Surrender to Me (6 page)

Rebecca

Where do you take a rock star?  I don’t even know where to begin.  I know he probably isn’t going to want to go somewhere he’ll be recognized easily, so the mall, movies and probably theme parks are out.  What if I take him to the PA Renaissance Faire?  Is that really uncool?  Ugh!  I have no idea what to do so I pull out my phone to text Jen.

Me: So I’m trying to figure out somewhere to take Lucas today…what do you think of the Renaissance Faire?

Jen: Really Becs? The Ren Faire?

Me:
Yeah…why?

Jen: I’m just saying if I was with that boy the only place I would be taking him would be back to bed ;-)

Me: You’re not helping!

Jen: I’m trying to but you’re a prude!

Me: Have you ever heard of the saying “Why would he by the cow when he can get the milk for free?”

Jen: Bitch don’t kid yourself he gets tons of milk but he wants you, you stupid cow!

Me: Ugh! Whatever! Thanks a lot!

Jen: Welcome!

“So, did you think of anywhere you want to go?”  I jump when he comes up right behind me.  I can feel his hot breath on my neck and his hard muscles against my back.  Sagging back into him, I wonder if Jen’s right.  He puts his hands on my hips to steady me and my skin catches fire. 
What the hell is my problem?
Am I really going to let other people’s actions affect what I want?  Then that little annoying voice in my head starts to remind me that he isn’t sticking around forever.

I step away from Luke and turn around to look at him.  There’s a fire in his eyes that makes me want to throw away every reservation I have.  “I did, but I don’t know if it’s something that you’ll be interested in doing.”

“I’m up for whatever you want to do, Becca.”  He steps close to me, pulling me against him, and I can’t help but think we aren’t talking about our date anymore.  He drops his head down and kisses me; it amazes me how soft and full his lips are for a guy.  We stand there for a couple minutes just holding and kissing each other; I’m running my hands up and down his back while his are gripped firmly on my hips.  When he pulls back I wanted to protest but know it’s for the best.  I love that he’s respecting what I want and have asked of him.  “I’ll tell you what.  I want you to surprise me; just put the address in the GPS and I’ll drive.”

“What if it isn’t something that you want to do?”

“Don’t worry about that; I’m sure whatever it is, we’ll have a good time doing it.”  He swoops down and gives me another quick kiss.  “If you want to get dressed we can leave whenever you’re ready.”

“Okay.”  I grab my bag and head into the bathroom.  I’m really going to kill Jen; every single thing she packed me was a low cut, short dress.  I finally pick one and slip it on.  The dress is light blue, which looks good against my tanned skin, and is cut into a V, making my boobs look at least two cups sizes bigger than they actually are.  The material is very lightweight, which is good since it’s supposed to be hot out today.

When I walk out of the bathroom Luke is sitting on the bed playing with his phone.  He looks up at me and his eyes get that fiery look in them that makes me want to lock this hotel room door and never leave.  He gets up and walks over to me, placing his hands on my lower back and pulling me against him.

“How in the world am I supposed to go anywhere with you looking like that?”

Embarrassment comes over me.  I knew I couldn’t pull this dress off; this was Jen’s style and she’s built so much better for it than I am.  “I thought it wasn’t right; Jen only packed me dresses, though.  I’ll see what else I can find.”  I turn away to retreat to the bathroom and try not to die of humiliation when he grabs my arm and turns me to face him.

“Hey, I meant that you look gorgeous and I don’t know how I’ll be able to deal with guys looking at you all day.  Becca, you’re beautiful.”

I can feel my cheeks start to heat up; a guy has never called me beautiful before.  Sure I’ve gotten the cat calls, and the occasional “you’re hot”, but no one has ever said anything like
that
to me and made me feel like they meant it.

“Come on, let’s go.”  He grabs my hand and leads me toward the door.  The entire time we’re driving, I’m second guessing my decision.  I really hope he doesn’t think this is stupid.

When we pull up, he looks over at me with a quizzical look on his face. “Where are we?”

“Well, you said you wanted to do something outside and I figured you would want to go somewhere that you wouldn’t be recognized as easily.  This is the PA Renaissance Faire; I’ve only been once before but I had a lot of fun and I thought it might be something different we could do.  If you’re not into it, though, we can totally go somewhere else.”

He grabs my hand and I peer up at him.  “Hey, I was just asking ‘cause I didn’t recognize it.  I promise I’m not some mean jerk, Becca; don’t always think the worst.”  He takes his baseball hat from the backseat and slips it onto his head; it’s the same one he had on the first day I met him.  “Well, I’m still not sure what we’ll be doing, but let’s get in there.”

He gets out of the car, and before I can, he’s at my door opening it for me.  I really need to learn to let myself relax around him, and as much as it scares me, I need to start letting my guard down.  Luke is nothing like I expected him to be; I would’ve thought someone like him would be a cocky, rude womanizing jerk.  Surprisingly, he isn’t and I need to stop treating him like he’s already done something wrong.

When we walk into the Faire I can’t help but smile; it’s just like I remembered it from when I was a kid.  People are dressed in period clothing and are walking around in character.  I look over at Luke and he looks like he has no idea what to say, and right now I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not.  He wraps one hand around my waist, pulls me close and looks down at me.  “This place is actually pretty cool; do you want to start exploring?”

We walk around and look at the different shops and food stands, just getting a grasp for everything that they have to offer.  When we come to one stand, Luke grabs my hand and pulls me over to where they have some big barrels.  I look at the sign and see it’s a booth where you can make wax molds of your hands.  There were many different molds of people’s hands in different positions placed around the booth: two hands being held together like they were praying, a thumbs up, a peace sign, a fist, and just a regular hand.  They all look so cool and I’m entranced by all of the different colors and designs when Luke grabs my hand.

“Do you want to make one?”  I look up at him, smile and nod my head.  When I start to let go of his hand to walk over to the barrels, he pulls me back.  “I want to make one together; the guy said that we can do one holding hands.  I thought it might be something cool to have.”

We walk over together and the guy who’s running it explains how we need to keep our hands very still.  There are giant barrels filled with different liquids.  He tells us to place our hands into the first, which is really hot wax, then into the next, which I think is just cold water.  We do this process a couple of times, trying to keep our hands still and trying not to trip over each other.   After we do it about three times he comes over and lifts our hands out.  The wax mold looks so cool!  He gently shimmies the mold off and our hands are finally free.  He tells us to let it sit and harden and we can come back to pick it up before we leave.

Luke and I walk around the rest of the day, stopping to eat here and there.  When he decides to try to eat a drumstick that was half the size of his head, I have to snap a picture.  Toward the end of the day everyone starts making their way over to the big arena to watch the red and blue knights get into a fight and a joust.  I start to sit down next to Luke when we get to the stands, but he pulls me down to sit on his lap and wraps his arms around my waist.  I tense up at first, wondering if I might end up crushing him by the end of the show, but quickly get over it and relax.

I lean back against him, amazed at how comfortable I already feel in his arms.  Something about having him wrap his arms around me makes me feel so safe and protected.  I turn my head to the side to find him looking at me; he smiles and leans in to kiss me.  We sit like this for the rest of the show, and when it’s over, I dread having to get up and move.  I’m so comfortable when I’m with him and I really can’t understand why because it’s totally not in my character to be this way with
any
guy.

I’m really surprised that no one has recognized him all day.  I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure this is the last place
anyone
would expect him to be, but his only disguise is a tattered baseball hat.  We stop by the stand to pick up the wax mold before heading back to the car.

I don’t realize how tired I am until we get into the car, and at some point on the ride home I fall asleep. The next time I open my eyes, I’m in his arms and he’s walking us into the hotel room.

I relax and let myself mold into his chest, realizing that I already never want to leave.

Chapter Five

Lucas

When we’d pulled up to the Faire today, I had my doubts that it would ever be something I might be into, but I think this has been one of the best days I’ve had in a while.  I know it has everything to do with a Becca; this girl is so different from anyone I have ever met before.  She has a positive outlook on everything and tries to make the best of every situation.

I couldn’t seem keep my hands off of her all day, either; I found myself just needing to be able to touch her in some way all the time.  As I’m carrying her up to the hotel room, the only thoughts in my head are what I want to do to her when we go to bed.  It’s going to be so hard for me to try and control myself, but I also don’t want to push her into something that she isn’t ready for.  She starts to wake up and then settles back into me.  I never intended to really fall for her; I was just intrigued by her.  I know after today, though, that there is no way I’m going to let her go.  I’m determined to make her mine in every way possible.

I know that if I have any chance of convincing her to stay with me—maybe even come on tour for the rest of the summer with me—I can’t pressure her too much for anything.  I walk into the bedroom and put her down on the bed.  As she stretches, her sun dress moves up her thighs, slowly torturing me by revealing more of her perfect skin.  She opens her eyes and smiles up at me.  Before I jump on top of her I turn away and head over to my bag.  Grabbing a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, I walk over and sit down on the bed.  “I thought you might want something to sleep in again.”

She sits up, looks at the clothes in my hand and smiles.  “Okay, I’ll go get changed.”  When she walks into the bathroom, I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.  How the hell am I going to sleep next to her all night and not touch her the way that I desperately want to?  She walks back into the bedroom, dressed in my clothes, and it turns me on even more.  I’m still sitting on the edge of the bed when she walks over to stand in front of me.  “I just wanted to say thank you for today.  I had such a wonderful time.” 

I place my hands on her hips and close the distance between us.  I’m so much taller than her that even with me sitting on the bed I’m almost eye level with her.  I want to say something to her, maybe even tell her how I’ve been feeling all day, but I can’t take my eyes off her lips.  I lean in and crush my mouth to hers, needing her with every ounce of my being. 

She wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me closer to her.  I move my mouth to her neck, needing to taste her the way that I’ve wanted to all day.  I kiss and nip my way down her neck until I get to my shirt that she’s wearing.  I want to lift it over her head, throw her on the bed and make her mine over and over again.  I know that if I do that now I risk losing her, and there is no way in hell I’m willing to risk that right now.

I pull back from her neck, give her another kiss on the lips and rest my forehead against hers.  She opens her eyes and we just stay there, staring at each other.  I can see the uncertainty in her eyes and it reinforces everything that just went through my head.  “I’m going to go get ready for bed, okay?”

She nods her head and slowly unwraps her arms from my neck.  I get up and walk into the bathroom, hoping that a very cold shower will help me calm down a little bit, although that’s pretty doubtful.

Rebecca

I don’t know why this whole thing is so hard for me.  I want Luke; every time he touches me it’s like my whole body is on fire.  He was so amazing today and he makes me feel like he actually cares.  There’s still something in the back of my mind that’s telling me not to jump into this.

My mom developed quite a reputation after my dad left.  She got into drugs and sex, which seemed to spread around the neighborhood pretty quickly.  I had guys all through high school that constantly assumed I would be as easy as she was.  Ever since then, I swore to myself that I would never let myself be used like she did.  I know that Luke doesn’t want to just use me; I can see it in his eyes.  Something just doesn’t feel right, though, and I’m not sure what it is.  I’m not saying that I’m one of those girls who wants to hold out for marriage, but I’m just not ready yet.  As crazy as this is, the fact that he’s okay with waiting for me is only making me want him more.

His smell envelopes me as I climb under the sheets and close my eyes.  I feel like I’m in a dream and will wake up at any moment.  The bed dips and I look over to see Luke climbing in beside me.  He stretches out his arm and smiles at me.  I scoot over, lay my head on his chest and drape my arm around him.  As I’m drifting off to sleep, I pray that something goes right—just once in my life—because I can really get used to having Luke next to me.

*****

This week with Luke has gone by so fast and the fact that he’s leaving today makes me want to cry.  We spent every day together; we’ve gone hiking, fishing, out to dinners, and a bunch of other fun things.  He makes me feel like I’m the only person in the world that matters and is constantly touching me in one way or another.  I already know I’m starting to fall for him and the fact that he’s now going to be thousands of miles away is killing me.

I hear the shower turn off and realize that our time together is just about up.  Wiping my eyes, I try to put on the best “happy” face I can.  I can’t make him feel bad for leaving; I knew all along that he was going to have to leave.  I walk over to the window and look out at the city I grew up in, wishing to be anywhere else so that I don’t have to say goodbye to him.

Luke comes up behind me, wraps his arms around my waist and rests his chin on my shoulder.  I lean back against him and turn my head to give him a kiss.  “You okay, babe?”

Okay? No, I’m not okay. 
I won’t tell him, though; this is his job and he has to go.  “Yeah.”  I give him another kiss and he turns me around to face him.  Lifting me up by my hips and placing me on the windowsill, he moves in between my legs.  The sexual tension between us all week has been almost unbearable.  Can I really handle doing this with him now just to say goodbye to him?  I know I’ll regret it if I let him slip through my fingertips.  The way that he’s kissing me right now makes me want to throw all my fears out the window and surrender myself to him.  Just as I’m about to tell him I’m ready he pulls away and says the last thing I ever expected him to.

“Come with me.”  My mouth drops open and all I can do is stare at him. 
Is he really serious?!
Can I leave town and go on tour with someone I’ve only known for a week?  “Becca, before you say no, please just think about it.  I know you’ve felt something between us this week…stay with me.  Give us a chance and let’s see where this thing takes us.  I swear that if you aren’t happy, I won’t make you stay and I’ll even help you get back home, as much as I know I won’t want to.”  He grabs my face with both of his hands and crushes his mouth to mine.  I can feel the desperation and need in his kiss.

When he pulls back again, I look into his eyes.  I’m lost.  I know this is too fast, and that we barely know each other but I really don’t care.  “Okay.”

He grabs me and pulls me into his arms, and instinctively, I wrap my legs around his waist.  “Are you sure?”

I nod my head.  “Yes, I’m sure.”  He’s spinning me around in a circle, and when he bumps into the bed, we fall onto it.  Now I’m sitting on top of him—straddling him—and wondering what I’ve just gotten myself into.  Then something hit me, I never told him the truth about my family.  I can’t leave with him without him knowing.  He must have noticed the change in my expression, because now he looks concerned.

“What’s wrong?”

Can I really tell him about the mess of a life that I’ve been living?  Will he want to meet my mom?  I don’t
want
to tell him, but at the same time I can’t leave with him believing a lie.  I climb off of him and sit on the bed.  “Luke, I need to tell you something and I don’t know if you’re going to want me to come with you I tell you.”

He sits up and lifts my face so that I’m looking at him.  “What’s going on?”

I stand up, not wanting to be so close to him when I tell him that I lied about who I am.  “My last name isn’t Carmichael and Jen isn’t my sister.  We’re just really good friends and where you picked me up really isn’t my house.  I didn’t plan on lying to you, but on our first date you called me Rebecca Carmichael, and if I’m being honest, I’ve always wished I was a part of Jen’s family.  The truth is, my dad left my mom when I was younger, and he died in a car accident soon after he left.  My mom hasn’t really been around much since then.  At least not mentally.  I didn’t want you to pick me up at my house because I was embarrassed and I wanted to pretend for that night that I was a different person.”  I take a deep breath, realizing I just rushed through all of that without breathing.  “I would’ve told you sooner, but I didn’t know how you would react.  I know I shouldn’t have lied to you and I’m sorry.”

I look back at him and he’s watching me with a look I never wanted from anyone…pity.  He walks over to me, the whole time never taking his eyes off of me.  “Why didn’t you just tell me that night?”

“I’m not sure, I mean, as far as I knew you weren’t going to be staying in town and I guess I just wanted to pretend I was a part of a normal family for once.”

“Is there anything else?”

Just the fact that I think I’m falling in love with you and if you leave me now I’m not sure what I’ll do.
  I shake my head no, not trusting my voice.

He grabs my hand and pulls me closer to him so I’m standing right in front of him.  “I’m not going to say that I like that you lied, but I understand why you did it.  I just need you to know, Becca, that if there is anything else you need to tell me, tell me now, because lying is just something that I can’t deal with.  I’ve been burnt by it too many times in the past.”

“That’s the only thing, Luke, I promise, and I really am so sorry.  I just got lost in us all week and completely forgot about it until you asked me to leave with you.  If you don’t want me to go with you anymore, I completely understand why.”

I close my eyes, praying that he still wants me to stay with him.  When I feel his lips touch mine, I relax and wrap my arms around him.

“The flight leaves at two; how much time do you need?”

The smile on my face is so big that I think my cheeks might crack.  “Um, I’ll text Jen and see if she can start getting some stuff together for me.”

Me: So Luke, asked me to go on tour with him…

Jen: OMFG! I knew that boy was hooked! I can’t believe this shit right now!

Me: Are you out? Is there any way you can stop by the house and grab some of my stuff?

Jen: Of course! I’ll meet you at my house in like an hour
, bitch!

“Jen’s going to start putting some of my stuff together.”

He looks up at me and smiles.  “Okay, babe.  I just got a text from Mike asking if I can Skype with him and my agent to go over a couple of things and I need to get some other things straightened out.  Will you be okay just taking the car to get your stuff from Jen?  I should be ready when you’re done.  If you want me to go with you, though, I will.”

“No, it’s fine; I’ll call Jen and see if she can pick me up.”

“No.”  He stands up and grabs his keys from the dresser.  “Just take my car.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, don’t worry about it.  Now go and get your stuff so you can get back here.”  He smacks my butt and leans down to kiss me.

I take my phone out to text Jen as I’m walking down to the car.

Me: Hey Luke let me borrow his car. I’m heading over to your house now.

Jen: Kk I stopped by your house and got some clothes. BTW Wyatt is super creepy.

Me: Ugh! He is still there?

Jen: Yes! Ewe! See you soon mama!

The whole drive to Jen’s I feel like I’m just waiting to wake up.  I can’t believe that this is all really happening to me.  When I get there and go up to her room I see two huge suitcases on her bed and she’s randomly throwing different things from her closets into them.  “Hey, what are you doing?  I don’t have nearly enough clothes to fit in those, and unless you’re planning on being a stowaway, I don’t need half of your room.”

She starts laughing and then looks at me.  “If you thought I was sending you on tour for the summer with that rock god in your goodwill wardrobe, you’re even crazier than I thought.  I got anything that was presentable from your house, and I’m filling in the rest of the lines.  Half of this stuff I don’t even wear so don’t start getting all humble and saying you can’t take it.”

I walk over to her and give her a hug; I really don’t know what I would do without her sometimes.  “Thank you.”

“Thank the Lord that you are not fighting me on this; I was ready for a brawl!  Now, while I’m packing the rest of this stuff, I want to know everything.”

I sit down on the bed and start to tell her about the most amazing week I’ve ever had in my life.