Tainted (5 page)

The driver opened the door and waited as we all exited the car. Then, he led us up the steps and into the lobby. From the pristine marble floors to the glass reception desk, the place screamed money. We walked down a short hallway to a row of elevators. As soon as the doors opened, the driver ushered us in before he stepped inside. The doors closed, and he pressed the button for the eighteenth floor. I stared at my reflection in the door as we were lifted up.

My hands were sweating from nerves, and I wiped them repeatedly on my jeans. I wasn’t one to get nervous, but my future depended on the decisions of the people working in this building. We would either be set for life or thrown out like trash.

The elevator dinged, and the doors slid open to reveal a brightly lit hallway. The driver, who had yet to speak to any of us except for Eric at the airport, led us down the hallway to a door at the very end. After knocking loudly, he swung the door open and walked in with us following right behind him.

“Mr. Sanders, I have the band you requested,” he said in a deep voice that matched his scary-as-fuck appearance.

I took a closer look at him and frowned. If I saw this guy on the street, I would have gone out of my way to avoid him. Even though he was dressed in a suit, I could see tattoos peeking out of the collar and sleeves of his shirt. His head was shaved, and with the added benefit of him being well over six feet tall, he was one scary bastard.

“Excellent! Thank you for your assistance, Alex. I’ll take it from here,” a voice said from across the room.

I looked up to see a middle-aged man sitting at a desk. He was the exact opposite of Alex. He was also dressed in a suit, but that was the only similarity between the two men. Desk guy had a small build with thinning hair and wrinkles around his eyes and across his forehead.

“It’s a pleasure to meet all of you. We loved the demo tape you sent, and I personally can’t wait to hear what you can do in our studio.”

“Uh, thank you, Mr.—” Eric started.

“Oh, of course. How silly of me. I’m Brad Sanders. I spoke with you on the phone the other day.”

“Right, well, it’s nice to officially meet you, Mr. Sanders,” Eric said.

“The pleasure is all mine. Please call me Brad. We will be spending a good bit of time with each other, so there’s no need for formalities.” He smiled at us.

“All right then. I’m Eric. This is Adam, Jade, and Drake.”

Brad stood, walked over to us, and shook each of our hands. He seemed like a nice guy, but I wasn’t one to trust others, and I refused to fall for the nice-guy act. Guys like him used bands all the time. Until he could prove to me that he wasn’t a dick, I wasn’t ready to like him. Sure, I had to be polite, but that didn’t mean I had to like it.

“Why don’t all of you take a seat? Then, I’ll go over some things with you. I’m sure Eric filled you in on the phone conversation we had a couple of days ago.”

We all nodded as we took the seats surrounding the desk.

“Good. All right, let’s get down to business. As I said before, we absolutely loved your demo. You all have amazing potential, and with our help, I think your band could be the next big thing in the rock world. We want you to record a few of your current songs in our studio, and we’ll see how things go. If you’re as good as you sounded on the CD you sent in, we’ll want to sign you.”

“And if you don’t?” I asked, wanting to make him squirm.

He gave me a false cheery smile. “Don’t think we are just going to abandon you. I have no doubt that you have raw potential. In the end, if we can’t come to an agreement, I will personally pay for your trip home.”

I nodded, satisfied with his answer.

“While you are here, we have booked rooms for each of you in a hotel not far from here, so you are easily accessible to us. By now, I’m sure you know that recording music is not easy, even recording on your own. You will spend several hours a day in our studio, working with the best team money can buy.”

“And you guys are paying for our rooms and making sure we have everything we need?” Adam asked.

“Of course! We asked you to come here. You won’t need to spend a dime while you’re here.”

“Fucking sweet!” Adam said.

Brad laughed as Jade rolled her eyes.

“Yes, it is a very sweet deal. I’m sure you’re all tired, so I don’t expect you to jump right into the studio today. Alex will take you to the hotel, and he will pick you up at eight o’clock sharp tomorrow morning. Get a good night’s rest. Tomorrow we get to work.”

We all stood, thanked him, and walked to the door. Alex was standing just down the hallway, waiting for us. We followed him back to the elevators, and once we were back on the first floor, we headed outside and got back into the limo. The ride to the hotel was short since it was only a few blocks away from the label. It seemed they really did want to keep us close.

Alex parked the limo, and almost instantly, he opened the door for us to exit. He helped the hotel staff unload our bags from the back of the car. Afterward, he turned to us. “Your rooms are listed under your names.” He handed Eric a piece of paper. “If you need anything, this is my number. I will see you all in the morning.” With that, he stepped away from us and got back into the limo.

That guy had the personality of a gnat. I wasn’t sure if he was an arrogant ass by nature or if he just didn’t like us. Either way, I didn’t like him.

We walked inside, and I instantly felt uncomfortable. The hotel was as fancy as the building we had just left. I wasn’t used to high-class places, and this place was as high-class as they came. At the reception desk, we checked in and got directions to our rooms. We rode the elevator up with a hotel employee and helped him unload our bags outside each of our rooms. I tipped him twenty dollars, and he looked at me like I was nuts. I shrugged as I glanced at Adam as the employee walked down the hallway. I’d seriously overpaid or underpaid the guy. Oh well, I didn’t give a shit either way.

We agreed to meet later in Eric’s room after we each went to our own rooms to unpack. I slid my key card into the lock and swung the door open to reveal a massive room. While I knew it couldn’t be the nicest room in this hotel, it was insane to me. Any hotel I’d slept in before came with a bed and a bathroom only, but this place had it all—a bed, bathroom, couch, desk, and even a small kitchen. The label had obviously planned to keep us here for a while. Too bad I couldn’t cook to save my life. If Chloe were here, she’d be jumping up and down in excitement.

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block thoughts of her from my mind. It wasn’t fair. No matter where I was or what I was doing, she was always there. Every single thing I saw reminded me of her.

I threw my bag on the bed and unzipped it to start putting things away in the dresser across from the bed. I honestly hadn’t expected to be here for long, so I’d only brought enough clothes for a week. I hoped a Laundromat was close by or maybe the hotel had some service to wash my clothes. After I put all my clothes away, I took my toiletries to the bathroom and tossed my empty bag against the far wall.

Well, it wasn’t completely empty. There was one small compartment that I hadn’t yet opened. Just in case, I’d stashed a bag of coke in there. I’d taken a chance with airport security when we were still in Pittsburgh, and lucky for me, we had skipped through security since we were on a private plane. Now, I wished that I hadn’t brought it with me. I sat down on the bed and stared at my bag. It seemed like the coke was calling out to me, begging me to get my fix.

I fell back onto the bed and stared at the ceiling. I wished that Chloe were here with me.

With her, maybe it would be easier to ignore the screaming voice in my head.
To hell with the rest of the world. Do what you want.

Maybe if she’d stuck by me, I’d be clean by now. Yeah, I knew I would be. It was all her fault that I was still trapped in this hell. If she’d really cared, she would have stayed to make sure I was okay. Instead, she’d left me behind without a second thought. She didn’t care about me. The only person she cared about was herself. Needing to hit something, I slammed my fists on the bed. It did little to soothe my temper. Instead, I felt angrier. How could she do that to me? She had left me, just left me. I fucking hated her, and I hated the fact that I still loved her. Damn her! Damn it all!

I stood up and stomped across the room to my bag. I sat it on the desk and unzipped the compartment that had all the answers. I was so sick of dealing with my fucked up emotions all the time. I just wanted that release, that world of pleasure where nothing mattered. There was no label, there was no Chloe, there were no dead parents, and most importantly, there was no pain. Fuck it all. No, fuck
them
all.

I pulled the bag and my trusty mirror out and walked to the couch to sit down. I’d stocked up only a few days ago, and I knew I had enough to last me a week or two. I set the mirror on the table and dumped some of the powder onto it. After pulling my credit card and a bill out of my wallet, I crushed up the coke and separated it into two lines. I rolled the bill and leaned down, but then I stopped at the last second. Was I really giving up this soon? Hadn’t I just decided last night that I was done with this? I was destroying everything for myself and everyone around me.

I stared down at the powder and willed myself to take it to the bathroom and flush it down the toilet. But I couldn’t do it. I needed it too much. I couldn’t deal with life without some kind of release, and this was the best thing that I had right now. I lowered my head once again and snorted both of the lines, one right after the other. I threw the bill down on the table as I leaned back against the couch. I felt half-disgusted with myself and half-happy now that I knew my release was so close.

I closed my eyes and waited for the effects to take over. A few minutes later, I started to feel them, and I breathed a sigh of relief. Yes, this was what I wanted, what I needed. I could handle this. I wouldn’t let it control me. The guys and Jade were worried over nothing. How could something that felt this good ever be bad? It helped me focus, which is what I needed. When I didn’t have it, I always felt rage bubbling to the surface, and I lost control. That would be when everyone needed to worry, not when I felt like this.

I smiled to myself as I stood and grabbed my key card off the table. It was time to meet up with everyone in Eric’s room. I closed the door behind me and walked down the hall to his room. I knocked, and a few seconds later, Eric opened the door to let me in.

He took one look at me and shook his head. “Really?” he asked.

“What?”

“You’re high, Drake. I thought you were trying to work on it.”

“I am,” I said defensively. “This is the first time today. That’s almost twenty-four hours. I don’t know what you’re so worried about anyway. You hate when I get all pissed off, don’t you? I never feel that way after I’ve snorted a line.”

“No, but you’re a raging dick when it starts to wear off,” Adam said from the couch.

I flipped him off as I sat down next to him. “Fuck you. I’m fine, and I’m not using as much as I was. At least I’m trying, so back off.”

“Whatever,” Adam growled. “I wish Chloe were here. She’d rip off your dick for this shit.”

For the first time ever, I snapped while I was high. I grabbed the neck of his shirt and drew my arm back to punch him in the face.

Eric grabbed my arm and pulled me away from Adam. “That’s it!” he shouted.

I froze. Eric never shouted.

“You need to get your shit together, or you’re going to be on your own. I can’t watch you destroy yourself and attack us every chance you get,” Eric said.

Adam adjusted his shirt and stood. “If it wasn’t for this label wanting us, I’d vote to kick your ass out right now. I’m so sick of it.”

“Don’t you ever fucking bring up Chloe like that again! She left me, just like you guys want to. If she were still here, I wouldn’t be in this mess!”

“So, you admit that you’re in over your head?” Eric asked.

“What? No! I just meant—”

“We know what you meant. Deny it all you want, but you need help,” Adam said as he walked to the door. He glanced back at Eric. “I’m out of here before I beat his head in.”

He slammed the door, leaving me alone with Eric. I ran my hands through my hair. I was at a loss for words. I had this under control, regardless of what they thought.

“You’ve lost control, Drake. I wish you could see that. You’re like a brother to me. As far as I’m concerned, you
are
my brother and it’s killing me to watch you go through this alone. I wish you would let us help you,” Eric said.

“I don’t need your help or anyone else’s. I’ve taken care of myself my entire life, and that isn’t going to change.”

“But you’re not alone, and I wish you could see that. Jade, Adam, and I all love you. Chloe does, too, even if she isn’t here to tell you.”

“You guys are my family, and I know you care, but you’re worrying over nothing. I wish you’d just leave me alone.”

“We aren’t going to leave you alone until you get help. You’ve got Jade scared to death. She’s afraid to even leave you on your own. A little bit ago, she came over here, and she was freaking out and worried about what you would do since you have a room to yourself.” He gave me a pointed look. “Obviously, she was right.”

“I’m not dealing with this right now. I’m going back to my room.” I stood and walked to the door. I was so sick of this shit. I wanted my friends back, not these crazy people who wouldn’t leave me alone.

I spent the rest of the night locked up in my room. Someone came to my door and knocked a few times. After hearing obscenities being shouted at me from the other side, I knew it was Jade, but I ignored her. She tried calling me a few times, but I ignored those as well. I just wanted to be alone.

It was well after midnight when I picked up my phone and started flipping through some of my pictures. I started with the first picture I had ever taken of Chloe and continued to go through them until I reached the last one. It had been taken only days before she’d left me. She had fallen asleep while we were on the bus, and I’d snapped picture after picture of her as she slept peacefully in my bunk. I’d thought that we’d be together forever, but as usual, things never worked out the way I’d planned. If I had known that she would be gone so soon after that, I would have crawled into that small bunk and held her tight.