiping a hand over her damp eyes, she launched herself out of bed and hurried to the door. Maybe he hadn’t left yet. The airport was only thirty minutes away, so for all she knew, he was still in this house.

But the balloon of hope in her chest died with a
pop
when she burst into the kitchen a minute later and found Nate and Charlotte at the kitchen table. The pair was drinking coffee, wearing identical somber expressions.

“He already left,” Nate spoke up when she skidded through the doorway. His tone was hard and flat, revealing his precise thoughts on the matter. “Snuck out around seven without saying goodbye.”

Mari’s heart splintered in two. “He left me a note.”

“Yeah, he mentioned that in his message.” Nate’s mouth was set in an angry line. “He left me, Jake and Owen voicemails. You know, saying how he doesn’t belong here and how the tsunami victims need him a lot more than we do. That kind of fun shit.”

“Hey,” Charlotte said quietly, reaching across the table for her husband’s hand, “he’ll be volunteering when he’s over there. That’s admirable.”

“He’s running away again and you know it, Charlie.”

Mari listened to their exchange, feeling utterly numb. She couldn’t believe Austin had taken off without even saying a proper goodbye.

“—at least he went to see Della in person.”

As Mari caught the tail end of Charlotte’s remark, she glanced at the redhead in surprise. “He went to see Della?”

Charlotte nodded. “Earlier this morning. I don’t know what he said to her exactly, but Della sounded upset. Of course, when we spoke to her she insisted we shouldn’t be mad at him and told us not to pressure him in any way.”

“That woman is a fucking saint,” Nate muttered.