Lily stood and pulled Kendall into her arms. Kendall just
stood there with her arms at her sides. She didn’t want her mother’s comfort.
What she needed to do was figure out a plan. Kendall slipped away from her
mother and picked up her cell.
“I have a friend in Utah. I should call her. See if the
offer still stands to come out there and live.”
“Kendall, you’re not making any sense. Our friends are here.
Why would we leave? Why don’t you just call Shane and ask him?”
“I’ll talk to him when he comes ho—when he gets back
tomorrow.”
“There are a million reasons to do an appraisal. You can’t
make assumptions.”
“The property is worth
more than this entire operation, so you’re damn right I want to sell. I will be
selling.”
Kendall stopped, meeting her mother’s gaze. “Because he said
it. I just didn’t choose to believe him.”
“Are you sure?”
How many times had that same line screamed in her head
today?
“The property is worth
more than this entire operation, so you’re damn right I want to sell. I will be
selling.”
“I can’t be here. I don’t know how you stayed here after
Lawrence left. How could you stand to be in the same places, see the same spots
after loving him?” She slapped her hands over her mouth and saw the stricken
look on her mother’s face. “I’m sorry, Mom. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to say
that.”
Lily blinked back a sheen of tears and sank onto the couch.
“Because I loved your father more than he loved me. I didn’t have those kinds
of memories. I made a home for Larry and tried to make this house perfect so he
wouldn’t leave. I held on to him so tightly that I drove him away.”
Kendall pushed away her own pain and locked it into a box.
She was good at stuffing her emotions in boxes when she needed to. She sat next
to her mother and curled an arm around her shoulders.
“You never ask about Lawrence, so I just never talk about
him.” Lily’s voice broke.
“Anytime I asked when I was little, you would cry. I hated
to see you cry.” She pressed her cheek to her mother’s. The familiar scent of
lavender and vanilla closed around her.
“Knowing a man doesn’t love you back is the worst feeling in
the world.”
Her mother’s whispered statement left Kendall raw. She had
to agree. Funny how the next generation of Justice would shred the heart of yet
another Proctor. Evidently the men were kryptonite to Proctor women.
“I knew he was seeing someone. I felt him pulling away from
me when you were really little. He stayed for you, you know. I got five years
with Larry because you were the light of his life.”
Kendall’s eyes burned. “Then why did he leave me without a
backward glance? Why did he leave us?”
“He fell in love with Shane’s mother. I didn’t know her
name, but from what I pieced together, it had to be her. I broke them up, you
know? For two years he tried to stay here, and I naively thought having his
baby would be enough of a hold. I even tried to have another one, but he was
careful. I told him that if he left, he’d have to leave you too. I don’t even
recognize the woman I was then. I’d have done anything to get him to stay.”
“Oh, Mom.” Kendall looked down as the first drops of tears
splashed against her hand. Lily had loved her father so much. Maybe too much.
“I’m sorry I took him away from you too. Part of our problem
had always been how prideful Larry and I both were. Even when I wanted to let
you back into his life. When I got over my own stupidity and contacted him, it
was too late.”
“He didn’t want me?” Kendall’s chest ached. How much was one
fragile organ supposed to take in one day?
“No, honey. He did, but his wife got sick. He had to worry
about her, and time just slid by. We both agreed that it was best to leave well
enough alone.”
He’d actually wanted her? Kendall stood. All this time she’d
thought her father had simply walked away. “You made the decision for me? Don’t
you think I should have been in on that kind of discussion?”
“You didn’t want to talk about him. I thought I was doing
the right thing.”
Kendall pushed her hair back. She searched for anger, for
regret, but she couldn’t find either. Her mother had made a good life for her.
A few conversations she and Shane had on the road trip finally made sense. Her
father still had chosen Shane’s mother over his own daughter. But if Lily was
telling the truth, she hadn’t given Lawrence much choice in the matter.
She tried to reconcile the desperate and unreasonable woman
her mother described and the mother she’d known all her life. Lily was bright
and warm and sweet to everyone she met, but she rarely interacted with men.
Kendall dashed away tears. “I understand. I wish you had found someone else
instead of pining for Lawrence.”
“I loved him. I didn’t want anyone else.”
She folded her arms over her aching stomach. She could
understand not wanting to love again. Who would ever want to feel this way?
How could she be so wrong about Shane?
She was tired of asking the same questions to her broken
heart and muddled brain.
“Why don’t we watch a movie, huh? Something with lots of
violence and not a love story in sight.”
Her mother looked up at her. “You look exhausted, honey. Why
don’t you go up to bed?”
“Because I’ll stare at the ceiling all night. At least if I
watch bad guys blow up stuff, then I’m not thinking about… Well, I’m just not
thinking.”
Lily sighed. “How about
The
Expendables
?”
“Perfect.”
SHANE CRAWLED HIS way up the winding road, his teeth jarring
with each dip in the gravel. Ice coated every surface as far as the eye could
see. The sun glared up off the molten snow encasement, giving him a headache.
He’d left Connecticut early that morning, but the only reason he’d made it was
because of the brand-new chains on his tires.
A good tip from his customer. Parts of California had snow,
but nothing like the Northeast.
He frowned at Kendall’s missing Outback. He knew she was a
skilled driver in these conditions, but no one should be on the road. The town
had been buttoned down tight with only the plows and salt trucks hacking out a
path in the deep freeze.
He gathered the paperwork he’d picked up on his way out of
town: loan applications and interest rate information from three different
banks, a New York license as a preemptive strike to establish residency, and a
list of ideas for renovations.
Everything he’d need to talk to Kendall about refinancing
and expanding the Heron.
Sitting with her on the dock, looking out over the water
with its flawless stillness had been a defining moment. Having her settle
against him had allowed him to finally quiet his mind against all the questions
he’d had about running the Heron with her.
Making love with her in her tiny bedroom and seeing the love
there just waiting for him had been the start of it. He knew that now, but that
moment on the water on New Year’s Day had cemented everything.
She was what he needed. It had always been Kendall. From the
will reading to the endless stretch of miles leading him here, one thing had
been a constant. Kendall and her optimistic smile, her warmth, and the unending
passion between them—all of it was everything he’d ever wanted.
And now he had the Heron that he could share with her and
grow with her.
Hell, he was going to marry her. If it took two days or two
years, he’d convince her that forever was the only option.
He climbed the steps, letting himself inside. Boxes for
ornaments sat around the tree in the living room. He followed the clatter of
dishes into the kitchen. Lily sat at the table wrapping Christmas dishes.
“Hi, Lily. Where’s Kendall?”
Lily didn’t say a word, just wrapped the next dish, placing
it in the box at her feet.
He stood in front of her. “Lily.”
She looked up at him, her dark eyes flat and angry. “She’s
gone to Bells’s place.”
“Oh. In this?” Puzzled, he felt the short hairs of his nape
rise in alarm.
“She needed to get away from here for a little while.”
“Why?”
“Because she needed to think. She has plans to make too.
You’re not the only one who has to think about the future.”
At a loss, Shane rubbed the back of his head. “I know that.”
“Really? Do you? I almost hope you’re just oblivious,
because if you hurt my daughter on purpose with that stunt yesterday, then I
might be the one tying a rock around
your
chest and throwing you into the lake.”
“Wait, what?”
“Your Mr. Clark came by yesterday.”
“My Mr. Clark?”
“The appraiser?”
The alarm bells got louder. “Fuck.” At her glare, he winced.
“Sorry, Lily. He wasn’t supposed to be here until next week. I was supposed to
have time to talk to her about that.”
“About what? Would it hurt less if you actually manned up
and told her you were still serious about selling the Heron out from under us?
Maybe.”
Surprised at her venom, he lifted the papers in his hand.
“No. I’m not selling.”
Lily stood up. “Then why on earth would you have an
appraiser out? What are those, real estate papers?”
“Loan papers. I was going to talk to Kendall about
refinancing this place and putting on an addition.” He looked down at his
future mother-in-law with her curling coffee-colored hair and Kendall’s dark
eyes. “I wanted to talk to her about a place separate from the B and B for us.
I want her to have a real bedroom, not a closet.”
“Oh.” Her eyes welled up. “I told her to wait, to try not to
jump to conclusions.” Lily stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his
waist. “I knew you wouldn’t break her heart.”
Shane kissed the top of her head. The pretty floral scent
that was always a part of Lily calmed a few of his jangling nerves. “I love
her.”
“I know you do. Anyone can see it. Well, anyone but
Kendall.”
“I’m not really good at saying it.”
“You’re really good at showing it. The rest will catch up. I
hate that Kendall has such a tiny place to sleep, but she wanted to use all the
bedrooms for rental space.”
“I understand. That’s why I want to build off the barn. Make
a separate space for her. Maybe an in-law apartment for you.”
Lily dabbed at her eyes but finally shook her head. “I have
a perfect room at the back of the house that I love. But a separate space for
you two and maybe room for grandbabies? I’d be all over that.”
The breath in his lungs stalled. A little sunshine-haired
girl that looked like Kendall? What a terrifying and amazing thought. “Let’s
worry about babies after I convince her I’m not going anywhere.”
“Well, go get her.” Lily went back to the table and ripped a
piece of the white craft paper and scribbled on it. “That’s Bells’s address.”
He leaned down and planted a kiss on Lily’s cheek. “Thanks.”
“Be careful out there!”
He waved back at her and rushed through the door only to
slip his way into the railing. Taking a steadying breath, he threw out another
scoop of rock salt from the fat planter Kendall hid the bucket in.
He peeled down the driveway, fishtailing once before the
chains on his tires gripped the icy road. The bend sparkled with fresh ice.
Suddenly he spotted her green Outback inching up Heron Way.
Not taking any chances, Shane yanked on his wheel and
blocked off the road. He got out and went around, leaned on his truck door, his
arms crossed.
She held up her hand against the glare of the sun on snow
and slowed to a stop. She opened her door. “Did you get into an accident? Or
are you just insane?”
“I was coming after you.”
She skidded over to him, her chin raised; a ridiculous
purple knit hat sat slightly crooked on her head. “Why? So you can actually
tell me to my face that you want to sell the Heron? I would have appreciated
knowing before the appraiser came and made me look like a jerk. I thought—”
“I love you, Kendall.”
“What?”
With his plan shot to hell, all he could focus on was making
sure she knew just how wrong she was. “I love you. I don’t want to sell the
Heron.”
“You…” Her huge brown eyes were filled with confusion.
“How?”
He opened the passenger side door and gathered the papers
he’d thrown back into the truck. He slid over to her, pushing the loan
documents at her. A few papers fell to the ground.
She bent to retrieve one, but he pulled her back up. “I was
going to surprise you tonight. Mr. Clark wasn’t supposed to be here until next
week, and we were both going to talk to him. I don’t want to sell. I want to
build.”
She looked down at the stack of papers. Then back up at him,
then again at the brochures. She quietly leafed through them. “You don’t want
to sell.” She stopped, a fan of pamphlets clutched against her chest. “Wait.
Did you say you loved me?”
He took the pile and shoved it back in the truck. “I love you,
Kendall. I think I’ve loved you since the first time you boosted yourself out
of the window of my truck to look at the damn mountains.”
She fisted her hands at her sides, then skidded into him
full tilt, slamming him into the truck. The door clomped shut, and then it was
her mouth on his chin, her mittened hands tugging at his coat until he lowered
to find her mouth with his.
He slid his hand into her hair, flipping off her hat until
her curls twined around his fingers and wrist. Until she was in his arms and
not going anywhere. Until he could breathe in her apple scent and he knew she
was his.
She slugged him in the gut. “You’ve loved me since
California, and you’re only telling me now?”
He tipped his head back and laughed. “I just figured it out
two days ago.”
“On the dock?”
He cupped her cheek. “On the dock. I think we should get
married on that dock.”