Temptation (A Temptation Novel) (31 page)

I was at least thankful that he didn’t say anything to me as we all walked out, pushed tightly together in the middle of the exiting crowd. Reaching the truck, I quickly crawled in. I sat staring straight ahead while the new gang hung out in the parking lot. I only halfheartedly listened to all the chattering until I heard my name mentioned. I honed in on what Sam was saying in a flash.

“Yeah, sorry, I’d like to go back to your place, Hunter, but I should get Rose home before she starts leaking again.”

“What about the party tomorrow? Do you think your sister will come?” Hunter asked in a much too nosy way.

“Maybe—I’ll see what I can do.” He paused, and I could tell he was thinking, a foreign activity to him. He went on to say, “You know what would be a good idea? Why don’t I pick you and Amber up tomorrow afternoon. I’ll bring Rose, and we’ll go get supper at that little diner on the corner of Route 48 and Maggie Road.”

“Sounds great—call me with the exact time in the morning,” Hunter said brightly to Sam. Then turning away from my brother, he stalked over to the passenger-side window like a hungry lion. He rested his arms in the opening and said, “I’m looking forward to seeing you tomorrow, Rose.”

“Mmm-hmm,” I mumbled, trying to ignore him. Maybe my rudeness would deter him. Grinning at my discomfort, he stared at me for a few seconds, his eyes roaming over my face before turning and hopping into his Blazer. His action signaled the rest of the group to begin dispersing. His self-confidence bugged me. It was as if he expected me to faint at his feet or something absurd like that. Well, I’d show him. He was cute, but he didn’t hold a candle to Noah. Besides, he didn’t make my body go nuts when he came near me.

I had to sit for another few minutes while Sam rammed his tongue down Amber’s throat before she finally left with a few of her girlfriends. He jumped in the truck beside me.

“You’re really disgusting, you know that?” I informed him.

“You should talk. You’ve ruined me forever with the image of you lip-locked with Noah on the bed.” He said it with amusement until he saw that I was crying again.

“Goddamn it, Rose. You’ve got to stop crying every time you hear the guy’s name.” He sounded worried and angry at the same time.

“I can’t help it, Sam—it just hurts so bad. Noah and I were meant to be together and he’s the one I want to be dating, not some jock named Hunter,” I said, flinging my head onto the seat back with a thud.

“If you two were meant to be together, then you would be.” He sighed heavily and continued, trying to be compassionate and failing miserably, “The fact is that the whole thing was screwed up from the beginning. Noah has to marry an Amish girl, probably before he turns twenty. You, on the other hand, are destined to go to college, have a career and eventually meet the guy of your dreams. You’ll get married and have a couple of kids when you’re in your thirties. You can’t mess with Providence, Rose.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Just that your life is still ahead of you and you can’t drastically alter it by becoming Amish, marrying when you’re a teenager and starting to pop out babies immediately. If you did, you’d be seriously messing with the universe.”

“Yeah, I know,” I said weakly.

“Well, if you know, why won’t you just move on?”

“It’s just hard to, that’s…all.” I hiccuped.

“Well, I’m going to make it a lot easier for you. Tomorrow you’re having a very distracting dinner with me, Amber and Hunter. Then you’re going to that party with us and having a buttload of fun. Okay?”

“Okay,” I agreed weakly, feeling as if I’d just sold Noah out.

22

Noah

Seeing Is Believing

WITH BORED INDIFFERENCE,
I sat in the front seat of the work truck, watching the English filling their gas tanks, the same as Mr. Denton was doing now. Lucky for me today, Father had remained home to meet with the mechanic who was supposed to fix up the Bobcat, giving me the opportunity to escape his probing eyes for a while. He’d been extremely supportive since I told him of my breakup with Rose. But aggravating me to no end, the man followed me around closely every minute of each day. I was enjoying the moment of solitude alone in the truck.

It gave me more time to brood about the mess I’d gotten myself into. It had been over a week since my talk with Sarah. Each day that passed, my desire to see Rose again grew to the point of physical pain.

I had it so bad that every time I heard hoofbeats on the pavement in front of the house, I would stop whatever I was doing and anxiously search down the roadway. I’d hold my breath, hoping to see Rose riding Lady in the direction of the gap in the fence and the cornfields. Of course, that never happened. The only other chance I had to possibly see her was when the work truck passed by her house daily. Those times I would peer out the window, careful not to be noticed, for any sight of her. Again to no avail.

I was determined to see her one more time before I made a decision about Ella. It would haunt me forever if I didn’t give Rose a chance to change her mind. But time was running out. Tonight we were once again picnicking with the Weaver family. Only this time it was at their place. I knew the gatherings were purposely being arranged to throw Ella and me together. I sighed in annoyance, running my hand through my hair at the thought.

The air was frustratingly hot, making me wish for the cooler days of autumn. Now that August had arrived, it wouldn’t be too long a wait for summer to fade away. The heat reminded me of Rose, and I didn’t need anything else helping me with that. As it was, I couldn’t eat Mother’s cinnamon rolls any longer. Just looking at them brought images of Rose’s lips to me.

Shaking the vision from my head, I focused my gaze on the little diner attached to the market. The smells wafting from the restaurant were pleasant enough, but I knew from experience that the food smelled better than it tasted.

A green sliver in the corner of my eye caught my attention. I glanced out the window to see a green dually truck pulling into the lot. Swiveling in the seat to get a better view, I saw that sure enough, it was Sam. He had a blonde girl sitting almost on top of him in the front seat. My eyes followed the truck as it pulled up to the diner and parked.

Finally, my chance had arrived to find out how Rose was doing. Gripping the door handle with anticipation spreading through me, I began to step out but stalled for a second after seeing a guy climbing out of the backseat. Must be one of Sam’s football-player friends, I assumed. My thoughts were suddenly rattled by the appearance of a slender bare leg from the doorway of Sam’s truck.

The air caught in my throat and my heart beat wildly in my chest while I waited for her to fully exit the truck. Somehow, instinctively, I knew it was Rose. Then she was out, and for the first time in two weeks, I saw her again. I couldn’t keep my eyes from roaming intensely over her. Immediately, I noticed that she had lost weight, which was impossible to believe since she’d been tiny before. Her skin was paler than I remembered, her coffee-colored hair striking against the fairness of her face.

The other thing that slammed into my sight and caused a ripple of anger to bubble up inside me were the short jean shorts she wore and the pink sleeveless top that hugged her breasts tightly. Granted, her shorts weren’t as skimpy as the blonde girl’s, but still, they were incredibly inappropriate. The shirt didn’t leave much to the imagination either.

Not moving a muscle, and with a sick churning developing in my stomach, I watched her huddled together with the others by the truck. Her face wasn’t smiling and she appeared to be studying the broken pavement at her feet as intensely as I was watching her.

Then, almost in a blur, the group began to move toward the diner. Sam opened the door and his girlfriend slid past him. My body tensed even more. I swallowed down the bile that started to rise in my tight throat when the new guy placed his hand on the center of Rose’s little back and ushered her through the doorway a second later.

He had touched her with an air of familiarity, as if he owned her. And she had let him touch her. She had willingly allowed him to guide her though the door. An icy chill abruptly cooled me in the sweltering heat. I gazed at the sky to see dark, ominous clouds building on the horizon.

Yes, Rose had always been willing when it came to touching and kissing. Now I guessed she was doing those things with the guy that just pushed her through the door. The frosty tentacles filling my body invaded my heart. I sat frozen in place, unable to erase the disgusting image from my mind.

Matthew’s voice sounded distant when it cracked into my stunned mind. I blinked at him just in time to catch the Mountain Dew he tossed me.

“Hey, Noah, guess who we just saw in the diner.”

When I didn’t say anything, he continued loudly, “It was the English girl you dumped. She was with this tall guy.”

I didn’t think he had any idea that what was coming out of his mouth was killing me, but Jacob did. He roughly smacked Matthew on the head open handed and grunted, “Shut up, Matt—you idiot!”

I found my voice, hoping it wouldn’t waver when I said, “Don’t worry about it, Jacob. I don’t care in the least.”

Jacob wasn’t buying it, though, by the way he sympathetically shook his head and sighed loudly. While I was struggling to keep my composure, Mr. Denton climbed into the truck and revved up the loud diesel engine. Slowly he pulled out of the lot and away from Rose.

I had prayed so hard to get to see her, and God had answered my prayers. Now I knew that Rose had moved on. She was already enjoying someone else’s company and there was nothing I could do about it. The sight of that guy’s hand on her back had made my decision about Ella easy for me. Tonight I would ask her parents’ permission to begin courting her.

And I’d never look back.

* * *

Sitting at the end of the table with Matthew beside me, I took the last bite of food, not really tasting it. Everything was about appearances. I had to appear happy enough to be enjoying my dinner and that’s just what I was going to do. Even if I threw it up later.

“Um, about what I said earlier, Noah. I wasn’t really thinking.”

Looking over at him and his anxious chubby face, I decided I had no reason to be angry with him. All he did was say the truth. Yeah, I didn’t want to hear it at the time, but Matthew hadn’t meant anything malicious by it. He’d never been in love. How would he know what it felt like to see the girl who had once been mine with another guy?

“It’s all right. I really have gotten over her,” I said firmly, convincing myself of my words each time I pictured her kissing that guy.

“I heard you were going to ask to court my sister. Is it true?” he whispered cautiously.

“Yeah, I guess that’s the direction I’m heading,” I said with quiet resolve.

“That means we’ll be officially brothers someday,” he said cheerfully.

Seeing how happy he was at the idea, I couldn’t stop the slight smile from creeping onto my mouth. “I guess that’s true, Matthew.”

“Noah?” It was Father’s voice. He had walked to the table with Mr. Weaver close beside him. “Will you please go with Ella to the storeroom to bring a watermelon to the table?” His voice would have sounded innocent enough to anyone else, but I wasn’t fooled.

As if perfectly rehearsed, Ella appeared next to my chair, waiting expectantly for me to join her. Not very subtle, Father, I thought, getting up and proceeding to follow her into the house and down the stairs to the basement.

The storeroom was in the far corner and since we’d eaten outside, the room was empty of any people. An uncomfortable feeling gripped me as I realized that this was the first time I’d ever been completely alone with the girl. Crossing the smooth concrete floor slowly behind her, we entered the small space lined with shelves from the ceiling to the ground, where jars of varying sizes were tightly packed onto the boards, filled with a variety of colorful contents.

The proximity to Ella felt strange to me, but she, on the other hand, seemed to be perfectly okay with the situation when she pivoted around quickly. She openly eyed me up and down with a slight smile on her lips.

I’d never really taken the time to look closely at her before. Now I took the opportunity to examine her. She had a pretty face. That, I already knew, but her eyes were the wrong color and her lips weren’t full enough. Her nose was a little too turned up and I appraised her body, trying to imagine what she was hiding under her thick dark blue dress. From what I could gather, I decided her breasts weren’t full enough, and she was too tall, only a few inches shorter than me. Ella would have been beautiful to any other man, but to me she was just too different from my first love.

I waited for my body to respond to her nearness. Hoping that my heart would beat wildly or that wonderful tingling feeling would begin to surge from my groin. But my insides were quiet, almost…bored.

Bringing my eyes back to hers, she looked at me with a desire that was obvious, and I was suddenly unsure what to do. I never had to think about it when I was with Rose. My body had all the answers with her. It took charge of my brain, making it all so easy and natural.

I hesitated, wondering, when Ella took the initiative, stepping within a few inches of me. She looked up under fluttering eyes. Her eyes were definitely inviting me to kiss her. In a fluid motion of desperation, to see if this girl, or any other girl, for that matter, could make me feel as alive as Rose did, I bent down and placed my mouth on hers.

Her lips parted very little. They felt stiff and unyielding beneath mine. Her scent was all wrong, too. Instead of the warm lavender smell that was burned into my senses, my nostrils were being invaded with a cool, soapy smell that was totally unsatisfying.

I wasn’t going to give up so easily, though. I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her tighter into my embrace, attempting to press her into me enough that I could feel her body through the heavy dress.

A soft gasp escaped her lips, and her mouth began to move more urgently on mine. I waited for the powerful feelings of anticipation and desire to wash over me, but they were held at bay, with only a dull ache deep within me that was incredibly disappointing.

Everything about her was completely wrong to me: the smell; the touch; even the taste. Maybe in time she’d become familiar to me, and my feelings toward her would change, but I doubted it. And I didn’t want to wait for it to happen. Not being able to handle another second of trying to force myself to respond to her, I pulled back suddenly. I would have let go of her completely, but she swayed and I kept my hand on her waist to steady her. The last thing I needed was for her to faint.

“Oh, Noah, I knew you had feelings for me,” she exclaimed breathlessly.

At that moment, looking at her flushed face and her bright eyes, I realized she was exhibiting more life than I’d ever seen from her before. Abruptly, I felt like a complete and utter dog. It wasn’t her fault that I didn’t find her attractive. Most of the boys, if not all of them in the community, would have been turned on by her kiss. With me it was different, though. Rose had ruined me for any other girl.

“I’m sorry about that kiss, Ella,” I apologized.

“Oh—it’s fine with me, Noah. Will you be talking to my father tonight?” she asked confidently.

What was I to say to that? After all, I had just kissed her, and in our community that usually meant a courtship would follow quickly.

“Not tonight, Ella,” I said without meeting her eyes. Glimpsing the watermelons on the bottom shelf, I squeezed past her to pick up the largest one and hurry from the small room. I could hear her footsteps softly behind me. I hoped that she wouldn’t blab the kiss to all the other girls, knowing full well that the entire community would know about it by morning.