Talk Nerdy to Me (39 page)

"But isn't Manny on
your payroll?"

"Ah,
it doesn't matter. Mom and Aunt Rose can use the extra help. I can spare Manny,
considering that I didn't anticipate spending much time on the scouting end of
the trip. It was mostly a good excuse to see the family."

Charlie
had been looking for an opening like this. The closer he got to leaving town,
the more he'd begun to think it would be great if Rick would relocate to the
East Coast, just so one of them was closer to the two widows. As successful as
Rick was, it wouldn't be that tough for him to establish a New York office.

"Speaking
of family," he said, "Aunt Myrtle isn't getting any younger."

"I
don't know about that. She seems a lot more cheerful than she did when my dad
was alive."

"Well,
sure, she's cheerful, but she's getting on in years."

"Are
you kidding? She'll outlive us all. If she could survive my dad, she'll survive
anything. I'm not worried about her."

Charlie
took off his glasses and massaged the bridge of his nose. He would go to Nevada
in any case, but lately he'd been thinking that it might be good to have Rick
around to keep an eye on things. "Have you ever thought about moving your
operation to New York? I'm going to be living in Nevada soon, and—"

"Now
I get your point. Listen, they don't need me around. They're making it fine.
Look at the way they've built this business."

"I
just think it would be nice for one of us to be reasonably close."

"You
know what? I've been back here for a few days, now, and I think they could get
along just fine if neither of us happened to be here. Sure, they'd miss you as
a person and they'd miss the ever-available handyman you've been for them. But
they'd be okay. In fact..." Rick tapped his finger against his empty
coffee mug. "They might be better off, in the long run."

"Better off?
How?"

'Think about it. There are
a few retired widowers living
in Middlesex. I'll bet
some of them know how to fix things. But with you always around, there was no
reason to call those guys, was there?"

Charlie
groaned. "Are you accusing me of standing between my mother and
romance?"

"I'm
just trying to get you to look at things from a different angle." Rick
consulted his watch. "Hey, if I'm going to make any progress at all with
Denise, we need to get going."

"Rick, she is so not
your type."

"Every
woman on the planet is my type." Rick pushed back his chair and stood.
"Prepare to watch a master at work."

"Okay,
let's go." Charlie had come to the conclusion that it might be fun to see
how Rick dealt with someone like Denise. But even better than that was the
distraction Rick could create. Charlie and Eve actually might have some time
alone. That was something to get excited about.

"But first I have to
take another leak."

"But you just—-"

"I
know, I know, I have a bladder the size of a thimble, dude."

Somehow
Eve was able to drag Denise away from the Pastry Parlor and
Manny, When it looked as if Denise would never leave, Eve hit her with a
double-barreled assault on her sense of responsibility—the washing machine
repair she'd scheduled and the navy slacks that were in desperate need of
washing.

They
ate
Cock Rings and Booby Buns
on the way
home,
and Denise was so busy
talking about Manny
and
his
assets, both monetary and physical, that she didn't complain about ingesting
all those sugary carbs. In
fact,
she
seemed to be enjoying every bite.

"Talk
about hot buns!" Denise said as she polished off a Cock Ring. "If
those women really
wanted
to
make money, they'd hire Manny, wearing those tight
jeans
of his, to
walk
around
the shop offering samples on a tray."

Eve
smiled.
"Cute Idea. They
should name the
bakery
Hot
Buns."

Denise
turned to her, her eyes wide. "Exactly! That
's
exactly
what they should call it. Brilliant idea, Eve! I'll tell Manny
about
it. He and I agreed that the bakery should franchise, and he
said he'd like a piece of the action." Denise fanned herself. "When
he said that, I almost had an orgasm."

Eve
was still savoring the fact that Denise had called her brilliant. "So
aren't you glad we made the trip?"

"You
know it, girl. Manny and I, we, umm, are getting together for dinner tonight.
To talk about his investment strategy."

"Really?"
Eve saw all kinds of advantages to that program. If Denise left, then she and
Charlie could be alone.

Denise
glanced sideways at Eve. "Unless that's a problem."

"No!
No problem at all. I'm sure Manny is eager to make use of your…
expertise."

"Oh,
God, Eve, he's such & stud. I don't know if I can handle him."

Eve
was shocked that Denise would admit that she was feeling vulnerable about
anything. "You'll be fine."

"I don't have anything
to wear."

Eve thought quickly.
"I can fix you up. I have a soft red sweater with a low-cut V-neck. It
would go with those slacks you have on. And you can borrow a pair of my hooker
shoes and some jewelry. We can make this work."

"Thank
you." Denise licked powdered sugar from her fingers. "You know about
these things. I never paid attention to clothes."

"Leave
it to me. You'll look really hot." Eve was delighted with the personality
change in Denise. She decided not to mention that Manny would be leaving for
California next week. Maybe a fling was exactly what Denise needed to feel
better about herself.

And
maybe then, she'd forget about sabotaging the hovercraft.
Eve
didn't want to believe Denise would do such a thing, but if she was the guilty
party, a hot romance might be just the thing to sidetrack her efforts.

They
made it back minutes ahead of the repairman, whose name turned out to be Gus.
Denise shooed Eve away. "Go design a bumper for that hovermobile,"
she said. "This is what I do best."

"Hovercraft."
Eve wasn't about to go away. She'd prepared her response to the inevitable
reaction when Gus opened the washing machine. So she pretended that she was
going into the garage, but instead she lingered in the kitchen.

Right
on schedule, Denise shrieked in horror.
"Eve!
Come
quickl
Someone's vandalized your
washing machine!"

Eve
hurried down the hall to her bathroom. "My washing machine?" she
said, making sure to inject the right amount of surprise and concern. "Why
would someone vandalize a washing machine?"

Gus
looked up his Bassett-hound face telegraphing bad news. "In my line of
work I see all kinds, but whoever did this is really sick. Personally, I'd say
they belong in an Institution."

"Brace
yourself," Denise said. "It's unbelievably disgusting."

Eve
approached and leaned over to look into the washer. The smell of wet newsprint
and mildew mingled with the overly sweet smell of cheap chocolate mixed with
the soap she'd poured in. The contents of the washer were no longer easily
identifiable, and the chocolate had melted and mixed with the water until the
entire mess was the color of grayish mud.

Eve
made herself gasp in disbelief. "My God! This is the work of a
maniac!"

Denise
sighed. "I have to agree. I can't imagine what kind of person would dream
up something this diabolical." She glanced at Gus. "Can this washer
be saved?"

"Hard
to say." Gus shook his head. "No telling if this stuff has any
corrosive properties. It could have started eating through the basket. By now
it could be in the motor. I won't know until I get in there." He squared
his shoulders as if preparing for battle. "I should probably call in the
HazMat team."

Eve
couldn't have that. She was on the verge of telling him what was in the washer.

"But
I won't." A gleam of anticipation shone in his eyes. "I'm going to
handle this myself, ladies. Stand back. I need to get more equipment from my
truck."

Eve
and Denise moved aside to let him walk out of the bathroom.

At
the doorway, he tamed back. "I'd advise both of you to clear the area. You
might want to vacate the house."

"I'm
willing to risk staying," Eve said. "I have work to do." As if
on cue, her kitchen phone rang. She'd been expecting Charlie to call, and she
needed to clue him in so he wouldn't reveal his part in the washing machine mess.
"Denise, do you feel okay about keeping an eye on the washer?"

"Sure,
but if anything crawls out of there, I'm leaving." "Right." Eve
ran for the phone and caught it before the answering machine clicked on.
"Hello?" "It's me."

"Hi,
me." Her heart started thumping rapidly. "Where are you?"

"I'm
at the Rack and Bails. Rick and I just finished having lunch. He's in the
bathroom, so I grabbed a chance to call and warn you."

"I
have to warn you, too. Let me have the' first round of warning, okay?"

Charlie laughed. "Go."

"Denise
is convinced some maniac put all that stuff in the washer. I didn't deny
it."

"That's funny."

"Oh,
and she has the hots for Manny. We just got back from the bakery and Manny was
there. She thinks he's yummy."

"Huh.
Very interesting. Okay, here's my warning. I told Rick that Eunice might be
trying to steal your design. And
I
...
also told him Denise might be sabotaging you."

"Charlie,
I
wish you hadn't said
that."

"I
think
we have to consider the possibility."

"I
just can't." At least not out loud. The suspicion lurked in the back of
her mind and she couldn't completely ignore it. "And besides, even if she
is the one, I'm betting she's about to abandon her plan."

"How come?"

"She
and Manny are getting together tonight, supposedly to talk about investments,
but Denise is hoping for more than that. I'm going to help her with clothes and
jewelry so she looks good.
I
mean,
she always looks good, but tonight she wants to look sexy."

"Are you sure you want
Manny dating your sister?"

Eve
knew what he meant. Manny had been high on her list of suspects.
"I
've changed my mind about
him. He's too nice a guy to break into somebody's house and steal things. He's
spending all his free time helping frost cookies for your mom and aunt. That's
endearing."

"Eve,
you don't want to suspect anybody. I admire that, but logically the culprit is
someone you know, someone who's found out about the hovercraft and either
wants to sabotage it or steal the idea."

Eve sighed.
"I
suppose."

"Rick
will be out of the bathroom any minute. Before he gets here I need to tell you
his bonehead solution is to get friendly with your sister so she'll confess. I
tried to talk him out of it, but he—"

"No way," Eve didn't know whether to
laugh or to be
outraged. Fortunately she couldn't imagine
Rick would succeed with Denise. She'd see right through him.

"I
know it won't work," Charlie said. "But then I thought of one
advantage. If he keeps her occupied this afternoon, you and I could be alone to
... um ... work on the hovercraft."