Society Rules (29 page)

Once more, she had the shivery feeling of comfort. Her horrified feeling quickly hit the highway, replaced with the overwhelming sense of being cared for. It felt good. He pulled her close in his warm, strong embrace. Indie felt as though nothing bad could touch her while tucked into his arms.

She sighed and snuggled closer.

His response to her body pressing against his was instantly apparent, and it sent a thrill of anticipation through her. She now fought to control the thoughts that threatened to embarrass her with their direction. It was still difficult to believe it was possible that she affected him as strongly as he affected her.

Indie decided she had to try a little experiment, just to prove it to herself. This was all new; the feeling of being acutely irresistible to another person and she wanted to test the waters. Reaching up slowly, she sifted her fingers through his hair, and then linked them around the back of his neck.

Her gaze sank deeply into his eyes.

They were intense, wary and appraising, yet his starvation for her was there. Indie could almost smell it. She tilted her head back, and pulled his face closer. He was cautious, but did not resist.

Her lips touched his, and his caution vanished. Like a lightning strike, Jackson’s hands shot around her, crushing her into him as though to merge into one being. He was making the most heart wrenching sounds, low and deep, revealing the depth of his longing.

She moved her mouth to his neck and shoulders, and found herself lifted off her feet, and carried toward the huge bed. Indie was barely aware of the soft thud of the suitcase and duffle bag hitting the wood floor as they were unceremoniously shoved aside.

There came a terrible moment of recognition for Indie, in the feeling of desperate need she could feel pouring forth from Jackson . . . because it reminded her of Will.

In those few and far between moments when they’d connected physically, she’d felt that same yearning. A plea for her to soothe him . . . to fix what was tormenting him.

But she never could.

Those times were nothing more than a short reprieve for Will’s inner angst, and it was the same for Indie. Temporary shelter from the loneliness that surrounded them; locking her in some sort of emotional quarantine.

But with the recognition came realization.

This was different. Although the fierce need and longing were nearly identical, with Jackson, there was resolution.

Closure.

Satisfaction for all parties. Not necessarily sexual satisfaction, although Indie was willing to bet that this was going to be the case, but through her senses . . . her touch, there was the absolute promise that the need was finally going to be met. In addition, she was going to actually meet someone else’s.

Will was like a cracked vessel that could never be filled. Not by her anyway. It was the same both ways, with her need to feel loved and wanted simply a never-ending void.

She was already feeling Jackson’s desperation and longing temper into a joyful feeling of coming
home
. What remained was his overwhelming urge to seal the deal . . . to lose themselves in the sensations of the physical demonstration of their emotional connection.

Jackson’s eyes narrowed at her slightly, as he picked up on the vague idea that there was some sort of comparison between himself and the false mate going on in his beloved’s head.

He pushed her onto the bed like an animal, ripping away the white down comforter, and then froze, poised above her. Lifting himself on his knees, he tried to slow his breathing as he fought back against his need to claim.

“Okay,” he panted. “You are simply going to have to behave! You’re completely destroying what’s left of my civility. Believe me, Indie, you don’t want me to lose my control!”

She grabbed him again, and pulled him toward her. “Aw, go ahead and lose it!” she teased.

With another blindingly quick motion, he rolled onto his back, and now had her on top of him. “I have to control myself, Indie,” he breathed unevenly into her ear. “All of my training—our teachings—have been about maintaining self control at all times.” He looked up at her pointedly.

“Besides, our union has to be recognized by an Elder, before . . . well, before we . . . . uh . . . .”

Indie stared at him, incredulous as something began to dawn on her. Jackson, so collected, confident and in charge, and yet, he could not even say aloud any kind of euphemism for
sex
! She went a little dizzy as the implication began to sink in, but the idea was hard to imagine.

Could anyone as beautiful and appealing as this man be inexperienced with women? How curious.

Curious and electrically exciting.

“Before we
what?”
she pressed, being very bad, indeed. She wanted to hear him say it.

“So, okay. I guess you have gathered that I have, um, waited for you . . . my entire life!” He stroked her hair, letting it cover his face, hiding and looking very uncomfortable.

“Waited for me?”

Indie knew exactly what he was trying to say. “I can’t believe that you’re still a . . .”

“Don’t say it out loud, please!” he pleaded, as Indie fought a smile. He rolled her off his belly, and sat on the edge of the bed, looking a little put out.

“Yeah, I know.” He smiled a little. “I think they even made a movie about me, right? The Forty Year Old
Virgin
!”

That did it. She burst into a fit of giggles, succumbing completely. Her laughter continued while he watched patiently, arms crossed.

Indie thought she might never be able to collect herself, she was so taken by surprise, but eventually, she stifled her shameful laughter, which was totally at his expense.

“Do you think you’ll be okay?” he asked, dryly.

“I’m sorry.” She shook her head. “Really, it wasn’t even like it was so funny. It just . . . shocked me I suppose. But, you
do
want me?” she asked, needing suddenly to hear it from him.

“That would be a big affirmative! Isn’t it obvious that the flesh is most willing?” he laughed. “I want you nearly more than I can bear, and you aren’t making it any easier, you know.”

She was intrigued, and wanted to know more about how she made
him
feel.

“What do I
smell
like, to you?” she asked, suddenly.

What
?

He looked a little caught off guard, as his mind was still distracted by the word “
want.”
Indie shifted on the bed to better look at him.

“Well,” she began, “you always read in those corny romance novels about someone being drawn to a person by their scent, right?”

“Er, well, I haven’t actually had much opportunity to notice such a thing, seeing as I so very rarely allow myself to be caught reading . . . what did you call them . . . ‘corny romance novels’.”

Indie snickered at the thought as she flushed.

“Okay, I guess that was a dumb statement. But anyway, I’ve always thought it was such a cliché, actually finding myself irritated by the over-use of the idea, but I swear, you have a scent about you that is warm, safe, comfortable and cozy; I guess that describes it best, and I was wondering if you noticed a scent like that from me?”

Jackson returned to rest fully on the bed, his back against the pillows.

“Let’s see. I guess if I had to describe it,” he said thoughtfully, “I would say that your scent is one of brightness. Of all things fresh and green. Like after a cleansing rain, the smell of honeysuckle, or of a freshly sliced apple . . . absolutely intoxicating,” he added, dreamily.

“Really? And
green
has a scent?”

He looked at her with a confident smile. “Absolutely green has a scent! And it is
you
!”

Indie laughed now. “Are you sure it’s not blue? Purple or red?”

This earned her a fluff to the hair as he informed her that the only two colors that have a scent, are green and orange, and she decided that she liked this idea. She wasn’t sure what she had expected to hear, but was immensely pleased with his description.

She lay back on the pillows next to him and sobered. “Does it hurt you that I didn’t . . . wait for you, as you did for me?” She really didn’t want to hear the answer, but felt guilty about her experiences after learning of his untouched status.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Indie,” he shook his head, grimacing. “How could you be expected to wait for something, or in this case, some
one
, whom you knew nothing about?”

“That’s true,” she answered, “but not what I asked you.” She could feel the answer in his head, and he tossed it suddenly, as if to shake her out.

“Look, I am not going to pretend that the idea of another man touching you doesn’t make me feel a little war-like.” He tried to smile. “But I don’t blame you, and I feel no animosity, especially in light of what you gained from that experience . . . something that I could never have given you.” He closed his eyes and sighed as he said this.

“What is it that I gained from Will that you could never have given me?” She could not imagine.

“Children, Indie.” His whisper exposed his pain beautifully. As she stared at him, he picked up a small pillow and turned it over in his hands as he spoke.

“A funny thing about our genetics . . . our history,” he explained, “is that the original ancestors had no ability or need to procreate. They were incapable of death, (he winced at her sharp intake of breath) and so, I suppose there was no biological need to make more.

“After the ancestors became flesh, and mingled with humankind, they were able to procreate with the people, as was the intention, in the process of improving the population. However, when the full set of genetic markers are present, making us the very same as the original ancestors, we are drawn to our
Equal
, another pure descendent, and together, the genetics do not allow the making of children.

The only way for a Member to be created now is through the genetic spin of the roulette wheel, and yet, there is always a matched set. This is to compensate for the inability to conceive together, as you will have a true and devoted companion for life.”

“I see.” Indie said, thoughtfully. “So, Society Members are sort of like . . . mules!”

Jackson blinked in surprise.

“Yeah . . . ah . . .
what
?” A small huff of a laugh escaped him as he looked at Indie.

“Like, in the way that you can only make a mule, by crossing what is in essence, two different breeds, and you get the hybrid, the mule. But you can’t breed two mules, and get a mule. They are always sterile!”

He chuckled. “Well then, I guess that about sums it up.” He laughed in earnest now. “We are like mules! Except,” he added, “we are not the hybrid here. We are the pure bloods, and the rest of humankind are the hybrids.”

Looking up at Indie again, he gestured toward her with a sweep of his hand.

“But even among Society members, there are those with the genetics of two different ranks of the ancestors and enjoy the traits of both. You, for example, bear the bloodlines of two of the highest ranking of our kind.”

He then placed his hand over his own chest, and looked up at her with the nearly submissive look Indie thought she’d noticed back at her—at
Will’s
house. “And then there are those as I am, with the bloodlines of only one type. Pure, but one of the lowest of the hierarchy. But none can procreate together.”

“Interesting,” breathed Indie. “So you
know
, somehow, that I have the genetics of two ranks, I gather?”

“Upon our contact, I could sense your ancestry.”

“But you say you are low-ranking, and I—I am of the highest? So I, um,
out-rank
you?” She couldn’t help but smile at the thought.

“Yeah, but don’t get all excited about
that
! Society Members have a very deep-seated instinct to follow our hierarchy, but I am also a fighter. And very strong willed about protecting you, so it should be very interesting to see how this plays out.

That is what I was so surprised about, when we made contact. Members of my rank in particular, are pretty much always matched with the same bloodlines.” He narrowed the blue eyed stare in her direction. “Although there has to be a reason, it doesn’t matter anyway. I will happily do your bidding, unless I see a strong need to take your leadership from you!”

“Oh, really? Well the idea of you
trying
sounds a little exciting, actually,” Indie tossed back at him, just to watch him squirm.

But higher-ranking?

Hierarchies? What did it all mean?

And she’d just found another reason to thank God for Will; her children.