Surrender to Me (5 page)

Chapter Four

Lucas

I’m sitting on the bed waiting for Becca to come out, trying to figure out what’s taking her so long.  I know that girls take a while to get ready some times, but she doesn’t strike me as one of those girls.  When she walks out of the bathroom she takes my breath away.  She has on a little dress thing that’s pink with thin little straps and it seems to cup her breasts and make them look even better.  It stops about mid-thigh, and I can already feel myself getting hard.  She told me earlier that she didn’t want to have sex tonight, but her outfit seems to say something different.

When I look back at her face I can see that she’s blushing.  “Sorry I took so long; my sister didn’t pack me any normal pajamas.  This must be her idea of a cruel joke.”

Or a fucking present.
  I stand up and walk over to her, placing my hands on her hips and loving the feel of the silk beneath my hands.  I slowly circle my thumbs, massaging her hips and trying to contain the urge to throw her onto the bed.  “I think you look fucking gorgeous.”  Her eyes snap up to mine and I lower my head, capturing her mouth before she can reply.  I love how soft her lips are and she always tastes so good.

I hear her bag drop to the ground as her hands find their way around my neck.  If she really doesn’t want to have sex tonight I need to try to stop now, because I’m pretty sure that if this goes any further I won’t be able to back things up.  I pull back and rest my forehead against hers, both of us breathing heavy.  Running my hand up her side, I feel her shiver beneath my touch.  When I reach her face, I brush her hair back behind her ear and give her lips one more soft kiss.

“Listen, Luke, I know I told you that I didn’t want anything to happen tonight, and this outfit doesn’t really go along with that.  I don’t want you to feel like I’m trying to mess with you or anything, but I really have nothing else to sleep in.”

“If you want a t-shirt and shorts you can always borrow something of mine.”  I only offer because I can tell how uncomfortable she is and I know I won’t be able to keep my hands—or other things—off of her.  “Don’t get me wrong, I think you look amazing, but I don’t want you to be self conscious all night.”

“Um, that might actually be a good idea.”  I walk over to my suitcase, grab one of my shirts and a pair of boxer shorts and toss them her way.  “Thanks.”

She disappears back into the bathroom and comes out a few minutes later wearing my clothes.  I would love to say that her changing helped my hard on, but it would be a lie.  Now she’s walking around the room in my clothes, and I feel like I have almost, in a way, staked my claim.

“So are you tired from the show tonight?”

I look over at her sitting Indian-style on the bed.  “No, not really.  It usually takes me a couple hours to wind down after a show.  Do you want to watch a movie or something?”   I can think of a lot more things I’d like to do with her than watch a movie, but I’m trying my best to be good.

“Sure.”  She crawls up to the head of the bed and sits next to me.  I turn to look at her and all I can think about is kissing her again.  I want to constantly be touching her; I feel like whenever I do, things are just better.  I scoot closer to her and put my arm around her shoulders while simultaneously pulling her down so her head is resting on my chest.  I flip through the channels aimlessly but nothing catches my eye so I just turn it off.  When I do, Becca looks up at me with a question in her eyes.

“If I’m being honest, I have no interest in TV right now.”  She smiles at me but still appears to be uncomfortable.  “I’m actually a little hungry, how about you?”

“Yeah, a little bit.  Do you want me to go grab something?”

“No, I was just going to order from room service. That okay?”

She nods and I get up to find the menu.  We decide on getting dessert; it’s so nice to be with a girl who actually eats.  We order cake and ice cream and it makes me laugh because I feel like such a kid right now.

My phone starts to ring and I see that it’s my mom.  I figure I might as well answer or she’ll keep calling until I do.  We talk for a few minutes, but the food soon arrives and I have to end the call.  We decide to eat in bed, even though there’s a huge table in the other room.   Once we’re settled I decide I want to know more about her.  “So, tell me your story, Becca Carmichael.”

Rebecca

He wants to know about me and I really have no idea what to say.  I overheard part of his conversation with his mom; he was talking to her about an old friend of his.  I don’t really know the story, but I
did
hear him say to his mom that there was no way he would ever be close to him again because he despises liars.

In my defense, I really didn’t lie on purpose.  Luke
assumed
my last name was Carmichael and that Jen is my sister.  Granted, I never told him it
wasn’t
true but what was I supposed to do now?  I have two choices: I can either come clean and risk him kicking me out of his room and never get the chance to know him, or I can go along with the story and hope for the best.  It’s not like we’re going to be together forever.

I opt for the latter decision.  “My life is actually pretty boring and normal.” 
I wish.
  “My mom is a lawyer and my dad is a surgeon.  You’ve met Jen and she’s just as crazy as she seems.  I love kids, which is why I decided to go into education.  Oh, and apparently I need to pay more attention to pop culture, that way the next time a famous singer asks me to help him jump his car I won’t treat him like a creeper.”

He starts to laugh and I hope I’ve said enough he’ll drop the subject.  “Well, since we’re going to make a go at this, famous singer or not, treat every guy that comes up to you like a creeper.”  He winks at me and I can feel my cheeks start to heat up the way only he can make them.

Am I really doing this?  Going out with Lucas Masterson?
  I take another quick bite of my cake, trying to fill my mouth with food so I can avoid answering him.  He leans forward and swipes his thumb over my bottom lip.  “You had a little chocolate there.”  Then he puts his thumb to his mouth and sucks it off.  Before I can stop myself, I utter what can only be described as a cross between a whimper and a moan.

Oh.  My.  God.  What the hell is wrong with me? 
I look up to see if he noticed my slip up, only to find him staring at me with such heat in his eyes I’m surprised my ice cream didn’t liquefy immediately. 
Jesus Christ, this man oozes sex and deliciousness.
  I really don’t know what’s gotten into me.  I used to not give a crap if a guy was interested in me, or even if he tried to hit on me.  They all seemed so irrelevant, but Luke is a whole different story.

I look down at my plate only to see that my brain has been working so frantically to keep my mouth busy that I’ve finished the entire slice of cake in less than a minute. 
God, what am I?  Some kind of barbarian who’s never had food before?
  I hear Luke start to laugh and look up to see him staring at me.  “Want me to order you another piece?”

Ugh!  Way to make yourself look like a damn pig, Becca!
  “No, I um…I’m fine.”  I get up and set the empty plate on the table, then go and sit back down on the bed.  As soon as I do, Luke moves over so he’s right next to me.  “So tell me about yourself, Lucas Masterson, or I can just look you up on Google.”

“I would definitely rather you
not
look me up…ever.”  He chuckles and looks up at me.   “I’m from Texas; my family has a farm out there.  I know, I know, a hillbilly turned rock star—hysterical, right?”  I laugh at the thought.  “My mom, dad, and grandparents all still live out there and if I ever really want to get away, that’s the first place I go.  I’m the type of person that will do anything and everything for the people that I care about, but unfortunately, a lot of times that’s how you get taken advantage of.  I usually don’t let people in very easily, except you.  There’s just something about you that’s drawing me in and telling me to trust you.  I know I’ve said that several times now, but it’s the best way I know to describe this feeling I have.” 
Well, that makes me feel like an asshole.  I really need to tell him the truth.

“Luke, listen, I…”

“No, wait, I know that I might be moving a little fast for you and I’m sorry.  You told me earlier that you didn’t want to just jump into things and I will respect that, or at least I’ll
try
to.”

He goes to take the last bite of his cake and then stops.  He holds the fork up to my mouth and I open it, letting him slide it in.  I don’t know why, but there is something so sensual and hot about having him feed me.  I close my lips around the fork as he gently slides it out of my mouth.  His stare is melting my insides and I have to force myself to look away.  I can feel some excess cake at the corner of my mouth and reach for a napkin to wipe it away.

Luke grabs my hand and stops me.  “Let me.”  He leans over and puts the empty plate on the nightstand and turns back to me.  He kneels in front of me, and since I’m still sitting, he’s a good five or six inches taller than me.  He slips his hand behind my neck and his other grabs my waist, pulling me closer to him.  When he leans down, I hold my breath because I knew what’s coming.  His tongue slides lightly over the corner of my mouth, erasing any trace of the dessert that was left.  I put my hands on his chest and grip the t-shirt he’s wearing in my fists.

I can feel myself getting wet and he hasn’t actually kissed me yet.  I look up to find him staring at me with those captivating eyes that make me want to strip off every piece of clothing I’m wearing.  This is so far from the person that I am, but whoever this person is, she wants Lucas Masterson, and she wants him
bad
.

When he touches his lips to mine it’s almost like a current of electricity runs through me.  I sigh, causing my lips to part, and give Luke the opening that he needs.  His tongue expertly slips into my mouth, massaging me with a tenderness that’s also burning with need.  The man knows what he’s doing, and he has me coming completely undone.  His hand grips my hip even tighter and he starts to lower me to the bed.

He moves so his body completely covers mine.  I can feel myself arching into him, and at the same time my mind is yelling at my body to stop; I’m not ready for this.  When his hand starts to move down my body, I panic.  I go stiff and he immediately stops to look at me.

“Becca? What’s wrong?”

I sit up, forcing him off of me at the same time.  I need to get out of here; I can’t let him see me freak out.  I run over to my bag, grab some pants and a shirt and then head straight for the bathroom.

He grabs my arm before I make it all the way.  “Wait, I’m sorry. I know you said that you didn’t want this to go far tonight.  I just…you seemed okay with it.  Please stay.”

I look up at him, cursing myself for ever agreeing to go out with him.  He’s going to be my undoing; the one person that can crack me open and make me surrender all of myself to him.  The very thought of that happening scares the shit out of me.  I’m not really sure why, but I have always had this issue with sex. Whenever I get close to being intimate with a guy I freak out.  I really think it’s just because I’m terrified of letting someone in and actually trusting them.

His eyes are pleading with me to stay and not walk out.  Why is it so hard for me to leave?  I barely know him.  This is the part that scares me the most; somehow I’m already so attached to him.  Love always happens so fast in movies and books, but not in real life. Right?

He takes the clothes out of my hands and throws them on top of my bag.  Then he takes my hand and leads me back over to the bed.  I look at him warily, knowing that I should run; I should leave and never look back because he’s dangerous for me.  I don’t, though.  He pulls off the t-shirt he’s wearing, folds back the sheets and climbs into the bed.  I sit down next to him and let him pull me close to him, so my head is lying on his chest.  We just lay there for a few minutes, both of us at a loss for words.

I bring my hand up and start to trace the lines of the sun and the hawk on his chest.  I look up at him only to find him studying me.  “What does your tattoo mean?”

“Well, the hawk is a symbol for being able to see things from a different perspective and being able to see them for what they really are.  The sun is from a story in Greek mythology.  Icarus was trying to escape an island with his father who was a great inventor and he had made them wings that would help them fly away.  His father had told him to follow his path, but Icarus got cocky and took his own route.  He ended up going off track and flew too close to the sun, which destroyed the wings and caused him to fall into the sea and drown.  I got both of them together to remind myself to always try to see people for who and what they are, but to never be too cocky about it because it could destroy me.”

All I can do in this moment is lay here and hope that I’m not going to be another person in his life that destroys him.

Lucas

I fell asleep with Becca in my arms last night and it felt so good.  Usually girls would come over, we would have sex, they would leave, and I would be left alone in a cold, empty bed.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I ever really wanted any of those girls to stay the night, but it was a totally different experience with Becca.  I think back to how amazing it felt to have her in my arms kissing her, but then I remember her reaction to it.  There’s something there; something that’s stopping her from letting herself go.  I want to find out what it is so bad, but at the same time I don’t want to push her.

Waking up and knowing that I don’t need to deal with Samantha, Jackson, or any of the bullshit politics that go along with them, makes me happy.  Jackson knows that I like her and I know that now he’s going to be after her constantly.  That asshole can never have something original—he always needs to take something from someone—maybe it makes him feel like a man or some shit.  If he thinks he’s just going to swoop in and take her, though, he has another thing coming to him.

I sense Becca starting to wake up—she’s curling into me even more than she already was—when she opens her eyes she seems startled at first.  Once she realizes where she is, her body relaxes and she looks up at me.  When she sees me looking at her she smiles and a blush starts to form on her cheeks.

I lean down and place a kiss on her lips.  “Good morning.”

“Good morning, have you been up for a while?”

Usually, even if I did wake up early, I would keep falling back asleep until it was almost lunchtime, but not now when I only have her for a week.  “No, just a couple of minutes.  Do you have anything that you want to do today?”

She shakes her head no.  “You’re the one who’s new in town, what do
you
want to do?”

I smile at her question, because if I tell her what I
really
want to do, she’ll pass out.  “I’ll take any suggestions from you; it’s supposed to be really nice out today, though, so I wouldn’t mind doing something outside.”

“Okay, I’ll try and figure something out, then.  Do you have anything you can’t stand doing?”

I can’t stand not being able to have her the way I want to, but I won’t tell her that right now.