Southern Belles, a Novel About Love, Purpose & Second Chances (9781310340970) (34 page)

“Thank you so much doctor.” I said, wanting
to run back to see Lucy, as fast as I could to kiss her and wrap my
arms around her tiny body.

“You are welcome. Follow me.” He said
turning towards the double doors.

“Our Lucy’s okay.” My mother said, walking
next to me, with her arm around my shoulder.

“Mom, I was so worried.”

“I know sweetie. I was too.”

“Okay, you’ll need to wash your hands before
you go in. She’s stable but we need to be careful. Probably just a
few minutes for all of you to visit should be fine. Mom—you’re
allowed to stay for as long as Lucy is here with no restrictions.”
Dr. Greenfield said.

I washed my hands quickly and thoroughly to
make sure I wasn’t bringing any extra germs in. I walked into the
room and saw her small body in a hospital crib. A tube was coming
out of her mouth just like the doctor said. It was taped to her
face. There was a nurse reading her vitals and writing them down.
Beeps and humming equipment surrounded Lucy as she slept
peacefully. My baby was safe in the midst of the storm that shook
us from our beds this morning. I thanked God as I touched her
slender arms and stroked her bronzed blonde hair that fell just
below her shoulders.

“I’m Jenny. I’ll be Lucy’s nurse until the
next shift.”

“Thank you. I’m Char, her mom.” I said
quietly as I kept my hands and eyes on Lucy.

“Honey, we won’t stay too long. I know the
doctor doesn’t want too many people in here. We just want to peek
at her and tell her we love her—even though she’s sleeping.” My
mother said slipping her hand into the crib to rub Lucy’s
cheek.

I stood towards the front of Lucy’s bed as
my mother, father, and brother, Richie, gathered around her. The
nurse finished up documenting data and hung up Lucy’s chart, in the
slot by the door, before stepping out. My mom and dad or as Lucy
calls them, nana and papa, kissed her cheeks and forehead and spoke
softly to her that they loved her. Richie rubbed her tiny hand in
his. After a few moments, my dad grabbed my hand and nudged my mom
and Richie to hold hands. My dad placed his other hand on Lucy’s
head and began to pray for her continued healing and health. He
prayed for comfort for Lucy and strength for me. He thanked God for
the love and joy that she brings into our lives and finished
praying.

“Is there anything I can get you before we
leave? How about some lunch? You didn’t even have breakfast.” My
mother commented.

“Um, okay. If you want; I’m not that hungry
right now, though.” I said still focusing on Lucy.

“She’s going to be fine.” My dad said
putting his arm around me before kissing the top of my head.

“I know.” I said starting to tear up.

“Oh honey. Your dad’s right, she’s going to
be fine.” My mother said hugging the other side of me.

“I know. It just scared me so bad. Her lips
were dark blue. What if I hadn’t woken up in time?” I said starting
to cry as I watched her underneath the tape, breathing tube, and
wires taped all along her arm.

“We can’t focus on those things. She’s going
to be okay.” My mom said.

“What if it happens again?” I said pulling
my sleeve up to my face to wipe away the puddle of tears on my
cheek and neck.

“The doctor said that he’s going to have her
use a nebulizer to prevent that from happening again.” My dad said
in a matter-of-fact.

“She’s safe and she’s going to remain safe.”
My mom added as she hugged me closer.

“She’s got to—she’s my whole world.”

“Richard, I’m going to get some food from
the cafeteria for Char and see if the doctor will let me stay a
little while with Char—so she’s not alone right now. I’ll be back
in a bit if you will stay with her until I return.” My mother said
squeezing my hand before heading out the door.

“Okay dear.” He called back.

My father pulled up a chair for me to sit in
and another for himself. Richie stood back keeping a watchful eye
on Lucy. We talked some but my father knew that right now I just
needed to be with Lucy, with little distraction or noise. We all
waited for my mother to return. The nurse came in again to read the
computer monitors and jot down some more information. She asked if
she could get us something to drink. I kindly declined the offer
and she persisted, noting that she had the time to get us drinks
and stated that the hospital rooms get very dry. I recanted, and
asked for grape juice as my father and Richie requested for water.
Several minutes later, she came back into the room with our
beverages. She handed me my grape juice as I sat tensely, beside
Lucy’s bed. I removed the paper off the top of the straw and
flashed back to almost two years earlier, in the same hospital. I
was tired and had just given birth to Lucy. Exhausted, I held this
tiny, perfect, little beauty all bundled up on my chest. I looked
at her in awe as I had never felt or could have imagined the love I
would feel for my child. I kissed her small forehead as her cries
became quieted by the closeness of her body to mine. As the midwife
finished up with me I looked over at Lucy and watched the nurses
take her vitals. I remember the midwife saying I lost a lot of
blood. The nurse offered to get me grape juice to help with my
fatigue.

“Okay, so I spoke with Dr. Greenfield and he
said that I could stay a few hours with you Char. I also brought
you a bacon cheeseburger and fries from the cafeteria.” My mother
said pulling up the bedside table to my chair.

“I think we’re going to leave then dear.” My
dad said, standing up abruptly.

“Thank you dad for coming and praying.
Please keep praying.”

“You know I will honey.” My dad said,
hugging me tightly.

“Thank you.” I said as he kissed my forehead
before letting go to kiss Lucy.

“I love you Char.” Richie said hugging me
next. “She’s going to be fine and home by tomorrow.”

“Thanks Rich.”

“Honey, I’ll pick you up around five PM.” My
dad said, kissing my mother goodbye.

“Thank you; can you tell Rose that I said
thank you and that Lucy is stable?” She said, holding his
embrace.

“Yes, I’ll let her know babe.”

“Thank you guys,” My mother told them as she
hugged Richie goodbye next.

“No problem mom.”

“Thanks dad, thank you Richie.” I said,
before they disappeared out the door. “Mom, thank you for staying
with me and getting me food,” I added.

“You’re welcome sweetie. Eat it before it
gets cold. Here—I’ll help you with the fries.” She smiled, grabbing
a small handful of fries.

I ate the burger like I was famished. I
hadn’t even given food a thought with Lucy’s life hanging in the
balance. I scarfed down the burger in mere minutes and moved onto
the fries before reaching out to grab my grape juice to wash it all
down. My mother snacked on an apple that she pulled out of her
purse.

We sat close together beside Lucy’s bed. My
mother was always my biggest comfort when things got overwhelming.
She talked about things to take my mind off the present stressors.
Known for her kindness and humor, she knew how to make me laugh and
ease my stress. She brushed my long brown hair and braided it into
a fish tail down the side of my head as she told me stories of her
and Aunt Juanita when they were younger. She also shared some of
the events that me and my brothers did to scare her when we were
youngsters and reassured me that Lucy would be fine. My mother told
me how proud she was of me and of all my accomplishments. She got a
bit tearful as she expressed how rewarding it was for her to watch
me parent Lucy and told me that I was a wonderful, kind, and fun
mother. She was good at giving people compliments and did so at
every opportunity. I was so relieved to have my mother with me; she
knew just what to do and say.

“If you want to take a little rest, I’ll be
right here with you and Lucy. Since, you’re spending the night, you
might get tired later. That way too—when she wakes up you’ll be
able to spend time with her if you’re more rested now.” My mom
tried coaxing me.

“I don’t know that I can sleep but thank you
mom.”

“If you change your mind—there’s a recliner
over there you can curl up in.” She pointed.

“Thanks.” I yawned.

“See, you’re tired and could use some rest.
I’ll be right here honey if she wakes up before you. If she does, I
promise to wake you right away.” She said looking in the cabinet
for something.

“Okay, I guess. I’m tired but I just want to
make sure she sees my face first because she won’t know where she
is or why the tube is in her mouth.” I said, bending down to kiss
her forehead.

“I found you a pillow and a blanket dear.”
My mother turned around with both.

“Thanks mom.” I said before I whispered “I
love you sugar face” into Lucy’s ear.

“Come get comfy and I’ll cover you up.”

“Mommy loves you baby.” I said, stroking
Lucy’s cheek again as I kissed her another few times.

“I’ll close the shades too—that should help
block some of the light out.”

“Thanks mom. I’m not sure that I’m going to
fall asleep though.”

“Okay, sit down already so I can cover you
up. Your dad will be back in a few hours and you should get some
rest now dear.”

“Okay, okay.”

She turned the lights down low and only a
few streams of light peeked in from the blinds. She reclined the
chair and placed the soft pillow to the left of my head to lean
against. Next, she laid the hospital blanket on top of me and
tucked in the corners around my arms and sides and under my
feet.

“I love you Char. Get some rest. I will be
right here with Lucy. She is fine.” She reassured. “I’ll wake you
up when dad comes unless Lucy wakes up before then.”

“Okay, thanks mom.” I said yawning before I
closed my eyes and tried to stop the many thoughts running through
my mind.

I laid there with my eyes closed thinking
about the day. I turned to peek at Lucy.

“She’s fine honey.” My mom said, without
looking up.

I turned towards the windows again catching
a glare from the sun peering through the cracks in between the
shades. I was comfortable and tired but still wanted to be there
when Lucy awoke from her sleep. I closed my eyes again. I wondered
about Skylar, randomly, before I felt a small sense of guilt for
not thinking about Eric first. After all, he had been there for me
and Lucy and would be here now if he weren’t taking care of his
father, in Savannah. He was so good to me and I felt bad for
letting my mind drift towards Skylar before him. After I stopped
the argument amongst myself and my thoughts I thought about CeCe. A
pang of anger sprang up—she should have cared enough to try and
come to the hospital, if not at least call, to see how Lucy was
doing. This was important; she should have been here. I wondered
what I’d done to push her so far away. She was the only best friend
I had ever known, other than maybe Richie or my mother. She was
there for everything big and small, scary and funny. There was
nothing she did not know about me. She was the only person I ever
truly felt comfortable bearing my soul to, other than Skylar. I
missed her so much and at the same time felt resentment towards her
for disappearing out of my life just like Skylar. CeCe didn’t have
an excuse though. I couldn’t think of anything so bad that I
would’ve done to hurt her or make her that mad at me. We’d been
joined to the hip since third grade. The last six months CeCe had
been nothing more than a stranger or at most an acquaintance in my
life. I grappled with the swirling, tangled, thoughts of CeCe, Eric
and Skylar. I just needed to turn off my mind. I silently prayed
for rest and for Lucy to continue to get better before drifting off
to sleep for what seemed only a moment.

“Charlotte, honey, wake up. Your dad’s here
and I’m leaving in just a few minutes.” I heard my mother say as I
jolted awake.

“Is she up?” I looked over at Lucy with
glazed eyes.

“No honey, she’s still sleeping. But she’s
fine. The nurses are coming in and checking on her every half
hour.” My mom said, straightening out my braid.

“Okay. Thank you for waking me up mom.” I
yawned, scratching my head

“You’re welcome sweetie. Do you want to sit
in this chair?”

“Yeah, give me a minute to wake up. I didn’t
realize I was that tired.”

“That’s okay babe. You’ve had a long
day.”

“Yeah, it has been a long day.”

“You know you can call anytime of the day if
you need to honey.” My mother insisted as I slept-walked to her
chair.

“Okay mom. I’ll call you when she wakes up
unless it’s in the middle of the night.” I said, bringing the
covers with me to cuddle up in.

“Alright, I love you Char. I love you too
sugar bug.” She said to Lucy kissing her nose, gently, before
turning around to lean my head into her arms. “You can call me
whenever.”

“Thanks mom. I will if I need to.”

“Okay sweetie. Bye girls.” She waved as she
stepped away.

“Bye mom. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

She left and it was Lucy and I again. I
looked over at Lucy and she remained still. Her color had gotten
better and I watched as her chest raised and lowered in a relaxed
manner. I picked up her hand closest to me and held it in my right
hand. Her other hand had an oximeter on her index finger with tape
all over it to keep it in place. She hadn’t moved but appeared to
be comfortable enough. The humming continued which I had barely
noticed at this point other than the deafening silence that filled
the room. On occasion, the sound of nurses talking as they passed
by the door echoed in.

I held tight to Lucy’s slightly warm fingers
and put my feet up on the side of her bed. I wrapped the covers
around my midsection and sipped the last of my lukewarm grape juice
before tossing it in the trash can beside the table. I leaned close
to her bed and quietly hummed
you are my sunshine.
I was
still sleepy and could barely control myself from yawning. I jerked
uncomfortably as I had begun to fall asleep again.